Spent the day trying to distract myself from my thoughts by going for a walk in downtown earlier. It didn't help. I come home and my mother tells me how my younger brother is getting serious with a girl and why am I being so picky with girls and just settle down, like I have an option. I lost a girl a few months back, I never felt this strongly for a girl before..I still feel that sting. I am trying to talk to a girl I met through a friend that seemed interested before, but now she isn't. I feel beyond frustrated dealing with girls.

I'm stuck in a very bad mood tonight, I'm trying to put myself into a good mood to go out, but I know I'll probably just end up feeling even more down, seeing other people having a good time. I just feel really hopeless and tired all the time. Everytime I try to open up about this to friends and family, I get ignored or they just aggravate me even more. I hate feeling like this, like all hope is has been sucked out of my body.

I wish I could just be free to leave this place behind and go somewhere nice. I really need a break from everything.