Learn from me.

Insaneflirt_max · 2020-02-27T05:45:09+00:00

Why would you show her around? To make friends or to seduce her. If you tried to seduce her, you made exactly 0 move from beginning to end so you friend zoned yourself.

SmokingBeneathStars · 2020-02-27T12:26:37+00:00

[permanently deleted]

recyclablebanthas · 2020-02-29T00:14:42+00:00

1

Met a girl through a travel group and we went hiking together because she was new in town. No other pretext.

Not sure why you're talking about "pretext" here.

Meeting someone through a travel group is fine and normal.

Note that it indicates interest on her part if she's agreeing to meet up with you. She didn't have to. She met others presumably at the travel group.

2

She ended up being super cute and smart and we hit it off and had a great conversation.

This is the step of "seduction" that we really don't have control over in the end: whether or not you hit it off with her or not.

There's no way to ensure this happens so it's always nice when it does. But half of "game," is simply getting out of your own way so that this initial process can be relaxed until you know where the chemistry is at.

3

Later that night I showed her around town and took her to a few cool bars, I feel like there is some chemistry, feeling good.

So you guys were hanging out ALL day and night, basically, right? That's also big. She could have begged off after a couple hours in the afternoon.

Staying with you as night fell was obviously a sign that she'd made up her mind that she'd like something to happen.

4

Meetup with another friend later that night.....she is down to go hiking again soon.

Here, it starts to be a logistical problem, apparently. She was apparently down, but instead of planning for ending back at your place, you had already planned for an unintentional cock-blocker to join you guys.

Also note that if you're after something serious, it's fine to be introducing her to your friends, but if you want something casual, it's better not to do that.

Still, she was interested enough that she agreed with the excuse that you guys should meet again soon.

5

Couple days later I go hiking with her again and her new friend.....

Later that night.... I meet up with her and her friend and take them out.

So once again this girl is meeting you at night after already having seen you during the day. Girls aren't going to be this obvious for long, man.

6

Playfully flirt with her and feel like I'm playing my cards just right.

This is too vague.

What constitutes flirting? What exactly were you doing?
For that matter, how was she responding?
Was she initiating touch on her own?

7

Bar we are at is full of dudes and they are all over her, I play it cool and do my thing.....

...... I suggest we leave.... take them to a bunch of clubs.....

All good and well. You left out how things went at those clubs though.

What sort of physical escalation was there with either girl at the club?

8

Night ends and the three of us are at their hostel.

Again, this was a logistical issue. There was an extra person with you and you didn't end up at a place very conducive to much escalation. Unless she had a private room there?

9

We chat a bit and I play chess with her. Her friend leaves.....

She agreed to play fucking chess after being at a club. She was really going along with any excuse.

You could invite her alone over for a movie night. If she was willing to play chess, she'll go along with it.

10

I should have made a move...... the moment was right....

Was the time right though?

It wasn't, unless there was a place for the sex to actually happen.

If you were sitting there in a common room in a hostel and she was sleeping in a dorm room, then no, it wasn't the right time or place.

The time would have been back when you were at the bar or at the first club.

You probably had a good enough feel that you knew you should have invited her back to your place way back then. Certainly by midnight or so.

You shouldn't have been sitting there playing chess at 5 am.

11

Cut all this self-punishment out. Experiences like this are how you get the motivation to act next time.

And like I said, what you do is not complicated. You pretty much had it with this girl apparently, you just needed to ask her back to your place.

You don't need to "state your intent" or some nonsense. You show your intent.

You were partially there because you kept setting the stage by setting up meets.

You just didn't pull the trigger. Which could have been asking her back to your place even after the damn hikes!

Especially if I'm reading into this right and she was initiating contact on her own.

FairAnalyst · 2020-02-27T14:43:06+00:00

I noticed that no matter how many women I've taken to bed, that making the move to escalate always made me feel tension.

Most guys operate on a principle that they do what 'feels right'. As in they're like water, they go the easy path and avoid anything with tension. Even in flirting, they flirt in a way that isn't hard for them to do. As a result, their tension tolerance is very low.

But getting a lot of consistent game results like pulls and lays requires pushing into the tension. Being able to run into without it affecting you, and doing the right moves to make things happen.

If you don't learn how to manage tension, you'll always end up flinching when you need to make the move and you'll miss every opportunity.

2020-02-27T04:24:29+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	Learn from me.
Author	Toasty_Boy
Upvotes	26
Comments	23
Date	February 27, 2020 4:18 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/fa6gk4/learn_from_me/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/learn-from-me.1293008 https://theredarchive.com/post/1293008

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