TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

Eulenwatcher Archive

View 19 posts and 37,438 comments by Eulenwatcher on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
70

DebateEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/23 07:05 PM
69

CMVEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 08:34 AM
56

DiscussionEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/23 03:13 PM
25

Question For MenEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/23 04:09 PM
24

DebateEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/24 07:35 PM
20

Question For MenEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 02:08 PM
17

DiscussionEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/24 02:18 AM
12

EulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/23 01:08 AM
11

DiscussionEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 06:56 PM
10

EulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/23 06:25 PM
7

DiscussionEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/23 04:31 PM
6

DiscussionEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/23 05:07 AM
4

DiscussionEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/23 11:40 PM
4

DiscussionEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/24 06:24 PM
2

EulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/23 11:15 PM
2

DebateEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/24 09:42 PM
1

DiscussionEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/23 09:15 PM
1

DiscussionEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/23 09:00 PM
0

DiscussionEulenWatcher/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/23 04:21 AM
Showing the 1,000 most recent of 37,438 comments.
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Do you think a woman who was forced into sex work as a minor has a lot of options to get out?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/25 03:38 AM
–

I get anxious when I don’t have a job. Being a housewife is really not my cup of tea. I guess it would be different if I was a fund baby or something.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/25 03:15 AM
–

Oh, that sounds wonderful.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/25 12:28 AM
3

I nudge women who willingly engage in sex work if they have other options.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/25 12:28 AM
–

Oh, Zair, no.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/25 12:27 AM
–

Bottled?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 09:10 PM
–

Just ask for a video call, what’s the issue?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 08:20 PM
–

It doesn't change my disgust towards people who are willing to buy those services.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 06:55 PM
–

I'm pretty sure people generally do not choose to be in a situation where others have to wipe them. It isn't their choice - it's a necessity. You can't say the same about sex though. Sex is an activity that is supposed to be shared between partners who do want it. You can't say the same about coal mining and being a nurse though. I do think that certain jobs have to be automated as much as we can because people shouldn't work in those conditions. I hope we'll get there.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 06:54 PM
6

I believe that sex should be shared between people who do feel attraction and desire to have sex with each other. Having sex that you do not want to have can be a traumatic experience, and I believe that sex work leads to mental health issues for a lot of people involved in it. As a client, you have no way to be sure that a person you pay for sex wasn't trafficked or forced into it as a minor and just couldn't get out. If you're okay with this risk....we have very different morals. Plus, I do th…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 06:36 PM
–

There's a difference between having sex because you want to have sex and having sex because you need money. I feel disgust towards people who have sex with their spouses knowing that their spouses feel obliged - not turned on to sleep with them as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 06:34 PM
8

Common sense things: Pay attention to what she says and how she acts around you and around other people. If she's disrespectful in the beginning of relationship, she's belittling, mocking etc., things are only going to get worse over time. If all her exes were abusive according to her, if she doesn't seem capable of holding long-term friendships, there are also bad signs. Generally, she's always negative about other people, it's a red flag. Pay attention to what she says. If she dreams about bei…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 06:32 PM
–

Casual sex still implies desire to have it and some level of attraction to your casual partner. Buying sex means you're ready to have sex with someone who doesn't want it with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 05:28 PM
–

I wouldn’t care much about it as long as they aren’t posting nudes or addresses.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 03:48 PM
–

It can be both ah the same time. They might think that their need is so great that they’re willing to have sex with an unwilling person selling their consent. It’s still disgusting, but these men will do it whatever social judgment is.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 03:22 PM
–

If they can’t have enthusiastic sex and have to pay to get access to sex, it still doesn’t deny the idea that paid sex is sex with someone who doesn’t want to be intimate with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 02:18 PM
–

Do you think admitting that Indian culture is deeply patriarchal means supporting “whites”?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 03:13 AM
2

Sorry! Yeah, I don't get how some people can put huge toys down there. It is...frightening.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 08:47 PM
2

Most dildos aren’t bad dragons - you have to specifically go for this type of toys.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 08:13 PM
1

Well, we wouldn’t last for >11 years, if we didn’t have any level of self-awareness. I hate the trend for feminine energy and kept women. Our mothers and grandmothers pushed us to make our own money for a reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 07:21 PM
8

People do not die from being single.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 05:55 PM
1

How is she sepoy? It's not racism to say that certain cultures are awful for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 05:54 PM
–

Last time we went on a date, we listened a bit to a couple at the next table. The guy couldn’t stop blabbing about his hobbies, and the girl was visibly bored. Two questions he asked her were about the movie she watched last time, and who she lives with lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 05:52 PM
8

Men are free to reject a woman who’s interested in them. Choosing a shitty partner over being single is still a choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 05:47 PM
1

I don’t think she’s being racist there. You yourself admit how bad India women, and the fact that there are abusive white men doesn’t change it.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 07:32 AM
0

If she’s a racist, does it mean she should be abused?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 06:18 AM
1

It is still very optimistic. For some people laws aren’t necessary the most important thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 06:18 AM
1

That…is very optimistic. Laws changing doesn’t mean that all people suddenly start following them.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 06:10 AM
0

Glad that she wrote “dated”. Hope she’s doing better these days.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 06:10 AM
6

You don’t follow the same standards though, do you?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 12:39 AM
0

Adults don’t have much time to hang out with their friends. It’s still healthy to make time for your friends, but it’s usually more purposeful compared to teenage years.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 12:36 AM
1

I don’t. My husband and I met in university, and I’ve never used dating apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 12:35 AM
7

Mm…one example I can give is the same as in my comment - I think it’s reasonable to be upset if your partner doesn’t care of you if you’re sick. My husband’s family isn’t very caring, so he didn’t grow up seeing or learning what you’re supposed to do. It still sucked the first time when we started living together and I got sick, and I had to communicate everything that is pretty common sense, and I’d done for him before. I did communicate my frustration later on, and it helped.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 12:27 AM
20

The balance is important. You can communicate your desire for spontaneous romantic efforts from your partner, and it’s on them to be able to be spontaneous or at least pretend they are. From the other hand, if you feel that you have to communicate everything, each little detail, and things that are generally considered as common sense, and you’re expected to communicate the same thing over and over again…your partner either doesn’t care for you, or you two aren’t compatible. Communication is gre…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 12:15 AM
–

I’m demi, but I think it’s still a mix of everything with emotional connection taking up more space than it usually does. It isn’t pure personality. Yeah, I’d marry a woman if we were compatible, had a good relationship and we’re attracted were attracted to each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 10:29 PM
–

Are you asexual?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 10:21 PM
–

Because my husband…is not a woman? He’s the person I’m into, so why would I marry a woman instead?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 10:20 PM
1

I think break up rates are more even between men and women. It’s divorce initiating where we see the difference.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 10:19 PM
0

Oh no, I feel bad for the guy. I hope he’ll find the strength to leave her.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 10:17 PM
–

Well, I’m not attracted to men as a group, but I’m capable to feel attraction to individuals, both men and women. I also didn’t have marriage as a goal, but I met my husband, we dated and cohabitated for ~4 years and decided that we want to spend our life together. Basically, I’m not attracted not I’ve never wanted to marry “men”. I’m attracted and want to be with my husband. Does it clear up the confusion?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 10:15 PM
0

Does it answer your question “why can’t women…”?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 08:33 PM
1

You might not claim that, but there are a lot of men parroting the idea that all women have lots of good men willing to date them and make everything to keep them happy.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 08:32 PM
-2

They have to be far more on guard than older women…because of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 06:17 PM
4

The same is true for women. Not all relationships are equal, and some just aren’t worth your efforts.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 06:13 PM
11

Most women don’t measure their partner’s dick with a tape, so a) they probably don’t know the exact size and b) men usually don’t get caught when they’re over-exaggerating their size. I’d guess women who have tried buying dildos are more aware about real sizes though.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 05:57 AM
–

On average, 3-4 times a week is a good frequency for me, but if I have plenty of free time and I’m not stressed, it can rise to daily. My primary love languages are physical touch and quality time, so hugs, kisses, back rubs, holding hands, talking at night, walks in a park, trying out a new cafe or going to one of our regulars and chat etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 05:52 AM
3

It would be nice if he was more mindful about my very verbal hints, but no one can be ideal. I don’t think I give a lot of non verbal hints to start with - I do expect him to think a bit more and account for my needs, just as I do it for him, but if I want something specific, I just say do. By accounting for each other’s needs, I mean pretty simple things - cook some food if you’re free and the other is at work, buy medicine if one is sick etc. He usually doesn’t struggle with these things.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 05:46 AM
–

Ughh, this is not a kind of friends I have.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/25 02:27 PM
8

Who are you though? When we love a person, we love them in a way we can perceive them, and it includes their physical body. Heck, your personality doesn't matter much if you're ghost.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 11:43 PM
4

It does for various reasons including health, signs of fitness, and what you possible can pass on to your kids. What does it have to do with conditional or unconditional love though? It seems you can't stay on topic.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 11:41 PM
14

Love is real, and it’s conditional by default unless we talk about more religious/spiritual form of love to “all humans/all living beings”. I’d argue that even parental and filial love has conditions - you have to be a parent/kid to receive it, and there are behaviors that can kill this love as well. Romantic love is conditional as well. It grows from infatuation, which is at least partially consists of physical attraction. We’re still animals, so it makes sense that appearance plays a big role …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 09:55 PM
–

I know too many good men in relationships with women though.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 09:41 PM
1

You yourself are a contradiction to your own beliefs though.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 01:41 PM
2

Men don’t love women unconditionally. If a woman isn’t a virgin, you’re not gonna love her, aren’t you? Or if she’s not pretty enough. I’m also pretty sure that men in dead bedroom situation do not keep loving their partners, so “without getting anything in return” really doesn’t hold well.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 01:36 PM
1

That’s telling.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 05:07 AM
–

Aren’t you pursuing a virgin wife?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 05:06 AM
1

No, just pointing it out. I think visual preferences are fine - men and women do look differently, but if you have moral code or values you want your partner to have, you should follow them yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 05:03 AM
1

Height is a physical preference, and women pursing rich husbands are looked down at as gold diggers. In your case, it’s hypocrisy as it’s about morals.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 04:51 AM
2

Congrats on being clean for 4 months! Sending good vibes to her.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 04:49 AM
1

You are not a virgin though. Why would you pursue a virgin wife?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 04:45 AM
–

I don’t think the problem is in men desiring sex. The problem is in people who do not understand boundaries, who are willing to lie to get sex, who sexualize women whether it makes sense in the given context or not. Seeing comments about “(un)fuckability” under all kinds of pictures with women, men rating and perceiving female characters primarily for their sexuality, sexual harassment online and offline etc. grows old very fast and makes women far less in favor of men’s sexuality in general. Wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 04:45 AM
1

Why would you even discuss dating if you’re gonna just do an arrange marriage?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 04:00 AM
1

I’ve seen an Indian subreddit with lots of guys complaining about dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 03:53 AM
1

“Incel” is just an insult at this point. It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re single and struggling, as the word has lost its meaning. For an Indian guy set to get an arranged marriage, you seem to involves in western dating though.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 03:48 AM
2

Most men can’t realistically support a whole household just on one income. Even using this fact alone, we can say that most women don’t true financially to their household. Pretty much all women of working age in my family do work. They contribute to their household bills, cover the mortgage they have etc. My mother was supporting her mom and her younger sister taking care of her for years. She bought her brother a car. These days husband does cover most of our bills, but it’s temporary, as I’m …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 03:47 AM
4

A lot of people struggle financially as it is. If some don’t want to get married in the first place, why would they try it out? Marrying a friend makes more sense. Some people would feel the pressure and settle for someone they aren’t really into or who isn’t compatible with them. Divorce is an option, but, again, financial struggles sometimes do pressure people ti stay together.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 04:11 PM
9

You have to address how you actually want to improve or change it. Just screaming that it’s unfair won’t help anyone. Lots of things are unfair, but you can’t change them by complaining.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 03:52 PM
6

I think the percent of couples who stay purely out of necessity or stay in a few bedroom situation are lower than it used to be though. Divorce rates are lower than they used to be right after the implementation of no fault divorce law, and couples divorcing means they chose not to stay in an unhappy marriage, so…it’s good imv. Better than being stuck with a partner you just tolerate.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 03:51 PM
–

He’s a I’ve average in both. Increasing it any further would make no sense. I’d be willing to remove a few inches from his height in favor of a better family/medical history if he was okay with it himself. Quality of life > height.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 03:35 PM
9

Tbh I think there used to be far more marriages where a man and a woman were stuck together just for the sake of social status, economic reasons, and kids. Dead bedrooms probably used to be much more common.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 03:34 PM
–

Some women enjoy it, just as some men enjoy taking huge dongs anally. It doesn’t mean it stands true for all people.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 03:30 PM
19

We’ll see some increase in birth rates, but I doubt that unwanted kids would make good citizens in the long-run. Women who don’t want to couple with men probably would be more willing to couple with other women to share the burden of childcare. There’d be an increase in heterosexual marriages as well, but I’d expect a noticeable percent of lavender marriages, marriages between friends, and marriages with dead bedrooms.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 03:29 PM
22

In countries with legalized gay marriages, I’d expect to see far more lesbian couples.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 03:02 PM
27

People are entitled to seeking romantic partners, but no one is promised that they get one.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 03:01 PM
24

How would you actually achieve it? If women are less interested in partnering up with men or pursuing casual, you can’t really force them and except them to be willing and content partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 03:01 PM
–

There are physical limits to how much dick you can take, and at some point it just becomes painful and not pleasurable. You can experiment with your ass to check this idea - holes can accommodate different sizes, but there’s a point where it’s just too much and doesn’t add any pleasure.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 02:57 PM
–

Yep, make it any larger, and say goodbye to blowjobs or sex in general.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 02:54 PM
–

I’d rather edit his family history and deleted some chronic illnesses. I have no desire for him to be taller or to have a bigger dick tbh.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 02:53 PM
37

This topic has been brought up for some time now. Articles about lonely single men have been popping out here and there, and this topic is heavily discussed on social medias. How do you think it should be addressed though? I think a lot of men reject the general advice to work on their social circle and learn to create and maintain bonds with each other, so they’d be less dependent solely on romantic relationships, and a lot of guys do not feel like putting more efforts into approaching women or…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 02:52 PM
12

The stereotype is that it’s not hard to please a guy: sex, food, don’t nag and presently leave him be. I don’t fully agree with it. A lot of men do need emotional support and quality time. At least if they do see their partner as an LTR partner and not just casual lay or a bang maid. My partner values emotional connection, so I can fuck his brains out, but if I’m not up to our usual long talks, he’ll feel neglected anyway. He tends to vent more than I do, and he likes taking through his worries/…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 12:03 PM
1

What do you think people should do in this position? If they've genuinely tried everything they could? I don't think that dating or marriage aren't important - they are if you believe they are. They just aren't for everyone, and a lot of people are content being single or partnered but not married.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 03:15 AM
1

I think that being single not by choice is also negative. People can be single and fulfilled, but it's harder to achieve when you're single not due to your own decision to be single. It doesn't mean that you can be content only if you're partnered up though.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 03:13 AM
1

I get what you're talking about. Being single not by choice sucks - you desperately want something that you can't get, and you can't always even pinpoint why you can't get it. Assuming that a person really can't find any dates and they really have tried everything they could, what are they supposed to do though? If they genuinely believe, it isn't something they can fix, learning to live single is pretty much the only thing that is left besides just being miserable.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 03:12 AM
–

Fuura, it's hard to get your idea here. A lot of men do like flaunting their strength "hoho, I'm so strong, look at me". A lot of men do say that women are weak and small. There are also men who do not like being treated differently due to their physical strength - they aren't really in favor of having to lift heavy stuff and move things around the office just because they're guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/25 05:44 PM
–

That is the reality for a lot of people though. College isn't affordable for everyone nor it's something that 100% want to pursue. I expect that a lot of people from our generation won't be able to retire either - we have to plan and account for that.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/25 05:31 PM
–

Fuura, do you realize that you just want a woman who pays into men’s fantasies? We have very low motivation to do so for strangers.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/25 03:51 PM
–

Women who “lean to their sexuality” play to men’s fantasies about them and have to deal with men’s attention more than others. Unless they’re really really into this kind of attention, it makes sense they squeeze something more for themselves out of it. A playboy gets sex - that’s his squeeze.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/25 03:49 PM
–

You can see it as celebrating another stage of life. We celebrate birthdays, school and university graduations, having a baby, some people throw retirement parties etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/25 03:20 PM
–

I believe that romantic relationships and intimacy are important, and they can greatly improve one’s quality of life. I also think that a lot of people aren’t cut out for LTRs, and there are single and abstinent men and women with fulfilling lives. It’s harder to make peace with it when it’s not by choice - but learning to find meaning in other aspects of your life and maintains platonic bonds with others also can improve your quality of life. On the topic of weddings…I don’t get why people spen…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/25 03:18 PM
–

Fuura, women aren’t going to act in a way to fulfill your fantasies about them. It makes sense that women who are okay with men sexualizing them on a daily basis are demanding. They fill the niche I guess. From the other hand, a lot of us just don’t want to be seen as sexual targets by men who aren’t our partners. I have zero interest in being flirty or alluring for guys who aren’t my husband. That’s it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/25 03:11 PM
–

In my view, this is not an insult given the context of the discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 11:56 PM
–

This is not an insult, but other mods are free to intervene. Inability to talk about averages isn’t something shameful, but it does make it harder to participate in a debate or discussion. In my original comment, I didn’t talk about you - I talked about averages. Was it not clear from the context?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 10:24 PM
–

Logos, yes, I’m a mod. How is saying that you can’t talk about averages right after your previous comment about you not being a person an insult?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 10:20 PM
–

We’re talking about averages, but it seems you can’t do that.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 09:56 PM
–

People react poorly to advice from someone they don’t respect or at times they aren’t ready for it. The idea that people recreate their trauma in different relationships is from psychology. A decent therapist will explain it to their patients who struggle with it. TRP would claim that all women are like that, and it’s just biology.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 09:39 PM
–

Do you enjoy self-play at all?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 09:35 PM
2

Makes sense, but kids should learn to think on their own. I have school children who try to pass chatGPT essays for theirs while they struggle with writing a proper paragraph on their own.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 04:23 AM
1

You also don't actually learn much yourself nor you learn to work with data.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 03:18 AM
2

I’d be upset about him lying, but it would depend how overall our relationship was going and what kind of impression he gave. If he created intricate lies about two non-existing LTRs and he held this lies for a long time, that would be a deal breaker. It would overall indicate that he’s too comfortable ale about lying. If he just told me that he had an ex without much details, and he spilt the beans in a few weeks, I could get over it.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 08:57 PM
–

I'd be the most worried about her having to coparent and realizing that it was harder than she thought. Starting living together after marriage is already hard, imagine stepping in not just into a new household, but into a role of a stepmother as well with zero experience prior to it.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 06:26 PM
–

Well, he’s much older, he’s divorced, and he has a kid who has autism. I guess she’s either deeply in love or she wants to move countries.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 05:28 PM
–

Really rare these days - I'm married and I don't go out much on my own. Same thing - very rarely, and probably due to the same reasons. No, I'm demisexual, and meeting someone who I could feel some sexual attraction to is exceptionally rare for me. I'm in my late 20s, and it's happened just 3 times so far. No, for the same reason, plus, it's hard to find someone compatible. Having said that, dating has been easy for me - mostly because I met my husband when I was 16, so I basically skipped most …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 01:31 PM
2

Some of those women are single. And, again, you don't have to be single to know that there's life besides relationships. I do acknowledge that it's much harder to deal with when it isn't exactly your choice, but it's not that a person who can't get any dates has a lot of options. Learning to accept their life as a single person would be helpful to them whether they're trying to date or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 01:25 PM
19

Again, saying that sex and romance aren’t the only things in life isn’t the same as saying these things aren’t important. They are. There are also other important things you can do and enjoy. There are celibate women. Men ignore them because women have lower libido or “they’re lying”.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 06:10 AM
2

I think a lot of women go on dates with men who they’re neutral about, at least if they meet on dating apps. I’m demi, and I’ve felt attraction to so few people that going on a date “blindly” would most likely be a total waste of time. I’ve ever felt attraction only to people from my social circle who I’d seen on a regular basis for weeks first.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 05:43 AM
26

There are more things in life besides sex and romantic relationships. It doesn’t mean these things don’t matter though. People who can’t get any dates or relationships would benefit from learning to value other aspects of life. They can keep trying to date - but tying all their life meaning and value to it might be counterproductive.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 05:39 AM
–

Only you didn’t. Provide the stats for both India and the US with the description of what exactly they counted and how.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 04:29 PM
–

You and I talked about it, and you’ve admitted you misinterpreted the data.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 03:31 PM
5

It isn’t something I’d do or recommend anyone doing. Your parents can vet a partner for glaring red flags, look up his family history, his career etc., but they can’t really ensure that you two are compatible or that you have good sexual chemistry. It’s a way to marry if you see marriage as a business partnership and you’re okay with dead bedroom situation. Moreover, I’ve chatted with a few people from India - your parents look for a partner, you go on a few dates, and that’s basically it. I’d n…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/25 02:27 PM
2

I think concentrating on promoting healthy communication would be more useful. Calling these groups "no divorce" just makes it one-sided, and avoiding a divorce shouldn't be the end goal on its own. If one party puts the efforts to make their marriage work, but their partner is not cooperative, they can't really do much.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/25 04:59 AM
1

Most people do not have abusive exes
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/25 04:47 AM
1

What happened with guys more broad looks standards? On a serious note, most likely men who are on a similar visual level with her and who, hopefully, do find her endearing.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/25 05:56 PM
1

They prioritized traits important for long-term commitment. Maybe they're also pretty low libido, so they've never put much value to it. Over the years, they got curious though.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/25 05:34 PM
2

How old are you? I think older generations have it harder in this regard, but younger are more aware about mental health and that men aren't rocks either.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/25 05:25 PM
1

People with deeply traumatic past aren't a majority to start with, and a lot of them often struggle with forming/keeping romantic relationships, so I'm not surprised that we don't see a huge number of couples like that. My close friend dated a guy who had been previously abused by 2 of his exes - he was a mess. She was as supportive as she could, but it didn't work anyway. It depends on the past and on the way you talk about it. "All my exes were bitches" is a red flag whatever gender we're talk…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/25 05:21 PM
1

Considering women more often go on therapy, I'd guess men might bring more baggage on average.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/25 05:11 PM
12

That's unfortunate, but there are women who have been supportive towards their partner who have some traumatic/negative experience form dating. "I'm not your therapist" - a romantic partner, a man or a woman, can't be your therapist. I strongly disagree with people who think that this phrase means that they aren't obliged to provide any emotional support towards their partners. Men...aren't great at being supportive either. The common complaints from women are men not listening to them, not bein…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/25 02:35 AM
21

Both partners are expected to be supportive of each other’s issues. They aren’t expected to be each other’s therapist though. Do you see a difference?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/25 01:14 AM
34

*Some women do that. They’re mentally unstable, have trauma etc. so they rely on their partners a lot in this regard while not being able to reciprocate it. Some men do the same. Generally, it is expected that both partners support each other, and each individual is responsible for their own mental health. Your partner can support you - they can’t cure you, be a responsible adult instead of you or be your therapist. Also, late bloomers can bring their own kind of baggage - years of struggles can…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/25 12:40 AM
–

Good for you, Keeby! This place can be toxic. What have you been doing?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/25 04:32 AM
–

Keeby! Good to see you here. How have you been doing?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/25 11:01 PM
2

We had a good date trying out different food and taking a walk in the park. I'm gonna bake an apple pie and we'll watch Coco.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/25 04:43 AM
1

Some other archetypes you can see in webtoons, including some 18+ ones: Puppy love guy Reserved Duke of the north, but he’s responsible and caring and melts into a puddle for her Crying guy Childhood friend secretly in love with her She saved him, and the dude is ready to move mountains for her
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/25 11:41 PM
5

It would be ideal if we had equal opportunities and responsibilities independent from our gender. It isn’t reality though, and gender stereotypes do affect one’s judgement. Assuming that we didn’t have this negative influence…I’d prefer all laws, opportunities, treatment etc. be equal unless they concern some physiological differences, i.e. ability to give birth etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/25 08:54 AM
–

Yes, if they aren’t willing to learn and cook on a regular basis.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/25 09:27 PM
–

Oh, that sucks. What are you eating? Carbs are good for energy boost, but you'll feel hungry again in an hour or two.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/25 07:57 PM
–

Aren't you the same person waiting for some drugs to be delivered? Also, a week is a silly period of time. Let's talk about half a year at least.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/25 07:56 PM
–

I've never managed to develop caffeine addiction, but I've heard it's hard to deal with.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/25 07:51 PM
–

I think people are bound to slip in to their old habits. You're better off implementing gradual changes instead of trying to cut everything off in one go.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/25 07:51 PM
–

It'll get better.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/25 07:38 PM
–

Maybe it's a sign?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/25 07:38 PM
–

We've seen lots of comments like that. I don't think at least one was fully successful.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/25 07:37 PM
–

She’s also 40 and not monogamous. I really doubt she plans to settle down and have a family.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/25 05:18 PM
4

It’s not just appearance - there are a lot of attractive people, but I feel no sexual attraction to them. I can feel anything without emotional connection. Also, I think him being a giving and caring lover has contributed to keeping our sex life active. I don’t think I’d enjoy having sex if it wasn’t satisfying for me. We’re both somewhat above average for our age group, but I’m sure black pillers would pick both of our looks apart to criticize - neither is “model-tier”, and that’s perfectly fin…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/25 03:32 PM
2

Dude, where the fuck do you work?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/25 03:38 AM
8

Yes. My husband is the man I love and just for. He’s also the only person I’ve ever dated, loved romantically or been intimate with. I’m in my late 20s, and I’ve met only 3 people I’ve been into, including my husband. None fits AF/BB or black pill fantasies about DT traits dynamic. One is a woman to start with. My close friend, someone I deeply cherish but harbor no romantic feelings anymore. Another was my high school crush - he wasn’t tall, he was very kind and soft-spoken. My husband and I st…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/25 03:33 AM
–

If you’re average, your dick still should be enough to be pleasurable. You want to obsess over it - it’s your call/
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 09:48 PM
–

So, why concentrate on it then? You can have good sex by being good at foreplay.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 09:39 PM
–

No, I’m asking whether you can have the type of sec you want.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 09:34 PM
–

This is freezing. I rarely put AC below 25C (it’s around 77C).
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 08:44 PM
–

Attraction isn’t love. Men are just hornier.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 08:41 PM
–

Can you though?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 08:39 PM
1

I doubt that - older women still do much more around the house, so a lack of working hours would just point out the misbalance here.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 05:08 PM
1

I’m sorry, but your post history doesn’t help here. You aren’t outright hateful, but your view on sexuality…is highly peculiar.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 05:07 PM
1

Dude, you said you hate women. You aren’t helping the case here.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 04:29 PM
2

At this point, it’s just speculation. In the same way, you could claim that a man could feel himself emasculated because he wasn’t providing the majority of their income.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 03:24 PM
–

Dude, you specifically fish for stories validating your views. I could find and post lots of stories about abusive men and claim that men are generally abusive. It wouldn’t make my point true though.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 03:22 PM
1

There's usually a reason, but it's rarely a moral failing imv. The resentment built over years of struggles becomes an extra hardship at some point.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 12:29 PM
3

Ah, makes sense. It also depends on one's age. I'd expect younger couples have more even workload compared to older couples. Hence, I pointed out that it depends on a couple - talking about averages is going to give us some huge statistical mistakes and misinterpretations here.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 12:29 PM
1

Eh, I've known some decent guys who didn't have any dates (it was pretty clear why though), so I don't want to say that all these guys are horrible. Harboring resentment never makes one an attractive partner though.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 12:27 PM
5

Doing more around the house makes sense if you have more time and energy. If you're getting burned from your work, hiring help might also be an option. A lot of women also should learn to "let go". Clean floors shouldn't take priority over one's well-being. Comparatively, men should be more mindful about chores - putting groceries away should be a priority over a computer game. The problem with this discussion is that objective is less important than one's perceived fairness. Hence, you have to …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 12:26 PM
1

Sorry to hear that. Death is all around us, but we tend to live as if tomorrow is promised.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 12:24 PM
5

Depends on a couple, if one partner does nothing around the house and they both work similar hours, there'll be misbalance even without kids involved. I'm not sure what you mean by your last two questions. Whether you're conservative or liberal, you most likely still work and you definitely still have housework. I'd guess the difference isn't big among singles.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 12:18 PM
6

I don't think it makes sense to split chores according to one's income. A nurse might make less than a software developer, but she can have longer and more demanding hours. If you see your couple as a unit, splitting chores according got one's free time makes more sense. In the past, I made more while husband had longer working hours, so I was cooking and cleaning more. I'd feel like an idiot if I waited for him to come and cook us dinner because he made less money.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 12:17 PM
3

I didn’t have issues with guys who couldn’t find a date before, but PPD has made them look pretty terrible.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 11:34 AM
2

How are you feeling?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 11:33 AM
19

It depends on a couple. If you live in an apartment, and you both work an office job with comparable hours, whoever does more around the house, childcare, managing/micromanaging the household, does more labor. It is usually a woman, especially when there are kids involved, but things have been improving for quite some time, and I'd guess that a lot of young couples do not have a heavy mismatch of labor. If you live in a house, and a man has more demanding job with longer hours or his wife is a h…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 03:49 AM
3

You do know that most couples cohabitate before they get married, don't you? What you're describing might be common among very young couples and/or deeply religious couples waiting for marriage and not trying out cohabitation first, so for them wedding isn't just a celebration and a change of legal status, but a whole lifestyle change which can come with some shocking surprises about each other. Almost all couples in my social circle cohabitate for at least a year before marrying, so marriage an…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 06:44 PM
6

I think it’s got flipped.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 03:27 PM
2

It might be not your appearance on its own, but the way you behave yourself. It also might be women you go for, as I’ve said before.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 05:59 AM
1

It's hard to say without knowing you, but you might give off "the vibes" or you might go for a certain type of women subconsciously even though they don't look alike.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 05:36 AM
1

Your parents divorcing doesn't mean that love isn't real or that they haven't loved each other. Nothing is permanent though.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 05:35 AM
6

Person's appearance or personality don't necessarily reveal their kinks.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 05:28 AM
1

What does it have to do with black pill? Sorry, you're going through it.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 05:25 AM
8

Then, the common denominator here is you.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 05:07 AM
12

If you keep dating women who are into very aggressive kinks, I'd take a look at your social circle and what kind of women you're into.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 04:42 AM
20

You should look for a woman who is vanilla or has different kinks. I don't think there are specific traits linked to it though. It shouldn't be that confusing. Most women have experience of being sexually harassed at a young age.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 04:32 AM
6

*They might enjoy it as a roleplay. It isn't given though.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 04:27 AM
42

CNC, BDSM, roleplay about kidnapping etc. do not mean that a woman would really like to be raped. In a way, you can compare it to some people having a fantasy about threesomes and hating it in reality. There's also a huge difference between consensually roleplaying something with a partner who you trust and who you're into and actually being violated. The reasons for that can be different. Some SA and abuse victims get into these kinks as a way to deal with their trauma, and we can argue whether…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 04:13 AM
5

Cartoons: Aladdin, Tangled, Frozen. Not exactly millionaires, but royalty marrying a commoner. Movies: It happened one night, an old movie about an heiress. The Proposal - not a millionaire, but a business woman and her male secretary. I don’t think there are a lot of female millionaires either in real life or in movies. There are movies about less wealthier guys with wealthy women.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 12:37 AM
–

If I remember correctly, Spartan women had more rights. Culturally, I’m closer to certain nomadic tribes though.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 10:06 PM
2

Have never seen it, can you elaborate?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 10:05 PM
10

Have you never seen movies about average people? My point is that movies are made to be entertaining. Even if it’s about average people, there has to be some entertaining plot.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 10:05 PM
23

a) Do movies generally depict something realistic? b) Movies generally depict very pretty people, both men and women. Most of us don’t look like Pattinson or Margo Robbie, but we do like looking at them on screens. c) There are movies, books and comics that do not follow the tropics of TRP.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 09:03 PM
–

Depends on the context and the way a man sets the boundary. A man is trying to force his partner to change her wardrobe although he knew perfectly way how she likes to dress before they starting dating is unreasonable. A man saying that he's not comfortable with a certain dress has the right to say so. It's on his partner how she acts about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 07:54 PM
4

Have never had to deal with it. I was rejected when I asked a guy out as a teenager, but I’ve never been intimate with a guy to get rejected/ghosted. I think women who find themselves in this patterns should get men better, wait for a bit before they have sex, and maybe go to therapy.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 07:46 PM
–

*You're cosplaying as a radical. Your life is probably very average though.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 07:41 PM
1

This is not a rare experience really.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 06:36 PM
6

No, I don’t see a problem here. It’s expected that if you get rejected, you distance yourself from each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 06:01 AM
7

Warm approaches work better than cold approaches, but I also wouldn’t recommend to wait for a long time to ask someone out. There’s a whole range between asking out a stranger and asking out your friend of 10 years.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 04:27 AM
–

You can have a big dick, and your partner still might like to combine stimulation.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 10:39 PM
–

I’m sorry, but dick isn’t a magic wand - a lot of women need external stimulation.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 10:30 PM
15

Yes, because I’m married. That’s a sign to cut contact completely, as he was disrespectful towards my husband and our relationship. If I was single, it depends on how close we were. If it’s a good long-term friend, I could try to talk it through and figure it out whether we could keep being friends or now. If it wasn’t a close friend, I’d recuse contact with them and would meet with them only in a group setting. It’s not that there’s a particular issue with it, but I’m not comfortable hanging ou…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 10:25 PM
–

I’m curious why men think that a hookup necessarily means she was strongly into you. I’ve heard stories from women sleeping with a guy because, well, they were too drunk - they don’t even remember the event. My friend “gave in” so the guy would stop following her everywhere - she didn’t even like him. She went on therapy afterwards, yeah.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 09:52 PM
3

What you’re trying to do is to make things “fair” by worsening everyone else’s lives because you yourself struggle. Which still contradicts the idea that life is unfair. Life is unfair in ways we cannot really control. You can’t control DNA you’re born with, you can’t control mutations of a fetus, you can’t control misfortune of very bad coincidences etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 09:09 PM
2

Nope.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 09:01 PM
1

Three different colleges in two different countries.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 09:00 PM
3

Yeah, I’d prefer not to date someone who’s into killing others unless it was self-defense.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 04:49 PM
1

It's okay if she's young/inexperienced, but if it was reciprocated in some ways and/or she's old enough to know better...yeah, she shouldn't have allowed that.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 03:55 PM
2

I think young/inexperienced people can do so without any malicious intent. Adults should know better and not take advantage of situations like that, sure. It's similar to a guy using a woman for sex who clearly wants a relationship knowing perfectly well he's never gonna date her.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 03:23 PM
1

He should have used his mouth and actually asked her out.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 03:01 PM
1

It was probably my an arranged marriage with a guy chosen by her parents, no?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 02:34 PM
1

It doesn’t mean they feel attraction to them though.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 02:32 PM
1

Still disagree. Most women aren’t that desperate to marry guys they aren’t into - it does happen, but not as often as men here seem to claim. Attraction can wither down with time though, so if both partners don’t put efforts to keep romance and sex in their relationship, these things will suffer long-term.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 02:32 PM
3

Not really. Women and men have different sexuality, and both aren’t fans of the other. Men here don’t seem to understand that women aren’t men. If there wasn’t attraction “on the spot” or if she wasn’t willing to jump into the bed with you on the first date, it doesn’t mean she’s settled or something.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 01:58 PM
0

Yep. I’m not surprised by them.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 01:35 PM
1

If you want to limit yourself this way, sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 01:26 PM
0

That’s how attraction works.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 01:26 PM
2

Moral of the story is to be honest about your expectations.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 01:24 PM
3

If he didn’t express his romantic/sexual feelings, it’s on him.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 01:24 PM
0

Why is it hard seeing it?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 01:22 PM
–

There were periods of time when I was making more and/or we both depended solely on my income, and now it’s reversed - he works, I work part-time and study. I could do it full-time, but it would more time.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/25 04:52 PM
–

Nope, but I'm currently getting my second degree to change the field.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/25 03:51 PM
–

Well, I’m already married.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/25 07:51 AM
–

Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/25 03:09 AM
3

Not really. We don’t have a definitive answer to why some people are awful. We know that kids from abusive households have higher risks to be abused as adults or turn out abusive themselves, so parenting and environment you grow up definitely plays a role. From the other hand, we can have two kids from the same household, and only one of them is a piece of shit. It’s probably a result of both nature and nurture - some people have higher chances to tune out “bad”, while others are corrupted by th…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/25 03:28 PM
1

Ghibly doesn’t have a lot of cartoons including romantic love to start with, does it?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/25 04:33 AM
2

I wonder whether people generally form their ideas about love from Disney cartoons or it’s just an American thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/25 04:32 AM
1

You should have done some basic research on the topic before posting it. Even if you just...thought a little bit, your claim wouldn't make much sense. Mental health issues aren't a result solely of worrying about divorce or cheating. A lot of single, never married people have mental health issues without ever being married. You might want to read this study: https://www.nature.com/articles/s41562-024-02033-0
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/25 01:26 AM
2

Seems really unnecessary.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/25 12:46 AM
2

Aww, sweet of you!
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/25 12:00 AM
6

Do women legally prohibit men from pursuing casual sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/25 02:51 PM
–

Of course. Who wants to spend two weeks with a total stranger in seclusion?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/25 02:51 PM
–

Can I choose not to spend two weeks with a stranger?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/25 12:42 PM
6

Laws, laws gatekeep voting if you haven’t been aware about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/25 12:37 PM
6

By the same logic, all singleness data is also self-reported, and you have no proof.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/25 12:35 PM
–

Girl, please, chill.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/25 05:35 AM
–

This is a user permanently banned from PPD, and he still lurks here to harass women. If someone else sends you insults in dms, please, contact the mods.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/25 09:13 PM
8

Social pressure affects both men and women. Men have their own issues caused by it. Extravagant weddings are pretty silly imv.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/25 06:16 PM
7

You should ask women who do care about it - maybe wedding subreddits would give you more insight here. If I had to guess, I think the idea is that pictures stay with you. There's also pressure that "wedding is your best day", so maybe some women feel they want it to be ideal. I can't relate to it because my husband and I just didn't have a wedding to start with.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/25 05:44 PM
37

People who went to clubs and bars with their friends when they were single most likely will want to continue going there even when they’re in a relationship. They might view these places as their setting to socialize with their friends and have fun, not as places to go and hookup. Some men in relationships go to bars/clubs with their friends as well. Some people, single or not, just don’t go to clubs because they don’t like them. Some have similar boundaries to you - it’s on you to seek a partne…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/25 03:27 PM
–

Eh, I was friendsoned. We’ve never dated, and I got over him eventually.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 05:35 PM
1

Reverse the genders and see whether you’d be okay touching your friend the same way or whether you’d be okay with your partner being touched this way by their friends. Generally, people should ask before they touch someone. Don’t grab people without their consent.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 04:12 PM
2

No, and this behavior isn’t just “touchy feely”. I used to be very touchy with all my friends, but I still had boundaries and didn’t want people to misinterpret me. Certain touch is way too intimate and sexually coded to be shared with platonic friends. In a working setting, it’s just sexual harassment.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 03:26 PM
1

I can’t relate to people who jump straight in bed.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 02:47 AM
1

Have you never found yourself liking someone’s appearance more as you got to know them better?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/25 06:35 PM
–

Never had this desire to start with.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/25 01:31 PM
1

Okay, I could live with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/25 12:59 AM
1

Let's go.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/25 12:47 AM
7

People who are in happy relationships, or are truly happy single. Don't engage in these types of topic. Because why would they? PPD is overall about gender relations, and if you have a good relationship, it doesn't mean you can't be interested in the topic, or see certain gendered problems. There is a variety of problems you can have or have experienced with the opposite gender that aren't directly related to dating. Plus, you might want to push against certain views you disagree - especially if…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 01:39 PM
2

Agree, but I doubt they have all really dated narcissists.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 01:32 PM
1

You can actually try and estimate that.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 12:36 PM
3

Tbh I don’t think I know anyone who has said they’ve dated a narcissist if we don’t count online people. Among online people, it’s also mostly men from PPD lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 12:35 PM
–

Not my preference.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/25 12:12 AM
–

That’s nice for a cold winter. I wouldn’t mind wearing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/25 12:11 AM
–

I can relate to your problem from the opposite side - I felt in a similar way when I just started getting into feminism, and I was consuming a lot of content about gender relations and news about women getting raped/abused/killed. I felt that it was everywhere, and I felt very vulnerable and disturbed. I had to make a conscious decision to limit my exposure to this content, and pay attention to men around me who I respect and love...although they do hold some gender stereotypes and might make jo…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 07:27 PM
23

And I understand that some men do some creepy or straight horrible stuff and that women are vary for a reason, it sucks that many women have bad experiences, harassment, catcalling, guys being weird and pushy. But still, if we take a step back and see the core of my above examples as largely biological differences, and if a man attempts to be in peace with his own sexuality, then all of this can be seen as more neutral. Again, at the core. Men being different like this isn't fundamentally wrong.…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 06:21 PM
1

Why are women supposed to be better than you? If men aren't capable of taking responsibility for themselves, should they be trusted at all?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 05:44 PM
1

Do men have no say in who they have relationship or sex with? Can't they reject a woman or use a condom if they aren't planning to have nay kids?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 02:54 AM
2

This is an interesting way to put all responsibility on women as if men take no part in it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 01:28 AM
–

Voicing it is bad taste.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/25 04:43 PM
–

Not if you aren’t into him.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/25 04:42 PM
–

If they were hooking up back then, she’s a predator.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/25 04:41 PM
–

This is a mental illness, isn’t it? I get the appeal - you have a “partner” who just constantly validates you, but it’s not different from masturbation.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/25 04:40 PM
–

I think comparing your spouse to someone else is poor taste.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/25 04:37 PM
3

I think having sex without getting tested is not reasonable. Ideally, you’d also use barrier methods for the first 6 months, get tested again, and only then consider relying on non-barrier methods.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/25 04:40 AM
2

I think there's not enough data to make broad claims about pre-historic times.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/25 02:49 AM
0

What is your point then? There are both men and women who make very bad decisions...and now what?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/25 02:49 AM
1

I think lions do bring in big game though. They also fight other male lions.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/25 12:36 AM
17

My husband and I started dating as broke teens, and finance wasn’t really something we thought much about. Whoever had money paid for the date. When we started living together, we just treated all money as our money and that’s it. There were periods of time when we were making similar income, time when I was providing for both of us, and now we switched the roles, and he pays most of our bills because I’m studying.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 08:37 PM
–

Pretty much this. Some guys seem to be utterly helpless.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 07:06 PM
–

Russia has very specific gender roles. I'd say men are expected to bring money home, but most women do work, and a situation where a woman brings money home and does most chores and childcare weren't that rare either.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 07:05 PM
1

Russia has very specific gender roles.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 07:03 PM
–

I've recently caught myself on a thought that sometimes I talk to a guy and think that, yeah, dude, you need a woman to take care of you, your life is a mess. I do not have the same thought process talking with women though. I guess coming from a more traditional culture does leave a mark whether you agree with these values or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 06:55 PM
9

I don't think the problem is that women "don't want the bottom 80%". Women want someone compatible and who adds to their life, not just makes it more complicated. On average, women also have lower libido, so they do not feel such a strong need to date someone. The majority of women date "bottom 80%", and there are a lot of content couples. You should take a break from pill-related content and look around yourself. Do you see young people dating at all? I see couples in my college, and I wouldn't…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 06:44 PM
–

You're talking about yourself here, not all family-oriented men out there. Most people who want to have kids realize that kids are expensive, and realistically both parents will have to work, and most likely work a lot. It's good if they can take a break to be with their kids while they're newborns/toddlers, but even this isn't promised or guaranteed. There are women who wouldn't mind being breadwinners, but a) few men and women can realistically support a whole family on their own, b) among tho…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 04:27 PM
3

Does it mean that every male victim of DV or sexual violence or just a guy who is a baby daddy is a testament to men's poor decision making?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 02:34 AM
4

"Natural" as "what you can see in nature". Life-long sexual monogamy is not seen in nature.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 01:46 AM
3

The question isn't what is successful - the question is whether it's natural. Most likely, it isn't natural. It doesn't mean we should reject it, but it explains why without heavy social/economic pressure people do not pursue it by default.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 01:37 AM
–

Yeah, I really enjoyed when husband was doing most chores and cooking. It's really nice not to think about what you have to cook or spend any time on cleaning.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 01:33 AM
8

It's probably serial monogamy, although some tribes don't have any concept of monogamy. I do not argue for the idea that we have to live naturally btw - my point was that marriage isn't something we inherently seek.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 01:31 AM
1

I'm not against marriage as a concept - we largely do not live "naturally" anymore, and it isn't necessarily bad. My point was that we are not hard-wired to seek marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 01:29 AM
1

This is not the definition of marriage. The idea of life-long sexual monogamy doesn't really exist in nature. Humans are social creatures, and we used to live in tribes - it isn't given that we had anything close to nuclear family as we see it now. Some tribes that are still around do not even have the idea of monogamy.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 01:26 AM
25

It isn’t just women. All people live in the environment that is very far away from our “natural habitat”, and the youngsters spend more time online than socializing in real life which is bound to affect their social skills and dating lives. We also have prolonged childhood and youth years, we spend years getting education, and it takes even more time if ever to get to some level of financial stability. Marriage has stopped being necessary (and we could argue that marriage is also far away from o…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/25 02:46 PM
–

Good luck having kids when women aren’t in the boat.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/25 02:41 PM
14

It is not safe. If you're a SAHM, you have no official day-offs, no social security, no pension. Your "working" experience doesn't count to your actual working experience, and it doesn't make you more desirable on a working or dating market - it's pretty much the opposite. If you divorce for whatever reason, you'll find yourself with years of unemployment to deal with. It's easier to find another job rather than another marriage. It is not a desirable relationship dynamic. Normally, you leave yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 09:00 PM
3

Whatever works for them really. I've never had casual, but I see no reason to stop people from enjoying themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 07:46 PM
2

Well, I see a lot of men being angry with women due to women's preferences too. I think people generally do not like feeling excluded whether it makes sense or not, but we all should just...chill a bit.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 07:45 PM
2

I think in the context of casual sex it makes sense to talk about people who do have casual. If a couple has had sex after meeting on a party, but then they started seeing each other, they've started with casual sex anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 07:43 PM
8

Why do you think so?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 07:01 PM
19

I think if a guy is very sexual from the start, it's a good indicator that he seeks something casual, but, from the other hand, people who are open for casual sometimes get into relationships that have started off as a casual encounter. It's more about guy's priorities and his manner of flirting rather than being "relationship material" yourself imv.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 06:54 PM
2

If you find the jokes acceptable, you do not have any reason to distance yourself from friends who joke them. If you don't, it would be a good idea to talk about.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 05:39 PM
3

Sure. As long as a person doesn't insult people who don't fit their standards, I don't really care. I can debate them if they push for it as some objective/reasonable standards, but it's not gendered.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 05:38 PM
0

I think it's closer to supporting toxic masculinity and being an example of toxic femininity when it's perpetuated by women. Sexism is about discrimination on the basis of gender, and what you're describing isn't exactly that imv.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 05:37 PM
18

Because committed romantic relationship is more than sex and having a friend. My husband is my partner, my lover, and my closest friend. I have friends, yes, but I do not plan my life with my friends. We do not live together, we do not want to have kids together, we do not plan to get mortgage together etc. My husband is the person I want to spend my life with. It's not that I want a relationship just for the sake of relationship - I want my husband. Also, I am demisexual. I feel sexual attracti…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 05:14 PM
3

Your friends are the projection of who you are as a person. If you tolerate having rapists, cheaters, abusers etc. in your close social circle, you're tolerant towards their behavior, so you lack morals. It's not about choosing your friends over others - it's about your own morals.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 03:45 PM
3

Can you explain why it is sexism?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 03:43 PM
1

I'm perfectly fine with men having height preferences or a preference for vagina that do make them feel good.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 03:42 PM
1

Men do not like reading stuff like that though, and they start blaming women in the same behavior. Imv, you probably could say the same switching the genders, and this is just the description of online dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 03:38 PM
3

Bodyshaming isn't okay, I agree with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 03:36 PM
1

It depends on the topic of your complaints, but generally when you complain about men/women as a group, you'll get people pushing back against your complaints. Hence, we get "not all men" as a response to women complaining about aggressive/toxic men whether those women claimed that it's "all men" or not. Overall, I'm against blaming men or women as a group for the actions of a few of them. With complaints, I'm not sure what kind of response you expect. I see men complaining about women's standar…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 03:33 PM
1

Even in this scenario, it's clear that women have issues with the minority of men, unless you think that it's the majority of men who make dating unsafe for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 03:28 PM
-3

I'm curious how height or penis size preferences are sexist? These are personal preferences, and they're fine as long as you do not bodyshame people who do not fit your preferences.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 03:23 PM
4

People expose bad behavior not just in romantic relationships. A lot of behavior we deem as negative now were also pretty acceptable in the past, and your parents wouldn't necessarily filter it out.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 03:22 PM
–

Pretty much this. It's really hard to take men's issues seriously when you hear mostly about men's lack of sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 02:23 AM
1

Late bloomers either date their peers or someone younger, but it’s unlikely that someone who has struggled with dating took their 40s will suddenly have success with young folks.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 12:04 AM
–

That’s cheating.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 12:03 AM
–

Ngl I’d be really perplexed if my date asked for me transcripts even though I have basically the equivalent of 4 gpa.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 03:01 PM
1

Well, there's a reason why women tend to use erotica and smut stories as their fuel for fantasies. We need more than a body part or a pretty face or a dick in our face.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 10:17 PM
11

You judge people by yourself, but lots of men are into spending money on things they enjoy that are useless to attract women.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 06:19 PM
–

I’d go with him to pick him up, but I’d expect another day to properly celebrate. Also, a very stern talk to his best friend. If the dude keeps doing this shit, it’s better to cut contact.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 01:31 AM
–

Call the police, sure. We might have avoided the dude though. I prefer not to deal with men who seem to be looking for trouble.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 01:29 AM
–

I think overusing it can lead to temporarily sensitivity loss, but it’s reversible. Some women are also low sensitivity to start with, so vibrators are their only option.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 01:27 AM
–

This sounds horrible, I’m sorry. Have you finished your second course, or are you still taking it?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 09:48 PM
1

What is it supposed to mean? Is her husband a bad person? What?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 05:07 PM
1

Yes and no. I can see how having several mental health issues can affect one's dating and attitude towards themselves, but a lot of people do not have severe mental health problems or a combination of several at once. It also depends on how well you manage your issues.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 05:05 PM
1

I think it's a range. More men are on the side of "just a pretty picture is enough", and there are more women on "I need more than just visuals", but it doesn't mean that there are no men or women on the other side as well. Demisexuality is an extreme case, but a lot of women do need more than a static visual. Hence, most women do not masturbate just to pretty pictures.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 05:01 PM
1

"Complex" as it accounts and relies on more things than just appearance.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 05:00 PM
2

Appearance catches the eye, but you don't necessarily develop attraction to all pretty people out there. Women often need more than that.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 05:00 PM
1

Let me clarify - I'm not into any celebrities, but I can imagine how people do fall for them. I think people who develop crashes to celebrities create a persona in their heads. It's partially based on what they can see on the screen, in interviews etc., but it's also largely a safe fantasy about an ideal partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 04:59 PM
1

It can end, but at least you have higher chances not to be stuck with a partner who doesn't really like you.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 04:58 PM
1

Finding someone visually appealing doesn't mean you're into them. Women who are into famous criminals are into...criminals. I think it's a type of sexual deviation.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 04:57 PM
2

I'm still missing the part explaining how it doesn't make attraction complicated.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 04:56 PM
1

The other person is also a human. If you can love them, why wouldn't they be able to love you? Dealing with your downsides and being aware of them are all parts of being human. We aren't strong on our own, but we can and should create connections with others.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 04:55 PM
–

Do a lot of women really expect men to care? I don't expect much from strangers or people as a group. Empathy in close relationships is reciprocated, but it seems you aren't talking about how we treat our partners or friends. I think we've seen that the whole idea of "he for she" isn't going to work. Feminism has to concentrate on working and educating women in the first place, but we can't really rely on men to support our cause or to vote for our benefit. There are issues that men should be co…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 04:52 PM
1

"There are far more men on the apps than women, so the outcome is pretty understandable. A lot of people are on the apps to waste their and your time, as they seek no real connection, and they just enjoy endless chatting and validation. Do not rely on the apps - go out and meet people in real life".
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 04:47 PM
7

These people aren’t just pretty picture - they have charisma, skills, fame etc. With famous strangers, you also can kinda create parts of them in your own head.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 06:17 AM
–

So you might want to avoid an arranged marriage. It doesn’t mean that marriage between people who have chosen each other and who have dated and lived together for a bit is a bad idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 06:15 AM
–

Arranged marriage is a contract, but you can’t force feelings. Maybe these women thought that the guys were better than they really were.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 05:44 AM
–

Arranged marriages. Why should they like their husbands if they didn’t really want to marry them in the first place?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 05:23 AM
10

I’m not sure where your arguments are for the idea that attraction is not complicated. I think attraction isn’t necessarily complicated, but it is complex. Women often don’t feel any arousal or attraction just from a pretty face - we need more stimuli than that, but it seems for a lot of men just visuals are perfectly fine.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 04:23 AM
–

Why not? I know my downsides, but they don’t seem to repel people from me, and I try to deal with my problems in healthy ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 04:21 AM
–

There are people who hate themselves. I assume they wouldn’t want to date someone with the same traits.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 04:19 AM
1

To be fair, my first major was in English, and, no, even there we had some smelly dudes.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 02:10 AM
–

Once again, I don't think she's a victim. She clearly had much harder life than I do though, and it's true for my grandad as well - but at least he didn't have to spend years pregnant.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 02:08 AM
–

It's not exactly mute when we're discussing the changes. My generation has much more opportunities than my grandma's even when we account for the war the country has started.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 01:09 AM
–

Not necessarily a victim, but our grandmas were bound by their time, society, and norms. My grandma made all her kids to pursue education, and she drove it into her grandkids as well that they should prioritize education and financial security over early marriage and kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 12:41 AM
–

I think there’s a number of women who aren’t fit to be mothers, and they’d be miserable if they had kids. Some already are.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 12:38 AM
–

Or she might not be in the mood for sex, but she doesn’t mind a quick bj.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 12:37 AM
–

These men are still pedos, whether they bd it the bill or not. Whatever they use as an excuse has to be fully dismissed.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 12:34 AM
1

This is not supported by the stats.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 12:31 AM
1

Most women and men do not cheat.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 09:08 PM
1

Okay, so there's nothing to discuss further.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 06:03 PM
1

I think cheating is an indication of a character failure. Whether they were consciously open to it or "it's just happened", it's still on them, and they're still a minority.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 06:00 PM
1

If this is reasonable, then a dinner date is also reasonable. Just filter the ones who aren't into it.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 06:00 PM
1

And I'm saying that it isn't a reasonable standard for a lot of people out there.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 05:57 PM
1

You'll have to filter for women who are open to cheating, and your sample would be much lower as a result.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 05:57 PM
1

The problem is that people aren't products you pay for, and a lot of things we get out of relationships aren't quantifiable.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 05:56 PM
1

Oh, I'm not arguing with that. I think expecting dinner on the first date isn't reasonable. I also think that expecting casual sex from everyone isn't reasonable either.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 05:54 PM
1

What's your major? Math and CS classes often have at least one smelly dude.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 05:10 PM
1

The problem here isn’t in your past behavior - it’s whether or not I’m satisfied with what you’re giving me.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 05:06 PM
2

I was taking more about valuing things like companionship, partnership, deep bonds etc. I’ve never had casual myself, but I can see how some people might enjoy casual and enjoy an LTR.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 05:06 PM
1

I’m not saying your approach doesn’t work for anyone - it’s just not universal.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 05:05 PM
1

Same answer.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 05:04 PM
–

I wonder whether they had any chemistry from the beginning and whether they actually do have any orgasms. My husband and I have been together for more than 11 years now, and sex life is still active, but I don’t have to make myself have sex when I don’t want to! A few kisses and I’m usually in the mood.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 05:01 PM
1

The idea that by not sleeping with a guy without a date, you universally treat them force seems rather silly to me. Maybe a woman was drunk when she had casual. She doesn’t drink that much anymore, so she won’t engage in casual with you. Maybe her casual partner was her FWB she’s known for a long time prior to being intimate - but she met you off the app, so she needs time to get to know you. I’m theorizing here because I’ve never had casual myself. I don’t view sex as “the best thing” my husban…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 04:48 PM
–

To be fair, most married women I know dated guys kinda similar to their husbands. I haven’t seen huge jumps. I just married my first boyfriend, but that’s an extreme.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 04:44 AM
11

It depends on what you value and what you care. It might be hard to believe, but there are people who value things outside of sex too.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 10:13 PM
4

It depends on what you value and what you care. It might be hard to believe, but there are people who value things outside of sex too.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 10:13 PM
3

Marriage and kids aren’t seen as default option that everyone should pursue. You could call it devaluation in a way, but I don’t think it’s necessarily a bad thing. A lot of people aren’t cut out for marriage or kids. It’s not that there are no reasons to get married - they’re just not universal.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 10:11 PM
–

I'd really enjoy going on a trip with some of my friends. We don't drink, but we'd walk a lot, visit all local art galleries, try different food, and spend a few days on the beach.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 08:51 PM
–

I better go volunteer in an animal shelter again. Cleaning after cats and dogs or feeding them doesn't violate my bodily autonomy or my fidelity.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 08:50 PM
5

Marriage has stopped being a goal on its own. It's great with the right person, but in the past it wasn't about spending your life with your best friend - it was a necessary step of adulthood, and being married was important whether your partner was your friend or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 08:49 PM
1

Spending some time together is the only option. You can't know a lot of things for sure when you're dealing with people.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 08:45 PM
2

There's no need to get married anymore. As there's no need and more people share their poor experience, more people question the idea of marriage and kids. A lot of men and women just aren't cut out for marriage. The idea that men generally don't want to get married and they have to be pushed/tricked/lured into marriage is also pretty common, and...why should women bother? I'm saying that as a married woman - I got married not because I wanted to be married, but because I met the right person an…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 08:34 PM
2

It is counterproductive because if you filter for partners who do have casual, you have no chances to meet someone with compatible values.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 08:20 PM
2

Sure, but if you want to find someone with compatible views and you aren't into casual, filtering for people who are willing to have casual with you is counterproductive.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 07:45 PM
3

How early are we talking about? I think waiting for a few weeks is reasonable, especially if you're on a younger/less experienced side.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 07:44 PM
2

For reasons I've already listed. Some women have never had casual, some men want to avoid women who did have casual, some men cannot go only for a minority of women who regularly have casual, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 07:19 PM
11

You give general advice though, and I'm saying that it doesn't make sense for a lot of men out there.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 07:12 PM
8

It depends on what you view as "the best" I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 07:04 PM
13

The measure "even one time" doesn't make much sense though. If she tried it and didn't like it, why would you expect her to keep having it? Also, viewing dating as efforts just to get sex...do men not want to have an LTR or enjoy other aspects of relationships? There also are women who have never had casual. If a man is not into casual himself, it makes no sense for him to filter them out.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 07:03 PM
8

If their goal is casual, sure, but if they’re looking for an LTR, that’s counterproductive. Moreover, casual isn’t available for a lot of men to start with. Whatever you might think, a lot of women aren’t into casual.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 06:16 PM
21

Do you think it’s realistic for all men out there expect to have casual with any date they have?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 06:07 PM
47

How many women actually expect an expensive dinner for the first date? I'd see it as a red flag. From the other hand, the idea "best deal or no deal" doesn't make much sense when you're dealing with individuals. You do not know "the best deal" for your particular date, and putting unrealistic expectations won't help you with your dating prospects.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 05:57 PM
1

Depends on your social circle, but it's not uncommon in college setting to have a few guys who stink a whole room. I have no idea how they can be so oblivious to their own smell. Some people do take showers, but they barely ever wash their clothes, and this is just as bad as not showering.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 05:55 PM
–

Well, all women you've dated also have another common trait among them - they dated you. You might have a specific taste without realizing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 05:11 PM
–

Haven't you just said that they also didn't achieve their goals? That's another thing in common.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 04:36 PM
–

You two are waiting till marriage, and you’re from a conservative religious background. Marrying early makes sense for you. My husband and I married at 21 btw. We aren’t religious or conservative though, we just started dating at 16.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 03:56 PM
–

You’ve been dating some very passive women.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 03:55 PM
–

Do you think you have no power over your emotions at all?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 10:51 AM
–

Let’s be glad that we don’t have to marry for familial contracts or political alliances anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 10:45 AM
1

Life is unfair, but we’re already alive, so we can try to get the best out of it. Being resentful doesn’t really change anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/25 09:39 PM
4

I get what she’s talking about - and I’m bi, but it works the same way with men or women for me. I can look at a person and find them pretty, but it doesn’t do anything for me romantically. Just looks isn’t enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/25 04:27 PM
–

If they were the same things, I wouldn’t list all of them.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/25 02:52 PM
3

Whatever changes have happened weren’t the result of marriage. I’ve put on a bit of weight - and it’s a good thing, as I’m still underweight, and it isn’t great health-wise. We argue far less, as we’ve learnt a lot about each other’a needs and communication style. Sex frequency hasn’t changed much since our 2-3d year of living together, but it does depend on our free time which it did even back then.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/25 02:51 PM
5

I really doubt that marriages changed people that much. If you cohabitate for a few years, all the changes are supposed to happen during that period. My husband and I married after 4 years of dating, 3 of which we lived together. It didn’t really change anything besides our families viewing us as a family unit now and having legal protection.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/25 12:44 PM
3

I think marriage is risky for both men and women, and having marriage as your goal might be counterproductive. If you meet the right partner, it is worth the risks though, but that’s a big if. Also, you have to be the right partner yourself, and not all people are cut out for long-term commitment. To add to your point about single men, I think especially as men age, they require someone to take care of them. I have a single uncle in his 70s, and he’s basically his sisters’ responsibility, as he …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/25 12:14 PM
–

Well, there are a lot of men abandoning their kids as it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/25 11:57 AM
5

I think a lot of people value the existing bond and shared experience over a better physical appearance of a new partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 07:59 AM
9

To a degree, as we heavily rely on appearance to make our first impression of a person and judge whether they're safe, better to be avoided etc. If a person looks mentally unwell, drunk, under drugs, they're very dirty/smelly, I will treat them differently from other strangers. I'm sure I have some level for looks for romantic relationships - I wouldn't date someone who I found totally unappealing, but I also feel no attraction based purely on appearance. I don't think I react differently to guy…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 04:37 AM
1

I think a good share of casual sex happens when participants are intoxicated. I'm not sure how pleasurable it is for them though.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 03:56 AM
1

Women have even lower motivation to discuss paper abortions when medical abortions are getting banned. Expecting them to get on board at this moment is just unrealistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 03:56 AM
4

Sorry it took me long to reply! As I've said, I don't think that paper abortions are a realistic option for men. I really doubt we'll see any country implementing it any time soon, and there are several reasons for that. a) I think the main reason is that no state is interested in creating more children that will require welfare, or implementing any policies that might discourage women from birthing kids when birth rates have been plummeting as it is. b) It's hard to implement in a way that make…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 03:54 AM
1

No, I'm saying that abortion bans endanger women's health and lives. It isn't just about choice - it's about doctors' practices, and how states with abortion bans get multiple stories about preventable complications and deaths. Overall, I don't think that fetus's rights should trump women's rights. No human being should be allowed to use other person's body without their consent whether they die without this access or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 03:45 AM
1

I support paper abortions at least in theory because it's logically consistent. Consent to sex doesn't mean consent to parenthood, and it should work this way for both genders. I also think that it isn't a realistic option. Men have better chances to get some alternative form of contraception before they get any form of paper abortions.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 03:43 AM
1

Pickme woman is a woman who is insecure and her only/main source of validation is men's attention. She doesn't necessarily tell you to pick her, she exposes this behavior for any guy who might be slightly interested in her, and there's no guarantee she'd be loyal if she does get picked. This sub used to have an extreme example of a pickme - she was bragging about banging her husband's friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 03:42 AM
–

"Normies" don't have to think much to get along with others, yes. It comes naturally to them. People who either want to manipulate others or who have to intentionally come off as likeable have to put in mote efforts.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 03:41 AM
1

It's a very rude simplification, but let's say that there are "points" for whatever things you're bringing to the table. A lot of men here claim that women score enough points to qualify to play just because of their sex appeal, i.e. their bodies. It doesn't mean that bringing anything extra doesn't increase your value though.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 03:40 AM
1

It's a compatibility thing, but it's also morality thing for me. I wouldn't date someone pro-life, and if I was a man, I'd be even more concerned. You don't want your partner to refuse terminate pregnancy that can potentially kill them or that would lead to a baby that won't survive for long.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 03:38 AM
1

People who have more choice tend to become pickier, but I'm really not sure that "insane standards" are that common outside of apps/social medias.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 03:38 AM
–

How to say that I wouldn't use it to encourage someone to kill another person or to kill someone myself? I have no issues that some people are better dead though.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 03:37 AM
3

You’d probably get along well with some ND women.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/25 03:25 PM
2

That's interesting, can you link the source? Even if it's true, "have participated" doesn't mean doing it on a regular basis.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/25 01:17 PM
12

There are share standards, and there are standards unique to men or women. If men value women just for their bodies, this is the reflection of men. It also gives women more bargaining power, and it gives them even more value when they provide something else.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/25 07:36 AM
12

You seem to have a very egg negative perception of women and very positive perception of men. In reality, both men and women bring something to the table - and they have to bring enough to get a partner and keep them interested. If you’re stuck with a partner who doesn’t make it worth, you either struggle with getting, or it might reflect your own value, as better partners filter you out.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/25 07:31 AM
2

First of all, I don’t really think it’s “top” - it’s just a small percent of people. Being attractive does help, but the details can be pretty different. There’s also the question of compatibility. Secondly, most people don’t really have that many good options. Good compatibility is hard to find, bd endlessly swiping online just makes it harder to build a real connection.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/25 07:29 AM
0

He looks way older than 24, and women his age probably just aren't into him. He should lose weight.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/25 04:39 AM
3

Drinking occasionally is fine, smoking isn't. No.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/25 03:57 AM
2

Neutral can turn to attractive if you get to know them closer, and I think it's a fallacy to think that all women's "top 20" has basically all the same men. I think there was a study showing that women generally have harder times on agreeing which men is attractive. Anecdotal experience, but my friends and I usually do not share visual and some other preferences.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/25 02:19 AM
1

I barely slept today.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/25 02:04 AM
3

I’m fine. The best thing some people can do for others is to die. It’s very unfortunate, and it’s pretty rare, and I wouldn’t use it to justify actually killing anyone, but I don’t have problems acknowledging that. One of my school friends used to joke that the best thing her dad had done for her is that he died early. He was a deadbeat not paying child support, but when he died, she started getting welfare from the state.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 11:43 PM
5

Eh, it'd probably be better if he got killed in the jail.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 11:13 PM
1

Dude, at this point I have no idea what you're talking about. Can you answer your own question first?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 11:05 PM
1

I’d have to look it up, but I’m pretty sure all European countries have birth rate below 2. Higher than 1 though.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 08:11 PM
1

I think below 2. Countries that still have birth rate above 2 are either slowing down, or their rates have started decreasing too. Women and men do not want to have a bunch of children when they can choose not to. What does it mean “women like you” though?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 07:49 PM
8

Whatever he does, he has no chances unless I'm single and we have the chance to hang out in some social situation from time to time, i.e. we work or study together, we walk our dogs in the same park, he's a friend of my friend etc. I wouldn't date a total stranger.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 07:35 PM
14

Ideally, you should have posted it as a debate because you make an affirmative claim "women more likely than men want to date and marry for convenience and comfort". You are yet to prove it. So, I disagree with your premise. I don't think we can claim that women date for things that aren't love more often than men do. Sugar babies have sugar daddies, gold diggers often date men who are perfectly aware about the expected exchange and they're okay with it etc. Basically, women who exchange sex for…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 07:33 PM
1

No, I think people get a boost to their libido in the beginning of relationships, and due to this boost women might experience spontaneous desire more often. It goes down with time, so if responsive desire is her norm, it will return back to that however good the guy looks like. Responsive desire doesn't mean a lack of enthusiasm btw. It means you rarely get horny out of nowhere.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 07:25 PM
0

I do. You get hormone rash in the beginning, but it is bound to go back to normal over time. Our bodies cannot keep producing them at this rate forever.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 07:00 PM
2

Thanks!
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 06:59 PM
1

Most nations are declining or starting to decline. When women have the choice not to pop out a kid every other year, they choose not to.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 06:59 PM
2

I don’t think I’m an exception though - looking at couples around me and stuff online, it seems men want much more than just cleaning and sandwiches.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 06:11 PM
2

Is a red flag if she doesn’t want any.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 05:48 PM
1

You two are cute, and we want to see another PPD member wedding.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 05:48 PM
1

I’m not describing one type of women here though.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 05:47 PM
3

These women are usually insecure and validation-seeking. Your attention might not be enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 05:47 PM
0

Husband gets and expects much more than that.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 05:45 PM
2

Clit has its own “foreskin”. Zair, I hope you’ll be able to please your gf when the time comes.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 05:44 PM
2

It’s especially funny considering that he does not, in fact, decide when he’s done. He just gets banned.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 05:43 PM
0

Well, being yourself does work for some. If you struggle, your “yourself” probably needs some work to do to come off more attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 05:41 PM
1

They pierce the hood of it, skin around, not the clit itself.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 05:39 PM
1

Over time, yes, if that’s her norm.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 05:37 PM
5

I don’t think these things are universal, but these are what I’d be cautious of.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 09:16 AM
1

Sure, but you've asked how young I was.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 08:20 AM
18

History of cheating or abuse where she was the perpetrator "All my exes were abusive/all my exes are cheaters/all my exes sucked" Drinks a lot or does drugs Smokes Expects fancy dates from the go Expects expensive gifts while not being generous herself Poor communication: silent treatment, can't express her feelings, can't say when something is bothering her, throws screaming tantrums etc. Deeply religious Pro-life/right-wing/pick-me/HATE ALL MEN kind of "feminist"/homophobic Doesn't like pets o…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 07:49 AM
2

Do you realize that your relatives visited another country? Modern Russia is different from the Soviet Union although we do have some leftovers. Also, your social medias are fucked up if you don't know about Russian people being oppressed by our government. Where are you from? Russia is terrible, and they're killing both Ukrainian people and Russian men. No elections - we all know who is going to win because even if he doesn't win by real numbers, they're gonna draw him the desired numbers. Peop…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 07:43 AM
6

If you think that getting jailed for a peaceful protest or a comment you life somewhere is "much safer and better than liberal countries", you really really should reevaluate your standards. You also most likely no nothing about 90s in Russia when gangs could kill you or your family members...just because. Dude, just admit that you have no idea what you're talking about.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 07:03 AM
6

Russia dooming its own population has nothing to with “Western women” to start with. The war is the result of actions of a few men in power who want to stay in power. Considering gender roles, Russia is somewhat more traditional than the UK or Germany. Although during the Soviet Union, most women worked, chores and childcare were still on them. It’s got better since then, but the general expectation still leans heavily to women doing more around the house even when they work full time. The attit…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 05:49 AM
2

I’ve given her advice before - if she hasn’t got HOV vaccine, she should now.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 05:30 AM
2

She’s a teenager. Break ups are fairly normal.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 05:29 AM
2

Breaking up with a long-term partner is worse than just your casual fling ending. At least I’d guess so having no experience with the latter.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 05:24 AM
13

Culturally, Russia is really different from England or the US. I’m saying it as a person born in Russia and who spend most of her life there. Russia is very backwards, and their views on gender role and feminism aren’t your mainstream Reddit.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 03:48 AM
15

I think men have much higher chances to get some other form of male contraception rather than to get paper abortion legalized. It’s not just women - no state is interested in creating more kids who need welfare or to risk getting their already low birth rates even lower. Abortions are about women’s safety and lives.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 01:34 AM
5

I’m not talking about the overall percent - there’s an increase in states with abortion bans, and, yes, in pure numbers it’s not a lot of women. Still, these are totally preventable tragedies.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 01:33 AM
1

The idea is to give men the choice to opt out from legal responsibilities for a kid. It doesn’t change anything what I’ve already said though.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 01:30 AM
41

I do support paper abortions, but I think restricting access to medical abortions creates higher incentive for women to be either adamantly against paper ones or being indifferent to them because they aren't their first concern. When you have the risk of dying due to a lack of medical care, men's risks of paying child support fade in comparison.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 12:48 AM
1

You should discuss that beforehand with your partner. Cheating is one of the most common divorce reasons. I think children are better off with separated parents instead of parents that have no respect for each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 10:01 PM
1

I warned about it - I do not accept cheating, kids or no kids. He knows about this, so it's on him at this point. I'm pretty sure he wont' cheat though because he thinks all cheaters are scum. I'd actually want to teach our kids that cheating is unacceptable.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 09:54 PM
2

If we divorce due to his cheating, that's on him. My husband and I discussed it when we started dating - cheating is immediate break up, so it's not that I didn't give a warning.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 09:49 PM
1

It's okay if they agreed on open marriage or she doesn't really care about him. In other cases, this is going to lead to major relationship issues. If I get cheated on, I'm seeking divorce and no contact.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 09:44 PM
1

Can you quote where they said that women don't want to have sex at all?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 09:01 PM
5

How should people express that in your view?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 08:59 PM
1

Are you Workaholico? Or a user with some similar name
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 07:14 PM
1

Lol, no.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 05:30 PM
2

The idea under "it doesn't matter what you wear" isn't to stop taking any precautions - it's to stop putting blame on victims. It is the fact that certain men will sexually harass or try to rape you whatever you're wearing. The whole discussion of "what were you wearing" just takes off the light from harassers. Only a small percent of rapists gets jailed, and a lot of cases of sexual harassment do not get any traction whatsoever. We can't just teach kids that they'll get into jail if they rape s…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 05:12 PM
1

Women and men's sexualities are different, and men's sexuality isn't the "default heterosexual". Having lower libido and higher standards doesn't make you gay.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 05:00 PM
2

We do get certain benefits from our sexuality, but a lot of us aren’t into oversexualizing themselves of capitalizing it. It comes with a higher risks of sexual harassment and rape, and you get exposed it way before you even develop your sexuality or can enjoy it.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 04:21 PM
3

I don’t like men or women as groups of people - I like individuals. My husband is a great person. I like spending time with him, he’s caring and supportive. He’s an attentive lover. He knows me better than anyone else, and he’s the only person I don’t get tired spending time with. I have a few close male friends - mostly older married guys with kids. We have some hobbies and interests in common and they care for me. Yes, I have had some awful experience with men harassing me, but they were mostl…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 04:57 AM
1

TRP is far more than what you describe as three pillars.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 06:26 PM
–

No, like doing other intimate stuff.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 05:58 PM
52

Some of common beliefs and talking points are misogynistic: Women are the eldest teenager in the house Describing their casual partners as "plates" "Never trust a woman" Women are often viewed as inferior to men etc. It also comes from interactions with men who are red-pilled here. A lot of them are utterly bitter and angry with women, and it shows in their comments and posts. Some of them do not believe women are "fully human" - they think women have no empathy, or they view women mostly as sex…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 05:56 PM
–

Not an issue when you're taking breaks to do some other fun stuff. Hours-long sessions do not mean hours-long penetration.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 05:35 PM
1

So it can be both, and a person who believes that personality and looks both matter isn't necessarily red-pilled. I'm not going to watch a video. You're free to summarize it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 05:04 PM
1

It’s enough to see this heartbreak once.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 01:29 PM
–

PE?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 12:05 PM
1

Okay, good luck. I didn’t know there still were things that can make me blush. Agar agar eggs into an ass apparently can.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 05:21 AM
38

I don’t see why men have to pay for dates I have no issues with bi guys I don’t get the obsession with super tall guys I’ve never looked for a provider Men have their own issues that we have to address
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 05:21 AM
–

I’ve googled a bit. Agar agar melting point is over 85C. Your ass can’t be hotter than 40C 🥲 Gelatin does melt from body heat though.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 05:19 AM
1

Agar agar melting point 35C-45C. Body temperature is around 36.6C. I hope you’re safe 🥲
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 05:17 AM
–

…I’m gonna cry here. Why do you want to shove eggs into your ass? Why not use anal beads or something? Are you sure agar agar eggs gonna melt? I’m
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 05:12 AM
–

I…I need some context here, girl. Shove where? Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 05:00 AM
–

I saw your comment about staying fit - works as long as you’re not old or sick. I didn’t include it because I’m still underweight.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 04:47 AM
2

I love Madoka. Most likely, I’ll never rewatch it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 04:45 AM
–

Are you asking for bare minimum for men or women? I think bare minimum includes stuff that is needed to keep relationship going, so it is pretty demanding on its own. Anything extra, things that you can get by without much harm to your relationship, is extra. Some practical examples from my marriage: Bare minimum for chores - our place is decently clean, we have clean dishes and clothes to wear, the floors aren’t sticky. Above bare minimum - well, everything is clean and organized. Bare minimum …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 04:41 AM
1

Are you asking for bare minimum for men or women? I think bare minimum includes stuff that is needed to keep relationship going, so it is pretty demanding on its own. Anything extra, things that you can get by without much harm to your relationship, is extra. Bare minimum is at least partially a lack of red flags and bongs destroying relationship on the spot or shortly after. No cheating, no flirting with other people, no abuse, no violence towards your partner, no gaslighting etc. It’s pretty e…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 04:30 AM
1

It's common sense first, and then it's redpill. It isn't the only part of redpill though, so some people can believe that both appearance and personality matter (most people really) without being red-pilled.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 01:02 AM
2

Depends on a woman, but I do think that money doesn't create attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 09:30 PM
2

Both appearance and personality matter in dating. It isn't TRP to admit that, and TRP doesn't have the copyright for common sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 09:28 PM
4

There might be some exceptions, but I'd be curious to talk to them. Tolerating someone for money isn't the same as feeling genuine attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 09:14 PM
4

A woman can feel attraction to you and still want to get expensive gifts, or she can tolerate you and use you for money. Money do not create attraction on their own though.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 09:05 PM
–

I think it’s less about men overall and more about individual men having chances. I’m a bit surprised to learn that a lot of women feel nothing before a man flirts with them though.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 08:41 PM
27

That doesn’t work this way. If I’m not into a guy, having more money won’t help to build attraction. I need emotional connection and enjoy their smell to feel anything romantic/sexual, so money…isn’t going to cut it.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 08:16 PM
–

Can you give an example?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 07:18 PM
–

Husband pays for my education, but I joke that he’s investing.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 06:12 PM
–

Either a style piece or they have fucked up legs.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 06:11 PM
–

This is the crux basically. It's very context-dependent, and you do need some level of selfishness. Women are okay with their partners finding them sexually appealing - as long as it isn't the only thing they find appealing about them. Although, even your partner can be too much over you, and it can become bothersome if he rubs his sexuality straight into your face 24/7.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 06:07 PM
–

I do think that some level of selfishness is needed. You can't go around trying not to offend anyone or cause any discomfort - to get yours, you will have to make some people uncomfortable, but you need balance and knowing when you should stop. You've also ignored everything about the context.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 06:04 PM
36

I don't think it's possible to balance it out, and, frankly, women have zero interest doing so. On average, women have lower libido, women carry worse risks of catching STDs, and much higher risks associated with pregnancy. Statistically, casual sex isn't very pleasurable for women either. The risks are too high for something you might not even enjoy.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 05:55 PM
–

It's context-driven. A person can be into you and don't view you just a nice piece of meat to fuck. Casual sex isn't necessarily dehumanizing - it depends on the attitude and experience. A man who wants to fuck you and please you is very different from a guy who just wants to use you as a hole. There's also different time and place. If you're going out and drinking, it's understandable that men approach you. All fair game as long as they're respectful to your "no" and aren't predatory. Your male…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 05:45 PM
–

I'd say that matches are a form of cold approaches. If it works for you, great, but from what I see online, it doesn't work for a lot of people.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 04:43 PM
–

Cold approaches are usually unsuccessful, but if you can’t do soft approaches, your chances to date as a man are pretty low.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 04:12 PM
0

This post is the continuation of his other post where he talks about women rewarding men with sex for their bad behavior. In this context, I think "reward" isn't a synonym for incentive here. By internal I meant that it's their own motivation, it isn't something that others have to convince them to do. For men sex is internal motivation.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 03:08 PM
1

No, I don't flirt with others, and I expect my husband not to flirt with other people either. I see it as cheating. Friendly interactions are fine, but going out alone with a new man/woman you've recently met would make both of us uncomfortable. Neither of us drinks much and we aren't really into clubs. I usually don't drink without my husband - I have very low tolerance towards alcohol. We both drink very rarely.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 03:05 PM
2

You should cut contact and go to the police. She's a psycho.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 01:03 AM
2

Why…why are you still in contact?!
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 12:55 AM
2

Your ex is a horrible human being. She also sounds like she has some deep mental health issues.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 12:54 AM
3

It’s okay. I still need some distractions.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 12:24 AM
2

Have been for awhile now.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 12:01 AM
–

My sample is very small. Visually they have little in common - one is a woman, my husband is tall and has pretty masculine with some softness in them , my school crush was middle height with silly brows. They’re pretty different personality wise as well, but they’re all kind, supportive, we’ve had emotional connection, and I’ve felt safe and secure with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 10:14 PM
1

“Higher chances” are okay, but the discussion of “women reward men for bad behavior and don’t give good guys incentive” isn’t about higher chances. Women cannot play as men’s carrots to keep them good.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 10:08 PM
1

This post is continuation of his previous post taking about women rewarding men.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 10:04 PM
2

Looks-related posts should go to the looks thread.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 10:03 PM
–

I think someone asked why he is dating her in the first place, but I get the point.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 10:03 PM
10

It usually pops up in the context of “women reward men for bad behavior!” You might see some in the OP’s post history.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 06:44 PM
1

Awards have to be intentional, otherwise, it’s just a consequence. Overall, the whole problem here is the idea that “if I do this and that or have this and that quality, women should have sex with me”. Sex doesn’t work this way.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 06:38 PM
1

This is low effort and unrelated to PPD.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 06:36 PM
1

I know that they do - I disagree with them. I’ve explained it multiple times - women aren’t giving sex as an award. This is a wrapped perception of sex
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 05:33 PM
–

DEBATE FLAIR + AN AFFIRMATIVE SENTENCE IN THE TITLE DISCUSSION FLAIR + QUESTION IN THE TITLE AND NEUTRAL POST
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 04:43 PM
–

I’d guess women in their 30s who are virgins aren’t that eager to date anyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 04:41 PM
–

The older you are, the less chances you have. It really depends on your social circle though.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 04:40 PM
–

Husband (back then he was my boyfriend) has changed his mind. I can see now that my friends and him are not compatible, so it most likely wouldn’t work out.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 04:38 PM
1

If you want to use the ward award, yes, we’re gonna argue about it. This whole post is asking exactly about this. Women have sex with people that they have mutual attraction with if it makes sense at the given time. Some people might not be interested in dating at the moment, and they’ll pass a person who they feel the spark with. A lot of people are in relationships, and they’ll ignore their attraction to others etc. What is attractive depends on a woman, but there are some common things like a…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 04:38 PM
–

Yep. Have never really dated a woman, but had feelings for one of my friends. We were this close to try going polyamorous with three of us.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 04:25 PM
1

Again, reward implies intention. You reward your dog for a trick, you reward a kid for behaving well or some achievement etc. Women do not give sex as a reward for good behavior like some kind of cookies! Some women do that to their partners - and that’s viewed very negatively, but women as a group are not responsible for motivating men to behave well by being intimate with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:44 PM
–

Exactly. They need content, and they have to show how hard they work as trad wives.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:17 PM
2

Sure. It just leads to further radicalization.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:16 PM
–

I’m bi. If I ever become single, I’m gonna date women to see how different it is, but beyond some vague curiosity and appreciation of women around me there’s nothing else. I don’t feel any burning desire to go and fuck a woman. It’s the same with men as a group. I’ve ever been only with my husband, but I have no desire to be intimate with anyone else. To answer your question, I don’t see much of a difference. My husband and I can both appreciate a beautiful woman, but neither expresses some deep…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:16 PM
2

I understand what they’re trying to communicate - I disagree with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:10 PM
–

I’ve seen a short with a woman waking up at 2 or 3 am to get his clothes out of the dryer, make breakfast and pack his lunch. I have no idea why she can’t do these things in the evening. Some people like doing things the hard way I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:10 PM
–

I got the ick just from the quoted part lol. Unless she’s a teenager, this is not normal. Comments give good advice and bring up that he can’t solve it for her.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:07 PM
–

Just pack the lunch the evening before. When husband has long hours, I prepare dinner in a way so he’d have some for breakfast and packed lunch for tomorrow.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:05 PM
2

Sure, but it does happen with a lot of social movements and groups out there. People ridicule vegans, environmentalists etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:04 PM
2

Do you think I’m nitpicking here? My main point is that viewing sex as a reward turns sex into something you’re owed for your achievements or good behavior. Other people do not have the obligation to “award” you this way, as sex is a mutually pleasurable activity, not a carrot to dangle in front of men to turn them into good boys.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:03 PM
3

I’m not sure how you’ve managed to misinterpret it this way. Incentive here is motivation - it’s internal. Men want to have sex regardless of what women are doing, but women have no obligation to fulfill contract they’ve this desire. People date and have sex because they want it. You have to find a person who finds you attractive and compatible. They aren’t rewarding you - you’re pursuing cook interests, as you’re both into each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:02 PM
0

Do you know the definition of incentive? It’s a synonym of motivation - you decide yourself whether you have it or not, as it’s largely internal. These men aren’t owned sex just because they have this incentive though. I think you’d be charged with a different crime than if you intentionally killed someone. Women not dating men aren’t firing guns.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:00 PM
12

Because most examples of awards are one-sided. If you win Nobel prize, you don’t give it to the committee. Hence, it’s not explicitly stated which is different from most other awards. Men want to have this covert contract obliging women to give them relationships or sex, but women have no obligation to fulfill contract they’ve never agreed to. Men getting angry because they put in efforts and aren’t “rewarded” can’t hold covert contact above women’s heads.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 02:57 PM
1

Again, incel is a synonym to a misogynist now. You can be in a relationship and still get called an incel.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 02:56 PM
1

It does look like that, but people are inherently tribalistic. Social medias do make it worse though.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 02:55 PM
1

I don’t think people generalize incel stereotype on all struggling men - it’s just a synonym to a misogynist now. You can be called an incel even when you’re actively dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 02:55 PM
1

They do. I think feminism struggles more than it has to because some women hide their misandry behind the label of feminism, and others are too lenient to call them out.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 02:54 PM
1

So…can you do math yourself here or do you need help?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 02:53 PM
5

I think domestic abuse against men shouldn’t be taken lightly. It’s still abuse, and a person can harm and kill you without being stronger.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 12:32 PM
1

Source? “Why” here is interesting, and I wonder how many women would have this fantasy if none of us was raped or sexually harassed, and we didn’t have to deal with this threat.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 11:29 AM
1

It isn’t possible to count that in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 08:32 AM
22

Reward is one-sided, not mutual, and the deal is usually stated explicitly. I don’t know about you, but I’ve never told another person that if they seduce me, I’ll have sex with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 07:47 AM
7

Yes, because words have meanings. Reward implies intention. Women and men do not have this agreement “do this and get sex!” for men to view sex as a reward they deserved.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 07:46 AM
2

They should make better choices - but they probably won’t. Neither will men who have the same issues. Some will learn and do better with more experience, some will stay this way forever.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 07:45 AM
10

Reward implies that someone intentionally gives it to you upon achieving something. What you’re talking about is incentive.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 07:44 AM
4

You should use the word incentive then because it makes much more sense. Men should take accountability for their own behavior as well. If they make poor choices due to their lust - it’s on them. Poor dating choices are people’s responsibility as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 07:39 AM
10

Using the word incentive here would make much more sense. Reward implies that the giver is intentional about rewarding someone. Most people do not view having sex as them rewarding their partner though - they have sex because they want it. It’s mostly men who use sex as their strong internal incentive.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 07:38 AM
4

Some women date terrible men. Some men date terrible women. Neither fact turns sex into a reward though, this is just human behavior. Lots of people are utterly stupid and can’t make proper decisions for themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 07:35 AM
11

You’re confusing general cause and effect with rewarding something. Rewards is expected. You get it for accomplishing something, and it’s usually clear what exactly you have to accomplish and what you’ll get in return. Sex doesn’t work this way - you can go to the gym, flirt with someone, and still get rejected.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 07:33 AM
3

I think incels who post about mass shooters, their fantasies about raping women, and who are generally hateful towards everyone created a really bad reputation for a whole group. At this point, this word is just a synonym for a misogynist.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 07:32 AM
36

Reward implies that there’s some kind of agreement between two parties: the one receiving the reward and the one giving it. Upon fulfilling the requirement, you get the reward you deserve. Sex doesn’t work this way. There’s no agreement between men and women as groups of people that if men do something, women have to provide them with their “reward” they deserved. Basically, men who view sex as their rewards have covert contract and then get angry with women for not fulfilling the contract women…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 07:29 AM
7

Reward and once the are two different words. Incentive can be internal - like motivation. Reward is a a result of some kind of contract where both sides know what has to be done to deserve it. Men who seem to view sex as a reward think that women owe them sex for “good behavior”, but it simply doesn’t work this way.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 07:24 AM
3

Yes, because these women and sex with them aren't the prize to start with, and men who they choose to date don't behave this way to win them. These are troubled people who associate with each other due to various reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:09 AM
2

Reward is different from incentive. Incentive can be internal, but a reward is something given to you that you have to deserve by doing some work.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 01:50 AM
1

Minimal amount needed for everyday life and work. I know that our gadgets a) made with pretty much slavery and b) destroy our environment. Both my husband and I use what we have as long as we can, doing some repairs when it's needed.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 01:36 AM
2

Intentions and motivation do matter. If you view sex as a reward, you feel denied something you deserve. Sex isn't a reward though - it's the activity people do when they're into each other. You can't deserve it.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 01:31 AM
1

Oh, dear, this is not a stolen valor situation - you did have a drinking problem. You're doing great by abstaining from alcohol.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 01:15 AM
1

Unless you live in climate that requires you to wear fur, fur is a cruel and unnecessary luxury item that people should be shamed for buying.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 12:58 AM
3

If you interpret something as a reward, it doesn't mean that the other party has engaged with you to reward you. You're misinterpreting the intentions here, and this attitude won't help long-term.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 12:57 AM
3

I wonder how many people really say "I'm attracted to this shitty person". We do condemn for pursuing bad partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 12:56 AM
6

"Work don't care about good behavior"? Attraction is built partially on behavior, but being a good person doesn't necessarily cause attraction. It's similar with men although they're hornier.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 12:55 AM
3

You do realize that there's a limited number of "upper middle class men"? Not all of them are good partners either.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 10:28 PM
1

You're stronger than me. I need a break after a few consecutive days of sex because it starts to hurt. We do have an active sex life, and we've been together for more than 11 years now. I think having no kids helps with intimacy though.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 10:15 PM
1

There are far more men on the apps, and they're more eager to meet women. It's not surprising women have more choices.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 10:10 PM
1

My new friend has been showing me her matches - all decent guys, but they're far from Chads men here worship. Asian/mixed guys from 5'7 to 6'. Not gym gods.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 09:50 PM
2

Men and women don't need each other on an individual level. A lot of us date out of curiosity and desire, not need. When you've spent a lot of time with your partner, their presence might feel as a need, but it's different from the initial stage.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 09:04 PM
3

I've gone through this thread, and I removed your comment, yes. Your first comment there was okay, but you were pushing too hard, and if it was gender-reversed, I'd remove it too. You can drive your point without insulting other users.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 09:02 PM
3

It's not a question of excuses really, but you as a 3d party shouldn't feel personally responsible for them after offering help and them not using it. You can compare it to an eating disorder - a person knows it can kill them eventually, but fighting it off is really really hard. A lot of people do not manage it. It's their responsibility to help themselves, but it isn't their fault. It's different for abusers, of course, as it is their fault. Also, "I'm attracted to whom I'm attracted to" doesn…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 09:01 PM
3

What?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 08:58 PM
3

If you're interested in the topic, you might want to read more about it. The whole issue with abusive relationship isn't that victims are unaware about the signs (although some can be unaware, sure), but the way abusers choose and tie their victims to themselves. It's a mental health issue on both sides. Also, the majority of women do not have this experience. The ones who are in abusive relationships need therapy, but a lot of them won't seek it. It's really unfortunate. I'll check out the repo…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 08:45 PM
1

I'll never buy myself fur, real or fake, but I think real leather shoes and bags make more sense. Vegan leather is plastic, and it's worse for the environment long-term.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 08:37 PM
2

Most women do avoid these guys, no? Unless you're talking about people from certain socioeconomic levels where there are far more abusers/cheaters/deadbeat fathers etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 08:32 PM
1

Reddit stories have to be taken "as if". Wanted children are blessings, but not all people want to have kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 08:11 PM
1

PPD has poisoned us.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 08:02 PM
–

Well, the alternative is to die young, have no spouse or no kids. Having active retirement years doesn’t sound too bad - you usually don’t crumble into infirm body at your 70th birthday overnight.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 04:27 PM
1

Emotional labor doesn’t mean it’s wasted. It’s a term defining it. I disagree with the OP.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 04:25 PM
9

Works the same for both genders. Sometimes shitty people punish themselves and end up miserable, sometimes they just get away with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 04:25 PM
24

The problem is that relationship and sex aren’t rewards to be given for good behavior. People date partners they’re attracted to - some people date shitty men/women, but a lot of us have decent partners. We haven’t started dating them to reward them though.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 03:14 PM
4

Emotional labor acknowledges that being supportive does take efforts. It doesn’t mean people shouldn’t do it. It does mean that it should be reciprocated and valued.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 03:07 PM
4

No, it doesn’t exactly work like this. Supporting your partner does take efforts, and the more support they need the more efforts you’ll spend on it. If they have mental health issues or are going through grieving, you will feel the weight of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 03:06 PM
1

Women have to follow the same laws considering their sexuality - don’t force it on others. Morality-wise cheating is shamed for both genders as well. There’s no obligation to shape your sexuality to cater to the opposite gender though. It’s not fear-based - it’s being realistic. Some people aren’t cut out for LTRs, some aren’t interested in it, some have to look for the right partner. People aren’t going to date for the betterment of society. Also, it seems you put it on women to change their at…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 06:25 AM
1

I’m sure it feels very different when you didn’t really want to have a kid in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 06:16 AM
–

Unprotected sex or poor use of contraceptives. They are stupid, yes. I feel bad for the kid(s).
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:59 AM
–

No, having an unwanted kid isn’t really typical. I’ve babysit for my cousins and even lived a bit with one of them - having so much resentment towards your kid is not normal.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:58 AM
–

What do you exactly mean by being an asshole?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:57 AM
–

Does it benefit men? I think the weight of sponsoring the wedding lies heavily on family members who make money. I'm sure a lot of them are men - a father, male siblings etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:31 AM
3

All reddit stories have to be taken "as if".
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:30 AM
–

is there really a significant number? These people are just naïve and/or not observant.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:30 AM
–

You give an impression of a very young and inexperienced person. It would do you good to avoid pill-related communities and content, and instead go and socialize in real life more.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:29 AM
3

Yeah, she has to get her shit together ASAP. She might have not wanted to have kids, but if she decided to proceed anyway, she has the obligation to be a good mother. She needs therapy, and they need some external help. Friends, nanny, grandparents...anyone at this point. Having another unwanted kid is just cruelty and stupidity at this point.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:28 AM
–

I'd guess you were a teenager tbh.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:26 AM
4

How do you know it's the majority of women? Most women do not have the experience of getting abused, and the percent of psychopaths is too low for most men/women have experience of dating them. Most women I know have stable dating lives. Some have been married for years and others are single with no intention to date.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:24 AM
–

This post is just depressing. You shouldn't have kids if you don't really want them just because your partner wants to have some. Breaking up usually is a better option for everyone. Not getting on the pill, getting vasectomy/tubes tied after your first surprise pregnancy and being highly miserable with your life is even more stupid though. They have to deal with it though. Abortion might be a better option, so she could actually go through therapy and get her shit together so she could parent t…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:21 AM
–

Just how young are you?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:21 AM
–

Have no idea as I'm not into celebrities. I think most famous musicians/actors/etc have good looks though. This guy has a solid fan base, and he probably did more than just have a pretty face. Ah, maybe Manson? I have no idea whether he sells his pictures, but he's famous, rich, and known for being abusive towards his partners. I don't think he has issues with getting new lovers though.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:20 AM
–

I think it's a combination of being famous, looks, personality, and the level of exposure. Personality doesn't have to be good to be attractive - if you're charming and interesting enough, you can be an awful human being and you'll get some people willing to date you. Being famous and rich helps a lot here, at least partially through just making more people aware about you. There's no sense for an average guy to compare himself to famous actors/sportsmen etc. He doesn't have the same status or e…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:18 AM
–

This post is just depressing. You shouldn't have kids if you don't really want them just because your partner wants to have some. Breaking up usually is a better option for everyone. Not getting on the pill, getting vasectomy/tubes tied after your first surprise pregnancy and being highly miserable with your life is even more stupid though. They have to deal with it though. Abortion might be a better option, so she could actually go through therapy and get her shit together so she could parent t…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:14 AM
–

I think it's fine to have spaces restricting commenting from users who do not meet the criteria, but they need strict moderation to avoid turning them into echo-chambers. Questions that should be directed to people outside of the group should not be allowed.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:09 AM
–

Do you think it's his appearance? It's mostly him being famous and having some crazy fans.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:05 AM
1

Women's sexuality isn't wrong. It's just different from men's. We have to deal with it just as we have to deal with men being so horny. My point is that even though I'm demisexual, I do not feel attraction to all my friends. It still requires more than just hanging out together and being close emotionally. Some of my friends would be pretty terrible partners, and some have views/plans I do not find compatible. Moreover, I'm pretty sure most of them have never seen me as a romantic prospect. Ther…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:01 AM
1

Why only sons and not daughters? Basic self-defense is a good idea for everyone, but I see no reason why it should be gendered. How often have you fought in your life? Everyone should learn how to cook. It doesn't mean women should be the ones cooking all the time. Sharing chores according to one's free time makes more sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 04:54 AM
3

Why marry someone just to split the bills when you can live with roommates, family, or friends doing the same? With less people wanting to start their own family and have kids, the necessity of marriage has been going away. I’d expect fewer people to get married in the future, and more people waiting till their 30s to do so, not the opposite of it. It will be interesting to see how single older people adjust to their elderly years, and I think we’ll see a rise of communal living.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 02:04 AM
6

Men struggling with dating are outside of average mostly due to some qualities they have whether it's being on the spectrum, having mental health issues, having no social skills, really unfortunate appearance etc. They're outside of average due to their traits. A woman doesn't have to be outside of average for her social group to be raped. You can have average appearance, average income, mental health etc., and this still can happen to you. Do you see the difference?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 01:55 AM
1

Sure you do - most people aren't fully traditional or egalitarian, and they have a mix of both. What is important is to have a partner with compatible views.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 01:27 AM
4

I don't believe in prescriptive gender roles to start with. Men don't have to learn martial arts just because they're men. Women don't have to cook daily just because they're women. People can and should prioritize things they value and care about, not live according to norms that don't really make much sense anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 01:26 AM
7

Why? We share according to our free time. If he has time, he cooks. If I have time, I cook. We both want to spend some quality time together, so we try to accommodate each other. Gym is a hobby, cooking is a necessity. Most people do not fight, and most men do not take any fighting classes seriously.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 12:55 AM
10

It makes sense if you have drastically different working hours. It doesn't make sense if your working hours and workload are pretty much the same. If you want a traditional woman, you have to be a traditional man and provide for your family, so your wife could stay at home/work part-time. My husband and I are egalitarian, so we don't share chores according to our gender. Whoever has the time does what has to be done. When he had fewer working hours, he did most of the cooking and cleaning. These…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 12:23 AM
–

Well, have you proposed?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 11:23 PM
–

Oh, I used to be friends with a guy like this. Self-pitying party whenever you tried to say that he did something hurtful.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 09:21 PM
1

As I've said, I'm demisexual. I do need time to feel attraction, and I've never fallen for a stranger. Spending time with my friends, one to one or not, doesn't necessarily lead to any attraction though. In most cases, it doesn't, In some cases, there was a sense of curiosity, but it faded away when it was clear we weren't compatible. I can't force this sense though, and I see no reason why I or any other people should. It's similar to dating your sibling if you're close enough. Have you never h…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 08:52 PM
–

I'm curious to see what kind of a world you're living where women don't have to deal with the consequences of their actions. Last time I checked, we're all expected to pay rent, taxes, follow the law etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 07:28 PM
1

Honestly, that sounds like a lot of time wasted and giving false hope. If we were already friends and spent time together, I'm not sure why going on dates would help. You usually know your friends quite well, so it isn't a question of getting to know them better. At this point, it might feel like trying to date your sibling. If there's no attraction, and you've already spent some time together, chances that attraction will appear are close to zero.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 07:21 PM
1

We didn't divide it "by half". It's hard to tell who paid more - at that moment we were already cohabitating, and we had completely shared budget. I think I earned just a bit more back then because I found a job earlier. Anyway, the idea is that you already love and trust your partner, so you want to treat them well including buying gifts. I really enjoy giving gifts, and my husband gets gifts that he likes and uses often. They're often on a pricier side of our budget. I'd feel like an idiot if …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 07:00 PM
–

No, neither gender likes the other, and it’s okay. We like individuals.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 05:21 PM
2

Dude, we got the rings to wear for life. They’re nice rings - and they’re pretty much the only pieces of jewelry we wear. We also paid for them together. We were broke graduates lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 05:20 PM
–

You got exposed to it, and you adopted the language. You’re pretty deep in it.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 11:53 AM
–

You wouldn’t know that TRP is without social media in the first place, and you use pill-related words. Whatever time you spend online - it was enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 11:45 AM
2

I’m curious about your reply.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 11:43 AM
2

The algorithms are feeding you the slop.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 11:38 AM
2

You just follow the algorithm and the group you view yourself as a member of.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 11:36 AM
0

So, if men treated women better, women wouldn’t hate them. Isn’t it the same logic? It doesn’t really work this way though. TRP and a lot of toxic stuff in manosphere in general hasn’t grown on a bare ground. It’s grown in the fertile land of gender stereotypes, religions, and remnants of patriarchy. You have admitted some terrible things happening to women in your country which are still common and were common long before feminism. You’re bound to have negative experience with the opposite gend…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 11:34 AM
1

Oh, that’s just pathetic.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 11:16 AM
4

Okay, I’m blue-pilled, and, yes, there are age gap couples. They’re a minority, and the greater the gap the less couples like that there are. They still exist though.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 11:15 AM
2

I do not appreciate your attempt to put women against women, but I’ve seen some posts in feminism spaces that are…concerning. Like “bj are inherently demanding and patriarchal”. It makes no sense to use men’s lens on our sexuality imv.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 11:13 AM
2

At this point, aren’t you just warning about “nice” guys? They say things you want to hear, but if you reject them, they suddenly turn into misogynists.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 11:11 AM
5

I don’t think that they should do these scenes, but I can get why it doesn’t really bother them.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 06:57 AM
7

I’d expect people making money off their appearance are much more chill about nudity.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 06:56 AM
4

They’re still jerking off. Women who work in this industry have to deal with being objectified from early age. I think it might affect how they view their bodies and their sexuality.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 06:40 AM
9

My main point is that OP’s reason doesn’t make much sense for people who are beautiful, famous, and made their career as performance.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 06:26 AM
12

I'm saying that an actress already have men jerking off to her whether she does nudity scenes or not. Her decision to do the scenes probably does not rely on men potentially jerking off to her - it's probably more about whether she's interested in that movie, how comfortable she is with nudity etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 06:13 AM
1

I'm curious what your ideas are.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 05:55 AM
28

I think a famous actress has a bunch of people jerking off to her without her knowledge as it is. Whether she does nudity scenes or not. To answer your question, probably not. The whole problem is that this whole industry is completely outside of my comfort zone, so for me to be an actress, I'd have to have another personality and not to be me in the first place. I don't like attention, I don't like people staring at me, and I'm an introvert.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 03:43 AM
-1

No. Toxic masculinity is the behavior linked to masculine gender role that is harmful either to people around or to men themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 03:40 AM
1

Neither of us is a fun of jewelry, and we didn't have a long period of time between deciding to get married and actually getting married. Buying an expensive ring to wear for a month or two really made no sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 03:18 AM
–

Well, Narnia then, during the golden age.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 02:33 AM
–

No, I mean timeframe of that universe.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 02:28 AM
–

What is time frame? Harry Potter isn't much different from your regular Britain unless you got there during one of magic wars. Narnia is great, but, again, it sucked during the war or during the White Witch reign.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 02:23 AM
6

I don't see much point in a very expensive rings, but I don't think a ring that costs 20$ would last a long time nor it suits the special occasion. We usually try to be mindful about our gifts to close ones, and, well, 20$ rarely cut it unless you have some financial difficulties. My husband and I didn't do the engagement ring thing, but we ordered custom-made gold rings with the design I came up with. They cost around 100$ and for our Russian town it was just a bit below monthly minimal wage, s…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 02:18 AM
1

Like...what?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 02:16 AM
1

Can you give me a practical example? Let's say my friend has asked me out and I'm single. We've been friends for awhile, but I feel nothing romantic towards him. What is your idea here?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 01:13 AM
1

We don't force people to date for the betterment of society. Why would we serve bots if we gave them human rights?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 01:06 AM
–

It's a combination of personality, looks, and luck. There's also a subconscious and more "biological" element - like whether you like their smell or voice. Even if I really clicked with a person, and they treated me really well, I don't think I could deal with an off-putting voice or smell.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 12:56 AM
–

I don’t think it works this way.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 11:40 PM
1

Your pets can reject you. They don't love you just because you own them - you have to deserve that. Some rescued pets won't get close to you to the level you might want it, and you just have to deal with it. And, again, pets and lovers are two completely different entities. We do view pets as "not humans", someone who we own and who we take care of. We also deny them bodily autonomy - I neutered both my cats for their own health, ethics of not getting more kittens when we have so many strays, an…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 10:41 PM
–

You should talk about it with your therapist, but as a 3d party with no qualifications, I think that it might be just another strategy to avoid making close connections. It feels safe because they're far away, but would you get better or would you just be stuck with your avoidance problem?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 10:35 PM
–

Nope, I wouldn't do that. I value physical touch way too much for this kind of shenanigans, and I think people who seek long-distance relationship might have issues with actually holding "short-distance" relationships. Maybe they're avoidant, maybe they just want validation.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 10:25 PM
10

Depends on a man. I used to be friends with a guy who had some mental health problems. A good person and all, but deeply miserable. Even being friends with him was demanding, I couldn't imagine dating him. From the other hand, a guy I liked in middle school friendzoned me. We were good friends, but I think he just wasn't into me, and that's okay.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 10:22 PM
8

What? There are lots of kind men who are in relationships, what are you talking about?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 09:07 PM
1

I used to have pets, but I would never be intimate with them. Do you see the difference?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 09:04 PM
–

You're long-distance now. I would hate it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 08:41 PM
1

We have limited free will, but generally, yes, you could view humans as robots made out of meat and hormones. It's just that we aren't preprogrammed by higher beings (as far as we know) to worship them. Dating a robot who is created to love humans...that's more of taking advantage of someone who cannot reject you.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 08:28 PM
1

I think it's one thing to have the need for personal time, but it's another when you need your partner to be kilometers away from you.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 08:26 PM
1

Love is both feeling and choice. You can't force it to appear, but you can choose to prioritize maintaining and tending it. It's somewhat similar to friendship and other close platonic bonds - you can't force them, but you can prioritize them if they do develop. Race topics are strictly prohibited here, and you should edit your comment if you don't want to get banned. You're talking about bias. It's one thing to hate a group of people due to social conditioning, and it's another thing just not t…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 08:25 PM
–

Not my fault I have very active imagination.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 08:14 PM
5

My guy friends are all in relationships, and I can point out why we wouldn’t be dating even if they were single. Two are much older than I am, and that’s a deal breaker for me. One is more on a traditional side than I’d be okay with, and our political views aren’t compatible. Another one is gay. Being friends with someone who I had romantic feelings to would be really weird considering I’m married. I used to be friends with a guy struggling with dating - we wouldn’t date because he had untreated…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 05:25 PM
2

Oh no, your wife! I ain’t touching other people’s junk even in my head.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 08:38 AM
2

Just no pants. I think it stops being lovely when you get ticks everywhere.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 08:31 AM
3

I’ve imagined you frolicking through the field without any pants.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 08:23 AM
1

Are you a nudist?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 08:21 AM
2

If you're already on a low budget, any further cuts mean that you significantly downgrade your quality of living, so...no. It's easy to sell your second car or not go to your fourth vacation, but saving money on your and your kids diet feels pretty awful.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 04:28 AM
6

My point is that correlation doesn't mean that it's #1 reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 04:18 AM
2

Depends on your lifestyle. If you're struggling as it is, you probably can't downgrade. If you have kids, you probably will have to sacrifice their quality of life as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 04:16 AM
1

That means they don't have free will.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 04:14 AM
5

They're comparing divorce reasons though, no? I know that education level is highly correlated with lower divorce risks, and income is correlated with education levels. We can't say that not having higher education is the main divorce reason though.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 04:11 AM
1

It is a feeling, but you have to choose to prioritize maintaining your relationship. If it was purely a choice, we'd be robots choosing our pair just for practical reasons and staying out of obligation. How do you think it even works? "Acquiring tastes"? I'd be really curious to see a person who managed to force themselves to be into someone who they weren't attracted to naturally, but I would never be this person myself or be okay with dating them. This isn't all bad. That's just not compatible…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 03:50 AM
5

Can you link the statistics? I've seen some studies on the topic, but I don't think finances were #1.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 03:43 AM
9

I'd be curious to see the statistics. I'd guess it depends on the level of commitment and reasons for unemployment. I get that it's anecdotal, but my personal experience is pretty different here - my husband was looking for a job longer than 6 months, my aunt supported her husband for a few years due to his injure (no payment for work injury btw), and my cousin supported her husband during his long-term unemployment which turned into "paternity leave" at some point, and it worked for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 03:28 AM
–

A lack of euthanasia at least for terminally ill patients who are in pain is just pure cruelty.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 03:03 AM
9

Some of them are better at passing off as interesting and alluring, some are good at love bombing, and some aren't much different from regular people, and they have the same chances. Being toxic doesn't mean being irresistible - there are enough toxic single people. Please, please, tell me where I've ever said that only toxic people date other toxic people. Highlight in my comment. No, I don't believe that toxic men are better at hooking up or relationships. This is just the idea struggling men …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 01:41 AM
–

I have no idea who she is.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 01:37 AM
9

No, that's not what I'm saying. Please, read more carefully. People with good boundaries do not stick to toxic partners. They can recognize unhealthy patterns, so they leave even if they were into this person at first. People who do stick to toxicity either are toxic themselves, have learnt that this toxicity is normal from their parents, have very poor boundaries for whatever reasons, are very young/naïve, have mental health issues etc. There are numerous reasons, and you can't boil all of them…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 01:09 AM
–

Well, that's a ridiculous claim unless they were talking about functional illiteracy.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 12:42 AM
10

For the reasons I've already listed: Some people are naïve and miss all the red flags, some people have grown in a toxic household and see this behavior as a norm, some people have mental health issues, some are toxic and manipulative themselves etc. Toxicity doesn't necessarily come with looks - if you take a look at news articles about wife-beaters or insane women attacking their partners, not all of them have the looks. Part of being a good manipulator is to look for the right victim. You don…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 12:38 AM
–

Without context it's hard to say, but maybe they meant functional illiteracy.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 12:29 AM
7

This is just an excuse. If a person dates a shitty partner out of desperation, they still choose to date a shitty partner. No, I don't think so. Terrible men aren't necessarily successful at dating - and some of the struggling guys who can't get any dates might actually be terrible men or really bad partners. Good men aren't necessarily struggling either - there are lots of good men who do get dates and/or who are in LTRs.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 12:26 AM
–

Did they mean those people really couldn't read or that they have very poor reading proficiency?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 12:24 AM
17

I'm not really following your logic here. In the past women struggled with leaving bad partners if they had already married them and had kids. These days people can and do divorce or break up for various reasons, including their partner not treating them well, so men and women who are terrible partners probably do have more problems with keeping their victims long-term compared to previous generations. It might be easier for you if you flip the genders. Toxic and manipulative women don't seem to…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 12:20 AM
–

Most men aren't the bottom of the barrel though, and most women probably avoid the real bottom anyway. Who will get some losses from men opting out for bots and AI are sex workers though, and I welcome that.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 12:02 AM
1

Have fun!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 11:49 PM
–

It depends on how wide-spread it would become. I'm not sure we'll make a jump to "most people are dating bots now" any time soon, and the progress probably will be at least somewhat gradual. If women can get a nice enough illusion of romance with bots programmed to be romantic and mindful and all...I don't think they're gonna miss men's attention. Eh, she's ridiculous. If she wants to date, she should be more intentional about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 11:24 PM
–

It only gets better!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 11:21 PM
–

This one was hilarious. I'm not sure whether it's your type of humor, but I read it all in one evening. This one is about the second chance. It's less romance-directed, and the main character is clearly overpowered due to her living the second time, but it kind of strokes my anxiety in the right way. Very classic "cruel Duke of the North" who's really a good ruler of his region and a doting ML. This one has a more interesting plot. Romance isn't the corner stone. A witch and a werewolf. I've rea…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 11:15 PM
–

Why? We already have some women choosing AI bots over dating 💀 That’s a bad sign imv.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 10:54 PM
–

Webtoons, like comics. I can recommend you some if you want, but they’re very women-oriented. There are some more gender neutral though and ones without any romance.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 10:53 PM
–

No, my point is that there are a lot of works with very caring and thoughtful MLs.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 09:59 PM
–

I've been reading a few webtoons, and most of them have a completely smitten male lead who treats his partner as a precious princess...or as precious queen ruling over him lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 09:38 PM
1

I do not share this attitude. Both my husband and I are egalitarian.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 09:30 PM
1

Traditional roles are tiring, sure. Still, it isn't master and slave dynamic.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 09:10 PM
1

Got it, thanks!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 09:09 PM
3

Master slave dynamic and having much less legal rights are about the past. Our gender roles, dating norms, and some social norms do have roots in those times and norms. It's got much better, but we have a lot of leftovers still.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 08:39 PM
3

I'm referring women having far less legal rights and being completely dependent on their husbands. Dating norms are rooted in those norms, but being paid for a date doesn't make you dependent.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 08:31 PM
4

Still not master slave dynamic.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 08:15 PM
3

The problem is that our written history is much much shorter than prehistoric times. We don't know for sure what social structure tribes used to have, and some modern tribes do not have the concept of monogamy. Moreover, living in a tribe might have meant that women were not dependent on a particular men - childrearing is often a communal thing in tribes.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 08:15 PM
4

You're talking about written history though. It isn't given that prehistoric societies had any concept of marriage, or that women were following men. We're social and tribal creatures, and enforced monogamy is a pretty recent invention.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 07:34 PM
9

Men and women don't have the dynamic of masters and slaves. Legally, we're equal and hold pretty much the same rights and freedoms with some exceptions for draft and reproductive rights.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 07:32 PM
4

I think current misogyny relies on old patriarchal structures and beliefs, but misandry adds fuel to the fire. There's no reason to make it worse for everyone by adding hatred to hatred, and we'd do a much better job educating young generations if we could reduce both misogyny and misandry they're exposed to online. I also don't think that you have to be oppressed to be hateful. You can hate because you personally have bad experience with the opposite gender without being legally or socially opp…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 07:31 PM
–

Depends on the context. If it's something from my social circle and they've fucked up, I'm going to talk about it when I calm down. I rarely get really angry though.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 07:23 PM
–

A few times in middle school maybe? I don't have time for this nonsense these days.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 07:15 PM
–

Long hair is cool, thanks for contributing to the long hair men group!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 07:13 PM
5

Yep, I did it as a teenager. Partially because I wasn't aware just how horny men are, partially because when I did it, I was still young, and I didn't think I could be "a sexual object" in their eyes.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 07:10 PM
10

There's a particular user, an incel, who got banned and created a throwaway account just to say that he's glad to read Russian news and see people getting killed because I'm from Russia. Empathy!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 07:08 PM
17

No, not really. I think if you need your partner to be away to have a successful marriage, you might not be compatible. At this point it's more about tolerating them during the periods of time they are home rather than making it work. It's easy to grow apart when you don't really spend time together, and both can grow resentful. The working more partner can feel that they're making a bigger sacrifice and aren't appreciated enough, and the other partner can feel that the kids and chores are all o…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 06:57 PM
42

It depends on the conversation. I feel bad for struggling guys who feel lonely and inadequate and get confused with raging incels. Generally, it seems a man has a hard time talking about his dating issues without getting called an incel, and some people really go out of their way to be rude and nasty. I disagree with a common attitude tying a lack of dating success to their moral character - you can be a good person and still get no dates, and you can be an asshole who has several partners. It i…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 06:54 PM
1

Anyway, dating someone who is superior to you in all aspects is…questionable. At this point, they’d view humans as pets.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 08:53 AM
1

Whether you’re kind or generous doesn’t really define who you’re attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 08:40 AM
1

You don’t base your love on your virtues of patience or generosity.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 08:38 AM
1

You don’t choose your partner using your patience whether you’re a patient person or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 08:34 AM
1

Where is it said that they tested only women’s tears? I might be glitching but I see only the abstract.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 08:34 AM
1

So sniffing tears might reduce aggression. It doesn’t have to be women’s tears though.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 08:15 AM
1

As I've said, "falling in love" is mostly infatuation. This person's appearance, behavior and the way they treat you are attractive and alluring. Infatuation is pretty shallow, but it's hard to replicate. I've seen your post about bots - the question is how real they'd feel, and whether I was single or not at that moment. If I was single, I'd probably give it a try out of curiosity, but in your scenario these bots are basically humans. Attraction as sexual and romantic attraction. The desire to …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 03:39 AM
4

Why and what for would they value humans if they're basically just better humans themselves and have free will?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 03:28 AM
1

You have to find a counselor who you feel comfortable with. Generally, a therapist is a neutral party.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 03:23 AM
-1

You missed the point - post it as a post, not as a comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 01:42 AM
-1

You can make a post with that information. Your comment was deleted because megathread is for casual conversations, but your comment can be a full post on itself.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 01:29 AM
–

Girl has been banned before, so don't roll your eyes here.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 11:04 PM
–

One of my cousins had issues with losing weight due to heavy morning sickness. It got better after the first trimester, but when she got her belly, she looked like the belly sucked her dry. We have very similar physique. I'll have to gain some weight prior pregnancy to counteract morning sickness weight loss.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 11:03 PM
2

I think it’s on both partners to keep each other safe. You don’t have to be protective just because you’re a man, but wanting your close ones being safe is expected whatever your gender is.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 10:49 PM
–

You’ll get used to the bus system in no time. First few months, you are going to feel exhausted and hungry all the time though. When I moved to study in college, one time I took the wrong bus and I realized it only when I saw that we were driving pass some forest. I didn’t want to get out in the middle of nowhere, so I just went to their last stop.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 10:47 PM
–

Sure? We usually try to compliment style though, as it feels more personal.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 08:36 PM
–

Nope, I was just very touchy. It's how my girlfriends and I would touch each other, so I just...did the same with guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 08:33 PM
30

If they're basically a superhuman with all human rights, why would they date humans and not each other?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 08:05 PM
12

Passport bros are associated with sex tourists. Sex tourists are looked down at because traveling to a poorer country implies taking advantage of vulnerable people, and it also has an association with molesting minors for money. There is also a noticeable online presence of men who post sexist and racist memes about women from different countries, and this doesn't help with reputation either. People generally don't care much about men who just date internationally. It's far more common these day…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 07:46 PM
3

I think both things are true. A lot of people have poor communication and a lot of people don't take their partners' attempt to talk about issues seriously or don't put enough efforts to solve them. Still, most couples probably do not get broken up or divorced completely out of the blue - there were signs, and maybe there talks, and in some case there was couple therapy or at least mentioning of it. I'm sure there are women who were blind and deaf to their partners as well, and then got "surprir…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 07:40 PM
–

I think it’s about being overly confident and/or mansplaining something you have no idea about.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 06:41 PM
–

Balance. Balance is important. You also can have crippling social anxiety and be overly confident in your other skills.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 06:35 PM
–

You can and should ask not to touch you in a way that makes you uncomfortable.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 06:29 PM
–

She should have asked whether it’s okay. You yourself can say that you’re uncomfortable.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 06:28 PM
–

As a teenager? I didn’t care, and I was very very touchy. My friend and I asked our guy friend to show his pecs, and we touched him all over there. At some point I was cuddling with a guy in bed (fully clothed) because we had brother-sister dynamic, and it was not sexual at all. I wouldn’t do the same these days though. As an adult woman? Hugs are okay, but I’m not playing with their hair, holding hands, giving any prolonged touch that is more on a sensual side. You won’t get clear guidelines he…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 04:46 PM
3

Marriage is still seen as one of major adulthood goals. It shows commitment, and it provides legal security for both partners. Plus, if you want to have kids, you probably want to feel secure with your partner. I’ve never had marriage as a goal though. I thought I’d have a kid but probably wouldn’t get married - I didn’t really have positive examples of marriage as a kid. When my husband and I started dating, we were dating just for fun. Most teenagers don’t date to marry. Our relationship grew …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 04:41 PM
–

Friendly touch is usually “asexual”. Flirty touch can last longer, can touch more intimate areas - head, neck, waist etc. Depending on a woman there might be no clear distinction though. I used to be very “touchy feely” with all my friends, but I heavily reduced touch with my male friends when I started dating. It can be misinterpreted easily, and I don’t want to make my husband uncomfortable. I still hug my guy friends, but I don’t play with their hair, don’t tickle them etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 04:34 PM
1

We’re doing okay, but sometimes it’s just…hard to deal with I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 10:09 AM
1

We had to leave because it wasn’t safe anymore. My family is still in Russia though. I don’t think we’ll be able to go back in any foreseeable future.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 10:08 AM
2

I don’t think that’s ever happened. I’m married, and I let men know that I’m married as soon as it makes sense, so after that I assume that any friendly interaction is just friendly. I can get suspicious over a guy complimenting me a lot or being unnecessarily curious about my husband, but I try not to assume anything malicious unless they really give me the reason to.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 09:50 AM
8

I’m sure there are some divorces that happened completely out of the blue at least for one party. The question is whether it was out of the blue because there really were no signs, or because they didn’t pay attention to their partner’s words or well-being. Most couples usually don’t divorce on a whim - they have a period of high conflicts, a fight that works as the straw breaking the camel’s back, and/or a period of growing apart and living your lives separately as roommates at best. It’s usual…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 09:40 AM
1

I'm watching "Young Sheldon", and seeing their family dynamic...makes me fucking depressed. I miss my family back in Russia.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 12:29 AM
–

Is there not enough rage bait that you have to create your own?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 08:54 PM
–

Most people as most people, including all kinds of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 08:01 PM
–

Autistic because I don't want to get maimed or killed. I've seen criminals in real life - no respect here. Have no idea how I'd make it work though. I've had a few student on the spectrum - it's exhausting.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 07:11 PM
–

Most people usually have some relationship experience prior to getting married, both men and women.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 07:10 PM
2

Being open-minded is different from trying to force yourself to fall for someone. I don't mind meeting people and talking to them - but I've never tried to force myself to like someone. If I don't like someone or if we just don't have a good time together, it's okay, and there are often valid reasons for it. "Love something" - you can find something you like about most people, but you can't use it to fall in love. Plus, just as there's something to like, there's always something to dislike. It's…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 06:46 PM
–

An average man isn’t more powerful than an average woman. Elites are male-dominated, sure, but most of us aren’t a part of them nor date them. Physical strength doesn’t define your legal, social, or economic power anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 05:49 PM
–

Men really don’t like when women categorize them this way.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 05:31 PM
–

That’s a bad decision.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 04:21 PM
1

It does explain some of the difference, but do you think all single mothers have kids that were unwanted by their fathers?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 04:15 AM
1

I’m answering to what is being asked. The reason why more women don’t leave kids with their fathers is that these fathers aren’t interested not willing to raise their kids. Some are outright dangerous to kids as well. We’re talking about existing kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 03:31 AM
–

I think it's the outcome of people being more mobile these days. We used to live with our families - parents and other relatives, but now we move out to live on our own.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 03:25 AM
-1

The OP is asking why women don't leave kids with their fathers - they don't do it because a lot of these fathers aren't trustworthy enough. They're bad parents whether because they didn't want these kids or they have changed their mind. Do you disagree with it?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 01:47 AM
4

Most of our history we also didn't have contraception, so even if men did want to avoid having a bunch of kids, the most reliable thing they could use was abstinence, and we do know how "good" men are at it.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 01:46 AM
1

I think condoms have become more popular somewhere during industrialization, no? They weren't as reliable as what we have now, but they were better than nothing.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 01:45 AM
1

First of all, I don't believe in love from the first sight. It's not love - it's infatuation. Attraction can develop over time, as you get to know a person, but it doesn't work this way for a lot of people, and "getting to know" means getting to know them, not forcing yourself to love them. Attraction does depend on both mental and physical, and you can't make it happen if it isn't there. It's similar to trying to force yourself to like a certain taste or flavor. Attraction and love aren't somet…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 01:43 AM
1

I'm not sure you can think you way into loving someone, but I'm pretty sure you can't think your way to be attracted to someone. If you have to convince yourself, you're into them, there's something off, and it's just not fair towards them.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 12:25 AM
5

I think it does contribute. Couples who do want to have kids have to delay it and/or have less kids compared to their desirable number if they didn't have financial restrains.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 12:06 AM
1

They're different things, but what makes them different is having boundaries imv. I think you're talking about different things here. If you have to think about what you could love about them, they're probably not your person to being with.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 12:05 AM
10

It's not just women though. Given the choice, men also choose not to have as many kids as they used to.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 11:28 PM
9

Agree. Kids used to be an investment - they were an extra pair of hands, and someone to take care of you when you're too old and feeble to work yourself. These days kids are more of expense.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 11:26 PM
27

You should read on the topic - birth rate decline is heavily tied to women getting access to education and reliable contraception. Given the choice, women choose not to pop out a kid every other year.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 10:50 PM
0

I get that it’s not even in any way, but with a lack of paper abortive, men should use the options that they do have - condoms or vasectomy. If they have unwanted kids and put in zero efforts into parenting, we still can say that they’re worse parents.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 10:43 PM
1

Kinda, but I think it’s not gender-specific. These people are kind to everyone. Although, people who go out of their way to please others can have boundaries issues, and sometimes you just look at them and wish they treated themselves better. This behavior does have to be paired up with good boundaries and priorities.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 10:40 PM
1

I wouldn’t expect a guy to know what a leave-in conditioner is.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 10:39 PM
1

If you use to improve yourself or see whether you’re being compensated fairly etc., it’s okay. If you use it to be miserable, that’s counterproductive behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 10:38 PM
–

Sure, it does happen. When people say online isn’t real life, they mean content though.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 08:22 PM
–

I was talking about “you” as women who do sex work.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 08:22 PM
2

Can you give some tangible examples?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 08:21 PM
–

Ohh, I thought it was just apps. Other social medias can be used for dating, but dating-related content there is often created just for engagement.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 07:43 PM
–

Nope. How the hell selling your body is empowering? You play into one of the oldest tropes about women that we don’t have anything else of a value to offer.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 07:38 PM
–

Do words have no meanings anymore? Social medias aren’t dating apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 07:28 PM
–

I don’t believe that sex work is empowering to start with.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 07:26 PM
–

Well, they’re your real life if you limit yourself to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 07:25 PM
6

Better as they’re present. A present parent is usually better than an ascent one.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 07:09 PM
6

Was it the same when you started dating? How old is she?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 06:55 PM
8

Some women are against abortions, and some can they can pull it off on their own. I think a good number of women who are single mothers had a kid with a partner though.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 06:54 PM
–

That’s a good question, but “child marriage” usually means an adult marrying a girl.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 04:48 PM
–

Maybe he thinks men are into marrying children. Some men definitely are, but we call them pedophiles here.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 04:42 PM
17

What does it even mean to value the opposite gender for their intrinsic worth and dignity? I respect human rights, but I don’t value men or women just because they’re men or women. I fell in love with my husband because he is himself and because the way he treats me makes feel loved and cherished. The way he treats me is a reflection of his personality. We started dating because we were into each other though - it took more time to actually love each other. Infatuation and love are different thi…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 04:29 PM
45

I’d guess more women are responsible parents than men. They don’t want their kid to end up with a man who can’t or doesn’t want tot take care of them or in the foster system.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 04:25 PM
53

Generally, it’s sex with my husband over chocolate. Time spent with him over chocolate. If I’m sick, exhausted, feel off for some other reason, it’s chocolate over sex because I have to feel good to enjoy physical intimacy. Cuddles over chocolate every time except when I’m really sick and just want to be miserable on my own in bed. So it’s context-dependent. I’d ask your wife why she has priorities like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 04:22 PM
6

Women who have low n-count don’t necessarily have low libido, but if a woman is an older virgin, there are higher chances her libido isn’t that active. If she’s religious believing in “sex is sinful” stuff, it also can lead to bedroom issues. If a couple waits till marriage, I’d guess their sex life has higher chances to have some problems too.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 04:12 PM
–

I don’t think that being all over your partner is objectifying them. You can want to jump their bones and fuck their brains out and still see them as a whole person. It’s also not an “or” situation - both types of compliments are important imv.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 04:10 PM
–

That’s a good way to destroy your health.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 02:54 PM
–

Poorly. These people regulate themselves poorly.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 02:53 PM
–

I’m curious how the hell you’re going to stick to it long-term.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 01:37 PM
57

Disagree. We can and should talk about issues of both genders.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 01:26 PM
–

Well, I’m in my late 20s. I don’t think that if I had to date right now my preferences would be much different from when I was 16.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 01:23 PM
–

Well, I’m a goddess if I haven’t lost any weight recently and didn’t go below 100lbs again.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 01:20 PM
1

No, but I had to help my friend to look for an apartment because her stepfather was "hitting" on her.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 03:14 AM
1

Using slurs against people is an insult. The question about autism can be an insult depending on the context. Outright calling someone autistic is usually an insult. Saying that someone is lying is not civil, yes, and it doesn't add much to a discussion. You can say that women are dumb and bad at making arguments - you can see multiple comments saying exactly that, and they aren't getting removed. You're free to send me links to DM if you see that a comment hasn't been moderated. I can either de…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 01:19 AM
1

I disagree with it. Men aren't great at being supportive - they just tend to ignore it more imv.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 01:14 AM
1

It doesn't add much, but it isn't technically an insult. As I've said, we don't remove comments calling women lesbians either. Calling men rapist isn't against the rules - just as calling women evil bitches isn't against the rules either. It becomes an insult if it's directed to a particular user. "Men are rapists" - is okay. "You are rapist" - isn't okay. Mods don't necessarily agree with the stuff they do not delete or disagree with the comments they do delete. We have the guidelines. The trol…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 11:34 PM
2

Unless you have a lot of free time and she's high drive, yeah, it's unrealistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 11:11 PM
1

Kittens for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 11:05 PM
1

I love "About time". It's less romance-centered and more about familial relationships imv.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 11:04 PM
1

I agree - people should be more understanding and caring towards their partners independent of their gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 11:02 PM
1

Calling people gay isn't exactly an insult. We generally don't remove comments calling women lesbians either. I do remove comments that use "incel" as a personal insult to a particular user, but, of course, I do not go through a whole mod queue. We have a few people like that on PPD who have admitted that they're pretty much shut-ins. I'm talking about a particular group of struggling men, not all struggling men out there. Persona A: "I'm hungry and thirsty" Person B: "Well, if you can't get foo…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 10:55 PM
5

I don't support them, but I also don't mind them as long as they aren't just sex tourists and they aren't terrible partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 10:30 PM
3

Imagine someone coming into a thread about the hardships of parenting, saying "I think taking care of kids is really not a big deal" What is funny is that I've seen multiple men here saying that women complain too much about parenting, pregnancy or giving birth because these things aren't that hard. Some of them admitted to having no kids. People here are pretty open about their relationship history - just ask if you're curious. When women say that you can find fulfillment even if you're single,…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 10:14 PM
–

I think I've ever worn them to just taken them off almost immediately lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 08:58 PM
–

Are there comfortable tongs? I've never got into them tbh.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 08:40 PM
–

I'm talking in general, not about you.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 07:47 PM
–

Bicycle?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 07:31 PM
–

I think the problem with insecurity is that it makes you care what other people think about you a lot, far more than you should.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 07:27 PM
1

You can share lots of information about yourself without being vulnerable.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 07:24 PM
20

Average depends on one's experience. An average for an office worker in their 40s is very different from an average of a person working in cinematography or from a freshman in a big university. You can change your average by moving, changing your social circle, improving your financial situation etc. There's also a question what criteria we use to say who is really average. Are we talking about appearance? Finance? Hobbies? A man can have a regular job, don't go to the gym, but be great at playi…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 07:24 PM
–

Kinda what I've said. You should support your partner, but you can't and shouldn't be expected to solve their problems for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 07:16 PM
–

Kinda. I completed 2 full courses in July, and I felt like crashing out lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 06:53 PM
–

Balance is important. You should support your partner, but they also should have their own healthy coping mechanisms.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 06:52 PM
–

I befriended a few locals here, and sometimes I feel this jealousy towards how easy their lives are without all the shit Russia is going through. Then I think that it’s good that at least some people have it better. It means there’s hope. And they’re pretty cool people.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 06:39 PM
–

Some people fuck in public places. Restrooms, movie theater, in the nature etc. My advice for you - try to get a room in a hotel.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 06:37 PM
–

I start my classes in the end of August, and I want to throw a fit about it. I’m not gonna because I’ve chosen to do it myself, but I also feel very burnt out. I had 14 finals last school year, and all of them were CS or math related.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 06:36 PM
–

What matters is how you deal with your insecurities. No one likes when their partner or friends make their insecurities everyone else’s problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 06:34 PM
–

Our baby girl is all grown up! It’s kinda cute that we have this community here with regulars sharing their everyday life.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 06:33 PM
1

Dude, I don’t think sex as a need. My husband and I also have a very active sex life because we want to. We both understand that sex isn’t as crucial as food, for example, and sometimes we have to prioritize other things, but generally we’re fulfilled in this way.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 06:32 PM
5

Not really. Both observe from the start - women have to observe whether a man is a good LTR partner too.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 10:37 PM
2

I’m okay with chatting a bit daily, but I don’t have time or desire to talk on phone for 2 hours. I’d say I’m busy.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 10:12 PM
5

This works both ways, but it’s less about actively proving and more about observing.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 09:18 PM
10

I don’t agree with the OP, but I also don’t agree with the idea of “earning” commitment. You should be committed because you want it - and you can see the future with your partner. In the same way, you should want to make big and small nice gestures for your partner because you love them, not because you got the ring.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 08:55 PM
2

The question "which is what" is the question. Men experience higher pressure than women do to conform to at least some parts of their traditional gender role while they're also pushed to abandon their gender role. Some of the messaging...is very confusing and outright contradicting. I think there are many reasons for that including people having double standards, male gender role being generally more beneficial for both men and women and including some parts that should be considered just being …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 07:26 PM
3

Yes and no. I don't think that realistically we can move to a total lack of gender roles as long as we have biological differences defining men and women. Hopefully, we can move to a "descriptive" attitude towards gender roles rather than "prescriptive", so we could acknowledge that there are certain differences between men and women without expecting everyone to follow them. From the other hand, some people do want to have a clear answer to the question "what is a good man/woman", and for some …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 07:19 PM
3

It's not that men struggle to adapt to their new gender role - they struggle to find it in the first place. It isn't their fault, but it's the problem they have to work on. Women can help with it, but women can't define it for them. I do think that both men and women are responsible for upholding gender roles and gender stereotypes. If all women woke up totally egalitarian, we'd have much less sexism in the world...and men would struggle even more because it would be a very drastic change. I agr…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 06:48 PM
2

Women don't hate men anymore than men hate women. There are individuals who have blinding hate towards the opposite gender, but they're a minority. I also don't think that women used to like men more when they were heavily dependent on them and had little to none protection from an abusive/neglectful/cheating husband. It isn't an agree to disagree situation - I've brought up the statistics. It's easy to find this stats, but if you want I can give you the links. Love goes toward an individual, no…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 02:59 PM
3

At this point it’s most likely not water, but earwax that got expanded by soaking the water. You can try ear cleaning drops, or you can just go to urgent care. Do not put rubbing alcohol in your ears, you silly goose. Terrible idea. You’d have better luck with weak peroxide, but ear drops are much more gentle on your ears, and you’d risk less irritation.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 02:02 PM
–

OP, what does decentering mean?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 01:24 PM
–

Reread my comment. Decentering doesn't mean separatism.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 12:57 PM
–

“Decentering” doesn’t mean separatism. It’s about spending more time and efforts on things that aren’t concentrated around pleasing/pursuing/worrying about men.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 12:30 PM
1

This is extremely childish, and it does nothing to actually help women.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 12:26 PM
10

We have it better than before in terms of rights and freedoms, but economy has been getting worse for some time, we have worse work and life balance, social medias are bad for our mental health, we know much more than before, but we can’t do much about it politically, environmental crises is right here already etc. Basically, we have equal rights, but we have a bunch of new and old problems too.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 12:23 PM
2

Your comments still can deleted for contentless rhetoric - you really should read the rules. Also, I think fighting fire with fire doesn’t make much sense. You’re free to do whatever you want, but I prefer not to give more arguments to guys claiming that feminists hate all men. We don’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 07:06 AM
4

If you read the rules, neither misogyny nor misandry are against the rules as long as you are not insulting a specific user here. This is a debate subreddit.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 07:00 AM
18

It’s the outcome of our traditional gender roles. In the context when men had much higher earning potential, and women didn’t have much or any legal power over their property, earnings or even bodies, and they had give birth every other year, judging men by their earning power made sense. You and your kids could go starving if you didn’t have money to buy food. These days, men are still tied to their gender role…but not to the same degree they used to be. If you want to talk about averages, well…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 06:54 AM
14

You can search “unconditional love” on this subreddit and get a bunch of posts saying that men love women, but women can’t love men, or that only “women, kids and dogs get unconditional love”.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 06:44 AM
1

Besides the Beast, all princes are pretty, and their love stories are very rapid.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 04:10 AM
2

Common sense stuff that is pretty obvious I guess. Having a nice body and having your shit together does help with dating. Also, hot and cold games do work on some women - I just wouldn't recommend to have an LTR with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 03:58 AM
0

Today. My girlfriends liked my cooking 👍
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 01:11 AM
2

What do you mean by boring? I think you can be stable and not bore your partner to death.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 01:11 AM
3

Saying that men are trash doesn’t mean you aren’t a piece of trash though.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 01:08 AM
7

We have had multiple posts using her as an example proving men’s struggles. If you haven’t seen them, you can use search bar.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/25 12:35 PM
12

There are celibate women who haven’t been in relationship nor had sex for years.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/25 06:15 AM
1

I wouldn’t trust the safety protocols there, and 5000$ is way too much for a zoo.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 10:31 PM
1

Not sure about "common at all", but I think it largely depends on your background. Friends usually do have some common interests and hobbies, yes. Men or women - it doesn't matter. If they don't have some common hobbies, they enjoy each other's company and do something together, which does turn into a shared activity/experience. That just says more about men rather than about women. If you don't view women as people but as a "blob", of course, you think we're all alike.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 09:17 PM
3

What do you expect me to say here?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 08:32 PM
4

A lot of men have similar experience. Yes, they're expected to approach, but it isn't constant "hoop skipping" when you meet someone compatible.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 08:08 PM
2

Not necessarily, but it's being in a more active search. Although, from the stats being on the app doesn't necessarily mean searching - some people just use it for validation. A lot of single women aren't on apps though.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 07:22 PM
1

I don't think that all men here are shut-ins with no social life, but we've got at least a few admitting just that.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 07:05 PM
–

There are double standards perpetuated by both genders. "Men don't cheat - they exercise their options!" or "it's okay for me to cheat because it's not emotional". "She's a slut for sleeping around, but it's okay if a man does the same". A man is assertive, but a woman is a "bitch" for similar behavior. I do agree on the topic of domestic violence though - male victims do not get help they need, and female abusers try to cover their abuse by their gender. This has to be called out, and they shou…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 07:02 PM
1

Hell, why even women avoid most women because they are such a burden they can't even like each other if they are not exactly the same thing in everything. Have you never met female groups of friends with women from different ethnicities? Or just looking differently? I don't think I've ever had a friend who looked similarly to me, had the same style etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 06:32 PM
1

There's a difference between being negative about a whole group of people - and these comments aren't against the rules, and insulting a particular user. Calling particular users incels is also against the rules btw, and these comments usually do get removed. Unless a man himself uses this word for himself, and it's relevant for the discussion. Again, it isn't an "or" situation. If a person has neither friends nor a partner, and they complain about being lonely, they should work on their social …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 06:29 PM
4

The attitude of not being in active search is common even outside of the US though. Women don't need to have inflated standards in order not to feel desperate for men's company. I know a few people who moved to the US. At least 2 of them starting dating there - one is dating a woman whose parents were immigrants, another is dating another Russian immigrant. They do say that American women have much higher standards compared to Russian women, but they didn't struggle much with finding dates as th…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 06:25 PM
2

It was pretty much the same for my partner though. We met as students, and neither had to go great length to actually start dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 06:03 PM
1

Discussing another user in this way can be considered witch-hunting, and it's against the rules. I don't agree with "no one touches your dick" attitude, but I do think that if a person says that they're lonely, have no partner or friends, saying that they should work on their social circle and learn to create and maintain platonic bonds isn't a bad or malicious advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 04:02 PM
10

I think the "push" is still towards dating and creating your own families though, but it might be a cultural thing. Among my single friends I don't see some unrealistic pickiness - they're just not interested in dating. Women who want to have their own family are mostly in relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 03:59 PM
1

Okay, we’re going in circles now. Agree to disagree I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 03:12 PM
1

I’m curious why you think that personality “compensates” appearance and not vice versa. Have you ever thought that for casual looks compensate a lack of personality?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 03:04 PM
1

Tbh I’d guess that if a person used mostly appearance to pick their LTR partners, that would reflect badly on their decision making and priorities.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 02:57 PM
1

It may depending on how you pick your LTR partners, but, again, attraction isn’t built solely on appearance.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 02:53 PM
1

In your eyes - sure. Objectively, there’s nothing wrong with it though.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 02:48 PM
1

I’d guess that for casual there are just less things you’re looking for, so there aren’t many additional filters you can use. It’s different for an LTR though.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 02:44 PM
1

Why do you think so? Attraction isn’t based purely on appearance. If it works this way for men, it doesn’t mean it works the same way for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 02:37 PM
1

You think that I makes women look bad. Objectively, there’s nothing wrong with it as long as they do feel attraction towards their LTR partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 02:33 PM
1

Maybe some, but it isn’t necessary. Attraction isn’t based purely on appearance.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 02:25 PM
24

The last time I was single, I was a teenager with no experience. I wanted to start dating - but I wasn’t in an active search, and it was more about being open to an opportunity. I was actively looking for friends though, as I moved to study and didn't have friends there. I think the attitude “if I meet someone I’m interested in, I don’t mind exploring it” is very common among single women, but not a lot of them are in active search.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 02:21 PM
8

These are just very young people who think that people in their 30s should retire already. It is wholesome, but now when my grandma is close to leaving this world too, I do wonder whether she really lived in a way she wanted to. She made a great job to make her kids get education, and she taught all her granddaughters to prioritize education and a job over dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 09:04 AM
7

Just to add perspective from a different county - I spent most of my life in Russia, and I’m from Asian background. My grandma married in her early 20s. She did choose who she was marrying, but the courting phase and dating were pretty short. She was considered exceptionally lucky - her husband didn’t beat her, didn’t cheat, didn’t drink alcohol at all, and he brought home money to feed the family. You can guess that the average situation was pretty grim by modern standards. She didn’t work outs…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 08:11 AM
–

Thanks, Zair, that’s very helpful.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 05:12 AM
1

You should discuss beliefs - not insult other users. And, well, I’m not her. I am curious what is wrong with the idea that singleness isn’t the same as loneliness though.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 05:11 AM
1

Out of the sample available for casual, it makes sense that women mostly use appearance. It doesn’t mean that they aren’t attracted to their LTR partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 05:10 AM
1

Not really, but I’m not a native speaker.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 05:10 AM
1

A lot of struggling people say that they're both thirsty and hungry - but they say that they aren't going to reach for water because they don't have any food. Let's not discus another user - it's against the rules.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 01:16 AM
–

Russia has banned calls through telegram and whatsapp. Discord is banned there too. I was using Telegram to call my family and friends who still live there. I guess we'll have to find something else.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 01:02 AM
1

I think there's a misunderstanding. I do think that there's a difference between having friends and having a romantic partner. Struggling with loneliness isn't just about being single though, and a person can be lonely while being in relationships and vice versa. Current "male loneliness epidemic" concentrates largely on men being single, but a lot of struggling people have neither friends or a romantic partner. Telling them to put more efforts to get platonic friends does make sense in this con…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 12:55 AM
1

It isn't personality vs looks. it's both. A lot of women wouldn't consider a man for an LTR if they weren't attracted to him.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 12:47 AM
1

I think struggling with not having a partner isn't necessarily struggling with being lonely and vice versa. It can be isolating on its own, but if a person is lonely, it isn't weird to ask them whether they have friends or put any efforts into creating/maintaining platonic relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 12:42 AM
1

No. Do you have to be autistic to see the difference between being single and being lonely?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 12:22 AM
1

I think she talks about specific kinds of men complaining about their loneliness, and we have a lot of men like that on PPD.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 12:16 AM
2

Juggling several partners at once isn't realistic for most people, men or women. We have limited free time, limited options, and people generally do not like being "a part of the roster". So people concentrate on something that is attainable. Plus, I do think a lot of people are monogamous. Can you elaborate on the last paragraph?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 12:15 AM
1

That's not an "or' situation though. Most people look for an LTR partner that they do find attractive. There are just extra traits they look for, not just an appearance. You can view it as a game point system, but it isn't how it works in real life. If a person is looking for someone long-term., they look for certain personality traits and some level of attractiveness - personality isn't a compensation here, it's a necessity.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 12:12 AM
1

That's not an "or' situation though. Most people look for an LTR partner that they do find attractive. There are just extra traits they look for, not just an appearance.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 12:10 AM
1

I think a lot of women have had casual sex, but a minority of them have casual sex on a regular basis. some try it once or twice and don't like, so they don't do it again. Some try it, but they get into an LTR pretty fast. The rest isn't enough to satisfy the demand.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 12:10 AM
2

Not necessarily. Casual can be based mostly on looks, but for an LTR you need a combination of looks and personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 10:36 PM
1

I don't think that's what she is saying though. There are some men who complain about being lonely, but their issue is being single. Some of them have friends, but they aren't that close, and some don't have any close human connections, but for some reason they refuse to address it.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 09:06 PM
3

Zair, I think it's just being possessive. She doesn't want to imagine you with other women because it hurts her. It's not that she thinks you wouldn't be able to get any other women to like you.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 08:41 PM
5

WAW isn't about building society or art. It's more about social credit.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 08:40 PM
6

What does wonderful mean here? Compared to men, women are definitely less dangerous and more nurturing. Does it make us "wonderful"? There's a theory stating that WAW effect exists because women are the primary care takers of newborns and toddlers. Women's care is basically the first thing you know as a baby, and your subconsciousness holds onto it as long as you live. On a personal note, I have some bad experience with women - I got bullied by girls during my middle/high school, and I had some …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 08:39 PM
2

As you've said yourself - most men do want long-term relationships. People talk about averages here, so if you want to talk specifically about casual sex, you should define the discussion appropriately. I don't think it makes women look bad btw. Women have more pick for casual sex, so they go for partners who are more handsome. It's just the outcome of supply-demand ratio.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 08:32 PM
1

Men who pursue casual should be honest about it when they ask for advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 08:10 PM
2

I see a lot of men here complaining about not getting any dates or wanting to have a partner to get married. Personally, I don't really care or relate to men seeking casual. I have no advice for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 08:08 PM
2

So...it isn't loneliness on its own, it's a lack of a partner. You can be single and not be lonely. You also can have a partner and still be lonely.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 08:05 PM
1

No, misogyny. Again, the post is about calling out shitty stuff your gender says about their own gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 08:04 PM
2

There are far less women open to casual than there are men, so men have to compete for a minority of women. Struggling with getting something when there's low supply and very high demand is expected.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 08:02 PM
3

What is incorrect with this statement though? If men struggle with being single, it isn't the same as to struggling with being lonely.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 07:52 PM
1

Sure, it isn’t necessary gendered. Although, I think women do a better job for calling out misogyny from other women. We can say that it’s human nature, but it’s still something we have to address.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 07:15 PM
1

So there are double standards. I see it a lot on PPD - some guys spew utter bullshit about their own gender, but they don’t get much of a pushback from other men. If a woman said the same about men, she’d get lots of angry men arguing with her though. Basically, you should call out men who shit on other men at least for things you’d call out women for saying about men.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 07:13 PM
1

I think you still miss the point. It isn’t about any negative comments against the gender - it’s about comments that people get offended but don’t mind when their own gender spews them. “Men need to sow their seed and they have to exercise their options!” is okay for some men here. “Men are cheaters and can’t be trusted” will get much more negative replies, although the idea is pretty much the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 07:10 PM
2

I don’t think it would be a stretch to say that a lot of men do find older teens attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 07:04 PM
2

My friend has a hard exam today, so I’ll bake some fluffy buns to cheer her up after.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 07:03 PM
1

It’s less about specific sayings and more about the attitude overall. Men are quick to take offense when women say negative about them, but they seem to ignore or even agree with the same beliefs coming from men. I think it’s especially common in manosphere with all the push for “alpha men”.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 07:02 PM
1

Look at the title and the post itself. She’s not taking about any hateful beliefs that some women might have about men - she’s talking about beliefs that are shared by some men as well. I.e. we have enough men saying that “all men cheat/want to cheat”, but men take offense when a woman says that. You should apply the same logic vice versa.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 06:45 PM
1

I don’t think people in their late 60s care much about raw attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 06:38 PM
1

If a man says “women should behave a certain way in order not to get raped because men are dangerous”, other men usually don’t mind it. If a woman says that men are dangerous and women have to take precautions, there are at least some men who take offense.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 06:35 PM
1

Have you missed the part “if it’s offensive when women say it about men”? Using the same logic, you should ask not just about calling out women in general, but calling them out on this women call out men. Yes, it does happen btw.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 06:32 PM
2

I still remember my mother’s friend whose husband divorced and then tried to make her “take him back” almost ten years later. Suddenly when he’s older, he needs someone to take care of him lol. She has it too good being single though.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 06:23 PM
1

I think these studies find out that men prefer the youngest group age they include. So it’s 20 if the cut off is at 20, but it’s 18 is the cut off is at 18. Overall, it’s a good reason not to base your self-esteem on your appearance or men’s attention.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 05:58 PM
2

If you want genuine connection, you can’t buy or maintain it with money. You have to spend quality time with your partner. Also, most couples have two working partners, so if one of you comes home and does nothing else, the load is probably pretty uneven - unless working hours are very different.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 02:15 PM
11

Okay, sorry for the misunderstanding. I think both men and women have risks, but they’re different. Men have much higher risks of being murdered, but it probably does have at least some correlation with addictions and being a part of gangs too. Men have some terrible stats for both addictions and crime committing. I’m not trying to excuse it in any way btw, but it’s one of the reasons for such drastic difference.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 05:22 AM
14

I believe I said that men underestimate their risks. Thanks for proving the stats, but do you think you’re disagreeing somehow? I think 1 in 3 is for rape, physical violence and stalking. I might be wrong but I think they’ve included attempted rape there also. It is not just for completer rape.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 05:10 AM
–

The median n-count isn’t really high even for the US. People can have some bad experience, but bad experience isn’t necessarily a result of dating terrible people.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/25 12:08 AM
42

"Women over exaggerate their concerns of their safety" means that either women aren't as concerned as they say, or the danger isn't as big as they think. Your post talks about underestimating men's risks though, so the title is really misleading here. Yes, people underestimate men's risks. I'd argue that men themselves heavily underestimate their own risks of getting assaulted, especially if they live in a fairly safe neighborhood and don't have experience of being mugged/jumped on etc. Men heav…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 11:57 PM
–

I get it, but you don't have to get lucky from the first try and marry your first partner in order not to have experience with terrible men.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 11:51 PM
–

I’ve ever dated only my husband. My friend had a not very amicable breakup, but she wouldn’t say that her boyfriend was a terrible person. My cousins had amicable breakups as far as I know, and they’re on friendly terms with some of their exes. I think a lot of people have some bad experience, but I doubt that the majority of people have dated terrible men/women.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 11:07 PM
–

I’ve never dated terrible men to start with.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 09:33 PM
–

BLADE OF MIQUEALLA
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 09:31 PM
–

Do you know what is a sample bias? For women who do actively participate in the yea app or “dating the same men” groups, your statement might be somewhat true, but there are a lot of us who have nothing to do with either the app or these groups, and who generally have pretty good experience with dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 09:28 PM
–

They think that if a woman can find a man willing to fuck her, she’s not undesirable. I’m not sure how it works together with the guys saying that “pussy is a pussy”, or some men saying they had sex with women they were really not into.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 06:52 PM
-1

Both genders are capable of finding other people attractive, but it’s far more common and wide-spread for men. Women are much pickier, and a lot of us don’t feel attraction purely based on appearance.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 05:43 PM
2

I went back to college, and other students are predominantly guys. Some guys are lonely, and they find me safe enough to talk about their issues. I don’t exactly mind that - I get that being lonely sucks, but it feels rather one-sided. I’m not sharing much of my own problems because these are people I don’t know very well, and, well, I have my husband and friends to vent to.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 05:41 PM
–

I was lucky considering I’ve never really got seriously hurt. It’s a pretty common experience among women, and lots of women have gone through worse things.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 04:52 PM
–

I have never dated anyone besides my husband lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 03:05 PM
–

I didn’t live in a dangerous neighborhood, and I still got followed, groped and one time a man tried to pull me into his car. It’s just not safe to be a girl or a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 12:26 PM
2

I’m not even taking about online interactions here.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 12:24 PM
1

Fair point. I wouldn’t claim that women are indiscriminate in their ability to be vulnerable with other people to the same degree men are indiscriminate with their sexual attraction though. Being your friend’s confidant is still much more special than being listed over.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 12:19 PM
1

No, I prefer to push for egalitarianism.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 12:14 PM
–

There are enough men online with an opposite opinion though.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 12:10 PM
1

Fair point. This whole concept doesn’t make male sexuality any more palatable though.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 11:59 AM
4

Maybe? I have the issue here with some guys deciding to use me as their confidant although we aren’t that close, so I’m not sure about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 11:46 AM
–

How old is she? It isn’t something people usually post in their profiles, sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 11:42 AM
–

Sure, but most discussions here are about western dynamics. Indian dating and marriage are different from what most people engage with here.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 11:42 AM
–

I can’t think of anything I’d intentionally withhold from my husband. We’ve been together for more than 11 years now, what is even there to hide?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 11:25 AM
1

Who cares? It’s kinda nasty to think about, but as long as he doesn’t have romantic feelings for me, I don’t really care.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 11:21 AM
–

btw, this is stats for India that cannot be used to talk about people in the West.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 06:43 AM
–

This is stats for India that cannot be used to talk about people in the West.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 06:43 AM
29

Men are much hornier and have a higher drive for sex. It affects how I treat men around me, starting with prioritizing intimacy with my husband over some mundane things and ending with all kinds of precautions around men I don't know well. Most men don't have eyes only for their partners. They will look at other women and find them pretty, and most of them will watch porn. Male sexual desire and attraction are not discriminate enough, so it can feel very...un-special. Men generally prefer younge…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 06:40 AM
–

Chicken/fish + rice with an extra egg, omelet for breakfast or lunch, cottage cheese for a snack. I'm not sure I'm getting enough protein though.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 06:29 AM
–

When a guy calls you a slut for rejecting him, that's not the right thing deserving any sympathy.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 06:27 AM
2

Husband gets the best I can give - this best just fluctuates from time to time. Same vice versa.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 03:27 AM
2

Men watch lesbian porn, so what’s the problem?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 09:46 PM
2

No. Dating cheaters is detrimental to everyone, men and women. If you’ve cheated, and your boyfriend caved in to take you back, it’s your personal business, but leave the rest of us out of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 09:43 PM
13

This user has an agenda.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 09:42 PM
1

It’s the other extreme here - I was sexually harassed for the first time when I wasn’t even 12.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 09:27 PM
6

Yes. Most married couples I know got married way before they got their own place to live - and now in most of them both partners work to pay the mortgage. The exceptions are people with wealthier parents, both men and women. My husband and I married being broke. My mother basically gave us her apartment to use rent-free though.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 08:46 PM
7

This is acceptable. Men don’t have to be providers anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 05:40 PM
–

Sex is great. It’s just not something to make your life goal or build your life around, but I get how a lack of it can be detrimental for one’s well-being. It isn’t something you can solve on your own though, as you need two willing participants. On a side note, I think asexual people who did try having sex have some validity to say that it’s overrated.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 04:53 PM
7

I don’t think parents should shame their kids for watching porn, but restricting access makes sense. Before the Internet porn did exist, sure. The problem now is that it’s so wide-spread and so easily accessible. It’s one thing for teens to look at naughty pictures now and then, and another to have access to hours and hours of porn.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 04:49 PM
10

What? No, this is pretty much the norm. A lot of couples can’t afford a house, let alone single people.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 04:42 PM
9

Alcohol is detrimental for everyone, whether you’re 18 or 80. Still, we don’t stop adults from drinking.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 04:35 PM
7

Being frank, your post history is somewhat concerning. Advocating for free porn access for kids when you’re not okay with your sexuality doesn’t add any credibility to the idea. I don’t particularly care about people who think kids should have free access to porn.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 04:26 PM
1

It depends on the context. I see people asking for advice and dismissing everything, so the only thing left to say is “learn to live with it”.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 04:21 PM
11

What? You can consent to things that are bad for you. I do think that he of consent should be 18 with the exception for Romeo and Juliet cases.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 04:16 PM
15

That’s not how most people date. Most of us aren’t sitting there creating excel sheets figuring out our and our potential partners’ worth. People date partners they’re into. Some take finance into more consideration, some pay less attention to it, and younger people tend to be less concerned about finance.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 04:00 PM
12

Lots of men marry without buying a house, and I’d guess with current economy a couple buying a house together and working for it together is a more common occurrence.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 03:58 PM
14

Age gap relationships are often detrimental to a younger partner. Wanting people about it isn’t moralizing.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 03:58 PM
–

I'm sure some women use apps for validation. I also know women who have never used apps, and who have been single for years now being pretty content with their lives.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 03:56 PM
6

I don't mind older teens having some access, but elementary and middle schoolers shouldn't be exposed to porn imv. Also, do you think your sexuality hasn't been affected by early porn consumption?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 03:50 PM
4

If you're willing to compete, it means you still want this prize, i.e. it has some worth to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 03:46 PM
9

That's a good point too. Ads should be age-appropriate everywhere, considering that children have access to all social medias.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 03:43 PM
10

Imv sugaring happens when a woman exchanges her time and access to her body for money, and both sides are aware of the conditions of this exchange. So some trophy wives are sugar babies, sure, but not all SAHMs are sugar babies.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 03:41 PM
8

Do you disagree with the idea that kids shouldn't have access to porn?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 03:39 PM
15

I’m not sure whether it’ll achieve the goal, but I do think we have to heavily limit the access to porn. Porn is everywhere online - so we either have to limit the access, heavily regular porn sites, or remove kids from online spaces. I think maybe trying to regulate porn sites would be a better option, but then again the sites can’t really filter out minors visiting them unless we have some control over who’s actually accessing them.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 02:30 PM
–

I don’t care, and I don’t think I’ve ever heard this phrase in real life.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 02:26 PM
–

I’d get the ick to the point of breaking up if my partner believed bullshit like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 02:22 PM
17

People generally don’t care about age gap relationships as long as the younger partner isn’t “barely legal”, the gap isn’t huge, the older partner doesn’t hav history of pursuing only much younger people, and it’s not a sugaring situation. Although, even if a couple hits all red flags, most people won’t try to interfere. Young women are free to date older men if they want to. The narrative that it is a bad idea wouldn’t stop a woman who’s really into it. Age gap or not, most people still date cl…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 02:20 PM
1

Some context?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 06:35 AM
2

Do you....still want to date women?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 04:44 AM
–

We have the current data - religiosity rates are generally dropping for developed countries.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 04:43 AM
–

The share of Christians in the U.S. population has declined from 78% in 2007 to 62% in 2025
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 04:33 AM
2

Are you afraid of women?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 04:31 AM
1

She's not socially awkward - the woman has a more active social life than I do. She's just rather traditional, and she doesn't approve either of her daughters-in-law. I'm probably in favor because I don't overspend on shit and I'm affectionate with my husband, but she still thinks I should be more religious and traditional. I don't care much about it - she just catches me off-guard sometimes.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 04:30 AM
–

You're heavily misinterpreting the statistics. The fact that the popularity of gender equality plummeted so much among religious boys seems to be the main clue available in the survey about what factors might be driving this trend. Unfortunately, the survey contains little other information on religious or political beliefs of these 8th and 10th graders, and further research will be necessary to understand what is driving these trends. In other words, it's religion, not "hanging out" or "not pla…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 04:26 AM
2

My MIL told me that it’s bad for marriage to have single friends because a) they can lead stray your husband or b) you can get jealous over their single lifestyle. She managed to offend both me and my husband here. So, from one hand, she thinks that he’s stupid enough to cheat, and from the other hand, she thinks I’m stupid enough to catch “grass is greener” moment. Or that her son is bad of a husband, so I’d be jealous over my single friends. This woman is the last person I’d get marriage advic…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 03:58 AM
2

The initial stage requires less efforts than household maintaining long-term. Your idea doesn't make sense even for me, who did some heavy lifting with "escalating" and paid in turns for dates.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 03:37 AM
1

Unsolicited advice is annoying, sure, but I've seen people ask for advice in this context,
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/25 09:05 PM
2

If you believe that the reasons for your singleness are totally outside of your control, what other advice do you expect to get?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/25 07:59 PM
1

It is imbalanced, but how would you propose to balance it? Men and women have sexuality that works differently, and you cannot force either gender to change their sexuality just to make it more fair.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/25 07:20 PM
8

We get a post about men loving women unconditionally pretty regularly. I'm surprised how many men confuse lust with love.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/25 07:14 PM
3

You haven't addressed my other points. Do you think a lot of men would stay with their partners and genuinely love them if their partners didn't provide any value to their lives? Lust and love aren't mutually exclusive, and I've never claimed they are. They're just different things. You don’t love strangers or people you barely know. As I’ve already said, it’s infatuation at best, but most often it’s just lust plus some curiosity. It isn’t inherently bad - it’s just not love. If you think that I…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/25 06:44 PM
7

Men are hornier, so they have higher motivation to pursue women. It doesn’t mean men “love” women for who they are - they lust for them, but lust isn’t love. Initial pursuit has nothing to do with love. It’s infatuation at best. To love a person, you halve to know them well, share some experience together, build and support the bond between you, value their well-being as much as you value yours, and have the ability to prioritize it above yours when it’s needed. There are enough LTR couples and …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/25 03:25 PM
1

Men and women have different sexualities. Women don’t view other women this way either.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/25 02:59 PM
1

People do tell white lies, but they're different from lying about your whole relationship. Most people aren't that proficient liars in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/25 03:19 AM
1

Do not provide contentless rhetoric, do not troll, and do not circlejerk.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/25 01:22 AM
1

If you believe that half the people are constantly lying, I guess you could claim just whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/25 01:20 AM
1

How they treat them is a good indicator though. You can see whether a man is enthusiastic about going home or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 10:29 PM
6

I was talking specifically about single women. Married women do spend more - they do shopping for a whole family.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 09:33 PM
5

In one month, the average single American male consumer spends $3,847 or 98.1% of his income after taxes. The average single female spends $3,736 in one month or 116.9% of her income after taxes. The level is very similar, but women earn less.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 09:16 PM
7

I think statistically single men and women have very similar spending levels.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 08:41 PM
1

It's not that someone says, but rather how these men treat and talks about their partners. Men who had their choice and are good partners themselves generally go for women they're into. Guys who had to settle for "whatever" dug their own grave though.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 08:23 PM
–

I think people experience a “libido boost” in the beginning of relationships, and then it goes back to their normal level. It’s much higher for men than it is for women, which is not surprising at all. I could never compete with my husband here. If we had sex as much as he wanted, we’d have it multiple times a day. I can’t keep up with it even purely on physiological level - I need time to rest.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 08:14 PM
–

You need more therapy.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 06:07 PM
1

I think you greatly overestimate how many men pursue women just for sex. There are enough men who are head over hills for their partners and/or who want to raise a family and who who enjoy having a partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 05:37 PM
2

I wonder whether some of them got this wiring because they were traumatized, or maybe because it was the only example they saw growing up.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 05:21 PM
3

I'm curious how my husband and I have AF/BB situation when he's the first and only person I've ever dated. There were periods of time when I supporting us, and now he supports me, so I could study.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 05:19 PM
2

Being from a higher social class helps a lot, but even if you’re really attractive or have good personality, it doesn’t necessarily mean it filters out cheap confetti.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 04:53 PM
3

I think most women do understand it. Men throw their attention as confetti - it is usually neither deep nor meaningful.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 04:08 PM
1

Well, what do you think about anarchy? Anarchy as a lack of centralized government, so instead communities govern themselves. It doesn’t seem to be realistic though.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 01:56 PM
2

I think we need a mix of both. The state should have at least some control on the price of housing, provide free healthcare and education.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 01:51 PM
1

I think a lot of people are obsessed with the idea of getting as much as they can by investing as little as they can afford. The problem is that dating doesn’t work this way. If you don’t invest in your partner, you don’t grow the attachment. With no attachment there are less risks, sure, but there are also no deep feelings.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 09:22 AM
3

There’s commodification of everything. People value monetary things, and with a lack of emotional attachment and involvement, money is a “fool-proof” way to show investment. At least some people believe so. Plus, if a woman isn’t that into a guy, she might see gifts from his as a compensation of a sort. I’m not sure how they convince themselves it isn’t prostitution, but it isn’t something I can relate to.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 09:18 AM
2

Most women have no desire to date someone they aren’t into.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 09:05 AM
17

How old are you?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 07:42 AM
21

You must be…very young. The trope about a guy hating his wife is a very old one, and there are multiple movies using it. Jokes about women have been out for ages as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 07:35 AM
14

I don’t think it’s one-sided. All the jokes about nagging wives or men being chained in marriage were pretty popular among boomers, and they’re still alive today. Male cheating used to be far more accepted than vice versa, and we still have men claiming that they should be allowed to cheat etc. Also, this tactic doesn’t really work. When you just accuse a whole group of people, they get defensive and double down in their beliefs. You should know it from your own experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 07:27 AM
10

We can make certain generalizations about groups of people, but the bigger group you take, the bigger generalization you can make and the bigger mistakes you can commit by doing so. Generalizing women this way makes as much sense as accusing all men out there in crime committed by some men against women, general mistreatment and being poor partners. Again, I know that some women do exactly this, and I disagree with their attitude, - but I’m sure you find it unfair yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 07:15 AM
42

As you’ve said, people in general are hypocritical. Our worldview isn’t whole or holistic although we want to believe it is. We all have some beliefs or engage in behavior that contradict our values. Men and women aren’t much different in this aspect. You seem to view women as a “mass” of people, but there are different women with different views and opinions. You might have better experience if you start viewing people as individuals. I know that you’re going to say “but women!”, and, yes, a lo…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 07:09 AM
0

Talk about...? I do feel like I don't exactly "fit in". These days I'm not sure whether it's a culture difference or something else. I think going through certain experiences make you feel...somewhat disconnected from other people. I've managed to find friends here, but I relate better to my family and friends back in Russia.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 06:00 AM
1

I guess for guys who see relationships just as a tool to get sex, having a whole family does feel like a job. Not all men are so single-minded though.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 05:00 AM
3

It’s a simple concept, but I think people disagree on where the threshold is. A lot of guys here seem to think that you have to be exceptionally attractive, but most men dating are not models.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 03:54 AM
4

Is that…is that a new mental illness?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 03:41 AM
1

We need people to run the society - both men and women, but on an individual level we don’t really need the opposite gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 12:57 AM
1

I was always curious why some guys here thought that sex bots would be their revenge on women. Women might have more motivation to opt out for AI.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 12:14 AM
5

Yep. We can talk about some averages, but it’s important to remember that they aren’t absolute.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 12:12 AM
10

Cheaters are terrible partners. Theres no saving grace for them, and if they cheated once, they’ll do it again, or at least their partner will have to always live with this fear inside.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 12:12 AM
9

Why? Most women aren’t cheaters, so if a guy is capable to get dates, and he’s a good partner himself, he should be able to find a woman who doesn’t cheat on him. Cheaters are a minority, and they deserve to be left alone and miserable.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 11:30 PM
1

Why? Most women aren’t cheaters, so if a guy is capable to get dates, and he’s a good partner himself, he should be able to find a woman who doesn’t cheat on him. Cheaters are a minority, and they deserve to be left alone and miserable.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 11:30 PM
13

I think on average it’s the Venn diagram of intersection. A man can be sexually appealing and be a bad long-term partner, some guys have some good qualities for an LTR but not enough sexual appeal (and these guys often struggle with getting or keeping partners - whatever TRP claims, most women do not want to date a man who they aren’t attracted to), and the ideal is a guy who has enough of both. I’m demi, so these two circles are basically one circle for me. I can’t feel sexual attraction withou…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 11:12 PM
1

I went up this discussion and saw two comments with the stats. If I've missed something, just repost it.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 08:57 PM
1

+50% of the couple meet online It's 2025, the majority of people meet using dating apps Are you talking about these? That's now what I'm asking about though. If you can't provide the stats for your argument and keep things civil, it's on you.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 07:47 PM
3

I get that it’s hard for men to get casual sex. What am I supposed to do with it though? Frankly speaking, I don’t care. Lots of people struggle with getting what they want, and casual sex isn’t a necessity or something that improves the world.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 07:24 PM
1

A lot of us don’t. Some have tried it and didn’t like it, some have never even tried it to start with. I’d guess women who engage in casual sex on a regular basis are a minority, and if the majority of men is interested in casual…the numbers don’t look good for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 07:22 PM
5

Not sure about the numbers, but I think there’s correlation between alcohol intake and sex. There was the stats showing that people drink less and fuck less too these days.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 07:21 PM
3

Contamination OCD! I’ve been dealing with it since the pandemic. I don’t need to take 3 showers though - one is enough. The main part of treatment here is just not following your OCD rules for as long as you can. Sit in this discomfort and suffer to get better eventually.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 06:06 PM
1

I’d guess it’s fairly common among older couples - aging does its thing, but I doubt it’s widespread among couples who aren’t in their 50s-60s yet.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 01:12 PM
1

If something is self-inflicted, it doesn't stop being itself. A lot of loneliness is self-inflicted - people do not seek contact with others, but it's still loneliness.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 04:59 AM
–

You're talking about norms, not rights.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 04:18 AM
–

By their attitude towards their partner. I have a few male friends, and they might complain about certain things, but overall they do enjoy being married. I doubt they'd stay with their partners otherwise. Have you never met a content guy in relationship? I have hard time believing it. Do men avoid relationships? Most guys in my close social circle are partnered/married. I know a bunch of younger single guys through college, but a good number of them seem to be in an active search.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 04:17 AM
–

I was a kid when mother brought me to the city, and her sisters looked...really alike to me. They tested whether I remembered their names, and I did, but I had no idea who was who. So I basically called them something close to "aunty Annamarry".
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 03:10 AM
–

I'm not sure how wide-spread it is. Bad relationships do harm people, but there are enough content couples.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 03:07 AM
–

Some people aren’t cut out for relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 02:49 AM
2

I get that personal experience is bound to be biased, hence, I’m asking whether there are data to showing exact percent from dating apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 02:15 AM
2

I’m asking because I know a few couples who met online - but they all had connections prior to hitting it up online, i.e. friends of friends or some friends’ relative etc. I think it’s pretty different from just apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 01:52 AM
6

What? Both men and women can be lonely. Being lonely != being single, and some people, both men and women, can experience loneliness even when they have a partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 11:11 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter