My 'stats' are in my profile.
TLDR: You're allowed to express interest to a girl with a boyfriend. She's allowed to leave him for you. This isn't unusual or immoral.
I have consistently, on dating advice subreddits and dating advice youtube videos, seen girls with boyfriends treated as huge "NO GO!" zone, sometimes even from "red pill" / "red pill aware" folks. Forget it, they say. Move on. Perish the thought. Why? According to them, it is both impractical and immoral.
1.. Its impractical, they claim, because its completely hopeless! She's taken, and that must be mean her current boyfriend is super-duper amazing and you could never possibly be more attractive! Theirs is a sanctified star-crossed union, sealed by @'ing one another in their instagram profiles with a heart emoji! WHAT CHANCE DO YOU HAVE AGAINST SUCH UNFLAGGING LOVE?! You will only embarrass yourself, you fool!
Bull@#$%. Women frequently don't know what they want (or need) and they frequently have placeholder boyfriends. That doesn't mean you tell her to break up with her boyfriend, but it does mean you can 1) tell her you find her attractive (if words are even necessary), 2) make it clear that you're available.
2.. Its immoral, they claim, because "SHE'S TAKEN!" Except, she's not 'taken'. Dating isn't engagement or marriage, and isn't the purpose of dating to find the person you want to spend the rest of your life with? Wouldn't we expect people to leave their SO if they found a better option? I'm not promoting callously jumping from one relationship to the next, but let's be honest about dating. No one is entitled to a 'happily ever after', not to mention that the idea that each SO is evaluated in isolation without respect to at least the possibility of other options is ludicrous.
Another one I hear is, "If she leaves him for you, she'll leave you for someone else." She will? And so what if she did? That's her decision, and I don't want to be with someone who doesn't think I'm their best option, anyway.
What the matter boils down to is this: a lot of guys have Oneitis. They want to believe "I'm yours, and your mine" no matter what stage the relationship is at. They're afraid to accept the fact that they might not be the best option for her, hence the need to create emotion-based rhetoric to protect their beta virtues. If another guy "steals" their girl, they can claim the moral high ground instead of having to confront the cold, hard reality that they weren't as attractive to her as another man.
Note: Avoid a girl who is willing to get emotionally involved with you before she has finalized the breakup with her boyfriend. Depending on the situation, it may be appropriate to let her 'cool off' from her previous relationship to ensure that you aren't an emotional rebound.
Story Time
In February 2010 I was at a work conference in LA. I approached a gorgeous blonde who I recognized from university but didn't know personally. We hit it off and spent countless hours together that week hanging out. At some point she revealed that she had a boyfriend of a few months. No worries. We added each other on Facebook and stayed in touch over the next couple of months through young professionals groups in our area. I never explicitly said I liked her, and vice versa, but the connection was obvious.
Shocker --- in early April, her Facebook status said 'single', we started talking soon thereafter, and within a month we were dating. Didn't work out long-term. She was single for a year after me. Eventually she met her now-husband and has a great marriage and nice family. Crazy, huh? Apparently, a girl leaving her boyfriend for another guy doesn't mean she's a perpetually discontent wanderer.
Do you have any similar stories?
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