When no means yes

V_Virtus · 2014-08-30T05:46:18+00:00

If a chick is actually verbalizing the word no and we haven't discussed this before and come up with a safe word. I'm fucking done. Intimate activities are over.

There are plenty of other girls who don't do this and then you don't run the risk of rape allegations.

Better to sacrifice a ONS or a plate than get dominated by the courts.

If she is not being specific and stopping your advances but still into the activities you can use hot and cold to bypass this. Doesn't work every time.

Himalayan_Hillbilly · 2014-08-30T09:53:15+00:00

In the case I am referring to the girl and I were sitting together. I was running my hands up and down her back under her shirt and massaging her scalp. When I went in for the kids she died me and said "You know nothing is going to happen tonight". She then also asked me about another girl who I had been working on before. She didn't literally say the word no. I understand that an actual no means no, but what about other responses?

LS_D · 2014-08-30T12:53:56+00:00

When a woman makes you wait for sex you are not her highest priority. Sexuality is spontaneous chemical reaction between two parties, not a process of negotiation. It’s sex first, then relationship, not the other way around. A woman who wants to fuck you will find a way to fuck you.

She will fly across the country, crawl under barbwire, climb in through your second story bedroom window, fuck the shit out of you and wait patiently inside your closet if your wife comes home early from work – women who want to fuck will find a way to fuck.

The girl who tells you she needs to be comfortable and wants a relationship first is the same girl who fucked the hot guy in the foam cannon party in Cancun on spring break just half an hour after meeting him.

hehe! this is so true!

I’ve never been a proponent of breaking down LMR (last minute resistance) with a woman. Maybe it’s a result of experiences in my rock star 20’s, but at some point I came to the conclusion that sex with a woman who’s turned on by me is always a far better than one where I had to sell her on the idea of sex with me before the act.

Overtly agreeing to wait for her to become sexual is anti-seductive. It confirms for her that you aren’t a sexualized player to her; an Alpha wouldn’t wait for sex and she knows this. Worse still, it devalues her SMV as being worth less than of your utmost urgency.

You want her to be so into you that she’s willing to break the rules. The ideal situation is for her genuine passion to be so uncontrollable for you that she’d renounce her religion and throw her convictions to the wind to be with you. That might seem a bit dramatic, but you get the idea.

A lot of “waiters” find all that a tough road to hoe. They want to stick it out and see if things “might develop”, and NEXTing their ‘waiting girl’ seems a lot like throwing the baby out with the bath water after all the time they’ve invested in building what they think is rapport.

Usually this is due to the guy not spinning (enough) other plates that would bear more fruit. However, keep this in mind; waiting for sex isn’t building rapport.

There’s a lot of confusion about rapport, most of which is due to well meaning PUAs conflating rapport with comfort. It’s a pretty esoteric term, but rapport is a connection; it’s an implied trust between two acting agents who previously had never met or only have limited knowledge of each other.

You can have rapport with an animal – that’s the connection, it’s instinctual.

Comfort comes from familiarity and predictability; all decidedly anti-seductive influences. And while comfort has it’s own merits in interpersonal relationships, it is not the basis for genuine, passionate sexual desire.

this guys knows what he's talking about imo

P>S many thanks to /u/Enterthenooch for the link from which to copypasta!

Here2lrn · 2014-08-30T09:57:36+00:00

Personally, I think freezing out is the best way:

"Ok, night. (Roll over to go sleep)."

10 minutes later, she's mounting you, I guarantee it.

kempff · 2014-08-30T13:55:45+00:00

"Computer end simulation."

Title	When no means yes
Author	Himalayan_Hillbilly
Upvotes	4
Comments	7
Date	August 30, 2014 5:23 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2ezgb2/when_no_means_yes/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/when-no-means-yes.141748 https://theredarchive.com/post/141748

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