~ archived since 2018 ~
~ archived since 2018 ~
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Is there nothing I can do to prevent crappy people around my kids?How does that work or get enforced? | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/11/24 03:04 PM |
| 3 | Do you guys ever financially recover?How exactly does that work? | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/11/24 10:26 PM |
| 6 | So sick of missing her.Same, brother. It hurts and while I miss her, I'm trying my best to heal for the kids. They're all that truly matter now. | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/11/24 09:50 PM |
| 3 | It's always about the money, isn't it?Yeah agreed 100%, my attorney isn't going to bother countering and just told them we can talk at mediation. I won't be discussing finances until 50/50 is agreed upon. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/11/24 03:24 PM |
| 1 | It's always about the money, isn't it?Howdy - I stayed in the house, I am going to try to refinance but we'll have to see where it appraises at. Unfortunately the sticking point right now is that I'm covering all of her marital expenses, but not paying the CS (at the direction of my attorney) because the marital expenses far out weigh the $ amount of CS. My wife doesn't see it this way but oh well. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/11/24 10:25 AM |
| 3 | Things needing extra attention in divorcé settlement negotiationWhy is alimony required? She just finished school at 23, and you were only married 5 years. | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/10/24 07:51 PM |
| 3 | Did coparenting get easier as time went on?Keen for feedback as well - my wife wanted to separate, and we did so last September. I didn't file until May of this year. I never wanted the divorce, but had no other option. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/10/24 08:10 PM |
| 6 | CrossroadsPal this is a divorce subreddit and once you open that up, you can't put the genie back in the bottle. Details matter, and it sounds like you guys would benefit from communication or joint couples therapy. That being said, there is no point in staying in a place where you're unhappy at the end of the day. Consider all the repercussions of a divorce at your age and decide which you value more. It's your life, and you only get to live it once. Edit: I just want to add, this is your partner. You gu… | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/10/24 07:39 PM |
| 2 | Thoughts on cash flow vs liquid during and after divorce?Yep I get that piece. There’s a 0 chance she gets rid of her vehicle, so I guess I’d like to negotiate “my” 16.5k in exchange for say her house equity? Maybe it doesn’t work that way, but I’m cool paying her car off and her keeping it, as long as I don’t have to refinance the mortgage at a CRAZY high amount? | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/10/24 07:42 PM |
| 3 | Thoughts on cash flow vs liquid during and after divorce?Yeah, I'm just trying to figure out the equity piece. My truck is an 07, maybe 8k tops lol | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/10/24 02:38 PM |
| 2 | For those with short term marriages, did you have to pay alimony?Pasting this from my last response: Felt, my wife left and started sleeping with someone else several months later but I don’t think it matters in Alabama. I’m happy to give her any assets and even dump my 401k but we’ll see how it goes. 2 kids, I’m going minimum for 50/50. As much as I loathe her at the moment I do think the kids need both parents. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/10/24 12:05 AM |
| 2 | For those with short term marriages, did you have to pay alimony?Felt, my wife left and started sleeping with someone else several months later but I don’t think it matters in Alabama. I’m happy to give her any assets and even dump my 401k but we’ll see how it goes. 2 kids, I’m going minimum for 50/50. As much as I loathe her at the moment I do think the kids need both parents. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/10/24 12:04 AM |
| 1 | What do you wish you had asked for during divorce/mediation?My kids are in a great school system, overall they'll be happy wherever but ideally I'd like for them to have a decent yard to play in. There are other considerations like animals too. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/10/24 01:23 PM |
| 6 | What do you wish you had asked for during divorce/mediation?My thinking is to refinance in my name only as soon as possible, the thought behind the "1yr or 5.5apr" is mostly so I'd have a bit of buffer after the initial windfall. Today, the big issue is really just around cash flow | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/10/24 09:56 PM |
| 4 | What do you wish you had asked for during divorce/mediation?You’re coming across as extremely bitter, are you okay? I get it, truly. But I want the house for my children. They’re what matters. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/10/24 09:21 PM |
| 2 | What do you wish you had asked for during divorce/mediation?So we’re clear, I want to keep / refinance the house and have her do a quit claim lol | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/10/24 09:09 PM |
| 4 | What did you learn about yourself during and post divorce?I'm learning how to do the single dad stuff and try to embrace it, it's hard but rewarding with two little ones. I can't even grasp the thought of dating in todays world, I'm inherently introverted and have a small social circle. If I dont have the kids, i'm usually in my garage working on my non-running car lol | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/10/24 11:52 PM |
| 1 | Realistically, can a judge require one party to address their mental health/sobriety?How is being nice trying to say if it goes to a.judge I'll get less than 50/50 lol | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/08/24 01:21 AM |
| 3 | Realistically, can a judge require one party to address their mental health/sobriety?With the police, no. But over $300/month at liquor stores, she's called me to pick her up about 25 minutes away intoxicated as she lost her keys on a night she had the kids (they were with her grandmother), and has wrecked two vehicles. One at night but conveniently didn't file a police report or call the insurance company until the day after. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/08/24 12:30 AM |
| 5 | Admitted to Narc ex wife I still love herAh, I wish I had decent advice and I'll turn on notifications to read all the responses. I'm almost a year out from separation and while she's not a formally diagnosed narc, I do think mine has some mental health issues she has to address. She knows I love her, and it hurts to think she made the decision to nuke our family over a bottle, but maybe that isn't her reality. I tell myself she's fighting something deeper and addressing it by numbing her pain. Maybe she, maybe not but I don't feel wro… | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/08/24 10:34 PM |
| 1 | Do you ever regret not fighting for more custody of your children?Am I able to request those types of tests soon? We just had mediation pushed back from Aug to December so there isn't a court date set whatsoever | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/08/24 02:59 PM |
| 3 | Do you ever regret not fighting for more custody of your children?So even with seeing receipts of alcohol and pills in the car, are you pursuing full custody or less? I don’t know that I could handle full custody by myself either. It’s terrifying but how do you cope with the thought that on her days that could be her drinking or what have you | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/08/24 01:49 PM |
| 1 | Do you ever regret not fighting for more custody of your children?I don’t want to regret the decision either way, and I’m not sure which one is right for the children. There are so many additional factors to consider too. If I felt she were stable, 100% on board with 50/50. I’m just worried she’s not. Edit: on one hand, agreeing to 50/50 would speed things up if we can settle on tie breakers. Going for full continues to drag this out and making things worse for the kids, for myself, my wife, and my work even. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/08/24 01:32 PM |
| 2 | Do you ever regret not fighting for more custody of your children?Yeah, I’ve mentioned to my attorney before if we request any type of tests whether it’s alcohol or drug related that I am happy to take them as well, even pay for them. I don’t drink or even take ibuprofen for that matter. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/08/24 01:30 PM |
| 1 | Do you ever regret not fighting for more custody of your children?Yep, have an attorney and they've already received alot of the "proof" I guess. Its one of those things, even with it, unless she gets a DUI with the kids in the car it isnt likely anything will happen. As my attorney put it "it's not what you know, it's what you can prove" but I dunno how that changes things. I just want my STBXW to get better, and I dont know when she'll be ready to. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/08/24 01:23 PM |
| 3 | About to make my retainer deposit. In the case it’s speedy, can anyone tell me if they’ve ever had trouble getting the unused funds back from the attorney?Pal, you're going to exceed the retainer. They have verbiage though that states you'll get anything unused back. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/06/24 11:47 AM |
| 6 | Am I in the wrong here?Man the victim mentality is really messing with me on this one. She wants to go do her own thing, that’s fine. My priority has always been her and the children. Now, it’s just the children. She’s wrecked her car, and now also the rental car she was given. She’s in between jobs. Just burning the world down around her to be honest. But even with all that, unless she’s gets a DUI with the children in the car, best case feels like 50/50. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/06/24 01:31 AM |
| 1 | Am I making a fair settlement offer?No worries, we were married for 5 years and have been separated for 10 months | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/06/24 06:07 PM |
| 1 | Am I making a fair settlement offer?So I went through this earlier, and in the end basically each of us would net positive ~22k ish, splitting assets and debts 50/50. I offered my wife 65k, in my mind that pays her car off, and she would have 27k to get back on her feet, rent, whatever. She came back and also wants alimony. I cant tell if this is a joke at this point. It's actually insane. She claims she will never make as much money as me. I only have an associates degree, and in 3 years climbed from 54k to 122k annually. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/06/24 02:30 AM |
| 1 | Am I making a fair settlement offer?That's fair, I see what you're saying. I'd even agree to split the equity in the house if I sold it later, I'm just mainly wanting to keep it to ensure the kids get in a good school system. My truck is also from 2007 and on its last leg lol Edit;bankruptcy i wouldn't think is a good option. Then I definitely couldn't find another house. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/06/24 04:31 PM |
| 1 | Am I making a fair settlement offer?Yeah I got it, how else would they divide the debt of the car? Just add 20k on top since 40 is owed? What would a fair offer to you look like? I'm really trying to understand because to me it looks like we get out of (most) of the lawyer fees, she walks away with her '22 vehicle, ~20k in liquid cash and I'm just starting the high interest debt and an even higher mortgage rate. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/06/24 04:15 PM |
| 1 | Am I making a fair settlement offer?I’m not trying to rob the lady, but paying for her vehicle and CS would be upwards of $1500 a month alone. That coupled with the cost of refinancing the mortgage is going to have me eating ramen for years to come. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/06/24 04:04 PM |
| 1 | Am I making a fair settlement offer?She left in September, I've tried to fix things up until April which is when I filed as I've come to terms she doesn't want to fix things, and that's okay. But I can't afford two lifestyles. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/06/24 03:59 PM |
| 1 | Am I making a fair settlement offer?Appreciate the insight, what would you consider acceptable? I'm happy to have the house appraised, but even if it DID appraise at 300k, 50% equity would be under 60k. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/06/24 03:58 PM |
| 1 | Am I making a fair settlement offer?Yeah agreed, thing is we don't have anything liquid as the money has always been spent. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/06/24 03:54 PM |
| 1 | Am I making a fair settlement offer?What do you mean? There are kids involved, losing the house means they’ll go to a different school system. I’m offering more than she’d get if we sell in this market after paying for a real estate agent and lawyers fighting. I’m offering her enough to cover her car entirely so that’s not what she has to worry about, she’s staying with her mom while she gets on her feet. I don’t have that option, I don’t have family near me. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/06/24 12:07 PM |
| 1 | Am I making a fair settlement offer?What do you mean by make them sweat? I mean I get playing hardball but tbh the money spent on lawyers I'd rather just go to the kids ya know | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/06/24 08:39 PM |
| 1 | Am I making a fair settlement offer?Most likely, she's in between jobs at the moment and I make a good bit more than her. Our state calculates child support based on time spent with the kids, the $800 is on top of 50/50, so it would be substantially higher otherwise. Edit: health insurance and childcare is paid by me too. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/06/24 08:32 PM |
| 2 | Am I making a fair settlement offer?Yeah look, for me it's about peace and moving on. Sure it's easy to be angry and want to take her through the coals. It'd be easy to keep funnelling money to lawyers and be petty, but I'm ready to live my own life and put my kids in a healthier spot than they are today. It breaks my heart to see the tension of my children rise when my STBXW are around each other. I feel like I'm giving more than half, and I'm doing so in an effort for peace. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/06/24 08:01 PM |
| 3 | Am I making a fair settlement offer?We have mediation scheduled for the end of August - my lawyer is around $300/hr I think it's fair, I'm not trying to rob her. But in theory, she's not eligible for my retirement or alimony due to the length of the marriage. I'm just ready to move on with my life. 🤢 | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/06/24 06:55 PM |
| 4 | It's all my fault.... my son is a nightmare because of me...My guy I was fuming lol My mom passed a few years ago. My mil, my STBXW mom | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/06/24 01:25 PM |
| 1 | It's all my fault.... my son is a nightmare because of me...She's staying with her mother in law whose relatively sane, but I realistically don't know how to prove anything other than saying she's not acting in the best interest of the kids. (My daughter is 10 and I'm worried for her too, this post was mostly geared towards how fucking defeated I feel) | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/06/24 11:24 PM |
| 2 | It's all my fault.... my son is a nightmare because of me...I think she does and I don't know that me saying "my wife has mental issues" is enough to get custody. Man I want her to get better for the children, truly. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/06/24 11:21 PM |
| 1 | STBXW already dating.... Haven't even scheduled mediationYeah, I've got a screenshot and a picture of him in her vehicle but you can't exactly make out who it is. | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/05/24 01:13 AM |
| 1 | STBXW already dating.... Haven't even scheduled mediationHi - I've already retained a lawyer and am the one that filed. A restraining order against a guy I don't know? On what grounds? Me knowing he has a crappy arrest record? | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/05/24 11:25 PM |
| 2 | STBXW already dating.... Haven't even scheduled mediationThe incident occured a month ago .. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/05/24 06:12 PM |
| 1 | STBXW already dating.... Haven't even scheduled mediationDo I need a PI if the records are public? | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/05/24 06:09 PM |
| 3 | STBXW already dating.... Haven't even scheduled mediationMeh, we all technically went to high school together a decade ago? Guess someone she's started talking to recently | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/05/24 05:40 PM |
| 1 | STBXW already dating.... Haven't even scheduled mediationUnderstood, I just reached out to them. He has several FTA on these, but was also arrested in April for some of them. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/05/24 05:16 PM |
| 2 | STBXW already dating.... Haven't even scheduled mediationI mean there are public arrest reports if that counts for anything | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/05/24 05:04 PM |
| 4 | STBXW already dating.... Haven't even scheduled mediationHaha I appreciate it but my question is more geared towards - is there anything I can do to protect the kids? Or just..... Wait and see | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/05/24 03:56 PM |
| 2 | Can’t tell if my STBXW is projecting or actually delusionalHahahahaha it’s to fab up a trans mount for my car, and to learn to weld. Nothing crazy, it’s definitely from harbor freight lol | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/05/24 12:14 PM |
| 8 | Can’t tell if my STBXW is projecting or actually delusionalFeels like it, I mean I’m far from perfect but I can’t change the past. I’m taking time to reflect on what I could have done better, started therapy, and working on myself. At my highest weight I was at 253 (pre separation), down to 219 this morning 💪 | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/05/24 11:48 AM |
| 5 | It's week 3 and I'm already being accused of violating the standing order for moving money.It would be one thing if I WAS hiding money. But I'm not. We don't HAVE any money to hide because it's all SPENT. Christ. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/05/24 11:40 AM |
| 1 | It's week 3 and I'm already being accused of violating the standing order for moving money.I AM paying the mortgage, utilities, her car payment, insurance, etc. I didn't stop, I just moved it to my own account so we didn't continue overdrafting | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/05/24 01:57 AM |
| 1 | It's week 3 and I'm already being accused of violating the standing order for moving money.I mean I get it but if a judge decides I'm violating an order that kinda fucks me | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/05/24 01:41 AM |
| 3 | When did you know it was time?Still early in the divorce process, but separated 8 months before I decided to file. I let a lot of things go, telling myself it was a reflection of how she feels about herself (maybe that’s true), did all the stuff a guy does…. Workout, home Improvement, therapy, marriage counseling, etc) We can really be mean to each other, but I think what did it for me was having not seen my daughter much, and her telling me that she feels like my daughter would never talk to me again if we told her she was … | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/05/24 02:40 AM |
| 1 | Why bother with mediation / settlement if a judge will just assign 50/50?Yes - after I filed the county I am in instates a temporary 50/50 order. This is 7/7 so I’m in the school line to pick up my kiddos right now. I don’t agree in keeping them from their mother for 7 days, so I’m trying to work out a more frequent schedule. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/05/24 07:39 PM |
| 1 | Why bother with mediation / settlement if a judge will just assign 50/50?No idea. I feel like she's been alienating from my daughter because I adopted her when she was three. Until I filed for divorce I hadn't really seen her for several months, but she always brought me my son. Kept saying she doesn't want to see me, wasn't gonna give her, etc. Not really on any grounds other than she's heard us argue, but that takes two. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/05/24 07:27 PM |
| 1 | Why bother with mediation / settlement if a judge will just assign 50/50?Yeah we had things agreed up on and written down already but she's not happy with it I guess. I don't care for the assets much but she doesn't agree on custody so it becomes contested regardless | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/05/24 07:09 PM |
| 2 | Why bother with mediation / settlement if a judge will just assign 50/50?I see what you're saying, it also feels like my STBXW isn't exactly being logical and more emotional | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/05/24 06:00 PM |
| 5 | How I Got Through This HellThe wardrobe is a tough one - all I wear are work clothes lol | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/05/24 07:50 PM |
| 2 | How long did your contested divorce take from filing to agreement?Alabama | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/05/24 12:22 AM |
| 1 | How long did your contested divorce take from filing to agreement?You filed early when? And when is pre trial? | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/05/24 10:51 PM |
| 3 | Is division of assets determined based on the date of filing, or date of divorce decree being signed?....that's a joke, right? Because I want to see my daughter, and there is no price tag you can put on that. | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/04/24 08:35 PM |
| 1 | Is division of assets determined based on the date of filing, or date of divorce decree being signed?Howdy - always look forward to your replies :) I've finally filed on Monday, admittedly the whole direct deposit is a concern as I dont want to look like I'm hiding assets because I'm not, the reality is our joint account has just been going negative since September due to the spend. In Alabama. It's wild. | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/04/24 12:13 PM |
| 3 | Is division of assets determined based on the date of filing, or date of divorce decree being signed?I'd have more but my wife has managed to spend everything in our account for the last year. Now I'm trying to find $900 for my son's tuition. 🫠 | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/04/24 10:55 PM |
| 1 | I filed the paperwork for divorce today.Ah, no worries. Yeah, me too. I'm still pretty raw. I know it'll get better but damn if I didn't want to spend my life with that woman. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/04/24 08:40 PM |
| 1 | I filed the paperwork for divorce today.What? No? | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/04/24 08:37 PM |
| 8 | The lack of accountability becomes laughableOh man this hits home. I'm going through our account now and so far it averages out to $3700 in spend across two liquor stores. Not including anything at restaurants, gas stations, her own credit cards, etc ... Edit: 3700 across 12 months. So $300/month minimum | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/04/24 12:04 AM |
| 1 | Is the cold shoulder common after filing?Ah yeah I blocked her a few months ago, just had some friends send me a screenshot lol | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/04/24 10:45 PM |
| 5 | Is the cold shoulder common after filing?I can see why you’d say that, I know it can’t be saved and I’m not trying to manipulate my wife. I just meant that I never wanted (and still don’t) a divorce, after 8 months I didn’t see another path forward for us. I don’t want to look back a decade from now and ask myself “what if I tried X?” Or “could I have done Y different?” I wanted to know I had genuinely tried everything and given my best effort before committing to the decision that she made quite a while ago. Part of it does still hurt… | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/04/24 09:48 PM |
| 1 | I filed the paperwork for divorce today.I have two children, so seeing her has to happen unfortunately. She's just making herself look like a buffoon. | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/04/24 02:13 AM |
| 1 | I filed the paperwork for divorce today.No idea when she will be served. I haven’t heard from her. She’s somewhat started mocking me, I guess, so there’s that. I posted something about asking for a prayers for the kids and someone sent it to her (I’ve blocked her on everything) and she shared it mocking it. Then proceeded to block my family members. So it’s going great. | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/04/24 02:05 AM |
| 3 | I filed the paperwork for divorce today.I appreciate it - it's been rough, I really did give it a go though and try to understand/fix things. I guess we all do. I don't hold any hatred or ill will towards her. I just want to walk away. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/04/24 08:45 PM |
| 3 | I filed the paperwork for divorce today.Ah, a lot. Plenty of trauma. She’s not been happy or awhile. We’re just not good for each other. I’d love to fix things, she doesn’t want too though. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/04/24 08:27 PM |
| 2 | I filed the paperwork for divorce today.Mate it’s not about the money, I just want my children happy | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/04/24 01:16 AM |
| 1 | Calling itWhich state? I'm also living in the house and present for my youngest son, but feels like my stbxw is alienating me from our daughter that I adopted when she was 3. | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/04/24 01:40 PM |
| 1 | Calling itDid you get 50/50? | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/04/24 01:33 PM |
| 1 | Family lawyerWhere do you practice if you don’t mind my asking? Makes me wonder if it varies by state or truly just judge by judge. I can’t imagine a judge just making an assumption that the mother is a better parent and therefore they have to stay there, I’d hope that’s changed. But such is life, I suppose. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/04/24 11:58 PM |
| 1 | Calling itFeel free to DM me man, in the same boat but it didn’t last 23 years lol | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/04/24 09:55 PM |
| 1 | Family lawyerFrom what you've seen - are males typically given 50/50 custody (assuming they work, aren't drug addicts/alcoholics/etc) If you could give a piece of advice to a father filing that wants 50/50 custody of both their kids, but feels like the mother is alienating only ONE (adopted) child, what would it be? | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/04/24 08:22 PM |
| 2 | What the hell I do if my wife violates temp custody order?I know, apologies as coming off hostile. Conveniently we just had a conversation and she insisted on bringing my daughter outside to prove a point, though I asked her not to bring our kids in to it. It backfired a bit as my daughter said she wanted to stay a few nights with me and my son. Before that though my wife said “if we tell her she’s adopted I don’t think she’ll ever talk to you again” What a shit thing to say and assume about a 10 year old. She doesn’t have any recollection of her bio f… | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/04/24 01:17 AM |
| 1 | What the hell I do if my wife violates temp custody order?I’ve taken care of her for 7 years, she’s my child. I took her to school every day until the separation. I helped her with her homework. She’s just as much my child as she is hers. | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/04/24 01:12 AM |
| 1 | Fighting the urge to text my wifeMy daughter is extremely bright, she knows. We’ve not talked to them about it because up until Easter, I’ve hoped there could be some reconciliation. Right now I have focused on spending what time I can with both of them. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/04/24 11:47 PM |
| 1 | Fighting the urge to text my wifeMy son is 4, my daughter is 10 | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/04/24 11:43 PM |
| 1 | Fighting the urge to text my wifeAlso - not that it adds anything, but my wife brings me my son every single day without issue. It's just my daughter she claims I've traumatized through us arguing, though that's something we both took a part in. My daughter has never seen me passed out drunk on the porch, but she has my wife. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/04/24 11:17 PM |
| 1 | Fighting the urge to text my wifeAgreed, I should have filed months ago but I thought we could fix things by doing marriage counseling and propose an amicable divorce. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/04/24 11:13 PM |
| 1 | Fighting the urge to text my wifeI have texts where I want to see her and a recording of her saying something along the lines of "I dont care what a judge says, if your daughter doesnt want to see you I'm not bringing her to you" | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/04/24 11:12 PM |
| 2 | Fighting the urge to text my wifeHeya- really appreciate all your comments :) You mean schedule and set mediation right before trial? Hopefully the lawyers will make this go as fast as possible. I'm tempted to tell the lawyers at mediation that I'm not agreeing to anything until we get custody settled first, not sure if that would be the best decision though admittedly. I'd kick my own ass if I agreed to everything else in hopes she gives in to 50/50 for custody. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/04/24 11:05 PM |
| 3 | Fighting the urge to text my wifeRight now there isn't an agreement, nothing has been filed. There will be a temporary order put in place after I file, and assuming she doesn't follow that, we'll see where it goes. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/04/24 11:03 PM |
| 1 | Fighting the urge to text my wifeWhat do you mean? Am I supposed to go over the my mother in laws house and demand to see her? I'm sure that wont end up with her calling the cops and trying to get something to stick..... /s She's already blocked me from being able to message my daughter and check on her. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/04/24 11:02 PM |
| 1 | How did you deal with wild accusations/allegations when going through the process?I'm just gonna take your word for it lol I'm not clicking that link | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/04/24 09:05 PM |
| 2 | Stipulations you wish you had asked for?Conveniently my wife got mad when I proposed a cap of $500 per extra curricular /sport per year... I'm going to write some of these down, hopefully the lawyer does a good job drafting it up | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/04/24 02:21 AM |
| 2 | The gym!How does that help with progress? Genuinely curious, have read it before | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/04/24 11:57 AM |
| 1 | Attorney recommends petition for full custody, though I want 50/50. Is that right?I don’t think it’s been long enough for alimony, at least I hope not! | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/04/24 10:49 PM |
| 2 | Attorney recommends petition for full custody, though I want 50/50. Is that right?Assets, she gets the animals and whatever she wants physically out of the house. No alimony. Child support was calculated based on our incomes when she was working Edit: for the house, we’ll just do an appraisal and based on that I’ll either buy her half out or sell and part ways. Not much in retirement…. 30k or so, will give her half that. Not trying to rob the lady, just trying to move on with my life and be there for my kids | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/04/24 12:44 PM |
| 4 | Attorney recommends petition for full custody, though I want 50/50. Is that right?We agree on most everything but custody. | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/04/24 12:40 PM |
| 1 | How did you guys grieve your marriage and the future you planned?So you filed.... And then took it back? | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/03/24 09:19 PM |
| 3 | How did you guys grieve your marriage and the future you planned?Yeah, I hate this thing I keep describing as limbo, it's been 7 months and at the end of the day we have to make one of two very hard decisions. Married or divorced. It's as simple as that. I want to fix things, and she refuses to make an effort towards it. | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/03/24 07:45 PM |
| 5 | How did you guys grieve your marriage and the future you planned?I don’t mind the whole family thing for holidays, but I don’t trust that I can take her word for it, hence why I want it in the paperwork. When we got married 5.5 years ago, I never thought I’d be contemplating divorce. I trusted she would work with me. | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/03/24 04:32 PM |
| 1 | If You’re Hurting Right NowMan, I sure hope so. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/03/24 12:12 PM |
| 9 | My wife has no idea how bad she is fucking upMoney isn't everything, hopefully she will be able to get back on her feet for your children's sake | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/02/24 01:45 AM |
| 2 | StrugglingThere's a long road ahead, but as long as you can start putting in the effort (even if it's little by little) you'll be able to know you've done the best you can. In my scenario, I'm sure a lot of people will call me foolish, and that's okay, but I want to be able to reflect in a few years time and know that I absolutely turned over every rock and stone in an attempt to mend my marriage. | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/02/24 04:03 PM |
| 8 | StrugglingI'm in the same boat, alot of what you'll find in this sub (watch the downvotes on my comment) will talk about how awful women are, how you need to be a man and let her go, etc. While it's okay to have these feelings, and some of it may be true, there will eventually be a light at the end of the tunnel, whether that is reconciling, finding peace in being alone, or pursuing someone else once you've done the work is somewhat up to you. Remember that it takes two for a marriage, and you can only co… | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/02/24 03:53 PM |
| 4 | For all of you that struggle with dating after divorce...What the fuck | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/02/24 07:27 PM |
| 8 | [MI] Wife and I are splittingI don't have any advice other than telling you that was a shitty thing to do. Try and learn from it. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/02/24 05:28 PM |
| 10 | TIL I'm manipulative, I guessAgreed, working on that, but we see each other every day when picking up my son. The conversation usually goes something along the lines of "Did he eat supper?" "Yes" "Ok buddy, tell mom you love her and let's go inside" | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/02/24 02:49 PM |
| 12 | Dating a recently divorced guyThis is the answer, a lot of men think the best thing to do to get over a divorce is to immediately start dating to take their mind off the divorce. He may be a good person, but understand he may not emotionally be ready and have moved on from the divorce just yet. | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/01/24 01:16 AM |
| 0 | Those that filed but didn't want a divorce, how'd you do it?I'm happy with her, but not the way she's acted these last few months. I feel like she's sacrificing everything in her path (including family) chasing something she doesn't quite know yet. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/01/24 05:19 PM |
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