Dinner is not "the bare minimum" because in current year, every girl has slept with at least one guy without the need for it

Anonynymphet · 2025-09-03T20:27:23+00:00

Like you said, it’s on online spaces where this bullshit “bare minimum” comes from. All these insufferable low class tradwife wannabes on TikTok telling people what the bare minimum is when they aren’t even married/dating to be taking advice from.

I personally paid for my half on first dates because I didn’t want to feel like I owed the guy I was on a date with, even if I was interested. My now fiancé, also didn’t pay for me on our early dates for the same reason. Funnily enough, we both just thought “I’ll set aside £200 a month to spending on dating until I find the right person.” until we met each other. He paid for a couple of first dates with other women on OD because they expected it, but he said the majority of women were wanting to pay for themselves (appreciate this is just his anecdote, as we’re generally upper middle class and there will be a bias - but a bit off topic, as I think majority of posts on this sub are complaining about lower class women) The real “bare minimum” for me was he was nice and made me laugh on that first date, that’s all that really matters in the beginning in finding a loved one.

EulenWatcher · 2025-09-03T17:57:24+00:00

How many women actually expect an expensive dinner for the first date? I'd see it as a red flag.

From the other hand, the idea "best deal or no deal" doesn't make much sense when you're dealing with individuals. You do not know "the best deal" for your particular date, and putting unrealistic expectations won't help you with your dating prospects.

MongoBobalossus · 2025-09-03T17:59:54+00:00

An expensive dinner on the first date is a rookie, cringe move.

attendquoi · 2025-09-03T18:08:11+00:00

Stop asking women out on dates when all you want to do is fuck.

ThatBitchA · 2025-09-03T19:45:30+00:00

My having sex doesn't change that dinner was the bare minimum for first dates.

If a woman wants a dinner date and you don't, that's perfectly reasonable.

The whole point of dating is to find someone you're compatible with.

If a woman wants dinner for a first date, she's not compatible with you. Move on.

MistaCreepz · 2025-09-04T01:18:43+00:00

I was unemployed when I started dating my wife and between jobs again when she accepted my marriage proposal

If you have to try that hard she doesn't like you that much

Redhotangelxxx · 2025-09-03T18:05:18+00:00

I’m gonna play a card that is tossed around here all the time. ”Most likely the demographic you’re using as an example is not the same demographic as those who say that thing”. I have slept with multiple guys without a ”need” for it other than they turned me on and I was into them, and I never demanded to be paid for on a date. The hottest guys I’ve met didn’t treat me or other women better than the less hot guys, they were just more fun to be around

melitini · 2025-09-03T22:53:55+00:00

What’s this obsession with dinner? As if women are an ATM machine you deposit food into and out comes a pussy to fuck.

IF YOU DONT WANT TO PAY FOR DINNER DONT TAKE THEM TO DINNER … like how are “we” still debating this?

ChadChasingBReturns · 2025-09-03T18:29:37+00:00

I’ve never had a problem with men wanting to take me out or being willing to wait for marriage. You can get what you seek or you can’t. This isn’t a societal issue, but a personal one. Stop pretending you want a relationship or to date if you’re looking for sex.

DifferentVillage5152 · 2025-09-03T20:57:23+00:00

if you have to pay for companion its prostitution

themoderation · 2025-09-03T21:21:38+00:00

I was unemployed when I met my wife. Our first date was coffee and a used book store. When a woman actually enjoys your company, she doesn’t need an expensive meal to want to spend time with you. My guess based on your attitude is that it would take a LOT for a woman to want to spend time with you. The kind of man who is convinced every woman has done anything, much less anything sexual, is generally the kind of man who is ahitty company.

Robot_Alchemist · 2025-09-04T01:33:56+00:00

Sapiopath · 2025-09-04T08:03:08+00:00

I don’t see what the issue is. When I go out for dinner I go somewhere I want to go. My date is along for the ride. And if she’s good company that’s enough. I don’t expect to trade meals for sex. I usually cook for my second dates though. And restaurants are 3rd+ date affairs. It’s highly unlikely a woman who doesn’t want to sleep with you comes to your place, watches you cook, has a delicious meal and then decides she’s changed her mind. But of course, maybe you’re an asshole who can’t cook. In which case, learn empathy and take a cooking class.

Tylikcat · 2025-09-04T17:54:13+00:00

I mean, sure, if you want.

I don't let men pay for my dinner. But I'd steer the hell clear from you because of what comes across as a focus on casual sex and entitlement.

Wide-Illustrator2906 · 2025-09-04T18:20:41+00:00

Dinner is way to formal for a first date. First dates should be fun and exploratory

TopShelfSnipes · 2025-09-04T22:49:52+00:00

Possibly unpopular take, but: Dinner dates are boring AF.

Any guy who pitches a dinner date first date - unless he's a foodie and she is too - is an idiot.

There's no more awkward way to date someone than to sit down across from them at a table. And during the critical early stages of geting to know each other, you'll be constantly interrupted by wait staff to serve water and bread, take drink orders, take food orders, deliver drinks, deliver appetizers, and deliver main courses (so at least 5-6 interruptions)...all while having a physical barrier between you, being unable to move, and not having much going on around you to take in or experience organically together.

Unless you're both foodies, and eating IS a fun thing for both of you...the best dates are just going to do something fun together.

The purpose of a date is to have fun together and feel something, not conduct a job interview while stuffing your face.

If an activity date goes well, there's no reason you can't decide to eat a dinner after, but that's okay because if you decide that you've already built a solid rapport.

themfluencer · 2025-09-03T19:41:01+00:00

So what you’re saying is that women’s attention, affection, and bodies should be given freely to any man who wants it, regardless of whether he gives anything in return?

Do some of y’all just not enjoy going out to dinner with people? Going on a date is so much fun if you’re doing in with the right person.

KayRay1994 · 2025-09-03T22:00:48+00:00

“Treat hotter guys better” = more willing to sleep with them?

You’re not entitled to sex cause you paid for dinner lol - also, if you feel like you have to pay to get sex or that you have to engage in an exchange… just get a hooker. You’re trying to buy sex

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ThrowRABigStoveTV · 2025-09-03T21:44:35+00:00

Do women actually use this example as the bare minimum for sex? I hear it sometimes for dating/relationships, but even then this isn’t an example I hear that often.

I mean, I’d consider a woman at least offering to split something - pretending to get their card out at least - the “bare minimum” during the first few dates. I might not want to date them, but if I was really attracted to them I wouldn’t not hook up with them. Feels similar.

InkAddict718 · 2025-09-03T22:17:52+00:00

In order for it to be a fact, it would have to be true

DelDivision · 2025-09-03T22:38:23+00:00

I wouldnt say every girl has, but yeah alot shit women on claim is bare minimum theres dudes who didnt even have to meet that.

I will say alot of this shit would go away if people would just admit to their being tiers for men and letting the chips fall where they may. Tho I do think it will happen as soon as automation kicks in full drive and the bottom caste isnt needed anymore.

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happybaby00 · 2025-09-03T19:02:15+00:00

dinner as first date = she dont like you dawg

riceboykr · 2025-09-03T18:34:45+00:00

If being with you or being seen with you doesn't boost her social standing, she will want to be compensated for her time.

hostility_kitty · 2025-09-04T14:52:01+00:00

I’ll only get into relationships with men who will feed me. Otherwise, I’ll happily hook up but won’t commit.

throwaway73737828 · 2025-09-03T18:34:51+00:00

Who said dinner was a bare minimum on the first place. The bare minimum is be hot, be very fun to hangout, have a car and a crib and thats it. In this post it sounds like you emphasize more about fucking than dating to me. For fucking I explained the bare minimum. For dating its (expecting you to dating to get married), have a good income, be a decent person and date around with 28+ yr old women, those are the ones who wants to get married more. afterall men decide to get who to marry to.

Odd_Quit_8905 · 2025-09-04T04:17:16+00:00

Everyone’s different. For More women (but still only 30/40%) this is true, but there are a sizeable population of women of quality still left.

Yeah needy women are never attractive. It’s always the fat chick or the terminallly acne ridden or dumb ting ranting about height or income, rarely a well put together woman.

Title	Dinner is not "the bare minimum" because in current year, every girl has slept with at least one guy without the need for it
Author	Virtual-Pilot3736
Upvotes	42
Comments	469
Date	September 3, 2025 4:49 PM UTC (11 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1n7k3vw/dinner_is_not_the_bare_minimum_because_in_current/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/dinner-is-not-the-bare-minimum-because-in-current.1561221 https://theredarchive.com/post/1561221

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