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_Atalanta_ Archive

View 11 posts and 259 comments by _Atalanta_ on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
556

PICKME CULTURE_Atalanta_/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/21 08:00 PM
205

MINDSET SHIFT_Atalanta_/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 05:14 PM
164

DISCUSSION_Atalanta_/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/21 11:54 PM
142

PORN SICK, LIMP DICK_Atalanta_/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/20 03:14 PM
71

REMINDER 👑_Atalanta_/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 07:57 AM
58

MINDSET SHIFT_Atalanta_/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 02:15 PM
39

FDS SUCCESS!_Atalanta_/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 06:22 PM
35

DISCUSSION_Atalanta_/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 07:14 PM
17

STRATEGY_Atalanta_/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 08:53 AM
10

DISCUSSION_Atalanta_/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/20 08:01 PM
1

FINE AF FRIDAYS_Atalanta_/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 02:07 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
21

Gail Dines- our new Patron Saint?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 06:15 PM
6

In my early 20s, I had a phase when I was exercising all the time. I was so slim and petit, had super long hair and would look amazing when I went for nights out at my university. I had never before and have never since been treated SO badly by men, it was horrible. I still look good now, but not model-level-perfect, and things are much better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 08:48 PM
2

Don't do either! He should be doing nurturing things for you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 07:51 PM
3

They used her so badly, it really is sad, I hope she gets free one day!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 06:12 PM
6

Because women should be worrying and stressing about why they are single while men go out and just have a carefree good time
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 06:05 PM
4

Every photographer I have met (even working in fashion) has been a creep or perv
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 09:49 PM
22

HA is 23 the age he is in the picture? 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/21 08:03 PM
13

He can't even be in shape for her. Makes me so angry, she looks like a goddess and he looks like Homer Simpson... and he absolutely could afford a personal trainer/dietitian. EDIT: to add this: https://www.pinterest.com.au/pin/424956914841598506/ Stuff of nightmares!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/21 08:09 PM
6

His version of 'going his own way' seems to be heavily dependent on women...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/21 08:04 PM
63

I also always remember what Emma Watson said during a speech for UN Women, about how her mother had warned her as a child that boys/men would do things 'just to get a rise out of her' and that she should not give them the satisfaction. Any attention is good attention to these kinds of men, we should never break a sweat or show we are ruffled by their pokes and jibes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/20 03:28 PM
18

I think this is a good point, being very wild and passionate is not the same as this abuse. The difference is that one person is doing things TO another in BDSM, they are not doing them TOGETHER
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 08:54 PM
27

The LVM I dated lived in a bachelor house that was a filthy dump, he invited me over for dinner (he cooked at least) often and I never once tidied or cleaned the place for him. I think he was expecting me to offer, I bet his previous girlfriends did.. I found it unpleasant to be there, of course, but I knew instinctively that it would be a mistake for me to set a precedent of cleaning up after him, or cleaning mess that wasn’t mine. Now I know FDS, I am extra glad I wasn’t sucked into being his …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 08:43 PM
2

Yes agreed, I just do recommend doing the preventative measures (hydration etc) after sex even if you don’t have a UTI, it’s very simple and easy and could save a lot of hassle! Yes also both of you having a wash before as well as after will really help 👍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 08:34 PM
11

I’m confused 🤔 He doesn’t like ‘gay or fat women’ but still wants to rape them..? 🤷‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 08:26 PM
5

The UTI thing is good advice. I would also say it is good to try to keep hydrated and eat well for a while afterwards to avoid developing the UTI. I think it is quite common to get one after the first time(s) as your body is not used to this bacteria and has built no resistance. Also I really recommend trying to get rid of your first UTI naturally and not with antibiotics, because if you don’t give your body the chance to learn to fight the bacteria by itself, you could always have problems with…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 08:05 PM
60

Something I got from ‘The Rules’ books is that it is not just preferable to be with a man who earnestly adores you, but essential for your safety. Can’t quite explain how I got this feeling from reading it, but I do think women are in danger of being hurt or abused if they get into relationships with men who don’t really have a high regard for them. You make yourself physically vulnerable when you become intimate with a man, and the only way to be sure he will protect you and refrain from aggres…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 07:39 PM
33

And the gaslighting is being reinforced by wider society..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 07:31 PM
8

I am so baffled by long distance relationship couples.. 🤔 There is one couple I know and they must see each other in person once every 2 weeks at MOST.. usually less. How can she think this is a relationship? How can he not be seeing other people? Does he really abstain from sex for up to 3 weeks on a regular basis? Yet is considered to be in a relationship? 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ Makes no sense to me..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 07:20 PM
16

But I do worry that it simply primes women to turn a blind eye to LV or early abusive behaviours. Under the guise of being a good Christian wife. My friend did this pre marriage stuff and I think it just made her more easy to manipulate 😔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 07:06 PM
45

Main issues: Coffee dates ain’t it, Him forgetting to text means he doesn’t care, you texting anyway shows you are too keen. 🙅‍♀️ If you’ve read the handbook and are still doing this, try some of the recommended reading: ‘Why Men Love Bitches’ and ‘The Rules’ books should clear this up 👍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 06:59 PM
155

😂 It’s like he’s placing an order for takeout or at a restaurant
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 06:55 PM
25

Just a card. A generic one you would give to a colleague, same goes for the message you write inside.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 04:27 PM
11

Ew ew ew.. Stay strong, do not respond! The way he writes is so manipulative 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 03:42 PM
14

I hate this picture for this: she is standing LOWER than him, he is about to LEAD her up the stairs, he is acting and DOING, she is disengaged and PASSIVE. But 50 50 rIgHt?? 😕 These things seem inconsequential but they are actually significant but subtle
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 09:50 AM
38

J K Rowling left her abusive husband to live in (relative) poverty and raise a baby alone. She felt that her life was a total failure but still had the strength to leave him and the situation. I really admire her because she knew a different life, even if it is hard is better than being abused. Edit: to add: Joke is on him, he would never have dreamed she could change the world the way she did! The best revenge 🥳
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 07:17 AM
8

This is just like a gazelle lying down on the savannah in front of a lion.. 😬
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 09:19 AM
2

Yes, but this is the Daily Mail. They could turn a drawing pin into a sex scandal.. They know young women’s bodies are the most clicked on, so this becomes the crux of every ‘article’ 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 07:09 AM
40

“That’s really interesting to me” translation = “I don’t want to accept that” 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 07:02 AM
21

This is so horrible. Their poses seem porn-style 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 08:29 PM
24

It sounds like you already know that this will turn into a ‘forever’ situation without solid commitment. From everything I have seen, once they have you in a wife role there is just no need to bother with more commitment. Like another commentator mentioned and ‘The Rules’ books say, it shouldn’t actually BE easy to date you, in order to weed out those men who are just looking for an easy ride..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 08:18 PM
19

What I gathered from the ‘Why Men Love Bitches’ book is that he should never really feel secure and like he’s ‘got you’ at least not until engagement/marriage. Sounds like your behaviour is letting him know you are keen for the relationship? 🤔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 05:03 PM
4

Aaghhh yuk! 🙀🙀
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 04:51 PM
7

Or life 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 04:41 PM
3

There is a man in my wider social circle and I am pretty sure he is abusive as a partner, (I have seen bits of evidence) but it still takes a conscious effort for me to resist crushing on him. 😬 Despite what I know, I still on some level am attracted to him, and sometimes even get a thrill imagining him pursuing me/being with him. Makes me realise how important it is to keep your self esteem high and healthy, so that you don’t succumb to these people in weaker moments. Just because your brain kn…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 04:33 PM
6

Yes, it’s horrible, I see pre teen girls walking around in public in what look like pants (underwear) with bare legs, bare midriff or in totally skin tight leggings etc, it’s distributing 😦
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 04:19 PM
10

She lost me at ‘bf M47’ 😳 nooooooooo🤦‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 09:19 PM
17

Look up ‘Dread Game’. It’s a whole world of stupidity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 07:29 AM
12

For me, popular music (inc. hip hop) is entertainment, not art. It is much more visible (and repeated) than art, and becomes ingrained in our culture and our thinking to the point of subconscious assimilation, the idea of shock value and challenge provided by art does not really apply anymore. This is just my take.. 🤔 Although I appreciate some of the music I do worry about the impact it is having In normalising things that are bad for women..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 09:20 PM
5

There is something to be said for the stealth afforded by an incongruous look... they judge us based on it, so why not use that against them 😉
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 08:42 PM
9

9/10 people come to their book club apologising that they didn’t manage to read the book 😂 Yes, mainly just a social gathering
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 08:40 PM
2

Ugh, yes, but not suddenly enough! 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 08:28 PM
17

I do think some men can probably grow out of minor abusiveness with maturity. I mean I think many behave that way when young, and after a few life experiences overcome it, but probably only if they see negative consequences from it. Those who see benefits for themselves probably graduate into more serious abusers. I think we need to work harder as a society to bring consequences at early signs of abuse. Lundy Bancroft says that disrespect is an early sign, so we need to stop tolerating this in a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 09:36 AM
15

Yes, they just don’t have a way to deal with this, they obviously expect this approach to always work
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 10:55 PM
67

😧 Wow, this is incredible! It is a perfect demonstration of how someone will escalate their (verbal) abuse until they get the submission that they want. He starts out with faux remorse, tries some lite gaslighting, then, getting no reaction escalates to aggression and put downs... So glad none of it worked on you! 👑 (If you’d caved after the first few you’d never have seen his true colours! )
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 10:52 PM
12

The real tragedy is that Christian Bale looked really hot as Patrick Bateman (that shower scene 👀🤭) Also, I read somewhere that Ivanka Trump answered the question ‘who is her ideal man?’ with Patrick Bateman😂 😳🤢 I really hope she didn’t really know what the film was actually about or hadn’t seen it 🤦‍♀️ Edit: I mean I hope she was just basing that on looks!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 04:50 PM
11

They are not actually that niche. There are huge numbers of them 🤦‍♀️ I had a crush on a budding one of these at university, he acquired adderal without prescription and took it so he could work longer hours, his favourite book was The Wolf of Wall Street.. I would bet he is now into cocaine and that that is the tip of the iceberg.. edit: You are right about it being ‘professional’. Those companies are essential recruiting for ‘Junior Narcissist’ and ‘Executive Psychopath’ etc😬
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 04:40 PM
57

When men say ‘bitter’, they mean ‘on to our bullshit’
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 04:21 PM
6

It certainly keeps the LVM away. I’m having more trouble drawing the HVM in! 🤔🦄 Do they exist? 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 03:50 PM
25

I still have to see mine as he works in the town where I live. The way that I know I’ve moved on is that I CAN still see him and not feel anger, fear, worry, excitement etc etc. He is now just a neutral person like any other. Like they say, the opposite of love is not hate, it’s apathy. If you still feel things triggered by him, even if they are negative feelings, you’ve not fully moved on. I just treat him like anyone else, not special, not rude, not trying to be friends. I don’t ask about how …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 03:45 PM
6

Yes, in order to stop narcissists and abusers we need to change our society so that it stops rewarding their behaviour.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 06:34 AM
9

Yes the point being that he only does as much as he needs to retain control. If you get scared and back down just after some yelling, that is all he will use, if you decide you won’t back down even when you are hit, then he will ‘just have to’ escalate to beating to retain control. 😬 I also recognised some of these behaviours in the experience I had with an ex, I would never have called the relationship abusive (before reading this book), but now see the direction it could have gone in. It is as…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 06:32 AM
17

I really like Lundy Bancroft because he seems to see right through the excuses, like the one teacher at school who knew exactly what was going on with a bully and had no time for their bullshit! We need more people with this understanding in the world!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 06:24 AM
65

These articles are just ‘forever girlfriend’ fodder. Websites write responses to popular google queries in the guise of pop-scientific articles to win traffic. People with nagging anxieties ask the oracle (internet) ‘why won’t my boyfriend of 110 years commit? These inconclusive but intriguing articles keep people hooked who are trying to find answers to their nagging gut feeling of emptiness 🤷‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 10:22 PM
16

I for sure have experienced the ‘spark’ or ‘chemistry’. It is real, but I think it comes from a biological genetic-compatibility thing, and does not indicate personality and modern-life compatibility needed for a healthy relationship. I mean it doesn’t give a green light, it’s evolutionary mechanics, not soulmate connection..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 09:24 PM
37

He actually mentions that studies show abusive men are not more likely to be mentally ill than other men. But it is totally in the interests of the abuser to reinforce the idea that there is a correlation, to absolve him of responsibility. Also goes the other way and reinforces negative attitudes to (genuine) mental illness.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 09:09 PM
37

There IS a reason you are still a virgin at this age. You have not been made to feel comfortable enough by someone you trust, and your gut feeling and judgment to wait has been correct. I was in this situation a few years ago, and had these worries too. I was pursued for a while by a guy who proved to be a LVM, and agonised over the virginity issue. I now know that my confusion was because I was waiting to feel comfortable enough to sleep with him, I wanted to, but it just didn’t feel right beca…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 08:51 PM
15

I almost wonder if this kind of selfless generosity sends them (Edit: the man) on a power trip where they feel untouchable and actually makes them more likely to treat you like shit.. 🤔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 08:05 PM
1

FDS women are good for everyone, the men they marry and families they have all benefit from proximity to a woman with self respect! 👑
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 05:18 PM
8

FDS is amazing because it gives us the x ray goggles to see through all this before we get involved!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 05:56 PM
21

Yes, but I find when you look closer, you find the explanation. My LVM ex seemed on the surface to be a lovely, well brought up man from a great solid family.. but with what I know now I can see that his Mother was a pickme, and Father was also a useless 'nice guy' LVM. Lovely people on the surface, but problems hidden underneath..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 05:46 PM
3

Also in England. Not a ritual, we are just too awkward to accept generosity!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 04:57 PM
2

I've started giving my email instead of number to new acquaintances and I try to avoid going to text/whasapp at all if possible. My ideal would be that a guy makes a plan in person and I put it in my physical diary and that we stay IRL as much as possible.. I'm being optimistic though!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 04:42 PM
4

THANK YOU I am not a texter (even with friends) for these reasons and finally feel vindicated! So irritating and tedious to receive a 'what are you up to' text from a (clearly) bored person when you are busy with your REAL LIFE. Mildly insulting that they want to use you as entertainment or to kill time..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 04:35 PM
4

I have no problem with many aspects of religion and those who practice it, but when it leads to this sort of thing I feel angry. My religious friend from uni was so indoctrinated into this view of virtuous subservience, I feel now like she was groomed to be vulnerable to abuse by those around her. I don't hear from her anymore, I sometimes wonder if she is ok.. EDIT: She got married and moved to another country, alone with her husband.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 04:17 PM
10

The problem is that it is not made with cow's milk? Ah well, we will be the ones laughing at his moobs in 10 years!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 04:09 PM
5

Yep, this is the problem with FWB as far as I can see... The 'benefits' are outnumbered by the negatives!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 04:01 PM
9

Oooh my brother is also a lawyer in London, Cambridge educated - I hope he meets you or someone like you! (Mainly for my sake - I couldn't deal with a pickme sister in law !)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 05:07 PM
22

Jimmy Page is so weird it's embarrassing...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 04:17 PM
1

Oh yikes, thanks for this info!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 01:37 PM
7

Noooo 🤦‍♀️ HE is passive aggressive 😅 I am agreeing with you, sorry if it was not clear!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 01:33 PM
3

Is this just with sexy photos? Or can it be just with any pic of you? I am realistic about men and their ways but also not v informed about these particular habits!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 09:56 PM
7

Making 6 figures doesn’t stop you being a pickmeisha 😣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 09:40 PM
2

Passive aggressive much? 😬
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 09:38 PM
23

Ah, this explains why I love my flat so much! (where I live alone) 🥰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 09:30 PM
25

Ah, that must be why he reminds me of Elon Musk.. 🤔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 08:55 PM
13

“You are showing too much fried chicken “ 😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 08:55 PM
131

Oohhh so they know it! They know the easiest way to get a great woman is when she doesn’t know her worth! 😮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 02:09 PM
2

Also, oh shit! Just read the actual definition of triangulation (I only vaguely knew before) and yikes, yes I think you are right 😳
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 07:09 AM
5

Yes, this was what I was wondering... also totally possible that he is not even aware and that the sister is just poking her nose in. It felt weird when she came to talk to me, she gave away so many personal details to someone she didn’t know and dropped hints about things that I would probably be keen for.. also praised lots of things about my life etc. It seemed a bit like love bombing or even grooming...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 07:00 AM
3

Sure, but this is not the point, this is not an actual romance potential and never was going to be, I am just baffled by the odd behaviour. In the past I would have doubted my gut feeling and convinced myself that, yes, it is fabricated in my mind, spiral into negative self talk about how I couldn’t actually be attractive etc etc. But since FDS I am much more wary and I do feel that something is off. It is more I guess a lesson in caution and not giving up your trust to someone before vetting th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 06:54 AM
2

No wonder, most women are 🤦‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 06:29 PM
3

Oooh feeling this right now in life 😞 But I’m playing the long game, I know it will pay off ☺️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 03:57 PM
31

He says that his wife told him to read up on it, but he doesn’t confirm that he did that. He probably didn’t do that. 😕 He doesn’t seem to have improved his understanding in any way... plus, her not laughing at his jokes may not be an autistic thing, they may just be really bad jokes 😅
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 10:20 PM
19

Yes, it sounds like he doesn’t have his own friends.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 10:16 PM
2

Yes! Came here to say this too! 😂😂 🌱
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:58 PM
6

Because people/society allow them to get away with it. For men, there are different rules 🤷‍♀️ They don’t expect to have to face consequences for their actions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:53 PM
106

Yes, Kardashian Kulture is directly undoing the good work of FDS 😭
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:38 PM
9

I recommend ‘Vagina’ by Naomi Wolf, it’s full of interesting cultural info and science about women’s sexuality and how we can thrive. Talks about how good relationships could be if men and women can understand each other and women’s bodies better. I really wish all young men were required to read it! Also explains how rape is about power and used as warfare, not to do with sexual desire, and the ways that porn is so damaging.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:27 PM
1

I quite like Stealing Beauty with Liv Tyler. It’s a teen romance set in Southern France and has some classic LVM behaviour that she manages to dodge 😉 in favour of a better experience. So funny now after reading FDS to see the blatant LV antics and so rewarding to see her get beyond that. Actually, now I think about it, the film is a bit like a lesson in how to spot unhealthy behaviour and who does/doesn’t care about you. Also taking control of your own life and owning your experiences, not just…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:18 PM
1

An older co worker once told me that my standards were too high. 🤔 She was single, aged 40, really wanted to meet someone. I decided that she was not a great person to take advice from on this issue! She was a lovely person, but clearly her own advice was not even helping her!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:08 PM
3

Hah! My friend said I am like a fuckboy 😂 I seem sort of interested but won’t be consistent or give 100%. Well, these men don’t impress me, so no wonder! 😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:05 PM
5

I still enjoy ‘10 Things I Hate About You’ because Kat Stratford is so smart and sassy! She would for sure rule FDS 👑
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 06:51 PM
6

My mantra: Respect is a right, Trust is a privilege ✨
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 06:41 PM
11

Yes, all this behaviour is a deliberate attack on you, not just “oppsie, I was mean again, I should try to not do that”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 06:31 PM
8

When I read this, I am so grateful for the following resources that have shaped me over the last few years into someone who would genuinely never get this far down the road with someone like this, or be drawn into this experience. The Rules books, Why Men Love Bitches book, and the FDS handbook give so much amazing intel that helps me see through the manipulation and not buy into this. Great though to keep vigilant and really develop a wide ranging knowledge of how abuse can present, thanks for …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 06:27 PM
21

Hopefully not his daughter 😳
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 06:14 PM
40

They name drop ‘Mercedes’ as if that is a magic word with women! A Mercedes is not even that much of a flash car. Even if he’d said ‘Maserati’ I don’t think it would have us melting the way these guys clearly imagine 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 06:14 PM
20

“also there will be no punctuation I am looking for a woman and she will get no punctuation and no capital letters except for my name Anthony because I am a king.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 02:52 PM
61

👏👏👏Stick to your guns! 👍 Wow, this guy is really pushing for you to give in to his flakeyness! Amazing that you just stayed strong, good work! I love this because this is the way we slowly re train men-kind to make a proper effort. Even if it ends with a block delete he may be less likely to do this again to the next girl.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 02:45 PM
15

...and then you might get into confrontations with them because they want to manipulate you and you won’t let them 😣 I’m shocked to realise how many people operate like this now that I don’t tolerate it! So many of our relationships or connections are unhealthy 😦
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 08:47 AM
1

Did he also look like this banana? ⬆️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 09:09 AM
15

Yes, but I think it doesn’t matter, the message goes to women that we can achieve despite negative people
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 09:02 AM
5

Please, don’t let them turn you bitter, generously giving is a wonderfully thing, just make sure it is to people who truly love you and appreciate it! We all have these embarrassing mistakes in life! I also did these things when I first was at university- just start today, right now and leave that all behind! 👋
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 08:59 AM
88

Ummm I naturally have the palest white skin and black hair... 🤷🏻‍♀️ Totally natural, I have never dyed my hair! Many people in England and Ireland have this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 08:05 AM
2

I think this man has the IQ of a houseplant... Actually, that is insulting to houseplants! 😂🌱
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 10:02 PM
45

Yes, it’s to do with the (low) quality of the man, not the quality of the woman
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 09:59 PM
6

Dear Needy Women, the Internet is not a God, Goddess, or superior being. Stop sending it your prayers 🤷‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 06:44 AM
22

I had a clear turning point a few months ago when I first put FDS into practice, It was also related to making a date with a guy (a blind date set up by an acquaintance) and he was being low effort. It took some balls for me to put our practices into action, I felt rude and it was scary to be strict like that, but it was amazing because it worked!! I stuck to my decision and turned his ‘date’ (drink squeezed in after he finished work and a bus ride away for ME to HIS town..🙄) down and then he wa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 06:35 AM
16

😧 Just like Patrick Bateman from American Psycho.. the guy I am referring also has those vibes..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 02:43 PM
43

I do know a guy who’s 39 and looks amazing, but I suspect he is a psychopath 😬
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 06:43 AM
26

Read the handbook 📖✨
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 06:35 AM
15

If they are a decent person, and the issue is genuine, they will explain in a timely way what is going on. Bad sign If they are vague about the problem and go silent leaving you wondering for days/weeks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 09:12 PM
11

Or something more gentle to begin with, even the small ones do the job when you are getting started..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 04:33 PM
2

Yes, this is my current tactic, just annoying though as the block approach means you can get 100% free from them and move on! I don’t want to give up my hobbies though, and it seems like this always happens! If I changed to something different I know i would be right back in the same situation a few months later!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 04:13 PM
1

Oof ladies, my problem is social-circle or activity-club acquaintance level men who have thirsted after me, but not made an adequate move to require a response... I don’t know them enough to block them, but they are always around as part of the group.. so annoying 🙄🤷‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 03:59 PM
2

This is one trend I hate right now, the celebration of mediocrity 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 06:36 PM
7

Yes, will he be sleeping with these men then? Because I won’t! 😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 06:33 PM
8

Also, if you really vet ruthlessly, you may find you have far fewer men than you are used to. This may seem like fewer options, but really you have just weeded out people who were not really options at all and avoided all this drama 😎 I have so little hassle from men nowadays because I stamp that rubbish out before they get started 😉
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 06:16 PM
18

Also it is super creepy click bait the way that top line reads ‘Suri Cruise is Trending in Thong..’ They for sure word these things like this on purpose 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 06:06 PM
4

It is not that the women here don’t sympathise that you might have had a disappointment with a man, but you have made errors that are the bread and butter of FDS. Please read the handbook at the very least, also the recommended reading too if possible. If you absorb the info in these resources and practice them, you won’t have these disappointments in future. Good luck 👍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 05:47 PM
5

In the post industrial world most men no longer do physical labour, now we are seeing the results
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 04:05 PM
4

It is amazing the difference you can make to your body if you become active, fit and sporty and eat well. Women are pressured to work at this constantly to be acceptable, why can’t men do the same? These boys who look like wimps and whine that being short and scrawny keeps them single, should give it a try. They can change, and will probably prefer themselves if they do. People used to be told that they will ‘grow up’ to be big and strong, but this only happens with physical effort!! In the days…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 04:01 PM
5

I don’t think it is the frequency of texts, but the quality of the content. Also it is his behaviour that matters and not his words. If he is very straightforward and arranges a date in advance in a few texts and then is quiet for say, two days, but then texts to confirm on the day of the date, I think this is better than small-talk texts all day every day that lead nowhere 🤔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 03:47 PM
3

At least he realises that the blame lies with another LVM 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 03:31 PM
4

I know not everyone on FDS has read or subscribes fully to ‘The Rules’ books recommendations, but I feel it is really important to highlight this point: Talking on the phone ‘for hours’ is NOT A GOOD THING. You want to go ON A DATE, not chit chat indefinitely. My non FDS friends also really think it is great news if you had a loooong phone chat, but The Rules books clearly say no more than 20mins on the phone, otherwise there will not be an incentive for a IRL date. ⚠️Have you been on a date yet…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 03:27 PM
5

I love FDS. The only thing I worry about now is accidentally abusing my power! It has given me back control, and it’s so effective!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 03:20 PM
15

Virtual reality is the next big tech thing. I’m worried ☹️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 08:18 PM
29

Ooof, Howl was a LVM now I think about it 😔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 07:55 PM
24

I also just scrolled through #challengeaccepted on Instagram and saw a man who had tagged a photo of himself 😂 They just can’t let us have our moment!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 02:21 PM
3

Yes, that’s where they are going wrong on r/seduction 😂 Just look for a Zelda foot and you’re in!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 09:07 AM
119

Massive control issues. As soon as it extends to what you eat, you know it is bad. He is essentially denying her food as punishment for disobedience 😳 Imagine if they were married and he had all the financial control.. It’s like a test.. He shows her the menu, but oh, he KNOWS she’ll pick the salad, and when she does BAM. he set it up as a trap for her 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 09:00 AM
4

Ooooh I think about this too.. I am holding back from telling others about FDS unless they ask for advice of this type. Partly I think that as it is quite tough and extreme, many are not ready for it. A bit like starting a game on Level 11! 😅 I came to FDS after reading 'The Rules', 'Why Men Love Bitches' and a couple of years of mulling over.. I was primed for FDS so got into it without dissonance. The other reason I hold back is because I worry that if we start going out and trying to recruit …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 06:32 PM
5

Yes, I am also very sad to see what is happening to her. I hope she can find a way through this and get back to making her music, which is clearly what is really important to her. Good lesson for us all to remember not to give up or jeopardise what we do best to fit in with a man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 01:49 PM
176

You can wrap up LVM behaviour is all sorts of attractive packaging 🎁 (looks, money, fame etc) but it won’t change the experience you will have to eventually face up to. Edit:spelling
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 11:22 AM
20

Grimes is not a normal, average, neurotypical person. We can’t know of course what the exact issue is, she may not even be aware herself, but there are lots of signs that her way of approaching the world and people differs from the norm. Sometimes I am astonished at how naive her behaviour or speech seems to be, yet she demonstrates exceptional intelligence at other times. Because she is unselfconscious people assume she is confident, but it could be that she has limited awareness.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 08:37 AM
35

Also they way she talks about it sounds as though he persuaded her to have a child. She seemed pretty ‘meh’ about it all. I almost feel as if she hadn’t said ‘yes’ but she ended up pregnant anyway... referred to her pregnancy as being ‘knocked up’. Elon is for sure a bulldozer when it comes to boundaries.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 07:56 AM
58

I think this is fake because: 1. Women are more capable and organised in their daily life than men and so don’t forget to eat or bring a meal, this is totally something that immature men do though. I know many guys who just don’t plan, go out all day and then get home starved, I have never seen a woman do this. 2. A man this douchey would not have the skills (let alone the inclination) to make a meal for her!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 07:29 AM
56

This is especially annoying on Hinge, it promotes itself as ‘serious dating’ and I thought they removed accounts like this.. 🤔 can you report this person?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 07:22 AM
14

Men don’t take hints!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 07:20 AM
38

No. I takes the ‘Rules’ books approach and limit contact and boring chit chat with any man to prevent him getting bored with you. Much better that a text exchange is special and exciting for him. If it becomes an everyday meaningless chore this will not help romance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 07:12 AM
19

It would be ‘amusing’ 🤔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 09:52 PM
3

What! No, why would you mention this!? It is in the past, none of his business. You will just give him leverage to control you. If you have really made peace it is not relevant
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 02:02 PM
6

This article is gross. As far as I’m concerned, the sign of having found the right man is that he DOES believe you to be more beautiful than any other woman (celebs included) even if you are not.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 12:47 PM
13

He probably knows that he couldn’t leave her or trade up even if he wanted because it will ruin his credibility as a ‘dating coach’
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 12:44 PM
3

Forgive but don’t forget!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 12:29 PM
3

“I will make you cry” Yikes!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 12:19 PM
2

They think a sharp suit makes us blind to this sleaze 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 01:32 PM
8

Withdraw the wife privileges. The Rules books recommend that someone in this situation looks into moving out, getting more of her own hobbies, goes away with girlfriends. Basically living a more ‘single’ life, if this doesn’t work, time to move on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 01:28 PM
4

We are not ‘incels’ (involuntarily celibate) we could be ‘volcels’ (voluntarily celibate) 😂 We choose to wait for someone worthwhile 🙃
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 01:23 PM
7

Nerds worship him 🙄 He is literally their messiah
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 10:30 PM
3

He is a red flag for humanity as a whole, not just as a date 🚩😳
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 10:26 PM
4

Elon IS a red flag 🚩 That can be seen from space
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 10:25 PM
2

Be BUSY. Keep yourself occupied so you can't get bored
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 08:42 PM
5

Ooh this is great!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 08:19 PM
21

Where is she in these pictures? Is it her house!? She doesn’t need any douchebag she looks sorted already 😂👑
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 03:54 PM
48

No, he is a seriously masterful abuser. He uses the tactics of emotional abuse and is controlling, Grimes has been the perfect target for him, it was almost too easy. 😞
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 08:03 AM
15

I would bet on a full on psychopath
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 08:00 AM
17

OH GRIMES 😭😭 PLEASE STOP this is just a horror show and a cliche now. All so predictable and just miserable. 😢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 07:59 AM
99

“Stop complicating things” = I don’t want to deal with the truth, I want to talk shit unchallenged
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 07:55 AM
4

Just a Good Guy™️ hating on Danish people 😐
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 07:49 AM
5

We have all been taught by modern society that they way to get what you want is by wanting it really really hard and exhausting yourself to ‘win’ it. This just doesn’t work, many people learn the hard way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 07:42 AM
10

Like stabbing someone and saying ‘oh they wanted me to, they thought it would be fun’ 🤨 I am horrified by all of this. To me, trying to strangle someone is as bad as trying to stab them. It is all bodily harm and assault in my mind.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 07:33 AM
17

Hmm I think it’s one or the other... they wouldn’t need to lie if they were truly unaware, I am betting on full awareness and bare faced lying 😂🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 07:25 AM
26

What is this ‘playing’ ? Watching the kids is a chore! He’s being used!! 🙄🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 07:22 AM
17

Um, no. This is the strategy for the WOMAN. The man’s role is to be the one pursuing. These men will end up in the feminine role in the relationship if they get any response at all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 03:19 PM
9

This must have been pretty painful? I have not had a tattoo myself so can’t be sure, but there are a lot of nerve endings in your fingertips right? Why go through that? 🤷‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 03:15 PM
13

If we each had £1 for every story like this where the age gap is 10yrs 🙄💰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 08:02 AM
1

Ooh oh this reminds me of some thoughts I had recently while re reading the handbook! Amazing work on losing weight, you should be proud and keep building a health attitude to your body 👍 I also get these eating comments, so odd and irrelevant, try to ignore it. ⭐️The thought I was having was about how to be repulsive to abusive men. How to really repel them by showing that you have no weakness for them to exploit 💪 I have always been slim but have felt a tinge of shame/embarrassment that I am n…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 07:38 AM
17

Lots of coffee dates is NOT the mark of successful dating ❌ Ugh if these men would understand that dating should be about spoiling the ONE OR TWO really amazing women that they are very keen for, with a view to soon narrowing it down to JUST ONE, they would find it all much more manageable &affordable. Sure, if you feel entitled to rotate an army of women for your dating life, it is going to add up, even if you just take them for low value dates! 🤦‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 07:11 AM
7

I feel sad that women add a ‘lol’ to statements like this. 😞 Like it is so casual, and just something we have to accept and laugh off...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 07:04 AM
24

This is what I was going to clumsily attempt to describe. I didn’t realise there was a real name for it, thanks!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 10:09 PM
30

It is true that FDS is very dating specific, I had success with what you talk about when I first read the ‘Rules’ books (way before finding FDS). It was my first foray into the ‘do less, get more approach’ and totally changed my mindset. I was trying to apply it to dating , but in order to do it effectively, I found I had to become that person in all areas. It opened my eyes to how much you get exploited when you give, give, give. The key is to expect that you will be treated well because you kn…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 09:20 PM
2

Before FDS, my friends and I would talk about this issue in circles for EVER but never got an conclusions, because it is bullshit. all just bamboozling tactics from LVM. If he wants you he will nail it down, you won’t be left wondering
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 09:11 PM
20

Sounds like your liking for him is not based on his proven good behaviour, but on some fantasy you are projecting. You can’t have any more than a picture and basic info to go on, so cannot really like HIM. I also used to go crazy on the idea of someone, before seeing who they actually were. Have you read the handbook fully?? 🤔 Also the energy you should exude should be cool, calm, unattainable. Not this keen excitement, soz if that is harsh! 🤷‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 09:05 PM
14

Hahahaa FOOLS!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 08:49 PM
11

Low on punctuation, but at least he can spell 😬
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 08:46 PM
2

I wonder if they think ‘car’ and ‘dick’ are synonyms? 😂🤔 “My car is huge”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 08:33 PM
2

The hilarious thing is that while it is a silly cliche that flash-car-men are small-penis-men, I have only ever seen evidence to confirm it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 08:31 PM
1

The empty pot makes the loudest noise 😏
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 08:26 PM
1

I would just be cautious about joining new social media platforms. Once you join you can never really leave 100%, I think they keep your details and profile info.. esp Facebook is bad for this. I have left now but it was hard as I had to wait until I was finishing uni and before a job, so that I was not relying on it for current relationship communication. Much easier to keep track of your info online if you have fewer social accounts. It is easy to make an account, much harder to leave...this i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 08:12 PM
2

At least he is realistic about who’s in his league 😂😂🗑
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 08:02 PM
4

For a pickmeisha or a fool, this question could be a PHD. For a HV FDS woman, not even worth brain power. Either you are engaged/married, or single!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 07:52 PM
4

Ugh it is ALWAYS the 10yr age gap in these horror stories!! The one thing in FDS that I didn’t want to believe at first was that age gaps are always bad, but I am so grateful for these reminders! I really want to stay strong and not ever take the chance ☹️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 07:47 PM
4

Oof, the ones I know aren’t submissive, actually very intelligent, driven, confident. But they have all moved away and prefer to live in the UK, I imagine it is difficult to live in Eastern Europe if you are not a submissive woman.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 07:26 PM
4

Who started this trend for calling yourself ‘Dawg’ ? Oh yes, a man who’s first name is ‘Snoop’..makes sense now 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 07:23 PM
21

Yikes.. and for her, he did: 💭🤷‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 07:19 PM
2

Not sure where in the forum I should post a hello, is there a particular sub category?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 04:54 PM
2

oooff this mindset explains a lot
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 04:19 PM
11

I don't have to detect them, I have to deflect them! I am in exactly your situation (same age) and have found that while it does happen, it is blatantly obvious that a guy is a creep. I find the problem is more with getting rid of him when you know. If you are using the tools in FDS handbook and being observant, it should become clear quite soon. It is good to be skeptical so just try to make it healthy vetting and not paranoia.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 04:04 PM
3

Already learned this the hard way, but great to see it put into words! 👍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 05:14 PM
11

Yes! The headphones and everything! And his back to her, unbelievable!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 05:05 PM
24

My Question: If Sex is so important and such a part of their 'identity' then WHY ARE SO MANY OF THEM BAD AT IT!!?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 04:56 PM
34

YES the biggest danger when approaching him is not that he will say no (because he never will) but that he will say yes but not really want you!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 04:35 PM
6

How does that saying go? Don't use your energy trying to destroy the old, use it to build the new? Something like that!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 07:34 PM
1

I am only on Reddit for this sub, so if it goes I will delete my account
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 07:33 PM
10

My only concern is that maybe it is the labels we use for calling men 'Low Value' or Negative Value' that Reddit is using as the example of our so called 'hate speech' ?? Won't this just be soon banned too? Not saying it's justifiable, just wondering if that's what will happen?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 07:31 PM
3

No. I don't believe this: as long as we as individuals stand our ground and keep our boundaries, they haven't won. We have the knowledge, which is power, they can't take that away from us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 03:05 PM
5

YIKES I know a guy who fits this EXACT description 😂 Hope it's not him!! loll😱
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 02:48 PM
2

Noo! Fear is the enemy! You have FDS, you have the tools you need 👍 I do know the feeling, but just take time off if you need for yourself, I have found FDS has given me confidence that I will be safe as long as I follow it and stay strong! Good luck! Best way is to be happy by yourself, so you don't have to feel at the mercy of LVM for happiness
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 02:36 PM
4

🎶 🎶Hallelujah!! 🎶 👏 FDS is THE TRUTH
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 02:30 PM
6

Yes, I literally only joined reddit for FDS, after lurking for months. Now the dream could be over!! 😭
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 02:13 PM
5

This is all really scary. The is pretty basic free speech, I feel like we are in the age of 'though crime' like 1984. How is pronfreerelationships a problem? Because it actually has potential to threaten the status quo..?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 02:01 PM
14

I literally googled the words 'female dating strategy' hoping to find a few articles.. I hit the jackpot!! 😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 05:26 PM
2

I'm still enjoying that great fruit they told me about 😉
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 12:43 PM
2

You could test by withdrawing, then if that doesn't work, forget it. It sounds like you have given a few times, now withdraw and see if it forces him to make a move. Just be more cold, cut a convo short, or act like you don't notice him as much. Just be less friendly, more business like. Read more about 'intermittent reinforcement' if you want theory on this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 06:56 PM
19

Well done! Don't beat yourself up, my ex friend was in this exact purgatory, but she wasted 7 YEARS!! I gave up on her and we are no longer in touch. Just think of it as 4 years you've gained and get on with your life!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 06:15 PM
12

Unfortunately, a guy I have to see regularly! After months of completely ignoring it and avoiding eye contact, finally seems to have stopped. Mega creepy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 04:47 PM
5

Ooh I had a very skinny phase at college and I was treated noticeable worse by guys. I looked small, probably vulnerable and I guess they saw me as easy prey!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 06:28 AM
13

Or maybe it’s just because I don’t look like a hamster 🤷‍♀️ 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 10:26 PM
29

Oooh I hope this is the reason men rarely approach me haha 😂😂😂👸🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 09:11 PM
29

Ugh the truth is toxic, FDS just tells it ☹️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 09:07 PM
21

Sure, but if we are following FDS or ‘the rules’ we are well equipped to deal with this. This kind of man won’t even make it off the starting block 😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 09:04 PM
4

Hmm, I often wonder about these very early signs of negging. My previous relationships were before I knew what negging was, so I never had a chance to notice. It feels like men are testing the water, to see how much we will put up with, if we firmly call out these initial small negs, I wonder if the man will give up and respect our boundaries? I have only really recognised negging much further down the line (in other people’s relationships), when it is probably too late to regain respect, but th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 11:18 AM
27

Ugh I feel awful for these tiny frame women expected to haul around massive fake melons!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 09:28 PM
1

Are you sure this example is about women though? I remember reading in 'Vagina' by Naomi Wolf that this is the case with the smell of sweat, but only works men to women, not women to men. So men are unaffected by a woman's body odour. EDIT: I mean they are not sexually attracted to a woman's body odour, not that they don't notice if she has BO!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 09:23 PM
8

Yes, desperation is never attractive. I feel it is also our female conditioning to look for a Mr Darcy type, or buy into the beauty and the beast myth.. I have experienced what you are describing and I think it is an attitude thing that we can work to change. Have you read 'Getting to I Do' by Pat Allen? Title sounds douchey but actually she recommends a very different mindset for women, to really expect to receive and to have confidence that you deserve very good treatment. It is quite a big sh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 09:15 PM
24

I was thinking this too, the picture looks like a stock photo...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 08:49 PM
17

Unfortunately arrogance is the price for competence
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 08:48 PM
75

Yes, Jealously of your own offspring is just biology gone wrong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 06:36 PM
70

I heard a story (can't remember the source) about women in an indigenous tribe hearing that western men are attracted to breasts. They fell about laughing and replied "Your men like breasts? but breasts are for babies!" Apparently the men in their tribe did not lust after breasts and the women found it hilarious that western men did. This also could explain why the 'National Geographic' women that he refers to, don't cover their breasts, topless women are not a taboo i guess. I have also read ab…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 06:34 PM
39

Ooh I love this! This is the sort of proposal women should get, thoughtfully planned and a special moment to remember, not a begrudging passive aggressive mess. So pleased for you and very exciting that FDS seems to produce this result! 👍👏
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 07:24 AM
2

Hmm, this has never happened to me. Interesting to hear though as it’s surprising to know it’s possible 🤔 Would you consider them doing this a red flag?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 09:56 PM
7

Ooh that's a good way to think of it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 06:12 PM
1

This is useful to know, yes I am a long way from these things happening right now, but I want to be prepared. I feel like FDS has given me loads of confidence exactly because it is clear on how to behave for the best outcome, it's the intimate aspect of relationships where I have less experience. Thanks!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 06:11 PM
3

I do get what you mean, a single bed would be better for me because of space, but that would mean I would have to stay at a mans place in future, and I didn't love that the last time. Mainly I am interested in the ideas around each option. Like so many things in FDS, small choices demonstrate your standards and boundaries right? So are there connotations for each option that affect how you are treated? E.g Have women noticed better treatment when staying at his of being at your own place? I am a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 06:03 PM
48

Talk less. This one is really difficult for me. Especially avoid talking about mindless things. Make sure that when people talk with you, it is high quality, engaging and memorable. Quality not quantity. I also don’t offer up information or details about myself easily or without reason, better to listen to others. The important thing about this is not to be needing your validation or entertainment from talking, this way you won’t have needy vibes or bore people. I also do various hobbies and hav…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/20 05:20 PM
1

So disturbing that these gross men say they want children someday. I hope they are lying. yr 2030: "So, Dad, what were you like before you had us?"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/20 09:12 PM
13

That 'apology' song 4.44 really bothered me. It seemed like he was using their kids to guilt her into putting up with his behaviour..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/20 08:59 PM
2

It’s nice, I just wish she hadn’t posted it on Twitter in such a gushy way 😕
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 10:33 PM
8

You are right, but don’t get depressed about it! You are so lucky to have found FDS at this age! Study it and the book list etc and you will avoid so many bad experiences, increasing your chances of succeeding in life and also love later on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 10:26 PM
12

Sounds like he has moved on, I would def not give him any more attention.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 10:16 PM
6

Yes but they are not suffering from an oppressive LVM situation. It sounds like they are fulfilled and happy and that they have been able to make these choices for themselves? That is different, yes I am sure they exude positive energy and love themselves! I mean women who feel low and not motivated or able to care for themselves because some LVM is leeching on their energy and failing to share duties.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 10:11 PM
12

If going by 'The Rules', 2 dates in the first week is too much. Also the 2 hr phone call sounds dubious, better to keep them wanting more esp at the start. Good that he initiates, but the moving thing sounds iffy, and you might seem too keen. Maybe don't get hopes up and use it as good experience to train yourself using FDS? Good luck!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 09:23 PM
11

I’ve seen their relationship develop, has been an amazing learning experience. He is a total narcissist, very controlling, she is co dependent. He makes embarrassing jokes about her in front of the whole group, and she says nothing. I am cringing so hard!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 05:56 PM
8

Yes, I imagined older men would be sophisticated, intellectual and generous. I think it is a popular myth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 05:50 PM
3

The handbook won’t have guidance as the recommendation is to avoid OLD. I remember when reading ‘The Rules’ books that they have a section on writing an OLD profile. Main advice is to give very basic details, no inner thoughts/dreams or personal info, no wish lists etc, nothing negative about what you don’t want. Emphasise generic traits that you have... they suggest a ‘screen name’ (it’s quite dated!) that is evocative of or references a celeb you may resemble. The books recommend good pictures…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 05:41 PM
32

As far as I can tell, Women over age 30 can go downhill in terms of looks and confidence. They can gain weight and become unfit, stop making an effort with make up and hair, lose belief in their worth and neglect to foster their interests and hobbies. ‼️The main cause of this is being stressed, under pressure and run off her feet HAVING TO LOOK AFTER A LVM plus his children in an insecure and unpredictable situation. ‼️ Men complain that women go downhill, but mostly they are responsible for it!…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 05:10 PM
42

Feel like I have to say, this does seem so prevalent. A 38 yr old man who showed interest in me recently, a 27yr old, then started dating another 28yr old woman. I would say both me and her also look younger than our ages, more like early 20s. I brushed him off because I found him creepy. Before FDS I used to think age gaps could sometimes be ok, now I am sure it is bad news.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 08:35 AM
35

Whenever I see this issue discussed, it is THIS that the men just cannot grasp.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 07:50 AM
11

Trying to gaslight her into thinking that locking her doors is weird and unreasonable!? She should be glad to receive surprise strangers in the night, they can only have good intentions right?? 🤨
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/20 10:01 PM
20

He didn’t “get the idea” that you would be ok with that, he is trying to create that situation with these actions, then he will probably escalate to taking advantage more.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/20 04:06 PM
3

I actually don’t like talking on the phone myself, some people are just not keen on it. My main issue is that I feel it makes it more difficult to have boundaries, if someone contacts me and arranges a time to have a phone conversation then that is ok, but I don’t want to just be available to talk whenever they fancy. For me it feels similar to them just turning up and expecting you to be free to spend time with them, I’m usually busy and not just on call for people to take up my time whenever t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/20 10:29 AM
28

Yes! years ago I used to be disappointed that men didn’t cat call me, now I know it is because of this! It really is actually a compliment if they are too threatened or seem shy or awkward, they just know they owe you more respect than that!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/20 10:13 AM
40

All of them! I find as soon as you pay he begins to lose interest/respect. I wouldn’t consider it a date if he didn’t plan and pay. If you chip in at all it makes it much more difficult to create a precedent that he pays for you. It can be a slippery slope and it makes every little thing a stress for you, worrying if you should pay this time or if he will.. I feel like LVM are on the lookout for signs that you will pay and then they just push their luck more and more...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/20 09:56 AM
2

Yes, as far as I can tell, you can’t fix these situations, you just have to get out. And ASAP as it effects your self worth and wears you down. Just like LVM !! 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/20 09:46 AM
2

Oh wow, I am sorry. I was starting to notice the beginnings of something similar with my boss too before lockdown, also trying to gaslight and paint me as crazy. I am not going back to that job anymore and reading this tells me it’s the right decision! So sorry as it’s really horrible to go through, just remember it is probably because they are threatened by you- you are probably better than them in some way and they need to discredit you, this is what was happening to me...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/20 09:42 AM
48

Translation: “I hope this eats away at you and destroys your self esteem”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/20 09:09 AM
12

It helps diffuse the feelings so they don’t derail your real life actions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 11:05 AM
141

A man I know in an age gap relationship often refers to the girlfriend as a ‘youngster’ it gives me the creeps!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/20 10:07 PM
5

I have read articles that say economic strain and high rents in big cities is a driver of cohabitation without marriage. I do think fewer women would go for it if they could more easily afford their own place, or a big enough place.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/20 09:38 PM
77

Paint him green = Shrek
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/20 09:22 PM
16

But also, what is the bizarre sideways-bed-slouch-beside-crisp-packets-and-rubbish pic? Does he live in a landfill?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/20 06:55 AM
16

Yes! we should really ask what is fiancee/husband behaviour? Are you seeing currently what you would want from a fiancee, and what more do you expect from a husband? You should be able to expect more from a husband, otherwise you will probs be disappointed if nothing changes after marriage.. Totally agree that putting in effort is a risk.. we do it to receive things in return, but it doesn't guarantee it.. So many women assume that if they give they will receive back what they want, the way they…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 09:41 PM
3

I used to worry that I exuded 'masculine energy' and this was putting men off approaching me. I now just think it's another myth that keeps you feeling inferior. It is probably exactly this insecurity that you are not feminine that is blocking you from feeling fully feminine. Being feminine to me seems like fully naturally embracing yourself without judgement and knowing you deserve love.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 09:26 PM
22

Maybe he sensed she might say no and thought doing it in public would influence the outcome! ew
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 08:53 PM
87

Yes. Not sure how you could find a man who wasn't 'someone's son'.. unless he was a lab grown clone!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 08:51 PM
2

Thanks, yes I am trying to get myself into a rational way of thinking when first assessing men, I want an objective system so I don't let emotions run wild.. actually trying to suppress chemistry maybe until I know he has the right ingredients? Do you think that is possible/useful? Last time I experienced proper chemistry it threw me right off balance!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 06:44 PM
4

Oh thanks, yes good point. I suppose I am talking about what I have observed of them so far (I don't do OLD so these are all IRL acquaintances.) Maybe potential is the wrong word? I will try to think of it differently..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 06:40 PM
15

I notice this often. Waiting in the social distancing supermarket queue the other day a woman in front of me started preening her boyfriend as soon as she saw me... I tried to smile at her but she was clearly threatened. I actually find it uncomfortable when women start up a PDA just because they clock you as a woman alone who looks put together! Surely it is their insecurity and not your responsibility?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 09:13 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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