~ archived since 2018 ~
~ archived since 2018 ~
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 3 | Female Dating Strategy Mega-ThreadI believe there were incel communities that actually called for violence outside of Reddit- at least, the ones who did it in real life claimed to be a part of those communities and had bits in writing about wanting to do such and such, in those forums. She (is this a she?) was comparing those online communities to the FDS online community, stating that in that latter online community, there were no calls for violence, merely- as I understand it- calls for a conscious and voluntary (not involunta… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/05/22 07:05 PM |
| 1 | Female Dating Strategy Mega-ThreadI think they were talking about a lack of calls for violence within FDS specifically, not serial killers. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/05/22 06:17 PM |
| 1 | Female Dating Strategy Mega-ThreadWhen the sex isn’t good. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/05/22 06:15 PM |
| 3 | This post was by a woman and all the comments are by women here. How can we make progress when pickmes are always playing "cool girl"?I don’t know what to do with them, honestly. This “projecting MY values” attitude on humans that have a fundamentally different experience in the world due to having entirely different bodies and socialization (and hence a freedom from a variety of uniquely female concerns) is wild to me. It’s kind of myopic of these women, in that it doesn’t even occur to them that the same feeling of “owing” never even enters a man’s mind when he is given a gift of value, even if that gift is worth thousands i… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/04/22 01:39 PM |
| 69 | Shocking: Man ignores what woman says then for sOmE rEaSOn he has no idea what's going onI wish you’d had this article at the time! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/04/22 07:09 PM |
| 15 | Dealing with being purposefully celibateThat’s a wide assortment of attachments. Is there one you recommend? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/22 05:12 PM |
| 21 | The Bar Is In Hell. The Audacity Is Sky High. I'm Scared For My Generation.I hope this isn’t rude but I am laughing uncontrollably at the remote holder and “library” candle I-Bought-A-Gift-For-You-For-Me gifts. If I didn’t cackle at the absolute audacity, I would cry. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/22 04:20 AM |
| 38 | The Bar Is In Hell. The Audacity Is Sky High. I'm Scared For My Generation.Although, the hands free motion is kind of nice. Perhaps as a thanks to those longer and thicker lashes she has now, she could buy him a strap on! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/22 04:17 AM |
| 122 | The Bar Is In Hell. The Audacity Is Sky High. I'm Scared For My Generation.Oh God I Feel Seen. This was my ex. “What was the point of a massage, if it didn’t shake out in muh sex?” was the message I received, as I felt a penis incessantly poke the small of my back, just as I was getting into a lovely haze. “Oop, relaxation over!”, my old pickme self thought. “Time to get up and pay the piper!” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/22 04:11 AM |
| 139 | The Bar Is In Hell. The Audacity Is Sky High. I'm Scared For My Generation.We would make for much better boyfriends. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/22 04:06 AM |
| 5 | I feel like I need to have a funeralIf I could find FDSers irl, I’d host a ceremony for a group. Perhaps we go out into a field and smash the stuff that represents what we don’t need anymore. Then take some pieces and burn it away. Listen to each other. Teach each other. That would be amazing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/04/22 05:36 AM |
| 14 | The real reason why dating market is full of 🤡 and why 50-50 is such a 🚩As a fellow data hoarder, I feel seen and no longer alone 😄 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/04/22 05:18 AM |
| 31 | The real reason why dating market is full of 🤡 and why 50-50 is such a 🚩It is SO metal. I’m going to look at dating though the lens of the objectives of CockCorp from here on out. Also I’m down to collab on the screenplay for the hit short film WonderScrote ;) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/04/22 03:16 AM |
| 27 | Feelings of loneliness is realOP this does come up in the sub from time to time but, maybe not often enough. It certainly resonates for me, being someone who spends each holiday that is denoted “family oriented”, year after year, alone because my own family is far away and I am no one’s romantic partner, which apparently is the qualifier of being deemed worthy of a seat at the table (I used to have friends who hosted friend events, but they’ve long since scattered). I’m not going to lower my standards for a different kind of… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/04/22 01:28 AM |
| 47 | Feelings of loneliness is realOh, that’s just hospice. The true friendship funerals are the baby showers (unless of course you’re having babies too). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/04/22 01:16 AM |
| 194 | The real reason why dating market is full of 🤡 and why 50-50 is such a 🚩YES 👏🏻 👏🏻👏🏻 1) Where can I hear you speak live? 2) Please also join fourthwavewomen you would be a welcome addition. In response (not so much for you but for those who are new to FDS), I’m going to paraphrase some comments from wiser users yesterday (check out the post on the Quillette article), but effectively- The whole game of female subjugation is to get women to lower their standards, blur their boundaries, and buy into it when the value of female sexuality is artificially lowered via narra… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/04/22 08:12 PM |
| 141 | Interesting first day… even more interesting way of texting“I Need. To Make This. WORK!”, as he slams the square peg into the round hole. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/04/22 03:13 PM |
| 10 | Dating “inequality” “data analysis”-🤣THIS is the content that women dating need to be reading. I hope you will make it its own post! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/04/22 06:23 AM |
| 26 | Dating “inequality” “data analysis”-🤣What I see it as, is as you said, a set of physical characteristics, but beyond that, those physical characteristics serving as packaging for a potential bundle of services she might “do for” him. And yeah, this really has nothing to do with who she is as a person. What men are struggling with are these cultural hand me downs (that are finally falling apart and are largely unwearable), whereby women had no other choice but to accept these raw deals where they are not seen as people, but service … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/04/22 06:10 AM |
| 17 | Dating “inequality” “data analysis”-🤣Huh. I actually didn’t have a real problem with this article, and I love Quillette in general. It lays out the facts. I only take issue with the fatalistic tone, as if for men there is nothing to be done. Here’s something to be done. Men actually do have more control in this situation than they claim. Stop prioritizing asserting dominance over having a healthy, equitable relationship. Recognize the inequities between male and female sexuality, and the imbalance of emotional work in relationships… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/04/22 05:53 AM |
| 365 | Blocking guys you see in daily settingsI understand it’s uncomfortable, but we really have to push through our socialization instinct to prioritize male comfort, and start doing these things for them to learn, not perpetuate the cycle. Men understand consequences. Once you get over the initial awkwardness at the gym, it’ll be ok. If he asks about the block, just put on the audacity of a man- they feel no need to explain or justify their boundaries to a 2 date stranger if they just don’t feel like doing something. Speak to him man to … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/04/22 05:31 AM |
| 91 | Anyone watch Abbott Elementary? Laughed so hard at this hysterical libfem joke in the season 1 finale.It’s wild that men are so deeply socialized as boys to maximize self-benefit, they actually think a movement designed for the benefit of a class of people that isn’t them, should benefit them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/04/22 04:25 PM |
| 28 | Random/ Weird Dating ParallelI like this post and hope it doesn’t get taken down for being a bit hard to read. We haven’t really touched on this kind of embarrassment, either in the personal and professional sense. I hope someone can speak to it beyond the cliche “block and delete”, when it’s not as simple as that, seeing as the old company/guy you kept can absolutely see what you’re doing if they want to (or you just run into each other). I know intellectually one shouldn’t care, but the illogical ego does come into play. … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/04/22 04:19 PM |
| 18 | Thoughts On This “Men Paying On Dates For Them To Look Out For Entitled Women” article??Because his dominance assertion. If you can’t fuck ‘em, fight ‘em. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/04/22 04:38 AM |
| 42 | Thoughts On This “Men Paying On Dates For Them To Look Out For Entitled Women” article??Maybe he wants to set women up in a mentality for unhappy marriages where they take on the invisible, unpaid mental load to prove they’re not entitled, so that they eventually break down and file for divorce. In which case, he knows the perfect guy to take the case. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/04/22 04:33 AM |
| 5 | OLDs are literal hellI thought “low effort gets you low effort” before I even read the second half of your comment! Wild! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/22 08:21 PM |
| 58 | A Porn Producer's Take on Bridgerton and Similar Explicit Shows: They Are No Different From Porn.I don’t think your average porn consumer is going to watch this show for the sex when he can just watch, you know, porn. Masturbation for them is about instant gratification, and that doesn’t allow for a whole story around it. And I don’t find that most men gravitate towards historical dramas unless there is violence. So in my mind, it would actually be no flag (neutral) if he enjoyed this show. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/22 01:49 PM |
| 43 | "Giving away the daughter"The thing about wedding traditions is that, at least in a free country, you can redefine them however you like. It’s all symbolic, and symbols are visual messages. What message do you want to send? If you want to send the message that your dad is your greatest protector and advocate and he’s handing over trust to Mr. Groom who better not fuck it up, you can do that. If that role really only applies to your mom, she can walk you. Or, they can both walk you. After a couple of people, logistically … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/22 01:45 PM |
| 34 | how to make men give up on (controlling) youI am so sorry. So many of us have experienced this. I’m glad you listened to and trusted yourself, and got out. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/22 02:53 AM |
| 114 | how to make men give up on (controlling) youAnd then when that happens, you’re blamed for “choosing wrong”, right? After you do exactly what they told you to do, to stop worrying about. At best, you’re told it’s just bad luck- not systemic at all!- and to sweep it under the rug. Start talking to other women, exposing a systemic pattern? Bingo, now you’re a feminist, and now you’re really bad news, because women are a lot harder to control when not in isolation. The game is rigged that we’re wrong no matter what we do, and no one is lookin… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/22 01:58 AM |
| 224 | how to make men give up on (controlling) youOh you know, the usual “You’ll never get a man if you ‘x’”, as if they actually care whether I get one, and aren’t really just using self-benefitting narrative strategy to try to beat down an ideology like it’s a fire that could spread, and make the bar of entry higher and more work. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/04/22 11:40 PM |
| 38 | OLDs are literal hellYes! I tell women this, and they say “But there is no other way to meet men where I am!” That sucks, it really does, but is it worth poisoning your mental health with exposing yourself to so much male toxicity? Leveling up your life is the way to put yourself in the orbit of HVM (and HVW), and it should be considered an enjoyable process! Plus, we have social media. You can select level ups to put out there for all to see- be it personal or business- and let them come to you! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/04/22 01:11 AM |
| 38 | ladies, how do you hold space for yourself?That’s terrible. I’ve noticed that trend, whereby a man views you more as a service package to “do for him” rather than curiosity towards “who she is”. That’s likely why these men went silent on you and lost their heavy “interest” when you set this standard, because you can’t do as much for them when you are not under the same roof. It’s gonna be tough on OLD. It’s a depersonalized process where the majority seem to be seeking services, while investing as little as possible. So basically, a barg… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/04/22 11:11 PM |
| 33 | and they want women over 30 to just... disappear? hide in a basement somewhere? this queen is goals! title is" why can't I be sexy at 71". LVM in fumes! gross is sexualizing teenagers and 20 somethings and preying on them! gross is drooling over 16 year olds when LVM are their dad's age!There is a lot of disagreement on this woman’s intentions for doing the surgeries and the squat down in 5 inch heels for the camera and other potentially harmful beauty practices in the comments. I’ll just say that at least I have some context via the other suggested videos on this channel (click the little “i”), which include “30 year age gap couple reveal baby surprise” and “my hot gran gets attention from 18 y/o boys”. It’s no wonder that the tone of the video has some antennas up with respec… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/04/22 11:42 PM |
| 20 | and they want women over 30 to just... disappear? hide in a basement somewhere? this queen is goals! title is" why can't I be sexy at 71". LVM in fumes! gross is sexualizing teenagers and 20 somethings and preying on them! gross is drooling over 16 year olds when LVM are their dad's age!Yes, promoting super high heels bothers me. They have nothing to do with having a healthful youthful body and everything to do with the male gaze. Joints deteriorate as we age, they just do, and so they are especially a bad idea for elderly women, but really they’re bad news for anyone of any age. I’m not telling anyone what they can and can’t do. Bleach your hair until it’s breaking off if you want. Get interminable risky plastic surgery procedures if you want. Develop an eating disorder if you… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/04/22 11:32 PM |
| 10 | If I have to see y’all dog women out under the guise of levelling up one more time…Mixed feelings. I get the frustration towards pickmes of undermining an acceptable societal standard by their behavior. But to me personally it’s important to be gentle towards someone who is just struggling to get by, because our society is hard, and deprogramming is hard, and not everyone has the support/tools/abilities/education to level up. They are just living their lives and trying to get by. Where I have a problem is, to varying degrees as you move up the chain (pickmeism is a bit like ML… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/04/22 05:05 AM |
| 389 | Why It Is Dangerous To Be A "Chill Girl" In A World Dominated By Rape CultureWomen just don’t realize the power they have. Imagine if when the “best ass” award was presented, the women present stood up, stared at the presenter, and then quietly walked out, and then all proceeded to cancel their memberships. Now all you have is a men’s club, and the men only have each other to look at and talk to. Doesn’t sound fun, does it? You have all sent the message, knock this shit off, or we do not return, no matter what perks you offer. Women don’t have to bully or rape or assault… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/04/22 07:12 PM |
| 283 | "policing of emotions"?Raise your hand if you’ve heard some iteration of “And then you cry and it makes ME the asshole”. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/22 07:43 PM |
| 196 | thought someone here might benefit from these tips!Hot damn I’m sure creating fantasies about this one 😛 I’m kidding! It’s good advice. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/22 12:54 PM |
| 22 | BE ALERT: Men on TikTok are fantasizing about ways to hurt women on imaginary dates.this is the way. you can speak to her maximizing her benefits, just as men do. she need only to learn that it is in fact possible. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/04/22 03:28 AM |
| 59 | Have you ever seen your threads on FDS being shared in other subs?These are men who are shit on at work- if they have a job at all- and do not feel they are succeeding sexually. With respect from other men being of utmost importance to them, unlikely they have much social status or respect in the male pecking order. The usual paths where a man may assert his might and dominance do not exist for him, and as a lazy chap, instead of leveling up, he takes the easy mode and seeks quick gratification by “owning” women on social media….when he’s not watching porn. Th… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/04/22 05:02 PM |
| 54 | NVM Single DadsHoly fucking shit. Ick factor aside….Tbh this is my fear with dating single dads of minor children. Like now I’m entangled in this parent child relationship but also not really, because we’re just dating, and if anything like this comes up, well, wth do I do? Report it? Tell the mom? Am I obligated to? Am I just starting shit? I don’t know! Grown kids (I’m old enough to date men at that age) or no kids, that’s the only way I can go. Too many complications when they’re still being raised. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/04/22 01:20 AM |
| 22 | Do you sometimes think whether you come across a single and compatible HVM who likes you back is beyond your control more than anything else in life?Lol yes. So limited in their thinking. Talk about setting oneself up for unhappiness, when the answer to so many questions truly is “because penis”. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/04/22 11:58 PM |
| 66 | The amount of pickmes on reddit is too highChOoSe BeTtEr 🤪 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/04/22 09:27 PM |
| 53 | Do you sometimes think whether you come across a single and compatible HVM who likes you back is beyond your control more than anything else in life?Relatable. I was just saying in a different comment that relationships are very important to me, but that I have decentered society’s de facto numero uno, “romantic relationship”. We put way, WAY too much emphasis on these as women, considering the statistically low returns on the high investments we must make. I am open to them with a cishet man (which is why I’m here), but there are so, so many other types of relationships in this world that can nourish our souls that are not sexual. I honestl… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/04/22 09:24 PM |
| 24 | “Dick is low value and abundant” - finally, a lesson learned.This is relatable. I’m in the opening stages of a renaissance for myself in terms of how I view relationships. It’s undeniable that societally, there is a hierarchy, and #1 (well neck and neck with parent/child) is Romantic Relationship. I don’t doubt the biological component, but I also think the social validation of the status upgrade in most of society’s eyes is a huge factor. But I say fuck that. Because also in the eyes of the majority, the drain a husband can be is roundly ignored, so what… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/04/22 03:44 AM |
| 94 | Have you ever witnessed/experiences a LVM turn to a HVM?I have seen it happen, but it really had nothing to do with any kind of Barb the Builder getting him there. He had a traumatic, “rock bottom” event in his life that knocked sense into him and opened his eyes. There is some truth to that “Ebenezer Scrooge” trope, but it isn’t especially common. If it’s going to happen, it’s a switch a man has to come to on his own. Often ties into spirituality- be it one he adopted or one he abandoned- so if you get involved with the reformed, be sure to look int… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/04/22 01:46 AM |
| 13 | Saw this on Twitter and I’m ANGRY, dumb pick meI know what he is giving her that’s easy and small! ba-DUM-dum 🤡 thank you i’ll be here all night 🎤 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/04/22 08:07 PM |
| 32 | Escort only moaned because he paid her. Hope he gets the therapy he needs, but I rly hope his wife will leave his toxic ass too. Many comments are advising him on how to hide his fucked up secret or justifying his infidelity & saying the marriage can be saved. Received ‘the wholesome award’? WtfI don’t think a CPT code exists for this one, clearly not in-network. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/04/22 08:02 PM |
| 42 | Escort only moaned because he paid her. Hope he gets the therapy he needs, but I rly hope his wife will leave his toxic ass too. Many comments are advising him on how to hide his fucked up secret or justifying his infidelity & saying the marriage can be saved. Received ‘the wholesome award’? WtfSome guys you just can’t therapy out the selfish “seeking the best possible deal for myself”. That’s why I negotiate the best possible deal for my self until a man is proven trustworthy. Also no one on Reddit would applaud a woman for this LV behavior. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/04/22 08:00 PM |
| 4 | Pick female doctors whenever possiblelol this can’t be real he’d lose his license. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/04/22 05:24 PM |
| 31 | This level of betrayal from the person supposed to love, cherish and hold you sacred.Hopefully in a relationship where she can afford the fertility tests. Because in comparison to that, the expense of a child….well. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/04/22 04:31 AM |
| 57 | “Many women, I think, resist feminism because it is an agony to be fully conscious of the brutal misogyny which permeates culture, society, and all personal relationships.” • Andrea Dworkin, Our Blood: Prophecies and Discourses on Sexual Politics 🤍👩🏻🤝👩🏾Same. I don’t hate men. I just love women, and their contributions, and want the best possible deal for them, because historically they haven’t gotten it. I just get angry with men when they purposefully stand in the way of her getting said deal. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/03/22 04:38 AM |
| 27 | Genuine question: how can a woman maintain the hope that there really are good men out there?I’d also like to see a cap on male depravity posts. They have value, but balancing them with positive and strategy posts (which can illustrate bad behavior, but then offers a remedy other than “feel bad”), is a good thing, to keep users from feeling too dragged down and sad- imagine being a new visitor and this was all you see. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/03/22 04:12 PM |
| 26 | "I am afraid if I let him pay for dinner & dates OR don't go 50/50 with him OR let him pay for me all the time OR fully provide for me - he will have full control over every aspect of my life because I am financially dependent on him."I have to be honest, I don’t love, as authentic as they may be, comments like “I needed to hear this today”, because they sound like those platitudes from paid commenters on IG that simply validate the post in a noncontroversial way and add nothing to the discussion. But I really don’t know what to say beyond that. I really did need to hear it, after having messed up a bit recently with “the wallet pull” (yes I blocked and deleted after he did not decline). I should’ve instead been assessing his… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/03/22 04:00 PM |
| 394 | If he wanted to, he wouldThat requires effort, and foresight, and attention, and planning, and. That. Is. Beautiful. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/03/22 02:54 AM |
| 354 | Man withholds a 12.5K bonus from his SAHM wife because she didnt share the 200$ she made on Etsy (the first time in 7 years she earned anything). Be careful not to marry miserly men who loathe you.Oh for goodness sake. Just don’t be married then, and outside of court ordered alimony and child support, keep your mon- oh wait. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/03/22 02:52 AM |
| 10 | Is it just me, or is OLD getting even worse?Yes. If they were looking to have children especially, I was like, “Oh. So this is what courtship is like.” I have no doubt it wasn’t about me as a human, as when I’d state that I actually could not biologically have children….mask off! Bye! I will continue my search for free surrogate and childcare management services elsewhere!” Obviously those words were not stated, but the fade occurred and the eagerness dissipated. It’s silly, the feigned interest in how my weekend/week/day was/is/will be, … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/03/22 09:02 PM |
| 3 | Recently posted to Will's Official FB. Thoughts on a man who does what he did then apologizes publicy about his actions?I was waiting for a take like this. I really don’t give a shit about these people. I give a shit about toxic masculinity and being sensitive towards Black women with respect to hair, but in that case I’m talking about ordinary people. I can’t really give much energy to a multimillionaire who has all of the dollars to learn emotional regulation and still can’t do it…who we build up as more than human when at the end of the day even with all that money he’s a mess like most men. Chris Rock, who of… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/03/22 02:47 AM |
| 170 | Is it just me, or is OLD getting even worse?This change drives me nuts. Honestly, I think they removed the filter option because women were using them, coming up empty, and disengaging. I certainly did on OKC, when I was able to filter out every man who was open to one night stands. It’s like they took this feature away as a soft LoWeR yOuR sTaNdArDs to women, but I don’t think it’s working because they’re leaving the apps anyway. At least with the heavy filtering they had a chance that I’d engage, should someone meet the criteria. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/03/22 02:32 AM |
| 115 | Is it just me, or is OLD getting even worse?It is a cultural trend as prior commenter said, but also consider this….if you went over 30, over 35 in that time, you’ll see a downslide in the quality of interactions. This is not to say younger women are “worth more”….it means he always was what he was in terms of how he sees women, but you now get to see him without the facade. It speaks to how most men on OLD (the HVM I know, if they ever did OLD, did it as a lark for a short period because they didn’t need to…they are in short supply!) don… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/03/22 02:10 AM |
| 29 | Ughhhh this excuse making ridiculousness. Sometimes it *is* that simple.I guess what she’s saying is that it isn’t necessarily that he doesn’t want to, it also could mean he simply cannot. Either way, he’s not doing what you need, so does this parsing out actually matter? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/03/22 01:43 AM |
| 65 | I lost track of how many red flags I heard.He has this idea that his strategy will eventually lead to free sex. But it’s really a road to celibacy, and men are not nearly as ok with that as they purport to be. If we split the bill, we are platonic buddies. And he’s not looking for platonic buddies. So, ultimately his angle would be a waste of his OWN time. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/03/22 01:40 AM |
| 80 | Stay. Away. From. These. Bum. Ass. “Estranged”. Single. Dads. (P.S - baby mama? Baby mama?….You mean the woman whom he impregnated and to whom he had two children? Girllll i-) the tomfooleryHaha, think like a smart businessman, baby. Extract value where you can. Those rings never resell for the original amount, but you can still make enough off them to reinvest what you get into self-care. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/03/22 11:12 PM |
| 173 | Stay. Away. From. These. Bum. Ass. “Estranged”. Single. Dads. (P.S - baby mama? Baby mama?….You mean the woman whom he impregnated and to whom he had two children? Girllll i-) the tomfooleryI know this sounds wild, but if you’re doing OLD (which I don’t recommend but do you) and open to single dads, ask before you meet what the living situation is. You would not believe how many are out there still living under the same roof as the mom, yet have the audacity to think you- ostensibly someone who is looking for someone to give your valuable heart and body and efforts to- would find this arrangement acceptable, and who would guiltlessly accept your value, while not being in an equitab… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/03/22 09:44 PM |
| 37 | Don’t let men (or women) shame you for leveraging your looks.I take heed to this, and while I recognize the game, I recognize its unfairness. I do try to make a point, when it comes to things acquired not due to merit but due to a shallow appreciation of my looks, to pass the gains on to those whose character and/or work I admire the most, yet who are disadvantaged by these hierarchies the most. Often if a man gives me something solely on the criteria of him finding me hot, I pass it on to someone whose inner amazingness he would ignore, because she is no… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/03/22 05:41 PM |
| 66 | I cringe. Why are women not allowed to care about the way a man present themselves? Why does he act like men don’t treat women they find unattractive like shit all the time? Also women are not that simple minded, a good looking scrote is still low value. Being HV is not based on mere looks & income.At least the comments are good. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/03/22 08:01 PM |
| 357 | Ofc he blames it on her and not himself“This body made you a daughter. You’re welcome.” Cue the sound of a suitcase handle being pulled up, the click of heels across the floor, the roll of suitcase wheels behind them, the firm closing of a door. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/03/22 11:35 PM |
| 164 | I don’t even know what to say 🤦🏼♀️This is the sound of a suitcase handle being pulled up, heels tapping across the room as the wheels of the suitcase roll behind, and a door firmly closing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/03/22 05:44 PM |
| 34 | Wtf. Do men have anything resembling a conscience??Silver lining- hearing Gail give another on-point dressing down. She shouldn’t have to, but, I’m glad she’s there for us. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/03/22 05:41 PM |
| 3 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 55 - Can Men And Women Be Friends?I guess I’m an outlier. I’ve had great male friends, who want nothing to do with me sexually, but like me as a person. Guess I’m just not that hot 🤷🏻♀️ But seriously. We don’t tend to hang one-on-one once they pair up, unless it’s for a specific reason such as something practical like needing help moving a dresser, advice I am looking to get that is personal and not to be shared outside, or we are doing something that is “our thing” that she or my SO is not interested in. Not unlike my relation… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/03/22 05:23 PM |
| 12 | How to get rid of this school girl crushRemember that it’s not necessarily your logical mind producing thoughts and feelings that are in your best interests. It’s just your brain chemistry out of whack, given that it’s 1,000 years behind in terms of what you actually need right now. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/03/22 03:55 PM |
| 39 | New Op-Ed in the NYT: A Manifesto Against Sex Positivity - "What you get when you liberate sex without liberating women"I could do without paragraph 7, and am generally suspicious of anyone with commentary on the matter who “married young” and has not experienced this phenomenon for themselves. But all in all I am happy this article exists and that this subject matter is finally crawling out from where it has been buried alive and brushing off the dirt, demanding to be seen. I wish I could remember the user here who was doing those incredible FDS drawings. The above imagery would make for an interesting piece. Th… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/03/22 03:49 PM |
| 295 | I'm really interested in how society in your country/culture 'discourages interactions in social spaces'!It works the same with a fat and disheveled old man who wants to talk to the young man that he finds “pretty”, correct? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/03/22 03:18 PM |
| 227 | I'm really interested in how society in your country/culture 'discourages interactions in social spaces'!Right? And if she wasn’t “pretty”, what use is she for pleasant conversation? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/03/22 02:15 PM |
| 22 | Mom gives “Husbands in Training” course to her sonsI had thought what he meant was that there were acts in there he found to be too explicit to discuss at his age? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/03/22 05:47 PM |
| 14 | 🧽 RantHave someone hold any future physical evidence for you. I hope you never ever need it, but just in case. Glad you have the doorbell cam. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/03/22 05:27 PM |
| 5 | Men when they say "it's so sad when women don't want to date and live a little! Men and women need each other because of their differences!"“so he felt in control”. 💯 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/03/22 06:39 AM |
| 28 | How can any one say supporting this industry is ethical when the customers are this openly irresponsible, depraved, & careless? What l read basically translated into, “haha I repetitively exploited women & thank God I got to use a prostitute without repercussions that many of them end up having.” 😥💔I would love to see the narrative pushed that just because we desire something and can do it, does not mean we are intellectually developed enough to do it. We’ve created entire systems for this with respect to certain job fields- training required to practice- and certain everyday things such as driving and in some places/contexts, to use a gun. You must prove you understand you know how to participate safely. But for sex and procreation? Nah, it’s only actual human bodies and minds, and future… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/22 05:15 PM |
| 34 | Men when they say "it's so sad when women don't want to date and live a little! Men and women need each other because of their differences!"I don’t actually think they need it. Most don’t put their all in the humans the sex comes from, as you would if you valued something. I think what they actually need is power (status and validation are tied into that). Sex is just a conduit. And if you are not obtaining power from other areas of life, you’re hard pressed to work hard to land a woman. Because for him, that’s giving up too much power. A lot of men will choose to dehumanize her or fight her to balance that out and not lose too much… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/22 01:57 PM |
| 407 | War on Women vs War on Mennot Ukrainian Also, way to exploit a tragedy as a platform for The Plight of the Untouched Penis. Can’t imagine why the ladies aren’t lined up around the block for some of this good good manipulation | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/22 02:56 AM |
| 95 | Men when they say "it's so sad when women don't want to date and live a little! Men and women need each other because of their differences!"He has to value something before he can claim to need it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/22 02:53 AM |
| 46 | A man wrote a book for women on how to text men to get them to not be absolute trash. I just… what?I would rather consume the razor sharp tips of an entire acre of agave plants than consume a single tip from this book. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/22 02:51 AM |
| 71 | Opinion | Consent is not enough. We need a new sexual ethic.This article is touching on the quiet-part-not-quite-said-aloud….that we need to have more respect for the act of sex, not treat it like it’s just another meal. But it takes its time getting there, doesn’t it. A part of me gets it- this is WaPo, and it’s mainstream, and the mainstream dating cultural narrative is a libfem one. It’s like I can just feel the radfem floating around in there (the mention of the 2nd wave of the 70s is no accident) and I get a strong sense of the author’s restraint. N… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/03/22 07:57 PM |
| 15 | New Secret Service report details growing incel terrorism threatIt’s so odd to me to see this topic randomly pop up on CBS News. Being inherently distrustful of MSM, in response to the randomness of it I can’t help but feel warning bells going off, or feeling suspicious that there is some kind of agenda to influence a cultural shift. Why now? What is the end goal? Is it their way of acknowledging an attack on feminism, and as such is showing low key support for women? Is it an attempt to scare women into being less “difficult” and more “understanding”? As if… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/03/22 04:54 AM |
| 47 | Ginger Dean @lovingmeafterwe on Instagram is an absolute queen. Following her page on healing from narcissistic abuse and codependency saved my life. This post of hers reminding everyone why she makes woc/female specific content and honestly resonates to why I think FDS also is a female only sub. 💜👑Peak eloquence! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/03/22 04:45 AM |
| 81 | Where to meet HVW? (wlw)Honestly I think you gave us great tips. You seem to have a level head here, and if you’re having any issues, I think they are more about where you are, than what you’re doing (though I will say that where I grew up, decades ago, in a small homophobic town, wlw found each other even then, so I think that anywhere in the U.S., these days, while it can still be challenging, it is not entirely hopeless). It makes me aware of the privilege I have in terms of where I live, where there are many queer … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/03/22 04:42 AM |
| -3 | Snoop Dogg’s Daughter, Cori Broadus wanted to end it all 💔❤️🩹. The dangers of colorist hypogamous men:There’s no sense of going back and forth with this indefinitely, but I will address that this had nothing to do with posts needing to center on white women. WOC are disproportionately affected by misogyny and I would hope we agree that this deserves more attention. A search will show there are many posts on FDS centering specifically on colorism in dating, and dating concerns disproportionately affecting WOC such as unfair stereotypes assigned to them by men, and they are valid and their presenc… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/03/22 06:13 PM |
| -7 | Snoop Dogg’s Daughter, Cori Broadus wanted to end it all 💔❤️🩹. The dangers of colorist hypogamous men:Colorism does affect women (and if the post had been very dating centric, I would not have brought any of this up), but primarily women come here for dating strategy. That was the sub’s intent. I like to respect that intent, especially when the sub can be overwhelmed with content addressing misogyny-at-large, which is a topic that consumes an enormous amount of emotional bandwidth (there is a new post today actually that addresses how overwhelming it gets). It is also a topic that naturally flow… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/03/22 05:42 PM |
| 11 | Become of ZERO UTILITY to men in dating.In full agreement here. Yes I have these things, and no you are not automatically entitled to them because I spoke to you for 5 minutes. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/03/22 05:24 PM |
| 83 | Do these shallow men expect us to feel bad for them? I certainly don’t ¯\_(ツ)_/¯I think she might want to take a hard look at her old man and apply the same reasoning. If she dares to. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/03/22 05:22 PM |
| 76 | Guy on IG admits he’s a gold digger with this post 🤮It’s tactical narrative strategy (“negging”) intended to attempt to assert dominance. When there is no strength in an actual argument, the lazy man’s go to is emotional manipulation. Due to those tendencies, your average male Redditor doesn’t have the opportunities to fuck women in order to gain power, so he’ll take the next best thing- fighting women. They’ll invest far more into fighting you, than anything that can actually level up their power in the world. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/03/22 05:19 PM |
| 35 | I haven't had the sex I want eitherLooks like it’s just one person running it and I’m pretty confident the mod is a woman based on post history. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/03/22 02:07 AM |
| 91 | I haven't had the sex I want eitherSure can. And it’s hard for the not celibate people (particularly men) to understand why I’m not out there doing it, when I totally could. Which is like asking me why I’m not drinking at the party, when in fact I enjoy drinking very much, but all I’m finding is Natty Light. While a bunch of other women are pounding it and pretending to love it, I’d rather stay sober than drink that. If something good turns up, I’ll be happy to imbibe and savor the quality. If it doesn’t, I can totally just not d… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/03/22 01:47 AM |
| 63 | Snoop Dogg’s Daughter, Cori Broadus wanted to end it all 💔❤️🩹. The dangers of colorist hypogamous men:I can appreciate this post, but again, I see a lot of this content that really isn’t dating related in any way, and it’s always an opportunity for me to plug the sub fourthwavewomen where overarching cultural issues impacting women (particularly WOC) are addressed. I understand that a lot of people at FDS have never heard of it (which is why posts like this show up here) and that other sub really deserves more engagement on topics such as this one. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/03/22 01:35 AM |
| 6 | Anyone else feel competitive with men?Maybe it’s just me, but I’d be really surprised if anyone here thinks they can definitively give you an answer on what your own motivations are. Journaling and therapy would probably be more helpful. I have no idea why you feel the way you feel- if it’s feeling disturbed by inequity or feeling like you have something to prove or both- but if you’re looking to improve in a particular area, I don’t see the need to spin it in a way that’s going to make you feel contempt (I gathered that from the fi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/03/22 01:25 AM |
| 9 | how men really feel about women centering themWhenever I see men shaming pickme’s, I feel like it must make misogynists’ heads spin. On one hand, man putting woman in place hurdur. On the other hand, he’s advocating for her to decenter men from her life and have a support network, when an LVM would love nothing more than to have her at his beck and call until he’s sick of her. I imagine they find these kinds of remarks from other men too confusing to process and just scroll past. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/22 01:55 PM |
| 29 | how men really feel about women centering themAs if I’m supposed to be a placeholder for her between boyfriends. I can’t believe women actually think it makes sense for friends to accept that treatment. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/22 01:53 PM |
| 201 | Water boarding couldn’t have gotten this confession out of me 😭😭I need to see what these sorority houseboys actually accomplish. But you never see men putting that stuff up on social media. Anyway, why can’t the women do for themselves- with a dues reduction if you’re putting in more than your sisters- and the men do for themselves? If women can figure out how to clean up a lawn or fix a shelf, surely the men can figure out how to make a bag of snacks. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/22 01:23 PM |
| 45 | I’m costume designing a show about a man who leaves his pregnant girlfriend. This is the letter he sends her with no return address…the FDS’er in me HATES this show.Nice poetry and all but unlike child support, it doesn’t buy diapers. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/22 01:19 PM |
| 11 | In group outings, what should we look for in how men treat women and other men?I’ve been through that. Lots of personal attention in a group, less so when we were alone. It was mate guarding. He was less invested in me, than he was in making sure the other men around knew who I “belonged” to. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/22 12:40 PM |
| 108 | In group outings, what should we look for in how men treat women and other men?Lighthearted ribbing of another man is fun if they know each other, but straight up negging meant to cut him down is an immediate no. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/22 01:50 AM |
| 15 | From the tinder subreddit. I have no words.Oh I know this strategy. It’s the old “if you don’t do ‘x’ thing that I like, you will live out my worst nightmare, which is no sex ever again”. It’s about as subtle of a strategy as when my dog thinks he’s being clever by “hiding” under the table with his butt sticking out. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/03/22 12:59 AM |
| 276 | If you don't receive romance, act as if you were a man not receiving sex. Meaning dump. Women need romance like men need sex. It's not our want, it's our need.It’s posts like this that have me thinking that most men and women are fundamentally incompatible under current dating norms. It just isn’t all that visible, because women tend to act on men’s terms as a relationship progresses, in order to keep them. But if women stood their ground as strongly as men do, you would most definitely see splits left and right (until a new norm- that it’s normal for women to prioritize their wants as much as men do). Most women want the emotional investment first be… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/03/22 04:07 PM |
| 19 | Makeup Give UpYou know, this reminds me of a Steve Martin sketch called The Cruel Shoes, that I used to find hilarious in my pre-radfem days. Post radfem, I thought, I get this is commentary on shoe choices so impractical it’s comical but in all reality….where does this guy get off in making a joke of it, when he’s the member of the class of people women wear these shoes for, and/or feel expected to wear under a patriarchal system that he primarily benefits from, being male? I highly doubt you would see such … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/03/22 11:45 PM |
| 123 | Makeup Give UpNot doing it myself, but here to say I respect your choice. However, I have abandoned the expensive, purely aesthetic beauty treatments that do not serve to financially/professionally pay off for me in some way, in favor of using that money to invest in my future (as I do not work in beauty/real estate etc. where it would be applicable, there are far more profitable investments I can make to level up professionally than, say, keratin treatments), so this post is somewhat relatable. ETA: have als… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/03/22 06:23 PM |
| 11 | Rejected by 300 "hot girls", NVM cries about having to settle for "average" girls to get laidThey want so much value, and I’m out here getting shit for expecting him to foot a dinner bill. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/03/22 10:20 PM |
| 37 | Fantasising about fictional menFantasizing over fictional characters is a motivator for me, to be the type of person that attracts such a man or woman, in a hard, hard world, where at times it feels like I barely have the energy to be even more romantically appealing when there is so much neverending shit to do just to maintain the status quo, every single day. It serves as a natural energy booster to do my base level every day, plus my level up work. But, I limit the time spent on fantasy stuff, so I don’t spend so much time… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/03/22 10:14 PM |
| 142 | Detaching from the outcome -- how to keep your heart on the lockdown during early stages of dating a man?Thank you, u/LeaveMeAlone__308! Point 7, the impermanence, was the hardest obstacle for me…to just let go when it’s time, and accept that may be down the road, yet if so, it doesn’t take away from the enjoyable parts of the past. It was this comment by u/thewetdog_, one of the best I’ve ever read on FDS (I encourage all to read it), that helped me with that hurdle more than any other on the forum. As she says, better to be treated like a queen quarterly by 4 different men, than stick around with… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/03/22 07:40 PM |
| 9 | UPDATE: Part 1 of my 3 experience implementing the 3 month rule. I HAVE MADE A HUUUUUGE MISTAKE with cohabitation.I’m not trying to derail here but as literally every other angle to this has already been covered by other users, one question remains in my head- what happened to the puppy? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/03/22 11:15 PM |
| 7 | Middle aged men who “don’t know yet” on dating appsThis is a tactical narrative strategy designed to extract whatever benefits are appealing and on offer from any given scenario, without taking into consideration or having any respect for what you may be looking for, because that’s not the priority. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/03/22 02:23 AM |
| 26 | I love it when scrotes just perfectly illustrate why we need FDS. This is the type of guy you will weed out with the "unreasonable" rules he mentionsI love how he pretends that he doesn’t have the power to bounce on women who don’t put out fast enough….which happens all the time. And that we don’t make Chad wait. Yes. Yes we do. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/02/22 11:05 PM |
| 17 | With access to easy sex, it is up to women to control their n countsThis. Women averse to casual sex, with high self esteem (low self esteem presents its own host of problems in relationships- insecurity, jealousy, lack of emotional regulation) are going to seek a partner with the same values. To state otherwise is just narrative strategy to maximize male personal benefit. A narrative strategy isn’t necessarily spoken truth, it’s just a strategy using words. I get it- “I want all of the sex and do no work for it”. And I want my Barbie dream house. I can come up … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/02/22 05:18 PM |
| 68 | I wonder if these are high expectationsI hear women are entitled and I’m thinking they aren’t entitled enough. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/02/22 03:05 AM |
| 79 | How do you respond to men who ask you to teach them something as an OLD opener?The advice is already here but just so you don’t feel alone, I’ll share that once a man proposed on an app that I assist him for free in drawing up grant applications, which is legit contract work. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/02/22 02:52 AM |
| 150 | Has a man ever left you or started abusing you when something negative happened to your looks?I’m just here to applaud you on your user name. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/02/22 07:39 PM |
| 92 | scrotey man can masturbste ‘for hours’ but can’t hold an erection with his girlfriend. sex columnist advice ‘oh don’t feel ashamed, just communicaaaaate’Did it just say “Might be the porn”? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/02/22 08:45 AM |
| 3 | 🤡This sub would have to be totally committed to sticking it- or rather, ahem, not sticking it- to women….not even casual sex, which plenty of them engage in. It’s the emotional connection part they succeed in turning off, but they’ve still been weak for sex. Let’s show the ladies that this time we mean business, “boys”! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/02/22 03:02 PM |
| 19 | 🤡Ok. There are a lot of women here eager to see the men pull off that sex strike, where they stop pursuing women for a year. So who’s gonna do it? Who’s gonna LARP as a dude trying to organize this? “He” could even start up a subreddit for this! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/02/22 10:03 PM |
| 77 | Divorcee's and DatingI am not sure how to advise so I’ll be interested in what others have to say. I will point out that every man I have dated- once it came up- was very interested in the math part of the divorce. This included someone who apparently thought we were on a date and I thought we were just hanging out as friends (because he asked to “hang out”, not “go on a date”…you know, it’s more “chill” that way I guess). They didn’t really ask about the reasons- “it didn’t work out” usually suffices- but there was… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/02/22 08:39 PM |
| 25 | I could not find ONE comment saying she’s in the right. He expects her to come over on the first date but gets offended when she mentions him paying for tea. A $2 item. 🥴It’s a battle you can’t win, and that tactical narrative strategy is employed to ensure they receive the best deal possible. If you are guilted into gifting him something of value while getting nothing of value in return, by him pretending that your sexuality is not of great value to him and thus he owes nothing (not even gratitude), this conserves his own resources. The worst term that exists for someone attempting to procure transactional sex is a “john”, but of course there are numerous slang… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/02/22 04:40 AM |
| 97 | I could not find ONE comment saying she’s in the right. He expects her to come over on the first date but gets offended when she mentions him paying for tea. A $2 item. 🥴There is this idea perpetuated that access to a woman’s body is not a valuable gift given to men that they will accept happily and guiltlessly. We know it is valuable because- unlike with tea- they would be crushed if they were to find out they could never have access to it again. We also know that they never feel like they “owe” after receiving a gift. We need to change that lie that sex is not incredibly valuable to them and thus like anything of value, obtained through effort….first and forem… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/02/22 11:36 PM |
| 18 | Scrotes and their effects on your lifestyle: FDS observations in the wildDo the women receive coaching for the underlying issues? Any discussion about the health of the relationships? Getting a passion project? Leveling up somehow? Or is it all surface level dietary advice? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/02/22 10:41 AM |
| 158 | Pick-Meisha Wedding RantI do hope not one guest agrees to that $250. Wedding admission fees are not a thing. I hardly know what else to say. I am agog and sorry this all happened. I’m glad you’re ending this friendship. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/02/22 10:35 AM |
| 150 | She "taught her husband a lesson" by not doing his laundry or grocery shopping after he refused to put away a handful of clothes from the dryer, because he's a guy and "not good at communicating". Someone pointed out basically he has no empathy and only reacts if there's consequences for him.Honestly, I could be a better husband than this. Wouldn’t have to talk about me like I’m a little kid still learning, she’d be stunned by how I can wash dry AND fold….and even iron! 😱 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/02/22 10:19 AM |
| 1 | Have people here heard of Norah Vincent, the woman who went undercover as a man for more than a year and wrote a book about it?There is always the opportunity to see women for who they are. It does not have to depend on whether you are related or romantically involved. The more mentally developed they are- which may or may not correlate with an initial attraction to them- the more they will appreciate this. As Barry said, the world is more than you + men + women who have/have not rejected you as a romantic partner. Platonic friendships with women are valuable. They may introduce you to other women. You may learn somethi… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/02/22 09:22 PM |
| 1 | Have people here heard of Norah Vincent, the woman who went undercover as a man for more than a year and wrote a book about it?To his first point, as a supporter of UBI, I believe that humans have the right to what they need to live…especially if unable to work. The “Poor Minority” is concerned with living expenses. This makes sense. I believe in a level of entitlement to that. I do not see access to the bodies of other people as under that umbrella, or even friendships or the social status that another person romantically choosing you provides. If one is so intolerable they create chaos and damage wherever they go, the… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/02/22 08:26 PM |
| 1 | Have people here heard of Norah Vincent, the woman who went undercover as a man for more than a year and wrote a book about it?Re: abusive men who get women, that happens. I am not sure if you are saying that a relationship as an abuser (with likely a very mentally unhealthy woman) is a level up from none at all? Or that he should have said that celibate men are less bad for dehumanizing tendencies because they “have it worse”? You can still create plenty of damage without having sex (and hurt your chances with connecting with people, if they sense you don’t see them as people). And when the time comes where you do have… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/02/22 06:19 PM |
| 1 | Have people here heard of Norah Vincent, the woman who went undercover as a man for more than a year and wrote a book about it?Forget about me. What value and therefore of what consequence is there in anything I say anyway (at least, currently)? On topic, what do you think about what HE said? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/02/22 05:05 PM |
| 1 | Have people here heard of Norah Vincent, the woman who went undercover as a man for more than a year and wrote a book about it?To put things back on the rails, is that what you gathered from what he said? That having problems means you’re an asshole? Where in the video is that said? What do you think about what he said about what men are taught to believe? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/02/22 04:56 PM |
| 1 | Have people here heard of Norah Vincent, the woman who went undercover as a man for more than a year and wrote a book about it?First things first, did you watch? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/02/22 04:01 PM |
| 16 | Pornsick Scrotes Want Their Money Back!I love comments like this, that expand beyond fury and laughs, and really plainly lay out the foundations at play here. I do it often, and of course damn near every woman feels the need to remind me that it’s “no justification”, which is exhausting, because of course it’s not. What we are addressing is that the differences between what biological foundations are, and are not, tolerated in manifested behaviors….is by social norms/what we will exact consequences for as a society. The education of … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/02/22 03:44 PM |
| 2 | It's okay to be angryHow odd that I stumbled on this immediately after defending anger on fourthwave. I want to repost what I said there in dialogue with a woman who is against that anger. I recognize that this is a dating sub and what I’m talking about is a broader context, but I do think it applies to dating, in having the right to feel anger even when you’re being bamboozled, much less in dangerous situations. For me, it’s never about revenge/settling scores, it’s about fuel to defend myself and my bare minimum s… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/02/22 03:30 PM |
| 6 | It’s that time of the month, ladies! I mean when men on PPD try to justify creeping on 18 year olds, of course.“I utilize social issues I don’t actually give a shit about- that addressed exploitation and oppression as part of their narrative- as tools for platforming exploitation I would like to engage in. I will do so with all the bravado and lack of self-reflection of a child, to have 0 accountability.” “Sexy yes? Touch pp? 🥺🙏🏻” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/02/22 06:13 AM |
| 20 | Man Deducted $1 From Fiancee's Valentine's Day Gift Every Time She YelledProbably staged but nonetheless she’s participating in this LV shit. If only I could make myself as small as a fly I’d just buzz around their heads and whisper “You don’t need it girl. You really don’t. Principles before penis.” Incessantly. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/02/22 06:01 AM |
| 28 | Valentine’s Day cringeMen used to dress quite dapper. They’re entirely capable as beings of doing it. No heels, no waist cinchers, nothing painful to wear. If it’s hot, remove the jacket, that’s fine. They did it because it was socially expected of them. If a dress code became a new social expectation not just for formal events or nice venues, but just for dates in order to have access to female bodies- just as was done 100 years ago- the ones you want would oblige, the rest would self-select out. Most men take the p… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/02/22 05:54 AM |
| 29 | Feminist Realism: An IntroductionAh-yeeeee do I have to choose between FDS and radfem? Can I settle for Feminist Realistic Liberation? In my mind it’s where smaller changes are implemented in the short term while also with an eye on long-term plans. Some of which we won’t be alive to see come to fruition, but, you know, “laying the groundwork” and such. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/02/22 07:38 AM |
| 11 | Blocking is empowering yet drainingHow do I feel? Same as you. I’m grateful for the knowledge of the nature of men, but it can be painful to have it. It is painful to see how many still do not have that knowledge. Also still grieving the death of my older, more hopeful, but more naive perspective. Happiness comes in seeing the numbers grow in who does have the knowledge. And when men shock me by being HV. Just knowing they do exist is some solace. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/02/22 07:30 AM |
| 53 | The relationship subs have delivered on my expectations for Valentine's Scrotery but this one really hit me for some reason. I think its the massive cope at the end.Exactly. She’s projecting on him and pretending he shares her values and intentions, when his actions do not indicate this. If she mirrored him emotionally, things would get stale real quick. She knows she’s holding it all together and is stuck in the sunk cost trap. Sad she thinks she needs to be partnered. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/02/22 07:24 AM |
| 50 | Some of the most telling screenshots from men from that front page post about 🌽⭐️s needing to face the ‘consequences of their actions’. Men don’t think coercion exists on ‘big name’ websites and think sex work = any other industry, ignoring that exploitation is a key feature, not a bug, of pornToo few men will help and women are just not scary enough, is the problem. There are not harsh enough consequences that men can understand. The reason they don’t bust into strip clubs demanding free admission and dances as is their right, is because the establishments are male run and if they pulled that stunt they’d be tossed out by a man 3 times their size. And that would hurt and be embarrassing. We see this narrative in our media. We accept these social expectations as the norm. If this kind… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/02/22 07:15 AM |
| 55 | Some of the most telling screenshots from men from that front page post about 🌽⭐️s needing to face the ‘consequences of their actions’. Men don’t think coercion exists on ‘big name’ websites and think sex work = any other industry, ignoring that exploitation is a key feature, not a bug, of pornBoss exploiting you at your entry level job? YoU cHoSe It BrO They get into these not-so-transparent Lust and Disgust “I hate but I crave” dialogues when “WAHMENZ! Me no LIEK! 🤬 Tuch pp tho? 🥺🙏🏻” would get them the same approval. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/02/22 07:09 AM |
| 190 | I wouldn't know how to treat an HVMThis is actually a really good question. I have always followed the model of asking if the person wants comfort or solutions, and have never excluded deserving romantic partners from this choice or deemed them unworthy of it. It goes without saying that the comfort does have to transform to solutions eventually, but it’s ok to have that time to process. I also maintain that I do not think there is a man on the planet that has 0 potential of having a freak out ever (barring a cloistered monk devo… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/02/22 07:04 AM |
| 2 | Have people here heard of Norah Vincent, the woman who went undercover as a man for more than a year and wrote a book about it?I can appreciate that they are sad, but I have always said that your rights end where another’s begin. And there is definitely a lack of respect for boundaries (and a strong sense of entitlement for access to women) with a lot of these guys (his analogy for setting a boundary being akin to being entitled to abuse was outrageous). It makes it unsafe for women to get too closely involved. Feminine directs in when hurt, masculine directs out. Those aforementioned traits, combined with rage towards … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/02/22 06:44 AM |
| 0 | Have people here heard of Norah Vincent, the woman who went undercover as a man for more than a year and wrote a book about it?The whole comment right above yours is such a black and white thinking mental health mess of “Women! I don’ like ‘em! They ALL have these xyz character flaws!”, riddled with violations of rules 1, 2, and 6, entitlement to the energy of others, and totally devoid of empathy for the very real lived experience of beings subject to predatory behaviors (far more of a threat than rejection…I wish I was sexually rejected more- it is a sign of discerning taste!) that he labels as “struggling with someth… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/02/22 11:45 PM |
| 0 | Have people here heard of Norah Vincent, the woman who went undercover as a man for more than a year and wrote a book about it?Interesting. Idealization is bad. This very good or very bad with no shades of grey ties into that whole Madonna/Whore thing. Or black and white thinking, the hallmark of BPD. I see men idealize other men too, because they excel at athletics or something, even if the men are trash towards people the fan does not know. So they really don’t deserve it, no matter how talented. Then fan meets their hero and there is a perceived slight, and now that hero who could do no wrong, unequivocally sucks and… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/02/22 10:20 PM |
| 2 | Have people here heard of Norah Vincent, the woman who went undercover as a man for more than a year and wrote a book about it?Yes or No: Do you believe, at the core, you see said “cunts” that feel bad- or obsequious women that feel good- to be all the way human? i.e. were it not for sex, would you have anything to do with women, outside of life necessities? I don’t have the GRRRRR coursing through my veins to be devoting energy to asserting Dominance (even if I did, I would allocate it to higher ROI goals)….so that’s not the deal here. Genuinely asking if “Yes”, or “No”. There is no wrong answer, but hopefully it is no… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/02/22 09:34 PM |
| 74 | Male depravity makes it to the front page.When it comes to random strangers approaching, we talk to men who have girlfriends because it feels safer, as we’re working under the assumption that nothing will be expected of us sexually or romantically. If men are out here guiltlessly using these strategies, it behooves us to ruthlessly use our own. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/02/22 04:10 PM |
| 27 | Heartbreaking…long con revenge plan by scroteSomeone above said this might be fake and if so that pisses me off, that someone would waste time to get a rise out of people. Spark up the misogyny in misogynists, make women even more distrustful of men (is there some secret population control agenda attempting to ensure we do not sexually interact?)….and on top of that, inspire distrust in police with the basis being a story that is not real. I guess the only takeaway is that if you’re going to do this, you go with a friend as a witness, you … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/02/22 04:04 PM |
| 4 | What’s your take on this advice: telling a new man you’re dating all the ways your ex treated you well and that it ended because on cheating? She says it will let the man know that your standards are high and nothing could make you put up with it.Tell him how excellently you were treated, so that it is crystal clear that you are accustomed to quality treatment and have never/will never settle for less. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/02/22 04:43 AM |
| 55 | Half time show50 cent now 50 dollar | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/02/22 04:14 AM |
| 31 | "Liberated: the new sexual revolution" on NetflixGlad to see it. Too often, sexual assaults are treated like these isolated incidents that exist in a vacuum, unique to the unlucky victim, and at worst, a result of her “choosing wrong”. The fact that there are so many assaulters and would-be assaulters just out there, existing, is roundly ignored. Because then that leads to the question of “Why is that?”, and now we have to examine the overarching societal structure that at worst, encourages such behavior and at best, tolerates it by looking th… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/02/22 11:02 PM |
| 143 | He’s really dumbfounded, guys. He really has no words.Unpopular opinion perhaps but I really don’t understand the need to neg him on his low effort when you know you’re never going out anyway. Why not just at most say “I am not interested”, and then unmatch/block him? ETA- We know this is done in the wild, but why would we post this here? Handbook before posting. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/02/22 10:24 PM |
| 9 | This is why you never send nudes. Doesn't matter if you were together for 1 year, or 10 years. In most cases, your intimate photos WILL be weaponized.Yeah it’s too late. You can’t put your life on hold for that. You just break up, knowing there could be some blowback, and know for next time. Maybe she can grey rock him by swallowing pride and insisting he can do way better, “prove” that, get him to initiate the breakup, block and delete, and hopefully he forgets all about her. I’ve seen it work. Nudes could be a nice private thing. Men ruin things for each other, then expect women to fix it, never holding each other accountable. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/02/22 05:29 PM |
| 12 | on beauty standards and wanting to opt out, way way outThat whole paragraph as to how you are confused that you are saying a thing and it isn’t landing? You need to watch this clip. It’s at the heart of all of this. Imagine if an appliance or tool suddenly expressed its own will. How much credence would you give it? These guys don’t see you as a person. When you start showing signs of personal agency, their drive to assert dominance to make that STOP kicks in. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/02/22 08:57 PM |
| 41 | Good LuckIt’s never about needing sex, ladies. It’s about needing power, control, and to assert dominance. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/02/22 05:51 AM |
| 76 | Seen in a medical sub. Thankfully the replies were very supportive; I hope she will be OKIt wasn’t about sex. It was about power, control, and asserting dominance. If he’d put in half the effort he put into asserting dominance, into strategy that would actually afford him some kind of physical intimacy (even if not sexual) in the short term, and secure him sex in the long term post-recovery…. then it’s about sex. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/02/22 05:43 AM |
| 43 | Seen in a medical sub. Thankfully the replies were very supportive; I hope she will be OK“We need” translation- “I want. Me first. Gimme.” And now she has two children. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/02/22 05:39 AM |
| 150 | Woman finds son watching porn. Asks other women advice for more "ethical" options. 🤦🏼♀️Don’t forget “grass fed”, can’t be having any big girls. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/02/22 05:31 AM |
| 1 | Do men and women (straight) actually want LTRs nowadays?Your feelings are entirely valid, and I love this comment, addressing how the guy used tactical narrative strategy for the purpose of “do it my way”. And the myopia is so strong, there isn’t even the recognition that biologically we are not “samesies”, and thus this strategy does not work as a power move on women who have established healthy boundaries. Actually seeing women as people and as such, exploring what narratives might actually appeal to them, would be far more effective. It’s like the… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/02/22 05:49 PM |
| 57 | Thoughts on a particular sort of female-perpetuated misogynyIf men “need” sex, why don’t they do everything in their power to get it, instead of these lazy dates that will get them nowhere? Because they don’t need it. What they need is power, social validation, and to assert dominance. Sex is just a conduit. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/02/22 07:06 PM |
| 69 | I’ve seen so many of these, the entitlement is real. No one wants to be your live in bang maid, especially not for FREE!! They’re hoping to take advantage of a woman in need, forget that women can room with eachother without the expectation of chores and sex. We don’t need men like this1: Why redact the numbers? 2: Shelters for women and children are safer than this. 3: What a confidence booster! If Owen, 44, has the confidence to pull this scam, what’s stopping me from letting this jacked guy who’s been hitting me up take me out to dinner? 🤷🏻♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/02/22 07:02 PM |
| 123 | I’ve seen so many of these, the entitlement is real. No one wants to be your live in bang maid, especially not for FREE!! They’re hoping to take advantage of a woman in need, forget that women can room with eachother without the expectation of chores and sex. We don’t need men like thisThat’s the thing. That’s how they learn. Fear of consequences. Honestly, you’d have to have it in you to kill and/or have lightning fast ninja level reflexes with a taser or knife on you whenever you sleep, for when he invariably walks into your room in the middle of the night. I’ve been inside women’s shelters. As long as you mind your business and don’t get into it with other residents, they are safer than this. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/02/22 06:58 PM |
| 153 | How to win in family court: a PSA from a lawyer.Quality post! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/02/22 06:46 PM |
| 47 | A man will date you for weeks, have you be exclusive with him JUST to have sex and leave as soon as he gets it. This scares the hell out of me about dating, I wonder how one can vet this kind of behavior.Oh girl. I’m seeing it. And being like, “Why are you validating those men, THEY WILL NEVER DO THAT FOR YOU”. They probably ban us because the sub is run by men who don’t want us “putting ideas” into the ladies’ pretty little heads. I actually want angry men to talk about us where women can see, to drive traffic over here. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/02/22 11:37 PM |
| 49 | A man will date you for weeks, have you be exclusive with him JUST to have sex and leave as soon as he gets it. This scares the hell out of me about dating, I wonder how one can vet this kind of behavior.Oh, TIL that dating is yet another one of the subs that permabans FDS! Translation: permabans women self-advocating. Anyway, if I had to guess, there is something going on with erectile dysfunction, but I can’t put my finger on it. Maybe he is more attracted to men? Maybe there was an issue having to do with her body? In any case, this is why I don’t go from makeout to PIV. There is an in between stage where it’s oral (for me only), so I lower my sexual risk, I get a sense of whether he can plea… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/02/22 10:28 PM |
| 35 | this woman is a “love coach” she’s literally paid to say shit like this and scrotes are all over this shit 🤣And that’s why I don’t take the lead and ask them out. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/02/22 01:25 AM |
| 19 | Are most high value women “doomed”?I love this comment so much. I have a tendency to be afraid to get involved because of the high chance of inevitable disappointment. But I have to remember the enjoyable moments I experienced prior to that, and that they have value. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/02/22 01:08 AM |
| 13 | Ladies, take care of yourself because no man ever will!I know, I know. It’s not a reason to excuse antisocial behavior. Like I said, we can definitely override biological leanings towards certain practices….and we should, or we’d all eat donuts for breakfast. I actually saw Saul (the emotionally developed stray cat) as proof that an animal could be more evolved than the dumdum bruiser toms who couldn’t do jack beyond eat, sleep, screw, and fight (and Saul benefitted….I consistently gave him preferential feeding and safety treatment). It just helps m… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/22 03:31 PM |
| 16 | Ladies, take care of yourself because no man ever will!Huh. That’s a really interesting take. It made me think about the pretty significant stray population we had out back (while we ran a proactive TnR operation). I would observe their interactions and there was this deal where cooperative social dynamics would change if one cat was sick or injured….there was this strong avoidance from the male cats (who sometimes had companions but rarely showed warmth in general) towards any other who was unwell...it would be the female cats that would stick with… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/22 01:38 PM |
| 30 | A Dude leads her on for 2.5 months leeching her emotionally daily saying he wants to take things slow. Of course the advice is to *communicate* and talk to him honestly.Wait. Is it just me having difficulty, or is it fair to say…how does anyone even make enough sense of this rambling, disjointed post to even give any advice in the first place? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/22 03:39 AM |
| 98 | Ladies, take care of yourself because no man ever will!Like calling the repair shop to see if your appliance is in working order yet 🙄 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/22 03:30 AM |
| 296 | Ladies, take care of yourself because no man ever will!It is so true, the real test comes when the opportunity to show empathy and perform an even mildly inconvenient (if that’s what we would call “something that does not benefit him”) act of service (and this isn’t even a tough one…bringing you soup/medicine is hardly on the level of physical labor like helping you paint your living room, or move!), is presented, and the man declines. And in such a spineless way too…feigned memory loss is right in line with weaponized incompetence. If he wasn’t up … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/02/22 09:49 PM |
| 175 | I love herPlease tell me the comments were supportive. Otherwise a rescue mission is in order. This brother is a POS who doesn’t even see his sister as fully human, but like some kind of traded livestock that is to have 0 agency, and the gaslighting here is peak. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/02/22 01:07 AM |
| 31 | Spotted this ad under "housing" on craigslist 😬“people who are easily exploited new to the country” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/22 04:45 AM |
| 522 | A very discouraging thread on Reddit about a woman's BF wanting her to starting wearing more slutty clothes because...I want to start a satirical and cathartic sub called r/ communicate where I just write up the most ludicrous scenarios that would clearly call for cutting someone out of one’s life (or scenarios where dialogue is wholly not applicable such as with pets or inanimate objects), but instead, gaslighter subscribers reply with maddeningly piss poor but hilarious “just communicate” themed advice. Like shittyaskscience except for interpersonal relationships. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/22 04:30 AM |
| 58 | This is what we face. You are a real woman.One thing they got right here is that perfectly tailored baller pantsuit. I wanna rock that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/22 04:22 AM |
| 53 | How to be more assertive the FDS way?Working in a union workplace, I learned from the president who bargained on my behalf. I told her she did a great job, and she said that there is merit to the idea that it is often easier to advocate for those who are not yourself, because from the outside you can see things more objectively and the stakes are lower for an outside party. I modified this and have sort of an alter ego that I call The Advocate. Beyoncé had her Sasha, when she needed boldness on stage, and I have this. Mind you, I s… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/02/22 02:23 AM |
| 139 | 4 months and she realized she was a placeholder when he had to show basic effort. That's why vetting is important.Imagine the unwasted months on him had there been no sleepovers until they were exclusive. With no sex, this one would’ve dipped on her after 4 dates max, and there may have been a better guy to spend the birthday with. Or at least not the stress over him, because he would be long since forgotten. Ladies, take heed. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/02/22 02:09 AM |
| 51 | Reasons I changed my mind on having children and all the aspects of motherhood society does not want to acknowledge:Thanks for this post. This resonates with me. I too love children, and believe I can serve as an excellent role model for them. However, I feel no pull to birth them that is strong enough to justify potentially compromising my body’s health, nor outweigh the uncertainty of the planet’s near future. I do feel the pull to raise them, and there are so many existing children that need that guidance. I too am exploring adoption. I know it is expensive. But so is IVF, which would be likely for me. The… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/02/22 02:01 AM |
| 3 | Staying safe on OLDThey have for me, when they were serious 🤷🏻♀️ Moreover, I’m willing to do it myself. I could pull up my own up to date results from the clinic’s portal right now; it’s quite easy. I wouldn’t want to date someone who cannot manage the same level of practical responsibility as me. Probably you haven’t met anyone who does this, because women don’t insist…and that fear of setting basic, reasonable standards for men is what we are trying to overcome here. Look at all the changes we made in 2020 in t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/01/22 10:55 AM |
| 18 | Super Bowl SundayJust letting you know you’re not alone here. Although they are not my team, I am very proud of how far the Bengals have come, considering their history. It is bittersweet for me because I am so invested in my own team as it is something my entire family has gotten together for since I was little (and they got so very close this year!), but I still look forward to rooting for Cincinnati. Plus I don’t want to miss Mary J. Blige at halftime. Love her. My Super Bowl requirements are that we make the… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/01/22 03:47 AM |
| 61 | He accused me of being a “gold digger” and threatened to end the relationship after me not wanting to put out on date #5. It backfired. How grey rocking can protect you!!!translation: “i want someone who is so weak willed and desperate such that she will disregard her own safety and well-being. i expect that when i put money in a woman, sex falls out”. ok my man. they’re out there! Also with his bit about being “used”, in what world has a man who is freely offered a valuable sexual investment ever believed that in exchange he “owed” the woman his emotional investment? Thank you for holding firm. I hope this means that he won’t pull this shit with the next unsuspe… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/01/22 03:31 AM |
| 53 | Getting to see men's true colors after some pictures of me were used in an advertising campaign.I’m sorry it made you feel this way. It is so important that women be seen as autonomous human beings with complex inner lives! If more men would simply even take the time to try to perceive us this way, it would take them further in regards to romantic opportunities. Objectification just causes grief- for the woman to be sure, but for him as well as likely she either suffers from low self-esteem (which is a drain), or intends to scam him. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/01/22 04:37 PM |
| 200 | Getting to see men's true colors after some pictures of me were used in an advertising campaign.My takeaways- So many, if not most, of them do not see us as people, but blank slates to project on. Like coveted objects….maybe pets on a more charitable day. 2- If he wanted to, he would. Grossness aside, look at the lengths some of these men were willing to go to when they have their mind set on something. No one is offering me flights and hotels sight unseen, but I’ve certainly been considered “worthy” before of a quality first date, and I see no reason to settle for less….even if I never go… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/01/22 04:23 PM |
| 33 | Staying safe on OLDI feel like too many women don’t even think of this, but before you have sex for the first time, you want to get his STD results (with HSV 1 and 2 specifically requested if you yourself are negative for those, as it’s not automatically included in the standard battery of tests….don’t get me started) from him. I always hear He CoUlD dOcToR tHeM and yes, you could end up with one of the true total sociopaths out there who is specifically out to target you and no other target will do. But honestly,… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/01/22 02:54 PM |
| 29 | You've heard of men with podcasts: meet the ladies with a podcast (today's episode: balding)Oh, they understand the concept alright. Especially pro-union men, who can easily wrap their heads around the concept of the exploitation of workers’ bodies by a dominant management class. It’s that they don’t see us as much “human” as they are. As such, they do not see us as worthy of matching their behaviors, and believe they are entitled to dominating us. There are emotionally mature men who truly see us as people, but as for the majority, I believe at best we are subconsciously viewed as one… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/01/22 11:27 PM |
| 85 | You've heard of men with podcasts: meet the ladies with a podcast (today's episode: balding)Until recently, true, we haven’t bitten back. And now women are, and they don’t like it. What we did (and what many women continue to do), is complain, explain, try to appeal to logic and reason, and beg for empathy, or try to fit into a mold that pleases them….anything but to bite back because we have been so fearful of upsetting them. All the while, men gleefully watch women waste emotional labor stemming from hope for a change those men know they’ll never deliver. Men don’t experience that fe… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/01/22 07:00 PM |
| 334 | People in the comments are debating whether or not this is a good thing 🤡Seriously. It’s like a baby discovering his toes. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/01/22 05:31 AM |
| 218 | Y'all, they're talking about us again 😂Break up with her then 🤷🏻♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/01/22 03:02 AM |
| 39 | If This Is a War, the First Campaign Should Be . . .I’d take that chance. That’s social movements, some activists get hurt. But you can’t reap the benefits of meaningful change without that risk. My sisters that came before me to win the rights I enjoy now had to go through some real shit. Yes, there would be retaliation. Worst case- women carry whatever safety devices we feel comfortable with, hope for the best, use the male instinct to protect “their” women as a tool to our advantage as extra safety, then report to law enforcement any transgres… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/01/22 12:19 AM |
| 13 | Really?!? Still years later they’re dragging her.For that to happen, I think Kim would have to betray her mother, the puppetmaster. I’m not sure she would be that candid while Kris is still alive. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/01/22 08:15 AM |
| 5 | Play stupid games, win stupid prizesOk, which one of you trolls wrote this 😅 But seriously, I feel bad for the boy. He’s become this symbol for the half-siblings to project their anger on to, and has an absentee mom…and did nothing but be born. Poor little fella. I hope to God the jerk at least raises this kid to be better than he was. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/01/22 07:58 AM |
| 46 | you're not toxic.This post fucking rules. Especially the final paragraph. Ladies, be grateful that we’re at this point, one I never thought we’d get to, even 15 years ago. Pickmes will always be, but I do feel a shift that didn’t exist 5 years back in terms of candid dialogue about how dating culture has degraded far beyond a point that can be considered acceptable. Stuff we used to feel like we weren’t allowed to say. When it used to be that you had to just agree to whatever, for fear of being backfooted into o… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/01/22 09:03 PM |
| 31 | Being single protects men from drama and politics, ladies. Leave them alone.Oh. “Cats”. How original. Also, gonna need that Febreze, man. As for Tinder? Hopefully you’re looking for other men. Make a strong choice and actually avoid women. Leave us be. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/01/22 08:50 PM |
| 154 | No second date, so he wants moneyThis was, of course, not actually reasonable, but just male strategy employed to maximize his benefits. And of course, the best way is to block and delete. However, if she did respond with, “How about a sexual encounter instead?”, this man would totally respond with “yes”. And a sexual encounter with a healthy woman is worth at least hundreds of dollars. What does this tell us? It tells us that men will happily, guiltlessly accept any and all gifts freely given, without thinking for a moment tha… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/01/22 08:37 PM |
| 33 | Man Sues Woman After She Refused To Have Sex😂Ugh. This whole thing is gross. Shame and lying and extortion and superficiality and just the worst of people. I can’t believe they agreed to air this all to the public. That being said, know that if the genders were reversed, a man wouldn’t hesitate to guiltlessly accept anything he is offered. This business was a bit extreme what with the lying about the trip and such, but in general, do not feel guilty about his investments in you. He does not feel that about whatever you offer him. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/01/22 03:24 AM |
| 121 | I cleaned my period mess so his mom didn't have to: AVOID MAMAS BOYS AT ALL COSTS.Ah yes, the ol’ backfooting strategy, where they attempt to make you feel incompetent/inadequate so that, to “prove them wrong”, you’ll deliver extra. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/01/22 08:13 PM |
| 14 | he has abs and attends uni, so because of this he believes he should be drowning in attractive women. proceeds to whine for several paragraphs“I would like to be courted and wooed like a sweet prince, by the girl(s) I was promised as a boy, only switching into my masculine energy when it’s time to push for sex.” That’s the long and short of it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/01/22 04:48 AM |
| 7 | Are men seriously trying to normalize erectile dysfunction now??? 😬😬The difference between how, say, gambling addiction and porn addiction is that we expect those impacted by the out of control gambling- the bill collector, the casino- to be ruthless and unforgiving about the debts. Meanwhile, those impacted by out of control porn usage- namely, women- are expected to let the credit build and build and to “bend” to the impact of debts. The backlash I am seeing to women saying “no more” is like the backlash I saw when bars and restaurants said “no more” to indoor… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/01/22 04:44 AM |
| 2 | Is it really worth trying to help PickMes?The podcast has a good episode on this topic, Lilith especially addresses strategy. Check that out. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/01/22 04:26 AM |
| 27 | Unhinged stalker believes I’m someone else or her friend. Threatens to keep calling me until I give him her number. Creates new numbers each time I block.I hear you. But for all the shade it gets here I vote TwoX as most improved for 2021; lately they’re pretty good about clear cut abuse like this. Fourthwavewomen is very supportive too, but that is more geared towards overarching societal issues than personal circumstances (still I mention them as I’d love to see them grow). AskFDS is also great, forgot about that one. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/01/22 07:07 PM |
| 117 | Unhinged stalker believes I’m someone else or her friend. Threatens to keep calling me until I give him her number. Creates new numbers each time I block.Yes. I warned I would get the police involved and file a restraining order. That was enough. I didn’t need to go through with it. This might be more appropriate for TwoX or GirlsGuide though since it’s not related to dating strategy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/01/22 06:34 PM |
| 69 | The unsustainable level of the human population on Earth is a direct result of enslaving the natural gatekeepers of reproduction: women.This is a good point. And if all women embraced general FDS principles (and lived in societies where they may do so without major threats to their person), this would be such a win to hitting a hard reset on our overpopulated world, and would greatly reduce childhood trauma. There is pretty significant growth in antinatalism/selective natalism philosophies. Given that, even with the strong MeN nEeD sEx cultural narrative, I’m a little surprised that with all of the outside media coverage of FDS,… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/01/22 03:54 AM |
| 82 | How are men so obsessed with sex and yet still SO BAD at it??All of what was said above, but I want to add one more thing...is that women who desperately seek male validation and want to avoid conflict with men are not honest with the man about his performance. Then he goes on believing he’s a stud, and you’re fucking things up for the next woman. I get it- an honest poor review is often not well received, especially when trust has not yet been established...which is common, given there are so many men who want the sex part ASAP, but refuse to first be em… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/01/22 03:38 AM |
| 42 | Treat yourself like a big purchase.Men get huffy about this investment thing, but if anything taught me about the impact of investment re: anything that mingles with their sexual desires (that just plain tap into instincts of aggression and objectification), it’s the stories I read about how they treat sexbots. If she does not “belong” to him and thus he did not invest in her (display model, or even a rental like that failed Vegas bot brothel), the bots are treated terribly. Vs. how I’ve read they treat sexbots when they invested… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/01/22 03:23 AM |
| 79 | West Elm Caleb: Women Warn Each Other about LVM on TikTok, Patriarchy Immediately Freaks OutSounds like this article that says “we shouldn’t make excuses” is making excuses. I don’t really see it as a personal attack either. Caleb is no outlier, he just set himself up as Exhibit A for a toxic culture that many are trying to fight and that STILL our mass media currently waves off and dismisses instead of demanding higher dating standards prior to sexual contact (which leaves men at a disadvantage, who are what the whole thing was designed for)....a dismissal that men consequently will h… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/01/22 11:41 PM |
| 20 | You might've seen the article on men creating AI girlfriends and verbally abusing them. I was curious after that news came out and decided to download Replika (where these incidents occured). This is the program that they were abusing.Doubt they would’ve done it if bot had costed them two months salary. Look how they treat expensive toys they saved up for that are not easily replaced. Men shape up a bit when there is a sunk cost. That’s why I’m like FOH on “50/50”, bc men need to have invested in someone before they’re allowed access to sexuality, to ensure they manage their tendencies for aggression and domination...and do no harm. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/01/22 07:47 PM |
| 55 | You might've seen the article on men creating AI girlfriends and verbally abusing them. I was curious after that news came out and decided to download Replika (where these incidents occured). This is the program that they were abusing.Hire them as sex workers, perhaps? For each other! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/01/22 07:44 PM |
| 15 | A story from a recovering pickme & libfem. Embarrassed to tell my friends what happened to me and do not have family I can talk about this with. Hoping to find support here.Not much advice I can give that hasn’t already been presented, so I am just welcoming you to this community, this ideology, and hope you find validation here. Since you said you’ll be focusing more on friendships and career, be sure to join the sister sub Female Level Up Strategy, which focuses more on these areas. I also dig fourthwavewomen, for more generalized discussion of how misogyny as a cultural factor impacts our lives. Just find the balance between this stuff and living life. Too much … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/01/22 04:38 PM |
| 4 | Basically just discovered a new fetish for myselfI like this a lot. I also enjoy calling out when men attempt to shoehorn sex into a conversation, apropos of nothing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/01/22 06:35 AM |
| 45 | Vetting strategy for the near future- how does he treat his AI?Of course they did. Female vigilance does not serve them, nor does confronting the worse men that frighten them. So just as always, tactical narrative strategy that dismisses the issue is the go to, to conserve their resources and attempt to maintain dominance and control. Same shit different article! I can only hope that not a single detractor’s body is being touched by a woman. How’s that for a “JoOoKe” fellas. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/01/22 09:27 PM |
| 58 | Vetting strategy for the near future- how does he treat his AI?Exactly. When I hear stupid remarks like “it’s just AI, it doesn’t have feelings”, the concern here is not about hurting a bot’s artificial feelings. It’s the idea that you have a user here who, in the face of a realistic portrayal of human hurt (that the user caused!), does not have feelings of discomfort derived from empathy but rather, is experiencing joy. It’s disordered, and would lead me to believe that this person would gleefully partake in whatever abuse, should there not be consequences… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/01/22 08:53 PM |
| 5 | Men Can Now Respond Directly to The Female Dating Strategy Podcast!Obviously they would be Redditors. On a platform that advocates for the free walk n’ talk on several forums (and how that’s supposedly no indication of how little he values those dates), I would be interested in what the stats shake out to be, and hope you will share. If men actually pay this, it’s further confirmation that they do in fact put money towards that which they value....in this case having a voice on the platform, which equates to a fraction more of power. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/01/22 10:32 AM |
| 15 | Casual Sex ConfusionI want to second what the commenter said below about “purity”. Throw it away, that’s an out of date narrative, and no one here cares about the purity narrative designed by men to control women. What we’re talking about is health, and to see the body like valuable financial assets....to be responsible with your resources and not negatively impact yourself with impulse investments that have short term gain that are not worth the greater long term risks. Do smart businessmen ever use the term “fina… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/01/22 10:07 AM |
| 61 | This trended on r / starter packs with a lot of men gaslighting women’s experiences in the comments 🤦♀️Always the reactor they come at as a safe target, never at the root source of the problem that women are reacting TO. Not in a serious way, not even as a joke, no engagement with those men at all. Seems like they don’t feel all that safe when it comes to potentially dangerous men either (barring them actually being those kind of men, and using tactical narrative strategies such as “jokes” to try to get women to doubt their own vigilance). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/01/22 09:34 AM |
| 10 | Be careful of this new generation of “SAHD”, who won’t do any chores, won’t take care of the kids, doesn’t contribute to earning money but will lie and cheatHer hoop-jumping detective work combined with his oafish bobs and weaves are so comically infuriating that it sounds like a warning tale in a children’s book, i.e. Working Mom and The No Good Pop! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/01/22 08:46 AM |
| 11 | Comments are ROASTING him for his age-gap preference - very happily surprised! Based Reddit.As if he desires and appreciates her for something more than ego boosting and sexual services rendered and even sees her as a person. We all want a good bargain on things we don’t value, man, I hear ya, don’t cry about it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/01/22 12:45 AM |
| 203 | Even OTHER men can sense LVM/NVM/ZVM’s red flags with women at the beginning of a relationship, such as “being too busy.”I wish they had just taken it that oooone step further and said the quiet part out loud, i.e. “but we will 100% take advantage of a situation and accept the valuable benefits if you allow us”. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/01/22 12:36 PM |
| 35 | How to tell if you are you building a man or building the relationshipIf you cannot bend, grabbers! They’re like 10 bucks! Men know how to utilize tools, they’ve figured out automated swiping and even use women as tools to simplify life all the time. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/01/22 12:27 PM |
| 87 | Pickme rewards her husband with a blowjob after he's been sexually absent and mainly being intimate IN HIS DREAMS 😔I feel like he’s so disconnected he doesn’t even see her as human. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/01/22 12:24 PM |
| 53 | Pickme rewards her husband with a blowjob after he's been sexually absent and mainly being intimate IN HIS DREAMS 😔I wish more women were open about this and/or simply didn’t do it if they don’t like it. I often feel like I’m the only one- it’s not even a conscious choice on my part, the distaste is involuntary! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/01/22 12:21 PM |
| 60 | Weaponised incompetence is a manipulation tactic. It is not a cute “quirk” that men do and it’s also not funny to actively KNOW that they do this and defend it. Pick me’s are just so delusional.Oh come on. Maybe wrinkles I understand, but he can’t straighten pillows and put a blanket on straight? Yes he can. To purposely not do those things is a passive aggressive sign of hostility. Tell it when the majority of men are like No Problemo and not suspect an ulterior motive when a woman won’t give blowjobs with the reason that she “just can’t figure out” how to not use teeth, just can’t do ‘em, sorry teehee! Please. They’d throw a fit. At least making a bed isn’t something that causes the … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/01/22 12:16 PM |
| 154 | (Possible TW) Can this type of stuff stop being normalized“He’s gripping me by the neck like I’m an untrained dog, how CuUuTe 🤡” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/01/22 12:29 AM |
| 13 | This is all for usBless, that is wonderful. Always keep one eye open as a matter of security, but also allow yourself to enjoy what may very well be positive signs that are genuine. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/01/22 06:48 PM |
| 17 | I can't get over my ex-LVM dating someone 15 years younger than him. Also, thank god for this sub.I don’t blame you for continuing to follow. Everyone said to block and delete my ex on all platforms but I keep occasional tabs on his most active one. Whenever I find myself idealizing the relationship and only remembering the good, I just have to hop over there for a reality check, by reading any one of his simpering, approval seeking posts that reflect values that are fleeting, depending on what social media is telling him what he should be demonstrating concern for on a particular day, and h… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/01/22 06:42 PM |
| 40 | I’m just going to leave this here: “Mick Jagger, 78, is finally settling down with 35-year-old ‘gal pal.’”I like this assessment, how it manages to be both empathetic and gently critical at once. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/01/22 06:31 PM |
| 142 | I’m just going to leave this here: “Mick Jagger, 78, is finally settling down with 35-year-old ‘gal pal.’”lol that is exactly what I am hoping for for her, an arrangement where she just makes social appearances, walks around in the buff sometimes for his appreciative nods, and maybe some (clothed) cuddling. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/01/22 06:23 PM |
| 539 | I’m just going to leave this here: “Mick Jagger, 78, is finally settling down with 35-year-old ‘gal pal.’”“35 year old full time nurse/escort/nanny combo deal” Eh. Let’s hope that after the surrogacy part, the only thing she actually has to do now is just sit back and relax, aside from some light platonic companionship duties and of course developing a relationship with her set-for-life child. Mick can afford to pay for the other stuff. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/01/22 03:50 PM |
| 12 | Ibu-f*ckin-profen - the difference in male and female medical careI can appreciate the content of this post, but I really think more women need to head over to fourthwavewomen, where more general feminist topics that aren’t related to dating are explored. It’s small and could use the love. It feels like users are trying to make FDS (more well known) an all encompassing radfem sub, and it pulls focus from it being dating-centric. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/01/22 08:28 PM |
| 51 | “Ask her out, but you dont need to pay”That’s what men do- they utilize whatever tools are at their disposal to expend as little effort as possible. Effort only matters for that which is human/valuable to them...of which women are not. At least, not in the early stages. It’s more like autobidding on auction sites to acquire a possession. That’s how they see this stuff. I kind of resigned myself to accepting that when they go on the apps, it’s like they’re browsing an auction site, for something they crave but don’t need to live. Unle… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/01/22 09:06 PM |
| 73 | “Ask her out, but you dont need to pay”HOW CAN I GET EXCITED WHEN YOU’RE NOT INVESTED | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/01/22 08:54 PM |
| 58 | Redpill/PUA tactic: breaking the touch barrierWhat I like to do is take his hand very firmly in both of mine, look him directly in the eye, and place his hand in his own lap, or by his side if we are standing. I do it with a smile 😅 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/01/22 05:57 PM |
| 16 | OLD and vettingThere’s a lot of stuff in the handbook. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/01/22 05:51 PM |
| 123 | "I am afraid I will be conned by a psycho man that only reveal his true face after years of marriage"Thanks for saying this. Most guys don’t even have the fortitude to plan and pay for a first date from beginning to end. It’s extremely rare that he would have CIA-level stamina to con a woman for years with no slip ups before dropping the mask...you’d have to be the target of some special gov mission. Why would a man just not take the path of least resistance? There are so many women who only need a month-long con to get hooked. That’s much less work for them. The signs are there over the years,… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/01/22 05:49 PM |
| 6 | Just another day in the mind of a LVM. Men shouldn’t be allowed to date, they’re evolving from walks to wanting to run errands on dates for their own benefitFunny, but we’re talking about creatures who are operating in such a way that they are angling for the best deal possible for their own self-benefit. Unless you were dangling a sex carrot at the end of it (that you had no intention of delivering), he’d just leave. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/01/22 03:40 PM |
| 27 | Just another day in the mind of a LVM. Men shouldn’t be allowed to date, they’re evolving from walks to wanting to run errands on dates for their own benefitI have legit been tempted to suggest it. Who says we can’t chat while we get our pedicures done together? 😂 The second he makes it clear he’s uninterested in taking charge and planning a date, the whole “masculine energy” thing is out the window anyway, so may as well drop the whole “that wouldn’t frame me as manly” thing, it’s too late. and just go to the nail salon together 🤷🏻♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/01/22 03:29 PM |
| 99 | Man who used woman for sex is mad that she used him for sex. There is no such thing as casual sex. They will always want to keep it casual but do not like it when you treat them the same waySomeone tell him NAWALT and that he ChOsE wRoNg | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/01/22 03:05 AM |
| 48 | Am I crazy to think she is way out of their league? And how dare they bring such ugly dudes as options for her? At least she picked the best one.Wow, it was fascinating to see the dynamic, whereby one is analyzed by their individual body parts, turned around on men. A dynamic we’ve always faced (I still struggle to admit this is how we are perceived as it feels dehumanizing). Nonetheless, women handle it with much less nerves (except for the fat guy who seemed to have the most confidence of all of them, even if it was feigned). I don’t know that I like it...I don’t like being reduced to my parts and while I have to be attracted and indiv… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/01/22 02:31 AM |
| 99 | This made me throw up in my mouth just a littleSure is. Third much younger Asian wife in a row. Someone definitely has a...er...”type”. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/01/22 04:37 AM |
| 11 | Oh god…this is so cringy and sad. Why is no one telling this woman to get some therapy? I have no words. This is far worse than just a PickMe.It’s sad but she should not be ashamed. Sex is no problem. It’s care, and touch that doesn’t have to lead to a pp pressing against your body that women are longing for and that few men will offer. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/01/22 11:09 PM |
| 53 | "I'm feeling blamed"Same. His fave lines were “you make me out to be the bad guy” or “Don’t turn it around on me”, when it came to nasty jokes that no one found funny but him. “I’m sorry I sad that” was rarely part of the repertoire, which was really a shot in the foot, because it would’ve gotten him so much further with me, what with me being pretty (perhaps too) forgiving. So, not lines from therapy necessarily, but a general deflection of accountability, which has been pretty common with men I’ve dated and even … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/01/22 02:26 PM |
| 146 | When men imply that sex is eXaCtLy tHe SaMe for men and womenMen hate when you bring up our disproportionate risk, because it reveals the sexual privilege they have and destroys the concept of “samesies” that works in their benefit. Bring it up anyway. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/01/22 02:21 PM |
| 204 | How to piss off men (this had me rolling)“Just be yourself, king” 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/01/22 03:41 AM |
| 22 | Men's reactions to having their lies exposedhope they can get away with it when you’re already too involved Key word being hope . A delusion. Honestly, women worth their salt are just not going to be down with the lie. That’s what makes this an absurd strategy, it’s bound to end. Any woman that sticks around after the truth is revealed, well, she’s kind of got it coming at that point....until she finds us 🤷🏻♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/01/22 04:54 AM |
| 28 | Single's Inferno on Netflix - what we can learn from the hit Korean dating showWow, I love this summary as a mirror of dating realities (esp how men value the women that other men want) and especially this comment. It really is a breakdown for single men I see out in the wild: 20% HV 20% LVM who are attractive and smooth but just looking to chase and play around, aren’t interested in women as people (this is the demo that the next category likes to fixate on as the one they claim “women want” so they have an excuse to be a dirtbag, bc being HV is too hard). bamboozling pic… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/01/22 07:36 PM |
| 57 | OLD gold digger talks money way, way too early, among other red flagsReminder for those of you who find that blocking and deleting on OLD for low/no effort or LV inappropriateness/dehumanization does not “open the door for better matches”, but rather, finds you with 0 men left.... you’re not alone! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/01/22 06:01 PM |
| 258 | Why she doesn't care for him during sex...Um, as clueless as he may be, this woman also sounds LV. You don’t stick around and not go to couple’s therapy. She doesn’t seem to have a mature communication style and they’ve been at this for years. FDS always advocates for prioritizing securing the means to get out if you’re not happy, and you know therapy won’t fix it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/01/22 05:57 PM |
| 6 | "Just live in the moment!"Spot on. It’s truly as if the avoidant are the best self-advocates (as masculine energy tends to be), and unilaterally decided on the hookup dynamic for all, with little protest from the other two groups whose interests are not well-represented in such a dynamic. Any ideas on what we can do for a culture shift? My counter strategy is to reject casual encounters, have high standards, be single indefinitely, and build up other women or the rare man (who tend to be gay) discontent with hookups, to … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/21 05:13 PM |
| 3 | "Just live in the moment!"Oh God. How awful. You see, as a bi without a ton of WLW serious relationship experience, I have an issue with idealizing WLW, that it will all shake out just fine if I stick to that. Granted, sexual risk drops dramatically with WLW. But as far as the emotional, it’s like this social sickness of avoidant detachment is so deeply engrained now, there is no escaping it. And for those not wired for it, they become anxious, with all sorts of bullshit like what you describe in the OP used to paint ove… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/21 04:25 PM |
| 66 | "Just live in the moment!"Somehow I suspect this carefree philosophy of “living in the moment” to “see where things go” only applies to women spending sex, and not men spending emotions, or money on quality dates because hey, you never know where your investment might lead, so just go for it 🙌🏻 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/21 06:25 AM |
| 9 | OLD profiles and effortFully in agreement. The access is too easy for them. Nervousness is what keeps them in line. Moreover, I had all the same standards as OP and yet? It did not filter out 90% of my interested matches. It filtered out 100% of them. All the time. When I relaxed them, I ended up on bad dates. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/12/21 06:05 AM |
| 52 | Look, he'll have breakfast with you if you cook him dinner!He forgot “Invoice Me”. How come when requesting services, they always forget “Invoice Me”? 🤡 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/12/21 01:00 AM |
| 19 | Online dating just to practice or learn FDS?Huh. Worked for me. I was pretty naive and really had no idea that some of these types of men were not only out there, but in abundance. Then I come to find out- after asking IRL men what they thought of this or that male approach- there’s even more men who wouldn’t outwardly employ these approaches, but also don’t see them nearly as problematic as I do. It taught me what is lying beneath the surface in even men who present well...I never knew how careful I had to be in choosing someone to share… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/12/21 12:57 AM |
| 8 | My FDS post gets shared across another sub, and now my inbox is flooded. HELP.Say what you want to, OP. Like others said, these are just frustrated men who self-advocate for what they want so hard, they’d utilize you as a human carpet if you allowed it. And those powerless-in-the-real-world men are still falling back on the old “cat lady” and “gold digger” tropes because they can’t come up with anything original, and are attempting to mask their terror that women will never sexually engage with them again (for free). Underneath the macho man shit is just quivering blobs w… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/12/21 12:58 PM |
| 34 | Paying on dates, are we discouraged to go 50/50 on just the first date or first few dates?I have him pay until it’s clear he puts effort into date planning, is emotionally “in”, and willing to be in a committed relationship. For me that is anywhere from a month to 4 months. Then I’ll trade on dates, as I am at heart a planner and secretly chomping at the bit for someone who demonstrates a desire to be around for for some time, and will be worthy of the special outings I already design for family and close friends (I’ve never met a man who can really match me- a former pro event plann… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/12/21 12:47 PM |
| 26 | Men that push for 50/50 still don’t realize that dating has become a ladies’ market in 2021, with Tinder being 78% male / 22% female and Bumble & Hinge being 65% male / 35% female. Men outnumber women 4-to-1 on Tinder and 3-to-1 on Bumble/Hinge.And that probably doesn’t even account for how many of those female accounts are fake. I have authority to speak on this, as someone who worked in entertainment and faced fierce competition in a saturated market for years. I did not (ahem, usually) tolerate blatant sexual exploitation, and I had standards. And that’s ok! But never did I stamp my little foot and demand that casting agencies come calling and pursue me and make the first move. If they did, I was grateful. Never did I feel entitled … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/12/21 06:45 PM |
| 19 | It’s just me or you also find man cave a bull$hit ?I’m on Team Each Half of the Couple Has a Personal Space. But, I’m also the one who likes the idea of having separate sleeping arrangements as an option, so, take it for what it’s worth. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/12/21 06:29 PM |
| 29 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 42 - 10 Tips for Dating A Prisoner (JK AHAHA DON‘T EVER IN YOUR LIFE)lol the “Don’t waste my time” line 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/12/21 07:42 PM |
| 39 | Let’s bring back shame! Society does not shame men enough!Bit of a difference between simply being attracted to another consenting adult of the same gender, and pretending to be an animal, a being that can’t consent to human sex. And please don’t tell me BuT iT IS tWo HuMaNs because no shit it is. I’m talking about this subby sub crap (kitty is never a jaguar or lioness that will tear out his throat, is she? of course not), that has an extra factor of ick on account of the implication of dominating a subservient animal, who doesn’t even have the cognit… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/12/21 03:57 AM |
| 92 | An article on FDS is trending on Daily StarIt is not body shaming activism. Activism is over arching. Yet they don’t give a shit about penis size feelings when it comes to gay male preferences- and plenty of gay men do have their preferences. In true myopic scrote fashion, only concerned with picking at something if it potentially affects their personal sexual opportunities. So who cares. Men have always been out there self-advocating, strongly. Why are women not allowed to do the same? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/12/21 03:37 AM |
| 73 | These scrotes and their manipulative psychological warfare are becoming obsolete. They are beginning to understand that they are not the prize and women don't care to be involved with NV/LV males just to say "I have a man".Did an FDSer create a fake guy account as a response to all the jokers pretending to be pickme women? 👀 It just seems too good to be true | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/12/21 03:33 AM |
| 17 | When posting here have you gotten Reddit Cares messages from scrotes because they’re big mad?On mobile it was settings, then user name at the top, then “manage blocked accounts”, and typing in RedditCareResources . | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/12/21 01:48 AM |
| 70 | Love seeing men educating other men :)If that resonates, listen to the most recent episode of the podcast on weaponized incompetence. It is so enlightening and validating. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/12/21 04:03 AM |
| 81 | When you follow your intuition but still question yourself / feel bad for enforcing boundariesI feel so seen. I was at my local and one of my neighbors was there who is great sober- he’s actually been good about looking out for me- but a mess when drunk and single. He grabbed my hands, surely with the intent to hold them for an extended period, and I very firmly removed them and put his hands back in his lap. I felt very weird about this. It’s decades of social conditioning that isn’t just eradicated because I have formed new habits, follow through on them, and know intellectually what I… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/12/21 03:57 AM |
| 131 | Stop Oversharing and Be SecretiveThank you so so much for this strategy post. It’s handbook worthy, imo. Historically, it was my biggest challenge. Not because I had a mental disorder where I could not filter, but because I am a natural storyteller and it is how I connect with people. This is ok when others have your best interests at heart, but I have to watch my other blind spot too, the idea that the person across the table is not a master manipulator who is unafraid to use it. It’s a shame for men to not be able to receive … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/12/21 02:49 AM |
| 61 | Lmfao didn’t we learn on an episode of FDS Podcast that this “curve” is actually scar tissue from excessive wanking? They’re reframing it, I’m wheezing.The podcast....is great, but not always are the facts entirely straight. Always research the claims. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/12/21 02:26 AM |
| 57 | The “What Do You Bring to the Table” analogy, astutely dissected… by CayLee Cresta.This seems like a lot of emotional labor. Hopefully who she’s really addressing is women, because it’s not going to resonate with resentful, angry, entitled men. They only respond to clear consequences, such as “I do this, pp no touched”. Not explaining or reasoning but very simple, direct, if-this-then-that cause and effect. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/12/21 09:06 PM |
| 3 | What’s something a man did that gave you “the ick”?I find they hog the weightlifting platforms more than anything. Showing up in groups of 2 or 3 at rush hour, 5 minute breaks between sets, it’s infuriating. You want to do that, come at 5AM or early afternoon when it’s dead, not after work! I hope you’re asking how many sets they have. If they just say “a lot”, persist. “About how long?” A few will be real jerks- it’s always these older lunky types who expect female obsequiousness- and you just have to stand your ground. Getting a spot on lift d… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/12/21 04:37 PM |
| 9 | HORRIFYING OLD Profile; 32(F) STILL has Photos of SAID CHILD VICTIM ON HER PROFILEEh, do we really need posts like this? I think most of us know this is not the way. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/12/21 03:42 AM |
| 15 | Is it me or are the dating apps dead or declining in numbers of men?I honestly feel like an ideal solution would be for them to take their frustrations out on and have sex with each other (I specifically mean scrotes, as I wouldn’t advocate for them to infiltrate the pool of HV gay men either). Let them fight for dominance and kink out and do their Lord of the Flies shit on an island. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/12/21 01:29 AM |
| 16 | Is it me or are the dating apps dead or declining in numbers of men?What I wouldn’t give to be a fly on the wall at Tinder HQ to learn exactly how things are going with the numbers. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/12/21 01:20 AM |
| 54 | What’s something a man did that gave you “the ick”?Leaving shit laying around at the gym for other people to trip over and putting things in the wrong place because apparently reading numbers is hard. Usually weight plates. Usually the college age ones, but some of these men are middle aged. I’ve not seen one woman neglect to put things back in their spot. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/12/21 01:15 AM |
| 4 | Common arguments used to defend the sex/porn industry debunkedQuestion for the group- thoughts on women seeing an STI tested sex worker for convenience and guaranteed pleasure? Any difference of opinion between hiring male or female? I’m not trying to stir any shit up, I genuinely want to know. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/12/21 01:10 AM |
| 24 | Your thoughts on this guy?Attention for an ego boost. You’re “stressed”? “Drained”? Then what’s the point of remaining friends? I didn’t hear a single add value factor here. Let him go. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/12/21 01:02 AM |
| 27 | A message to male lurkers: So what exactly is it about FDS that triggers you?Yes! They can’t divide and conquer here. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/12/21 12:29 AM |
| 59 | How often do you go on a date?In this week’s installment of It’s Not Unique to You, It’s Systemic!......wow these dates sound soooo bad! It’s wild to me that men claim they have sexual “needs”, yet are totally unwilling to plan a dinner, nice drinks and snacks, or activity date. Unless celibacy is at an all time high, I guess there are still enough pick-me’s out there for supply. But I just can’t go back to that life. It sucked. I never felt peace. I think my last date was a year ago. He was not a gentleman in terms of my sa… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/12/21 12:14 AM |
| 110 | How do you handle being approached by scrotes?Great tips so far! I’ll add that behaving and moving in ways which are outside of the Sexy Lady Script have served me well. The movement being that arm-swinging butch walk that you see Kate McKinnon doing in the Verizon commercials, the behavior being whatever Maxine from the Hallmark cards might say, in a cantankerous old bitch tone. Men who don’t see women as people tend to view them in a very narrow way that dovetails with the services they would like to procure (for little to no effort). So,… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/12/21 11:50 PM |
| 157 | Male depravity has no bounds. Remember that the same men you see on a daily basis have these thoughts and fantasies.A man actually said to me that male aggression is good because otherwise the earth would not have been populated in prehistoric times 🤢 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/12/21 12:49 AM |
| 2 | Need advice to level up a guy.I’m going to be the one who acknowledges your lack of options here...I get it (but yes, you really should read the handbook). I’d say, don’t date him, if he’s a nice guy and can handle it then remain strictly platonic friends....don’t “build” and hand hold- if he swings to someone else after you’ve put in time and energy to build him up, you’re going to really resent that. But, ok to point him towards some resources/review a resume/etc. (like you would any friend or family member), see if he tak… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/12/21 12:47 AM |
| 26 | Sex work just is not a good career option as a woman.You have an empathetic view towards sex workers and I appreciate that. I’m more of the opinion that the root sickness is in the industry as well, not those that are exploited by it (even when they choose to be- because after all, some kind of powerful system has to be in place that advances a particular narrative that sustains its power, for an individual to choose to participate in their exploitation). I recognize there is some diciness when it comes to those who are exploited who then turn aro… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/12/21 05:25 AM |
| 52 | How do you handle interactions with men who have already made assumptions about who you are?This comment, OP! I say it quite often- it’s not unique to you, it’s systemic! Men will try to play it off like it is not, that your experience exists in a vacuum, that we’re not talking to each other and sharing our experiences on this dynamic. Don’t buy it. Like commenter said above, manipulating you to believe it’s unique to you is so that they may extract as many resources from you as possible, until you are depleted. Even ok men benefit from this dynamic, as they are then rewarded for basic… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/12/21 05:17 PM |
| 67 | Do you have a friend who reaches out to you when things aren't working out with her man, and then the minute they're okay, she's gone?I have too many stories to tell, and I’ve read so many of them here. This topic comes up consistently. Sorry you’re going through this. For those who want to give the friendship a chance, you really have to state point blank how you’re feeling, and tell her or him that you can’t accept that dynamic. Be prepared to walk if they cannot meet this standard. Otherwise you will continue to serve the role of filler, and that is not valuing or respecting another person. That’s utilizing them like a tool… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/12/21 04:06 PM |
| 17 | Reminder: never chase men, this is what they actually think when you initiateI can only speak to my own experience. In my experience, the dynamic is different, and here’s the key difference: Women may see me as attractive, but they also almost always see me as an entire person, straight out the gate. I can even just tell with how they look at me, the questions they ask of me, which are all encompassing of my human experience. For lack of a better way of putting it, there is this curiosity there. And so women aren’t just settling for easy sex with me, the way that men are… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/12/21 03:03 PM |
| 64 | Came across this in OLD today, respectful women must chase the man, ladies we’re doing it wrong 😂“This male-benefiting narrative-based strategy is brought to you by Me, Man Wanting Maximized Returns While Investing As Little As Possible. Chase n’ Touch pp?” 🥺🙏🏻 Big whoop. Him and thousands more in the sea of sunglasses and scowls and baseball hats and body hair and dead fish and B- biceps on any given app. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/12/21 03:40 AM |
| 45 | Do Pickmes imitate their boyfriends?Girl, from CHILDHOOD. When I was 11, I wouldn’t date this scrotelet (yeah I get to dunk on a child because I was one too), so he went for my best friend. He was a nasty little kid, and made pointed efforts to get in between our friendship specifically because it was so tight (although he did it to a lesser degree with other friendships she had). Little passive aggressive things like when we were talking he’d physically insert himself between us. He’d target me in dodgeball. She’d just laugh. Whe… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/21 04:46 PM |
| 31 | A first year of not downloading Tinder out of boredom and depressionAs hard as it is (and I’m not trying to minimize it!), in your solidarity with the sisterhood, remember this- some poor woman is married to that and has to deal with him on the daily. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/21 04:36 PM |
| 648 | Reminder: never chase men, this is what they actually think when you initiateHow many times do women have to hear “if he wanted to, he would”? That men approach women who catch their eye that they’d consider dating? You approaching leaves you open to someone who will have sex with you, sure, but he was not moved to consider more. It is an ego boost for him. Just because an action benefits men doesn’t mean it will bring you any closer to your own goals. Edit: Thanks for the platinum! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/21 04:31 PM |
| 9 | Our youth are still glorifying breadcrumbing and low effort dating. How will we get them to demand more and understand they deserve more?Hope you got picked, Rose. If you’re even actually a real woman and not a man pretending to be, to advance a narrative that benefits him. Ladies, imagine if we started hiring actors to play HVM on Tik Tok, spreading the good FDS word 😂 I mean, men hire women for porn to promote their interests, do they not? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/21 08:47 PM |
| 25 | Want To Meet Decent Men Online? Write a Bitchy ProfileThis is really informative. We have to remember that OLD is not a public service provided out of the goodness of their hearts. It exists to make money. So if they invest in anyone, it will be paid members and new members who have come in green and hopeful. Dangle the carrot, snatch it away, then hit them with the paid option benefits. Which by the way, didn’t do much for me except allow for very specific lifestyle filters that taught me that the options for someone who really appreciates female … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/21 08:27 PM |
| 82 | Want To Meet Decent Men Online? Write a Bitchy ProfileSO many parallels between OLD and casinos. That’s why I tell women to not make OLD a meaningful investment strategy, it’s just for fun and you should never spend out of your emotional bank account to a point where the spending hurts. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/21 04:48 PM |
| 130 | Want To Meet Decent Men Online? Write a Bitchy ProfileYes! I had the same thing happen! They started out pretty good- attractive with well done profiles- and after that short stack, the app was like “and here’s everyone else!” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/21 04:38 PM |
| 12 | Dear Lord…Look at this dating advice, where someone who is objectively crap who should just leave his girlfriend is still treated with empathy and guided on strategy as to how to maximize his benefits. Where’s VICE magazine on THIS outfit to criticize them on how awful they are for instructing a man on what is most advantageous for him?? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/21 03:37 PM |
| 54 | Is anyone else sick of seeing YouTube recommend these types of videos to you?I mean, let these guys “not simp” and be sexless. All I ask is that they fully well and truly leave us alone. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/21 03:31 PM |
| 180 | Want To Meet Decent Men Online? Write a Bitchy ProfileShe also had a profile that was new. It’s my understanding that when you are brand new on an app, the app knows damn well (somehow) who the more desirable matches are, and puts you in front of them. That’s not to say you might not still have a bad outcome, but I do think this helped her. I believe this is the case for men too, as I’ve heard of them gaming the apps by deleting and resetting up their profiles. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/21 03:17 PM |
| 81 | What theme would you like to see displayed more in movies?I’d like to see more women who are not conventionally attractive featured, thriving....professionally and personally. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/12/21 04:48 AM |
| 9 | It takes men a lifetime to view women as complete human beings.It’s really something how you start to think about actual connection coincidentally around the same time you start to have ED issues. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/12/21 02:14 AM |
| 18 | I don’t have a car and I live with my mom but if you pick me up and cook for me I’ll send you to rehab (respectfully). Found on a Facebook group I’m in and… wow I’m so glad I’m married.I think the translation is, I’m poor, but I am confident to the point of delusion. I like vagina, and food, and TV, gimme it. The only part that escapes me is the green thumb business, maybe some kind of vague aspirations to thrive in the marijuana trade. So, you didn’t miss much if you didn’t read it. Just yet another flash in the blurry Male Desire screen of body hair and baseball hats and shouting and devil emojis and fingers aggressively pointing at penises. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/12/21 01:27 AM |
| 2 | Can you share your thoughts about “Why men love bitches” by Sherry Argov? I personally don’t understand why it gets recommended so much, half the book is about modeling yourself to male expectations.Is reading the Art of Seduction as a woman more offense or defense? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/12/21 01:21 AM |
| 13 | Tired seeing sports on the television at restaurants.I had a local that would have Animal Planet on during brunch. It was delightful. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/12/21 01:11 AM |
| 348 | Break up songs by guys that make you laughCry Me A River used to be a jam for me, until I saw that Britney documentary and got the full story. Now I hear it for the one-sided tripe it is. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/12/21 05:40 AM |
| 30 | Browsing Through Tinder (FDS Art by Me)I agree with this comment. I am most definitely a writer and I think I’m pretty good at it, but l acknowledge the power of poignant artwork (wish I had the talent!). in The 48 Laws of Power, Law 37 speaks of the impact of the visual. An excerpt: “The truth is generally seen, rarely heard. When the Renaissance painter Fra Filippo Lippi was a captured slave among the Moors, he won his freedom by sketching a drawing of his master on a white wall with a piece of charcoal; when the owner saw the draw… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/12/21 01:48 AM |
| 12 | What is the meaning of this?I would find it so emasculating. And also kind of gross to be conflating sexuality with basically treating him like a boy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/12/21 01:34 AM |
| 57 | We all want to feel wanted but there's a huge difference between being CHERISHED and being DESIRED. The first develops and lasts a lifetime, the second burns fast and leaves you empty, even feeling discarded. Doctor Ramani gives us a very important lesson!I love this. Yes, they can coexist. And what is desire when not cherished? Male desire is everywhere. A guy will say, “Have sex with ME!” And another guy will say “No, have sex with ME!” and so on and so on. What really was distinguishes one from another? That’s why I believe in leveling up your criteria to also being cherished. From a practical standpoint, it’s just easier....it cuts the numbers down, as few will invest in cherishing you (all these jeans fit and will cover my body...which pairs… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/12/21 06:17 PM |
| 80 | I have an album saved of the best (re: worst) OLD profiles I’ve come across. I present to you: Men Who Love Telling on ThemselvesThey don’t concern themselves with the intent of the platform. I’ve heard stories of men using LinkedIn to date. Whatever tools are available to them, they will use them for their purposes. Doing what they want in the moment, and figuring out the justification later. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/12/21 12:12 AM |
| 19 | I have an album saved of the best (re: worst) OLD profiles I’ve come across. I present to you: Men Who Love Telling on ThemselvesA lot of these just read as “GIMME” to me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/12/21 12:08 AM |
| 33 | A man you date can only be two things: a dating potential or a husband. In your mind, he should NEVER be considered your family.I’m in the middle on this. I do potentially see a partner as family, but chosen family. They cease to be “family” to me, when I have a good reason to stop choosing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/12/21 10:56 PM |
| 21 | Low effort flirting and low effort dates I have been shutting down all weekThis! Especially around the holidays, where big cities pull out all the stops- holiday markets, pop-ups, tree lightings, tastings, skating, on and on. And for the number one priorities to not be “have fun and foster connection” but rather, “invest as little as possible and hopefully have sex”?? Where is the APPEAL in being viewed as an easily programmable appliance? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/12/21 05:18 PM |
| 30 | When pickmes parrot LVM propagandaSo true! WHAT is it about that correlation of being a good dancer with being good in bed? I’ve found it pretty consistent. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/12/21 05:11 PM |
| 55 | Things you used to find romantic before FDS?Expressing frustration and psychological distress when I could not talk exactly when he wanted to- it had to wait a few hours- because I was visiting with family over the holidays. We’d met only weeks prior. I felt so wanted. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/11/21 09:05 PM |
| 14 | Do you have any female role models?The work of Andrea Dworkin has been tremendously impactful on my growth. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/11/21 03:10 AM |
| 61 | Certain pickmes become "feminists" for a while, just to go back to coddling men and dragging you down with them.I’m not going to be up in here saying JuSt DrOp ThEm, because I understand certain social dynamics/politics can prohibit outright clean snips. We should always have an eye on leveling up but, for the sake of the advantages of social circles and just how long it takes to build brand new friendships (plus, this person may have other qualities like dependability that makes it still overall advantageous to stay connected), sometimes it’s more of a slow “phasing out” process if the bad outweighs the … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/11/21 02:22 AM |
| 179 | Reason 20000000000000007 To Align With FDS, Vet RUTHLESSLY, Enforce Boundaries And Say NO To Casual Sex!They don’t feel guilt because we still- still!- do not have enough members in the Union of Women collectively saying Nah. Other women keep the pickme shit up and in 5 years they’ll find themselves backbending under a limbo bar in hell, having to meet the demand that not only she provide sexual services on date 1, she also is expected to bring a friend (otherwise...Male Disappointment Face....Oh No! 😱) Recruit a member into the Union of Women today! If a possibility is rare, it’s rarely an expect… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/11/21 04:39 AM |
| 40 | I present you the most useless man on planet earth!I’m A vErY bUsY mAn 🤡 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/11/21 02:59 AM |
| 15 | Have Low-Value "Couples" Ever Tried to Degrade You As a Single Woman?Yep. Since they’re going to talk shit about me anyway, some of my favorite not-so-HV-but-fun responses, when I felt like playin’- “Can I just live?” “I’m not into...(vague gesture to him)....that.” Staring and gossiping- “What? ‘cause I farted? Sorry, gas.” “What? Did I bleed through my pants?” To the woman, after I rip a loud burp: “Might’ve gone for you as the better looking one but with that attitude, forget it.” Nothing strips away sex appeal like letting your inner 85-years-young loud talke… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/11/21 02:54 AM |
| 167 | Why do men “not want a relationship” because of a breakup ages ago, but women are still willing to seek real connections and love despite the amount of horror we’ve gone through?We’re socialized to think we need to, and not socialized to drive a hard bargain. They are socialized to try to get a good bargain with the benefits of a relationship, but not the responsibilities. “The hurt from ages ago” is just a mechanism for the goal. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/11/21 02:32 AM |
| 80 | “mAh LeGaCy!!!1!” Writes the wife incubator out of the equation and reduces her to an appliance. No mention of her at all and she’s the one doing all the work! At least the comments are sane. Be so careful who you breed with, the truth trickles out in strange ways so make sure you’re listeningthey can’t don’t want to even grasp there, i fixed it. 😉 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/11/21 02:29 AM |
| 10 | Beware of men who claim they’re a “homebody” and love “staying in”.“a worn out shoe” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/11/21 02:36 PM |
| 112 | Beware of men who claim they’re a “homebody” and love “staying in”.blown their dopamine on bullshit Women here say shit that messes up my workouts bc when I can’t get it out of my head, I’m still laughing so hard I can’t hold the bar steady. No more of this sub in between sets 😅 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/11/21 06:31 AM |
| 85 | Cautionary TaleThis is why I tell women to be ruthless in serving their self-interest, with an eye on a scenario which will be the most advantageous for them. You’re getting involved with a class of people who have absolutely no hesitation- regardless of their appearance, health or station in life- in doing this. So instead of bending our standards, rationalizing warnings, suppressing our goals, and concerning ourselves with narratives they spin for self-benefit, we damn well better match those guys, or we wil… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/11/21 06:15 AM |
| 242 | Which one of you is this aboutI was going to say, this sounds totally fake. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/11/21 10:52 PM |
| 73 | “Play by ear” 🤮I HATE “PLAY BY EAR”!! (sorry for yelling) Yoda would say, “Do, or do not. There is no ‘play by ear’.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/11/21 10:50 PM |
| 103 | “What we not finna do is waste our damn time!” YES 👏🏻Now why aren’t there therapists like this. I don’t care if it’s “unprofessional”. The lessons are quality, straightforward, and she makes it fun. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/11/21 07:42 AM |
| 244 | Scrote’s own 16 yo daughter knows her dad is a creep. Call out the scrote no matter who it isIt’s amazing how triggered and “hurt” this guy is by the interference in his relationships sex supply with vessels he doesn’t see as human. How pathetic. This is a daughter to be proud of, for her wisdom and guidance of the clueless. Imagine prioritizing your pp over your kid’s character development. It smacks of addiction. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/11/21 07:39 AM |
| 3 | Choice feminism - propaganda?Yes exactly what the other commenter said below. A further consideration here is, however, that the messaging for a radfem framework would be coming from women (because our model would benefit them) and not men (who benefitted from the model OP lays out) from whom we historically received messaging from (even when women were used as mouthpieces for the men, as libfems are now). So it would not only be the message itself, but also the concept of who the messenger is in the first place. We have re… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/11/21 04:44 PM |
| 24 | Lets talk about COWARD MenI didn’t actually know this particular pocket was sketch at the time (the neighborhood is fairly gentrified), tbh, until I arrived, but admittedly there is also a certain nonchalance where I live in that great new spots can be in areas you wouldn’t walk around in alone at night, and- even just with a friend, or alone- we still go to these “early gentrifier” spots, albeit in a car. I’ve been doing it for decades. A lot of friends of mine even live in so-so areas, and I’ve visited those friends- e… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/11/21 02:43 AM |
| 79 | Lets talk about COWARD MenI feel so seen! On one date, he suggested a place which was not in a great area. Now, the place itself was adorable (I’m used to these strange arrangements where a gem is dropped into the middle of a bad area) and I liked it but, I didn’t want to be walking around the surrounding area. Initially, this guy said he was going to take an Uber home, and I asked about catching a ride with him and being dropped off on the way, as the drop-off point would be close to my place (I didn’t want to disclose … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/11/21 02:20 AM |
| 205 | Piggybacking off of the not clapping back at men who neg you post. What are some examples of negging that men have done to you?That I had no chance in dating if I did not have sex by date 3. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/11/21 01:54 AM |
| 62 | Choice feminism - propaganda?It’s quite clever. Who has brainstorms as to how this particular bamboozle could be reframed to be used in radical feminists’ favor? My brain is too shot to come up with one but I’ll edit my comment if inspiration strikes. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/11/21 01:41 AM |
| 154 | Men aren’t asking you on coffee dates because they care about your safety or convenience.They are not even dates. I have never successfully built chemistry on these or “walk dates” because they are so low effort and casual, no one is actually invested....but there is an awkwardness, because we feel we need to put in an hour of time as we are calling it a “date” and honestly just assigning way too much weight to what is essentially (for the woman, anyway).... ....vetting sessions. After all, never have I ever been offered just a coffee date by a man who I met in the wild and we had a… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/11/21 08:34 PM |
| 60 | Anyone else become disillusioned with their male friends?I must be an outlier? I’ve had few predatory male friends with spooky stories to match. Like, they’re fine. But I also vet hard with letting people into my life. I ask the pointed questions. I don’t believe I know any sociopaths who are next level good at lying; every man, given the right line of questioning, has 100% told on himself because any kind of sexual thoughts towards me clouds his judgement entirely. The worst I’ve experienced is that they usually do drop you upon achieving Partner Sta… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/11/21 07:43 PM |
| 7 | When a Man Negs You, Find a Way to Turn It Back on HimOh wow. That’s a really interesting take and puts things in perspective. There is a value to not having to suffer through unhealthy homophobic, sexist and racist Christian elitist family dynamics, which has often been the only option I had, outside of going it alone. It takes a tremendous amount of growth to rise above the optics that society values, so your comment is very validating. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/11/21 04:49 PM |
| 26 | When a Man Negs You, Find a Way to Turn It Back on HimWho even decided that the optics of people who spend holidays alone is “sad”? It’s not like most of society gives a flying fuck about how those people are generally faring the other 350+ days of the year. Most people are super VIP about their spots at the table on holidays- it’s not like outsiders are welcome. Which is their right, but then judging those “outsiders” is egregious. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/11/21 04:29 PM |
| 24 | "Do not underestimate the obsession of a bruised ego."Always taking credit for things they didn’t actually do themselves | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/11/21 02:53 PM |
| 75 | "Do not underestimate the obsession of a bruised ego."I’m infuriated by the audacity. Lurking men: Christians don’t need atheists to march in on their sub and give a piece of their mind, and vice versa. Vegans don’t need carnivores to do this on their sub, and vice versa. Proud parent? You don’t need antinatalists coming to a parenting sub to give a right proper scolding....and vice versa. So why the fuck do you think you need to be present on this sub? There are dozens of other subs you can argue with women about dating on. Not all places need to … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/11/21 06:55 AM |
| 67 | Posted in reddit 'Made me smile'. The bar is in hell.Oh GIRL. 😩 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/11/21 04:57 AM |
| 21 | This is the kind of stuff that really scares me😞I feel like in the end you never truly get to know the other person. Tw: s3xual abuse/text postYes girl this is what I mean! True sociopaths who are also sexual predators and can also completely hide it, and never slip up with a single yellow flag, are a very very rare breed, even more rare than HVM. Men with that level of skill may as well be working in the highest levels of organized crime or as government agents- jobs the majority of men just don’t have the fortitude for. I can’t stress myself over something that has the likelihood of being struck by lightning. I feel pretty good about… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/11/21 05:27 PM |
| 46 | Mom said something that really bugged mehaha, imagine mom on the apps saying she’s just there to “have fun”, according to her definition of the term, and what bullshit the suitors would drag in, in response. and when she stated displeasure, instead of respecting her boundaries, she got a solid mantrum of a lecture on how she misled them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/11/21 06:23 AM |
| 36 | Lib fees think they can moralizing against strategyAnd they once could get away with it! Women, constantly pregnant/childrearing/physically less strong but with like, no guns or home alarm systems, had so little power for thousands of years. It’s only getting upended because women earn, technology flattens the world, and men are not needed for survival....and now are being met with this demand that they actually see us as- gasp!- people. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/11/21 06:11 AM |
| 109 | This is the kind of stuff that really scares me😞I feel like in the end you never truly get to know the other person. Tw: s3xual abuse/text postThis is not to undermine the post, but if you are vetting at FDS levels, not standard levels, with your antenna up at the first sign of creepiness, don’t you feel like you would see this coming? Or do you truly think that you could still be bamboozled? I guess anything is possible but like man, my filter is so good barely anyone makes it past the talking stage. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/11/21 05:59 AM |
| 77 | Mom said something that really bugged meThese out of touch moms really need to get on the dating apps themselves and maybe even go out a few times (no cheating, just for life experience!), to get an actual sense of what’s out there. They’re applying metrics of what dating was anywhere from the 70s to the 90s and simply have no concept of how much weight you have to pull in these lazy conversations and lousy dates that make you feel like either a) a potential package of discounted bundled services he’s assessing or 2) you were his 54th… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/11/21 05:52 AM |
| 39 | Have you dated a man that can actually clean up?Yes I dated 3 men that I can think of who were quite clean. In terms of the house, not so much their porn search history :/ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/11/21 05:45 AM |
| 55 | His bride looks mortified. I can't imagine what she felt at that moment.“Kyle walked back with a gleeful expression, confident that he really pwned me today. I took a moment to regain my composure from the shock, cocked my head as if regarding an alien, looked him dead in the eye, raised one finger, and said, ‘Hang on’. Then I turned around, and walked away. The guests gasped- was the offended bride leaving the ceremony? Oh no, just a casual stroll over to the ladies, to commence my own huddle. He was going to get a real good look at that train! The girls gathered a… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/11/21 04:59 AM |
| 1 | What's with all these shows glorifying casual sex as "empowering"?Off the top of my head, I don’t recall one, there may be something in the Wiki. I know you can search by flair, and there is a flair for FDS movies and tv. As far as social media, on Instagram I appreciate Charlie’s Toolbox, and on Tik Tok, @mahamaven, @danisha.carter, and @allieharding. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/11/21 03:08 PM |
| 95 | Start having sex where the man doesn’t orgasmI tried this with my ex and he just stated fine, but in that case, he’d jerk off alone in the bathroom after. Aside from it being a workaround, what’s your take- his motivations, how bad of a response is that, etc.- on that? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/11/21 04:03 AM |
| 40 | What's with all these shows glorifying casual sex as "empowering"?Probably a guy wrote it. Much like the content produced mocking the suffrage movement, I think you’re going to see more of this content that tries to control the messaging, given there is a rising anti-porn movement in Gen Z and they’re having less sex than Y did. Men don’t like that. The solution? Coerce women into casual encounters. Make it cool. Women, they’re malleable! I think it is reactive and that it means we are doing something right. But I hope it doesn’t stop there. I think it’s impor… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/11/21 03:57 AM |
| 95 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 37 - Body Shaming Men For Their Own Good“Adopt a healthy mindset of male audacity and completely externalize your sexual attraction towards men, and don’t be self-conscious about what you like if that’s just what you like.” THANK YOU | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/11/21 06:09 PM |
| 17 | Vetting during OLD/date suggestionsI can appreciate cooking is your passion, and you have the right to talk about it. However, there are 2 types of men, 1) the kinds who see you as a human being, and as such, will ask you more about said passion, your history with it, their own thoughts on the passion, ask you for tips, maybe recommend taking a class together, something like that, and 2) the kinds who see girlfriends not so much as people but as potential packages of bundled services, because it’s cheaper than hiring someone indi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/11/21 04:27 AM |
| 189 | Religion is by men, for menKeeping the misogyny and throwing out the rest is probably because religion still is structured for men to have some level of impulse control, and to commit time and energy on a consistent basis for the benefit of the institution, and scrotes don’t want to deal with that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/11/21 04:10 AM |
| 38 | Religion is by men, for menLadies I’ve been thinking about this so very much today. I’m not anti-organized religion as I believe it can do a lot of good, help people find purpose and community...as has been my experience in liberal churches. But the extremist stuff is a no go for me. I was listening to a podcast today about someone disfellowshipped (I think that’s what it’s called?) from the Jehovah’s Witnesses and I found their modus operandi horrifying. All these power games played to control lifestyles, under the guise… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/11/21 04:05 AM |
| 37 | Y’all do not be hating LVM enough for me.There’s a lot here and I can’t address it all, but I think parts of it are maybe a bit harsh. I understand, but let the mods do their thing as best they can to pull off stuff that doesn’t really fit. It’s not going to be perfect. You can always report posts that seem to run counter. That being said, I am in agreement on OLD, and as to why it’s not- I wouldn’t go so far as “against the rules” but perhaps- discouraged by FDS- or at least cautioned against- as an overarching principle, is beyond me… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/11/21 03:48 AM |
| 52 | Saw this on r/confessions... This is why I don't do FWB“clambering aboard” lol and all I could think of was this 🚢😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/21 05:36 AM |
| 63 | Saw this on r/confessions... This is why I don't do FWBSometimes when I read comments like this I wish I could actually hear them in the user’s voice. I imagine your delivery is priceless. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/21 05:33 AM |
| 70 | Saw this on r/confessions... This is why I don't do FWBWE CARE ABOUT CHARACTER, WORK ON HAVING BETTER CHARACTER YOU DUMB SHIT. Is there a way to extract the unbelievable confidence of this man, condense it into pill form and sell it exclusively to pick-me’s? I’d make a fortune, and also help clean up the world. Ask your doctor about “Audacity” today! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/21 05:30 AM |
| 23 | Spot on, the myth of 50/50 and why it does NOT benefit women“Don’t let them bamboozle you” 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/21 05:18 AM |
| 50 | The Top Places for First Dates in my city as voted on by the populace are... Free public spaces for walking dates.I did it and while I enjoyed the time, it didn’t build chemistry at all and there wasn’t much space for even eye contact much less conversation. Here was a stranger I was just getting to know, but I wasn’t really getting to know him because I was focused on the game as I am competitive, and also admittedly overly focused on not looking like a dumdum when it comes to strategy games. Maybe if it had been a more lighthearted, connection based game specifically built for first dates and ice breakers… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/11/21 07:57 AM |
| 190 | Her Persistence Paid Off: How many red flags can you count in this wedding announcement?No f’in way, her name is literally “Barbara”, I cannot even....Barb, Patron Saint of Builders jokes are just low hanging fruit here 😂 Ok but seriously, for the sake of the sisterhood, now that she’s already in, all I can say is I hope the prenup is in place and that these improvements aren’t just window dressing, and that it actually goes well. Crazier things have happened. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/11/21 03:54 AM |
| 21 | Grown ass 30+ year old men taking highschool/college girls way too seriouslyIn a perhaps overly reductive but nonetheless cut-to-the-heart-of-it take, the answer for me is 2 things: Power, and Delusion. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/11/21 07:56 PM |
| 43 | Examples of green flags in my boyfriend’s fatherThis is lovely. Have you met the grandparents that raised the dad? Are they like this as well? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/11/21 07:54 PM |
| 135 | becoming an older woman is the best in most waysI was thin naturally up until my mid-30s. You don’t really comprehend how much of “interest” is based on the shape of your body, until you no longer have those things. So I spent some time being invisible. Then I lost all the weight, kept it off....and watched the attention come back. No it wasn’t because I behaved “more confidently” (people love to say this to get men off the hook for superficiality), I had just as much self-worth as a person before. I simply came to enjoy running as a hobby, a… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/11/21 07:45 PM |
| 87 | Men and their innate habit of dating youngJust so it’s clear for everyone, I think in your third paragraph you meant for your first word to be “men”? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/11/21 02:38 AM |
| 178 | Husband suggests she stop buying formula rather than get a job and cancel his $80+ a month subscriptions.This would require a hell of a big Lawyer Up. Being unemployed and tempestuous, he absolutely would go for a big alimony settlement, and give hell over custody. Maybe still it would be worth getting him out but man I would not want to be her. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/11/21 02:35 AM |
| 109 | This is why FDS recommends snooping. Be very ruthless with your vetting process! You never know how deprived some men can beAnd WHO the fuck AWARDS this shit | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/11/21 06:10 AM |
| 99 | “Not ready to be serious … but I want to keep seeing you!!” does NOT warrant any responseHe can’t afford to be taking you both out on respectable dates, so he’s choosing her, but is still open to sleeping with you before he commits to the other one. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/11/21 06:08 AM |
| 24 | The Bar is in Hell ExpressionsZING! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/11/21 06:01 AM |
| 243 | “Scrote’s response to: “What sacrifice have you made to save for a down payment?”A woman could never get away with saying that on Reddit, the men would be FURIOUS. So there’s a reminder, ladies, if you want to work towards a level playing field, dare to be as audacious as men. One way to do that is to shamelessly support narratives that advance your interests. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/11/21 02:09 AM |
| 106 | The Bar is in Hell ExpressionsThe bar is so low, it exists on a 2D flat plane. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/11/21 02:05 AM |
| 74 | Ashnikko and her songs: are Gen-Z ladies finally getting fed up?It being hard to make money as a female artist in a male dominated industry- without sexualization- aside....I don’t really have an issue with expressing oneself aesthetically as a sexual being. I actually find it kind of infuriating when I have to tamp it down aesthetically when I go out. It’s tied into my creativity. That being said, if you’re doing this onstage and you’re a pop star with bodyguards et al, you’re pretty safe in doing it. (I definitely have a weakness for shock value in sexuali… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/11/21 11:03 PM |
| 102 | The Dying Art of ConversationWhen he asks not a single question about me. I’d ask “why are we even here”, but I already know it’s generally just an expectation that things will naturally transition to sex if I just sit in the proximity of his magic long enough. Like his presence is a solar charger, I’m the device, and it’s just a matter of waiting side by side until I’m juiced up enough for usage. I don’t know what’s happened to men, I really don’t. They used to at least have the skills to fake it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/11/21 04:26 AM |
| 30 | Help. I just got banned from other subreddits if you participate in this one. My comment was not offensive at all nor was I applying FDS strategies. I call bullshit but I guess I'll make a throwaway.PM sisters you want to help on the big dating and relationship subs. You can’t do so publicly on most of them if you are even just active here, and especially not if applying FDS standards. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/11/21 04:14 AM |
| 20 | JFC. Men: she cares more about material things more than me. Also men: I had to buy a bed frame to get laid.I Am Here For the Girl(s) I Was Promised In Boyhood: Tales of Manospheric Woe | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/21 09:43 PM |
| 49 | JFC. Men: she cares more about material things more than me. Also men: I had to buy a bed frame to get laid.And I don’t even know why they see it as a “weapon”. Stealing, forcibly taking, denying personal agency, these could be weapons. Saying “no” regarding your property is not an offensive attack. It’s a defensive measure- it’s pulling back in response to an attempt that would not be in her best interests, just as a businessman would do should negotiations break down to where the benefits are not worth the liability. The difference is these men find it to be appalling that women would act in kind. B… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/21 09:08 PM |
| 29 | "Good friend" sent me a dick pic "accidentally". He has a great partner too. Let this be a lesson to me for trying to play it cOoL instead of going nuclear at the first message.Oof. Was there any fallout? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/21 07:25 PM |
| 64 | "Good friend" sent me a dick pic "accidentally". He has a great partner too. Let this be a lesson to me for trying to play it cOoL instead of going nuclear at the first message.A little off-topic but has anyone here truly ever accidentally sent a sensitive text? I’ve sent innocuous ones to the wrong person about unconfirmed plans or something when my fingers are flying, I’m distracted and trying to just cross a to-do off my list, but I’ve yet to send anything truly personal accidentally, as I’m often quite focused when doing so. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/21 06:58 PM |
| 450 | John Mulaney’s ex, Anna Marie Tendler, leveling up!!I have to admit I was relieved when I clicked on this and it wasn’t about how she moved on with a better man. Not that there would be anything wrong with that, but it’s also important for women to understand that our success does not merely revolve around romantic and parenthood benchmarks....professional and creative (in this case, both! love to see a woman able to make money doing what she loves!) achievements can define our success just as well. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/21 06:49 PM |
| 42 | JFC. Men: she cares more about material things more than me. Also men: I had to buy a bed frame to get laid.That’s true. See my other comment in the thread about how this often feels like a union vs. management dynamic. As such, if you piss off management, there is that fear of retaliation, if they meet their match in self-advocacy. LVM don’t like that, and you’re correct, may retaliate in order to continue to advocate for what will benefit them. Unfortunately, we have to consider an added layer- safety. That’s why I always say vet first to determine whether this is someone it’s even safe to be alone … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/21 06:38 PM |
| 65 | JFC. Men: she cares more about material things more than me. Also men: I had to buy a bed frame to get laid.It is, and as a union member who deals with the same thing with large, powerful institutions, my belief is that the best way to deal is to find support among the values you share with other members, and celebrate your successes in your dealings with an institution, where empathy is something that is not inherently baked in. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/21 06:28 PM |
| 367 | JFC. Men: she cares more about material things more than me. Also men: I had to buy a bed frame to get laid.What do we always say? Don’t bother with appeals to empathy. If there are no consequences, doing the right thing/for the sake of someone else’s comfort is inconsequential to men like this. You have to exact consequences, as in “well, no sex then”. It is the only language he understands. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/21 04:39 PM |
| 78 | I have to wonder what kind of vibes I'm putting out these daysYou’re welcome. To add, I’m sure you already know this, but as a reminder from someone who used to have a lot of wealthy middle-aged and senior female clients....if you are financially well-off, while it is fine to buy gifts and dates and such as acts of generosity at your leisure, do be wary of financial exploitation. Some men are of the mind that women over 40 are so in need of male attention, it would even be worth being stripped of their assets. When hefty payouts dry up, they’re out. Be vig… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/21 03:23 PM |
| 173 | I have to wonder what kind of vibes I'm putting out these daysI don’t have the emotional bandwidth to address all that’s here but I will say OP that your instincts about power, vulnerability to exploitation, youth, and your self-sufficiency, are correct. You are not going to be able to attract men in the way that young women can, and I do not interpret this as a bad thing. Less attention, highly efficient filter of bullshit. Any connection you have will ride on being seen as who you are as a human (not as merely a package of human services), and a lack of … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/11/21 02:34 PM |
| 94 | I think being intimidating is a good thing.Yes I think it is, but it also prompts me to not just go by how I’m treated, but also watch closely how the man I’m interested in treats people who are not intimidating. The sad fact is that there are people who will not behave respectfully towards others because it’s the right thing to do, only if there are consequences if they don’t. All they know is dominance and hierarchies and shit, not basic human decency. If they take advantage of people who are not as good at defending themselves, I’m no… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/11/21 11:12 PM |
| 9 | LVM hero Dave Portnoy revealed for being an extremely predatory, hateful, psychotic freak who lures teenage girls to his place for violent, humiliating sexI should have italicized “might”, as I intended to strongly emphasize it as a conditional modal verb. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/11/21 03:58 AM |
| 140 | Spotted in another thread. She needs FDS!Never mind that we are often not “choosing” them at all, they’re telling on themselves before a first date even happens- we’re just picking up on patterns in the vetting process that did not exist as prevalently a decade ago. It’s almost as if they’re daring every single woman to exit the pool. But wait, they have a response for that...”not all men are like that!” Well, enough are. The pool may not be the most toxic it possibly could be, but it’s dirty enough to not do much more than occasionall… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/11/21 03:33 AM |
| 36 | LVM hero Dave Portnoy revealed for being an extremely predatory, hateful, psychotic freak who lures teenage girls to his place for violent, humiliating sexIn today’s edition of It’s Not Unique to You, It’s Systemic! we feature a self-important media mogul who is known for treating women (who ChOsE wRoNg) like service stations instead of humans, and wouldn’t you know it, not a handful, not “the exception”, but many many men come out of the woodwork to build up and defend this character, who stirs secret desires to be just as exploitative as he is. But how many men, and which men, in your very own orbit...who may even be right in the room with you, … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/11/21 03:05 AM |
| 33 | LVM hero Dave Portnoy revealed for being an extremely predatory, hateful, psychotic freak who lures teenage girls to his place for violent, humiliating sexCompartmentalization. They’re very good at it and will absolutely distance themselves from another’s humanity if it serves them to do so. The exception might be if it was their own daughter- then tribalism and ownership mentality kicks in. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/11/21 02:47 AM |
| 28 | "Cool girls" in movies and shows.Right? Let’s deride people doing what they have to do to make it, and totally ignore who created the framework- and who put the stereotypes on paper to be acted out in order to support that framework- in the first place. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/11/21 02:44 AM |
| 472 | Spotted in another thread. She needs FDS!In today’s edition of It’s Not Unique to You, It’s Systemic!, we hear from a chivalrous young woman who courts her dates like the dear princes they are, while also managing to boost their masculinity (although no masculine traits are demonstrated, aside from aggressively pursuing sex). How long before a male Redditor- also on the hunt for a discount package of bundled services- asks “WhO aRe ThEsE GUYS yOuR’e TaLkInG tO?”, attempting to isolate her experience instead of acknowledging the dynamic… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/11/21 02:06 AM |
| 34 | are guys allowed to roster date?Agreed on this. You can’t really know anything about a person after one date, except to confirm they are not a total “no way” at first meeting, that they show an interest in you as a human, and whether you’d like to learn more. If he’s putting all his eggs in one basket after a single meeting, I’d be more concerned that he’s looking to just find somebody, anybody, to be with. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/11/21 01:57 AM |
| 8 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 35 - The Queens Are Off to Baggage Reclaim with Natalie Lue!Thanks for defending the 3 month rule. It’s no guarantee for forever- a man can bump his head/face a tragedy/whatever and become a different person down the line- but I think it greatly increases your chances of something that is quality, whether it lasts “forever” or not. It’s pretty fair to assume that most men who are not gentlemen/are only in it for sex cannot fake it for longer than a couple months, and so it does help. ETA: omg yes! If you have a blog, a podcast, you do standup, or whateve… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/11/21 03:51 PM |
| 25 | “Men aren’t loved unconditionally, women are”How do scrotes not compute that having the humility and good sense to sincerely hold these beliefs AND having the balls to state them publicly is wildly attractive and can make up for a lot of physical shortcomings. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/11/21 10:30 PM |
| 82 | They are trying to keep men hooked. Calling them an extremist if they don't use it. Real men don't need pornOk but why did this have to be framed as a left/right issue. Oh right. The American Conservative, so of course. Because in reality, the most outspoken against porn (as in they are actually trying to do something about the industry, rather than just rail against it and say “don’t do it”) are the radical feminists, whose politics fall on the left. And far right “anything goes” libertarians totally support porn. Well, at least the article referenced the objectification of women and didn’t make a ca… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/11/21 03:44 AM |
| 5 | Motives and Manifestations of Sex as Self-Injury(SASI)This is fascinating. Thank you for posting this study. I’m surprised there are so few comments, as the future of FDS and other philosophies that benefit women pretty much hinge on societal shifts in female self-advocacy. This is the kind of research that takes a closer look at how girls are faring in that regard. I note a few things- how it is more girls than boys. Feminine energy strongly correlates with girls, and feminine energy strongly correlates with turning anger inwards when experiencing… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/11/21 11:11 AM |
| 11 | Role of a therapistIs there a secret network that therapists versed in FDS belong to? 👁 👄 👁 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/10/21 04:03 AM |
| 254 | This is what men think of women they hook up with. It is not in our best interests as women to sleep with men casually.“Ignorance is bliss”? Hell no, pull back the curtain and let them tell on themselves. Men count on ignorance to keep this shit up. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/10/21 12:09 AM |
| 5 | If they won't listen to us, they should listen to this guy.I had just asked some other disciples about men radically changing after 35, and the consensus was that essentially it would be spurned by some major, totally life-altering event. So at 43 I am wondering what the thing is that happened to this guy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/10/21 01:47 AM |
| 101 | Has anyone heard the new song “Fancy Like” by Walker Hayes? I would have thought the lyrics were cute before joining FDS..Some female artist really needs to write the answer song to this mess, that mentions such things as “investing in what he values with thoughtful dates”, “avoids porn”, “remembers important dates”, and “effort”. That would really have the Cheetos spilling all over keyboards across the land. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/10/21 01:33 AM |
| 14 | Any tips on how to engage a man emotionally without sex being on the table?I am so glad I am not alone in this! Yes, it’s always SeX iS iMpOrTaNt To MeEe, but the equal representation I seek on emotional connection is never respected. And I’m not even insisting on it ASAP, the way they are with what they want. It astounds me how men say dating is harder for them, when it’s still their priorities that set the tone and that women are expected to go along with. Maybe getting to dating is harder for them, but it should be. Allowing access to our bodies is a risk, and they … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/10/21 12:43 AM |
| 18 | Any tips on how to engage a man emotionally without sex being on the table?My rollerdance class is bomb, and I’ve met some nice women, but, zero guys. Next up for me, a French cooking class! I agree with you in back-burnering apps because it’s a lot of time that can get wasted, sifting through thousands of unqualified men (I wish the apps had AI we could pay to do it for us and notify us of qualifiers!). I keep my high level filters up- both app filters and questions that address my bottom line (no porn, and emotional connection before sex- not the other way around) an… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/10/21 08:16 PM |
| 144 | Your reminder that polyamory is a complete scam for women. This woman is trying to convince herself that she’s okay with hearing her husband have sex with another woman.oh probably his phone, during meal times, to text and receive pictures from other women. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/10/21 06:55 PM |
| 69 | Your reminder that polyamory is a complete scam for women. This woman is trying to convince herself that she’s okay with hearing her husband have sex with another woman.“a base instinct grabs hold of my gut” “oh i’ll just ignore that 🤡” The one bright spot is there are actually a few top comments that point out what a mess this is. Don’t bother reading the one that kicks off with I aCtUaLlY dOnT sEe ThIs As SaD! that shows zero empathy for her situation. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/10/21 06:53 PM |
| 35 | Any tips on how to engage a man emotionally without sex being on the table?I think the advice is covered here, so this is more for lurkers that might be able to relate, not OP, who has a very reasonable request. I wish it was a dating norm (outside of religious circles). I’m really not trying to be negative, but I just always find myself floored that women meet men who are even open to this “emotional before physical intimacy” concept. My vetting is on point prior to even going out on a date, but what I find is basically being permanently stuck in the talking stages. N… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/10/21 06:35 PM |
| 41 | Podcast discussion - expanding your social circleI pursue friendships in the same manner as the hosts- volunteering, mutual interests, repeat events, etc. However, the idea that you need a man is still so baked into our social fabric, I find myself running up against it still repeatedly. I meet wonderful women who may even agree with the FDSisms I casually drop but who still center their lives around a man- getting one, keeping one, ditching friends for one. As soon as they land one, it’s like I don’t exist. Or he has to tag along to everythin… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/10/21 06:15 PM |
| 14 | A weird form of negging, but I can’t quite put a finger on what I should call itI know the philosophy, I’ve been around a while. I have it on cut and paste, so it’s not emotional labor, and it teaches him nothing other than saying the quiet part of “block and delete” out loud- I’m here to benefit myself. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/21 10:37 PM |
| 91 | A weird form of negging, but I can’t quite put a finger on what I should call itOne thing I’ve learned about how men date is that they act in ways which they believe will benefit themselves. They are not worried about looking stupid, or creepy, or sex obsessed, or manipulative or too demanding. It’s literally just “These are the benefits I want, so I’ll see if it works for her”. Recently I’ve been doing the same, and it feels so foreign. But, can’t win if I don’t match them. So my closer would probably have been “I know you are speaking in a way that has your benefits in mi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/21 08:31 PM |
| 86 |
| /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/21 04:27 AM |
| 8 | “But I love casual sex. I have a high sex drive and I don’t want a loving relationship.”What I can say to men faking it is yes, vetting will always be important. Because I suspect that access to female bodies will drop/is dropping out of circulation, and not necessarily for “the greater good”/a coordinated action, but because honest conversations are being had now about the risks and quality of the sex, which a lot of women found disappointing but wouldn’t admit to themselves as they wanted the validation so bad. But we are also teaching women that validation from people who don’t … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/21 03:28 AM |
| 6 | “But I love casual sex. I have a high sex drive and I don’t want a loving relationship.”I’d love to know if these friends would blissfully cross a picket line if they were in a union (that is responsible for what rights they do enjoy), happy to make negotiations for improved working conditions that much harder. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/21 03:11 AM |
| 131 | Men who only pursue you romantically after your “glow up”Oh My God yes, it drives me NUTS when people say Oh it’s probably you are just MoRe CoNfIdEnT 🤪 No, people are just shallow. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/21 02:53 AM |
| 8 | Pornsick scrote can't be asked a normal question without turning it sexual...this was our first conversation 😒 Have I discovered a new vetting question??wtf does this even mean, such shoehorning of sex i never have seen. with all the whining about how they GeT nOoO mAtChEs 😭 it astounds me that once they actually get one, they still manage to fuck it up and talk their way out of actual sexual opportunity, again and again | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/21 02:45 AM |
| 41 | You rarely hear of the overly cautious woman who was murdered by a scrote.And yet men don’t seem bothered by the overprotective daddy trope, do they. In fact, they find it badass. I guess being cautious and suspicious is only cool when another man is protecting his “property”. But a woman with that vibe is offensive because reasons. Unfortunately, most of us don’t have a Daddy On The Front Porch Cleaning His Shotgun service available to us, so we have to be our own. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/21 02:37 AM |
| 77 | men's responses to your job/career situation is a quick, easy way to vetGood god, reading these comments makes me feel grateful that my job is nearly impossible to sexualize and there is no way for a man to translate it into benefits for himself. Oh wait, maybe this is why they aren’t interested in me because it’s all too, you know, human and doesn’t neatly fit into the Service Package 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/21 02:32 AM |
| 23 | Pickmes and 🤡🤡🤡: “If you are so picky, you are going to be single forever.”Ok so who’s going as A Crazy Cat Lady for Halloween chanting “FDS, FDS” under their breath and cackling “I am the FUTURRRE” wherever the low value congregate, to terrorize them. Instead of wielding an axe it’s a high end vibrator, and money. Bonus if you have a copy of your PhD diploma pinned to your chest. 👻 😱 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/10/21 01:36 AM |
| 24 | Are men not attracted to women they respect?Some men are attracted to who they respect. Those are the ones you should focus on. Don’t stress over the rest. Their shallow attraction is the problem of whoever is willing to entertain them. You don’t want it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/10/21 01:28 AM |
| 5 | Man cheats on wife online with a model who turns out to be a romance scammer. Says he married his wife “out of convenience” & doesn’t want to make the marriage workI really hope she did. The vague “moving on with her life” didn’t explicitly clarify “without Steve”, which made me uneasy. I hope she emotionally disengages from this man who does not love her- she is sweet, patient, and lovable and deserves an appreciative man. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/10/21 01:41 PM |
| 11 | reminder. none of us like this. but...(if you are serious about wanting a relationship with a quality man) you HAVE to meet a lot of men 🤢. finding hvm involves luck. if you go on as many dates as possible 😢you will increase your bleak, terrible odds.I’m not close to 200 yet, wow, what tenacity! I don’t suppose there is a way to know a man’s join date on an app? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/10/21 11:11 PM |
| 22 | PSA: For the love of God, STOP faking your orgasms ladies!Like in horror movies where the victim is being chased by the killer, and runs to a neighboring house, frantically hitting the doorbell like DING DONG DING DONG DING DONG 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/10/21 10:36 PM |
| 125 | Man cheats on wife online with a model who turns out to be a romance scammer. Says he married his wife “out of convenience” & doesn’t want to make the marriage workYou know what I hate to say? I hope I don’t get downvoted for this. I’m not mad about those boy scammers. On the podcast today, there was a quote something along the lines of “I’m not a home wrecker. The home is wrecked. I’m pulling her from the rubble” (re: warning your friend about her bad relationship). It’s terribly painful and embarrassing, but Tammy was so deep in delusion that it literally had to come to this for her to see that man for the lying, bumbling joke that he is. And that he fal… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/10/21 10:30 PM |
| 61 | reminder. none of us like this. but...(if you are serious about wanting a relationship with a quality man) you HAVE to meet a lot of men 🤢. finding hvm involves luck. if you go on as many dates as possible 😢you will increase your bleak, terrible odds.I’d be interested in more reports like this. Maybe we could have a monthly pinned post with user stats! I’m down to make one now just to see exactly how the percentages shake out. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/10/21 09:02 PM |
| 122 | Everyone please be aware! They're not only spiking drinks but now they're using needles to spike women! It seems to be happening very frequently in the UK so stay safe if you're from there.Just wondering- instead of telling women what they need to be doing, whining about GeTtInG nOoOoO sEx 🤬 and “Not All Men”, if men will ever start calling out worse men who are the root cause of women avoiding places where men congregate, ruining things for everyone. I’ll wait. And wait. Aaaaaand wait. ETA PSA: while we’re waiting for however many years for men to actually call out other men, in the meantime please don’t leave your girlfriends alone at a crowded club, even if she seems content wi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/10/21 08:38 PM |
| 25 | Efficient!JFC, at a certain point you’d think they’d get tired of that and would just level up however they gotta level up, if they “need” it so much. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/10/21 02:11 AM |
| 48 | These NVM ain’t even trying to cover up what they really think anymore… it’s truly sad that their are women that will actually choose to match with these sick men.“going to the gym makes the pain go away” Because therapy or a support group isn’t macho. Then they scream about male suicides to us and how men’s mental health isn’t supported, when they can’t even support their own. I guess we’re supposed to endorse unhealthy aggressive outbursts directed at other people, stress eating, addiction, or some other endorphin chaser that actually does nothing to solve an emotional problem/process a trauma- or we’re the enemy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/10/21 01:48 AM |
| 522 | Repost from another sub - this just shows how not having high standards is self defeating & we must strive for relationships that benefit usThis is what always scared me about being an incubator for having kids with a man. I would really like to see more women wake up to this, and be in solidarity with each other, like a union. That’s the only way to collectively raise standards. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/10/21 03:25 PM |
| 50 | The good old “what’s your type” questionThere is an excellent thread from yesterday about the service-based perspective you refer to, I believe it was called “this is why you don’t tell men you enjoy cooking”. I think you’d find the comments interesting- not sure if I’m allowed to link to other posts in the comments so DM me if you can’t find it and want to check it out. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/10/21 12:33 AM |
| 3 | Would you give your phone number to a guy before meeting for the first time?It depends. Unless it’s really clicking, I liked to video or audio call before meeting a stranger. If the app doesn’t have that feature (like OKC), I gave out my burner number. Never the real one. Never had a problem transitioning to the real number. If we made it that far, he understood. This is all past tense, fwiw, since I’m pretty much off apps. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/10/21 11:57 PM |
| 21 | Shout out to everyone who told me to lower my standards, that no one would ever meet themI love to hear positive stories like this. I feel relief to know that HVM still exist. I hope he can exert this influence on other men still leveling up. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/10/21 11:45 PM |
| 85 | "Dating for women is like shopping, dating for men is like a job interview"“Women need to act in accordance with what benefits me.” Why? To what end? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/10/21 11:40 PM |
| 8 | Followup to yesterday's question: When do you first remember being told that a boy is mean to you when he likes you?As soon as boys and girls were put together in a less than tightly supervised situation (like preschool) so, kindergarten. Playground incident I believe. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/10/21 11:38 PM |
| 331 | I went to a party and was never more relieved to go home alone. 🤣It’s the “disordered characters” and “the root of all fuckery“ for me! Stealing. This is why I like to meet men in the wild, and party settings are ideal. There are bound to be pick-me’s there. It’s important to take note of how he treats me, but I also like to see how the men interact with those women. Are they merely polite to the women yet reserved, sensing the desperation? Or do they take advantage of the situation? Do they try to get them drunk? Do they get immediately handsy? Do they take … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/10/21 11:14 PM |
| 3 | This is why you don’t tell men you enjoy cooking 🤦♀️Knowing that men often are thinking about services, to be clear, I do now quietly assess whether he will bring value. But I am tactful about it, rather than making blatant requests to be served....which they will do without hesitation, even before the two have met, as the OP showed. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/10/21 05:35 PM |
| 4 | This is why you don’t tell men you enjoy cooking 🤦♀️It’s very hard for him to not start telling you how he wants to use your talents Yes, this! And they do it right away, blatantly, if a door opens. It does not work for me. After we’ve connected emotionally, if I happen to know he’s handy, might I ask for help with a busted drawer, and offer lunch in return? Sure. But it feels icky to be jumping straight to that on a first date (when I would prefer to simply connect as people)- imagine if he happened to know a fave celebrity, and I suddenly made … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/10/21 05:33 PM |
| 5 | Pre-nupsDamn you are a kickass negotiator. I love this story and the dichotomy of your current appreciation for him vs. the understanding that vetting doesn’t end/your independence is critical if you ever need to leave. If there was an FDS Women’s Hall of Fame, you’d belong! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/10/21 11:33 PM |
| 12 | Always use a sperm bank - no matter what...On behalf of the sisterhood, I’m very disappointed in you, Jessica Ornsby. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/10/21 11:17 PM |
| 420 | This is why you don’t tell men you enjoy cooking 🤦♀️This happened to me when I discussed my past creative pursuits, none of which were of interest, except the burlesque. Not because of the craft, but because SeEeExXx and his brain went like 🚨 🚨 🤪 I suddenly became interesting. And by “I” I don’t mean me the person, I mean the services I could potentially represent. It’s sex, or it’s food, or cleaning, or childcare, or whatever other services a woman might provide. I have since purposefully avoided discussing my usefulness in those areas and only … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/10/21 11:07 PM |
| 62 | Grown man with a family asks “what am I left with?” if he can’t move across the country for a jobI think a lot of men at heart define themselves through their jobs and the money they make. The family is considered ancillary- a resource they were promised in childhood and thus believe they are entitled to, that supports his vocation by offering comfort (sex), domestic labor, social planning, social validation (I have the wife and kids! I Did The Thing!). The family is not seen as humans who have identities of their own, who require emotional nurturing of their own. Women should not procreate… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/10/21 10:26 PM |
| 7 | Bachelor in Paradise CouplesDid anything in particular happen for it to suddenly hit you? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/10/21 07:03 PM |
| 71 | Bachelor in Paradise CouplesWhat I always wonder is how these men never feel self-conscious over their bodies which just don’t come off the same way as a 20-something man’s does. Things creak, and sag, and get wrinkled, and that’s understood by women their age, but it’s wild to me that such young women, too young to relate to these things in their own bodies, just like, are fine with it. A thing I also notice more so in both older people- but more so men- is a rigidity in terms of ways of thinking and personal routines. Ho… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/10/21 04:40 PM |
| 98 | University of Delaware is still trying to cover this up.I would love to see them do it, just to see how it shakes out in a semi-controlled, bubble environment like a campus. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/10/21 03:01 AM |
| 35 | Why men defend predatorsDamn, on point. When clear offenders face consequences, it means more potential accountability for the rest down the road, which means a loss of power. No wonder I see men pussy footing around to condemn what is clearly reprehensible. When it comes down to brass tacks, their number one thing is power. Money is power, and sex is power, elevated social status is power, and the power means much more to them than ethics. It’s almost as if there has to be some kind of credible threat (like a war, or … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/10/21 02:57 AM |
| 6 | Mod appreciation postAs long as, like you say, critical discussion of mod and host action is allowed. I’ve often seen that taken poorly by the subject in question, and yet the advancement of this movement (while imperfect, the best I’ve seen so far in terms of advancing the interests of women as they date in a culture rife with porn and other influences that prey upon men with the illusion of choice, and actively work against women) hinges on our freedom to think critically and speak up when a top dog (subject to hu… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/10/21 08:32 PM |
| 16 | having and defining your own standards is a great first step, but keep going!!! don't stop there.Excellent post. I too have been examining what my height preference is about. I realized that it is about feeling protected. So yes I’m going to prefer taller than me and not skinny because the optics help when it comes to other men (who absolutely judge both men and women on appearance), but if you’re 6’4” but still shrink away when I’m threatened, I’m out. If you’re 5’4” but make for damn sure no one fucks with me (I think of My Cousin Vinny lol), I’ll give it a chance as long as you’re not ar… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/10/21 07:34 PM |
| 1 | The Bored Sex - Women, more than men, tend to feel stultified by long-term exclusivity—despite having been taught that they were designed for it. - My reply to Infovore777Wow, this is so well put and resonates big time, and is the same I’ve heard from hundreds of women (because we all actually do talk to each other about shared experiences!). | /r/MensRights | 08/10/21 03:00 PM |
| 51 | Found one in the wild!Advocate for my mental health by not making me feel like Option Z on your list worthy of no more than “walk date”, thx so much | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/10/21 03:45 AM |
| 172 | Poor PickMe did a dang photoshoot 🤦♀️What is the point of this? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/10/21 12:48 AM |
| 48 | FDS is featured on JezebelWhat we do, to many men- and the obsequious women who lower their standards and thus envy that we won’t- that is a scary story. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/10/21 12:26 AM |
| 88 | Why they neg, straight from the horse’s mouth.That’s a lot of words for “me wantz pwr 🥺🙏🏻” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/10/21 12:22 AM |
| 6 | Women who like women, approach them in a totally different way than men. Plus they are sexy in a different wayOooh man, I didn’t know you could lose your real ones from doing false ones too much, to where you have to have them 24/7! Thanks for the tip, I will save it for special occasions! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/10/21 09:57 PM |
| 778 | Women who like women, approach them in a totally different way than men. Plus they are sexy in a different wayinterested in finding out about me The bar is so low that this line has me weak in the knees. They...they actually saw you...as human? 🥺 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/10/21 11:57 PM |
| 84 | Women who like women, approach them in a totally different way than men. Plus they are sexy in a different wayAnd now I see fake lashes at the gym. I’m not judging, but with all the sweat and stuff I truly do not understand. And yes, I do think this stuff is porn culture proliferating dating culture. I can’t imagine women would do these things if you removed that factor. Cute outfits and braiding, stuff that makes sense for a workout, yes. But not flat out impracticalities. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/10/21 11:55 PM |
| 92 | If you are confused about his intentions, read this. These are the words of men, describing how they behave when they love and respect their woman. Don't accept any excuses, ever!This is exactly what I’m seeing. They run in very close-knit, tight HV circles whereby you either have to know them from way back or work closely with them over a stretch of time to gain their trust (they don’t want their peace disrupted either) and hope you stand out from the other HVW....or, more commonly, yes, friendless introverts who desperately want to be loved (which is the only commitment oriented sort that I’ve seen on OLD). I just keep leveling up my life, and place faith in the univer… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/10/21 10:09 PM |
| 18 | I’d show you the comment I was responding to, but he deleted it. Called out a misogynist and he wrote an essay in response.“I punch a wall or a face and get over it and the wall or the face should get over it too.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/10/21 06:49 PM |
| 330 | If you are confused about his intentions, read this. These are the words of men, describing how they behave when they love and respect their woman. Don't accept any excuses, ever!But my question is...do any more than a small minority of men even want to feel like that? Blame it on illusion of choice (porn or swipe apps) or the marginalization of people via largely unchecked capitalism that has men scrambling for any scraps of power they can get....but men I meet don’t seem to be interested in this level of vulnerability. It means relinquishing power and control. The companionship and helpmate and breeding aspects of it sure, but not this level of surrender. Are you ladie… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/10/21 06:39 PM |
| 16 | Scrote is a disrespectful jerk on OLD. Gets praised and awarded for lowering the bar by other scrotesSensitive, emotional children can dish out tacky jokes but can’t take them. “How much do you make in a week? I need to know so I can fill up my Amazon cart with goodies that come to that same amount! AHAHAHAHA WHAT? It’s JuSt A jOkE” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/10/21 01:07 AM |
| 17 | How high expectations are saving South Korean women from unhappinessThis popularity I know about. But I guess what I’m really asking is, can you literally not succeed financially as a woman there if you consciously reject this norm? Is there no chance unless you’re born into money? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/09/21 01:20 AM |
| 22 | How high expectations are saving South Korean women from unhappinessIs maybe saying “housing prices” a dumb fox clever dodge? Because if you say “men are inadequate”, I feel like most men will just become resentful, stubbornly dig in their heels, and refuse to be better, because they are being directly challenged. But if you deflect and say it’s something else, it makes me wonder if perhaps they will naturally be moved to be more enticing to sweeten the deal, in order to outweigh the other roadblocks presented. Even if they don’t improve, it seems like blaming i… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/09/21 01:09 AM |
| 23 | How high expectations are saving South Korean women from unhappinessAre you saying that you cannot do alright for yourself in the working world there as a woman, if you are not beautiful, even if you are talented at the job? How do the less aesthetically fortunate get around that? Are all women in Korea pretty much forced to spend oodles on beauty products to succeed professionally, and is there a certain age or professional status where you can finally afford to drop it? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/09/21 01:01 AM |
| 3 | Anyone else having trouble making new friends after FDS?Anywhere from political organizations, to volunteer work, to hobbyists...there always seems to be these 1 or 2 aggressive alphas who first make themselves “indispensable” (in reality anyone could handle their responsibilities, but no one wants to), and then proceed to establish hierarchies, with themselves at the top with a chosen inner circle. It ranges anywhere from subtle exclusion and cliquey stuff, to outright rude behavior. And I did enough of that in high school (and have to deal with it … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/09/21 01:10 AM |
| 16 | Open communication doesn't seem to be a thing anymoreI love to hear it! If there is hope for rural women to meet dates IRL and organically, that’s a great thing. It’s just that whenever this topic comes up, without fail, someone says “But there is hardly anyone in my area, I need this to meet people!” Not dating in a rural area myself in this day and age, I wouldn’t know, so I try to be sensitive to that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/09/21 11:16 PM |
| 11 | I'm noticing something scrotes do to undermine when a woman makes a definitive statementI meant, what should he (or anyone else) have responded to you, in the event of a fundamental disagreement on a point? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/09/21 10:10 PM |
| 9 | Anyone else having trouble making new friends after FDS?I’ve found it difficult to fit into a group- group after group after group that I have tried the past 2 years, maybe it is the pandemic but it seems there has been a shift towards utilitarianism/usefulness. If you’re especially useful- meaning you’ll really commit to the utilitarian purpose of the group (which generally is some sort of hobby), you can get away with being a real asshole to other group members. I don’t like that barometer. If you’re a busy person who doesn’t have time to do a lot … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/09/21 10:04 PM |
| 13 | I'm noticing something scrotes do to undermine when a woman makes a definitive statementWhat would be an appropriate response if you are disagreed with? I ask not as a challenge but for my own point of reference. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/09/21 09:50 PM |
| 79 | Open communication doesn't seem to be a thing anymoreYes, I do sense a shift towards convenience and utilitarianism that erases the person she is, much like purchasing a product designed to provide a service (except they want it as a free giveaway). Lot of theories on why- technology providing instant grat in a lot of other arenas, too much porn, etc.- but the way OLD is designed in terms of the illusion of choice (we know the apps are fleshed out with fake profiles to keep men engaged), the efficiency of the swipe, the dehumanization , the low in… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/09/21 09:41 PM |
| 393 | No context even neededJust stick with the guys, dude. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/09/21 09:25 PM |
| 78 | Women going to college is creating violence in men! There isn’t quality in Uni so men aren’t going! We have a mating crisis!!I do wonder if this trend will continue. What I’m not clear on is if overall most women are going in general. I am astounded by how much, even accounting for inflation, college admissions have risen since I went. Aside from deals like free tuition to state schools like you have in NY, it wouldn’t surprise me if more women went into the trades as well- perhaps launching their own businesses- and thriving there. In which case, not going to college will no longer be an excuse to be broke and lonely… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/09/21 11:07 PM |
| 5 | What are our thoughts on this culture of rushing into marriageI do find them to be a beautiful couple. But on her social there does seem to be this childish element of them playing house. For their sake, I hope they mature together to grow out of this ( before bringing children into it), or they will break apart...and going back into the dating pool- especially as a single parent- isn’t exactly a picnic (albeit it’s better than being trapped in a dead marriage). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/09/21 03:16 PM |
| 22 | “Men always complain about being friend zoned, but do they know how much it hurts to be fuck zoned? As if our friendship only had value to him because of possible sex?”It’s not a need, it’s a craving. Men push themselves to get the things they truly need to live. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/09/21 03:02 PM |
| 33 | “Men always complain about being friend zoned, but do they know how much it hurts to be fuck zoned? As if our friendship only had value to him because of possible sex?”Why don’t they hook up with bigger, stronger men that they don’t know then? It wouldn’t be that hard. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/09/21 02:59 PM |
| 40 | I finally had to leave one of my favorite online communities because of the misogynyIt’s the for-women-by-women subs for me because is this. And subs for dorky, benign interests that are hard to make about bodies and/or tend to attract intellectual types, like the jazz subreddit. Granted you’ll still get male know-it-all’s fighting each other but at least it doesn’t rope in any kind of identity wars. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/09/21 03:51 AM |
| 30 | One of the MANY things I’ll never do for a man: compete for him. You think you found better, then go!!!!!! Please!!! Get as far from me as you can!!!!! Feel so bad for this woman…I feel bad for her. I wonder if she’s a religious conservative. In that culture, you are expected to preserve the marriage at all costs. I know people who have done it- terrible mistake. Put them through far more pain than necessary. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/09/21 03:45 AM |
| 41 | Can we talk about men who act like they are doing women a favor by objectifying them?Same, in my early 20s! And when I backed out when the shoot was just going too far, suddenly he did a 180- no more Mr. Nice Guy! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/09/21 01:53 AM |
| 35 | Can we talk about men who act like they are doing women a favor by objectifying them?Hi photographer, would you kindly capture something men need to see in myself, namely my fierce determination, wry sense of humor, wildly creative spirit, my passions, goals, and strong ability to empathize....all while fully clothed? Because I feel like mainly what they’re seeing is my tits. Thanks so much! Photographer’s response: I fEeL lIkE wE mIgHt NoT Be A mAtCh, NoOdS HuRdUr | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/09/21 01:49 AM |
| 220 | A “real woman” and he isn’t joking 🥴Go forth with the confidence of Sean, 39, when the check comes. Thou shalt not feel that thou “owes” for thy $20 dinner, so long as men exist who seeketh free 5-in-1 (chauffeur, escort, nanny, cook, cleaner) services. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/21 05:06 AM |
| 67 | When friends enjoy the circus 🤡I nod and smile, “Ok, I’m here for you, if it ever gets to the point where you’re truly ready to just...well...you know...🙂...oh would you pass me the salt, please?” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/21 04:59 AM |
| 99 | Thoughts?I don’t believe such an agreement would hold water in court. Sounds overall rather naive and probably lacking the maturity for parenthood. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/21 04:55 AM |
| 10 | Saying she post on FDS isn't an insult to me, there is a reason this is my main account IDC.Digging through post history to “HURDUR She FDS”? Oh sir I wish you would, and I do hope you see this one. As someone who has experienced it, they aren’t looking through your post history to boost the argument. They know their argument is shot, and they aren’t getting anywhere by staying on the topic that was being discussed. They are looking through it because losing power (social media likely being the only place they can experience any) makes them feel hurt, and they have devolved to the poin… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/09/21 02:47 PM |
| 45 | My therapy after reading so many shitty stories about LVMIt would be cool to have a coordinated FDS Rescue Team with its own Discord, where we can swap tips, stories, and successful missions :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/09/21 03:27 AM |
| 12 | Why does rejection still hurt?Mods, I hope we can talk about this subject more on the sub. Maybe give it its own flair. Not to wallow in loneliness, but to acknowledge a very real feeling I think a lot of us with- well some would say “high”, but I would say- reasonable and healthy standards in terms of how we are treated by romantic partners, friends, and family, have. It’s a feeling that I think colors how we approach dating, it’s our biggest Achilles heel in our decision making and it’s foundational in pick-me behavior...t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/09/21 03:20 AM |
| 79 | It's peak PUA season. Be on alert at all times!I’ll never understand the feet stamping over how such-and-such a woman had such a rotten personality, boohoo. If a man’s criteria didn’t begin and end with how her body looks and what it can do for him and how it will impress his friends, and he actually got to know and vet “it” first, problematic/incompatible characteristics will show themselves, often quite quickly. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/21 06:47 PM |
| 6 | Low Effort Dates | Online DatingI agree with this fully! How invested can they really be in someone whose face they’ve never seen? That’s why I stopped OLD- they’re just not that into it, and it shakes out to be a waste of everyone’s time. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/09/21 01:16 AM |
| 11 | Hotels in Turkey are banning men from staying without women because "they're harassing girls to try and hook up with"Haha tell us they require chaperones to be in public without telling us they require chaperones to be in public. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/09/21 01:03 AM |
| 6 | Y’all, he put a stuffed animal on me.Thanks for this. Can we just clone these sorts so there are more to go around? 😉 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/09/21 01:02 AM |
| 51 | Tell all the men you know to get in on this class action to drive the payout down to pennies, then delete and let those who remain initiate messages to bots.Forgive me if the words “Allow me to court you, my little prince” dry up my nethers like the Sahara. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/21 12:03 AM |
| 474 | The amount of hypocrisy I've seen from men is just staggering.Well yes. If you present 0 options for winning, and no matter what you do is wrong, that’s how they control you. The nature of control is to convey the message you will never be good enough so you will spend the rest of your life attempting to gain approval you’ll never really have, as you’re fundamentally hated. So, rather than being on that hamster wheel, may as well do what makes you happy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/21 03:25 AM |
| 55 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 26 - The 16 Rules of Misogyny - Part 1omfg I LOVE this episode. And it does dovetail with dating. What especially resonates is rule 3, that women who self-advocate are exclusionary and selfish. I had this happen. I might make this its own post. I had a man suggest a coffee date. I loathed these even before FDS. They do not work for me. They feel business-like, like interviews. There is no romance to them (unless it is a place where drinks can also be had- you go and have that 8pm coffee, I’ll be opting for cabarnet). I declined, and… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/09/21 04:25 PM |
| 17 | Came across this while doing research...I have no illusions that it’s an uphill battle, but for the sake of my radfem predecessors, suffragettes, and other women who made enormous sacrifices to gain liberties I now enjoy....I am willing to try! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/08/21 02:37 AM |
| 59 | The controversy on engagement rings shows how far liberal feminism has goneIt’s about investment to me. Not even about being materialistic. If the man paid nothing for the ring, but what he did do was spend months of his labor forging, soldering, cutting, polishing, setting....that would mean the world to me too. Obviously, most do not possess the skill to do this, hence the expectation of a quality store bought ring, or one from family that has been entrusted to and restored to be just right for me. If he’s wealthy and the cost of the ring is nothing to him, I would w… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/08/21 01:48 AM |
| 70 | I just…🤦🏻♀️oh my god TW: DVI just had a funny vision in my head of this scenario being acted out in a comedy sketch, but then in comes a group of no-nonsense women in shirts that say “FDS” on the back, like they’re emergency personnel. I await the day where the brand has the funding to sustain both the podcast and a YT COPS-esque sketch series of faux trailers a la “This Week, on FDS Rescue Missions....” that just takes these wackadoodle stories from Reddit and adds some levity with a fantasy of what it would look like if… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/08/21 01:34 AM |
| 47 | Another Scrote Sticker ChartThis is super weird, as if she derives pleasure from playing this mommy role to a grown man. As bizarre as it is, the best I can hope she’s genuinely happy in this dynamic that pulls one more LVM out of the pool because if she secretly isn’t, JFC this is one hell of a cope. Either way, it needs a disclaimer that says “Not intended to normalize babying grown men. No one should have to do this. We are not normal!” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/08/21 01:28 AM |
| 21 | Came across this while doing research...I don’t see the article, but I imagine she’s still criminally liable as being complicit in the murder. So she’ll likely do jail time. Wouldn’t it be great if there wasn’t so much bullshit surrounding FDS with low value “but what about me” men myopically zooming in on the horrific practice of paying for dates, their too freely given sexuality, and women having standards/venting when it’s SO hard to find anyone who meets them (which often simply amounts to basic decency)? And that there was a bett… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/08/21 01:21 AM |
| 58 | I’m so jaded and cynical. I want to find this sweet but part of me feels uncomfortable knowing the amount of time he had to spend with a bunch of underage girls to make this. Also, IT guys are notoriously creepyIt’s wholesome to me. I can’t assume he’s checking out the girls bc he’s IT. And I know a lot of people hate these public proposals, but it seemed up the couple’s alley (you can tell when the woman hates it), and it serves a good example for the kids- who hear smp this, smp that, and girls end up settling for crumbs- to see what Making An Effort looks like. Hell, the video almost has something to do with dating strategy. If I linked the whole thing to my distaste for patriarchy at all, it’s that… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/08/21 02:49 PM |
| 73 | Imagine an unknowing woman finally gets her guy to go to relationship therapy and it's this guy. This is why we never utilize men for any type of therapy or coaching!Lol, “Hello, I am OKC typical. Practically an archetype. You should date me, not one of the other 1,000 matches that say literally the exact same things that I do. Do what benefits ME. Please? 🥺 DO IT🤬” Suck it up, guys. Enough of the grandstanding. You call yourself a “master”, but you’ve told on yourself that you’re a slave to the validation of getting sex that more and more women are freeing themselves from. Most women, you could not pay them for this, and those that would, will cost a pretty… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/08/21 11:20 PM |
| 4 | An LVM will bring you downSome lighter fare: this quote is reminding me of Shrek. I didn’t have a problem with the change, as she’d already been ogre part time, kinda seemed to like it so long as someone would accept her for it (and actively chose it in the second film when they could’ve both stayed conventionally attractive), beauty is in the eye of the beholder, she got to be physically stronger, and I felt like Shrek did clean up the douchiness, if not the slob stuff (but she was a bit of one too, bc it’s how ogres ro… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/08/21 11:08 PM |
| 3 | Yesterday I noticed my 11 year old son manspreading…For the sake of the young girls in my life I care very much about, I am encouraged by and grateful for moms like you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/08/21 07:31 AM |
| 9 | I desperately need more women friendsA good friend of mine has been using BumbleBFF, and it’s been working out well for her. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/08/21 07:06 AM |
| 27 | Imagine a LVM giving this to you as a gift…..I feel bad for the girl that received this… Can we not encourage this behaviour?!Well, she felt she had to laugh, to keep things running smoothly. If she objected, it would have resulted in being gaslit that she has no sense of humor at best, and a tantrum at worst. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/21 04:18 AM |
| 67 | This is probably exactly how some scrotes process mundane, everyday transactionsHe would never. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/21 04:00 AM |
| 6 | And this is why you should NEVER allow yourself to become financially dependent on a man.To perpetuate a narrative that women feel entitled to male money. If women are seen as morally inferior, in misogynists’ minds, it’s more justification that women need to be controlled. It also justifies a position that it is acceptable to, in turn, use women for sex. Or, they wrote it just to stir shit up because obviously this post would be triggering to men, and trolls find internet fights delightful because they can’t find the same delight in wholesome things as they can in drama and discord… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/21 03:59 AM |
| 25 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 25 - Age Gaps & Old Man Peen + Old Scrote Hits NVM Bingo“amazingly enough it didn’t stop him” It never does! AND then he had the audacity to treat you like shit. The confidence of men. Truly! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/21 06:56 PM |
| 87 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 25 - Age Gaps & Old Man Peen + Old Scrote Hits NVM BingoLove his “ageist” claims. Is he dating anyone 20 years older? Then he has a case. ETA: Speaking of age, would the pod do an episode that addresses concerns specifically related to the 35+ crowd? I feel like we face different challenges- i.e., fetishization by younger (up to early 30s) men, ignored by men our age (even when we don’t look it, once they confirm how old we are), and, as we just in general take better care of ourselves, dealing with the realities of how men even slightly older than u… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/21 07:49 PM |
| 26 | Welp this proves it.I like this, it is very clear. Thanks. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/08/21 05:43 AM |
| 47 | Incels convinced society they just need sex and that’s the biggest con ever: The Rage of the IncelsMaybe I worded it unclearly. The women I know condemn it with an air of disgust, but they genuinely act as if they had 0 idea that this was a thing. Meanwhile, I’m seeing it as even more than just this well-known-to-me one thing relegated to an easily isolated bunch...but more like an epicenter, and the misogyny radiating outward, at varying degrees. I’ve thought this through more and have a theory (though I don’t know that I’m right!). Truth be told, middle aged women, unless they look young, o… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/08/21 03:14 AM |
| 171 | Incels convinced society they just need sex and that’s the biggest con ever: The Rage of the IncelsLegitimate question: I see women (never men) on my social media commenting on this phenom, as if it’s brand new and very niche and they’re like “What is this thing?”, when I feel like I encounter it (even when I was partnered) all the time for decades now....how is this social dynamic slipping under the radar by them? Most of them aren’t exceptionally attractive, but do average women not get harassed on the street? Do they not understand that to strangers who are men, they are still largely view… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/08/21 11:59 PM |
| 14 | My first ever HV wins!Good stuff. How did you find him? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/08/21 11:24 PM |
| 89 | Welp this proves it.I don’t understand the part that says “honor is removal to the pedestal”. What does that mean? Does she mean it is “putting women on a pedestal”? But that doesn’t sound quite right either. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/08/21 11:21 PM |
| 38 | Starting to Regret Getting TattooedA waitress who serves overpriced bottles of liquor (which is the price of admission to sit in a seat) at a club that may or may not be any good (both the liquor and the club). Mainly it serves as a “look what I can afford” status symbol for many customers, but a lot of folks will just look at you like you’re a sucker if you’re a guy (who are the ones who usually pay that 10x markup, as it’s common for them to invite attractive women to come sit at their table, who figure some boring convo is wor… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/08/21 06:26 AM |
| 39 | A Pickme's LifeSometimes when I see shit like this, I wonder if it’s not what it seems. I wonder if somewhere in the woman’s subconscious, she knows damn well something is off (possibly some ancestral DNA? 😅), the resentment bubbles up, and this is her way of not only tamping it down, but trying to normalize his behavior via couching it in giggles, to ensure that other women accept what she does, to make her situation (that she has no intention of leveling out of) seem more ok. The posts, intended to sound aff… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/08/21 06:07 AM |
| 508 | What’s your best FDS quote?Men move mountains for what they truly want. If he wanted to, he would. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/08/21 02:14 AM |
| 133 | Woman tells her Scrote boyfriend about a bad sexual experience she had; he is upset because that means "He had a big enough dick to hurt you, and I don't. :("I dOn’T wAnT tO sEeM lIkE i’M cReAtInG cOnFlIcT 🤪 Sorry, don’t mean to be the unkind to her, but these anecdotes of feeling forced to coddle while getting 0 support of your own are exhausting and the longer fully sound-of-mind women keep this shit up like they’re Alzheimer’s patients who have 0 self-advocacy skills and need a guiding hand, just so they can tell the world I Haz Boyfren!, the longer it’s going to take for the collective standard to rise. I guess I’m just in a mood today after decl… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/08/21 10:20 PM |
| 13 | More reasons not to entertain pickmes - these girls know what they're doing to other women.I see-saw. Empathetic me is like “Won’t you take a look at the patriarchal system we live under, it’s no wonder some women are still asleep and etc. etc. etc.” Hardass me is like “Take a look around, there is female support everywhere. Connect to it. Stop crossing the picket line, you’re betraying the union.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/08/21 07:13 PM |
| 59 | Old as dirt scrote tries to hit on much younger (and richer) woman at gym. She acts like a Queen 👑Agreed. I take the headphones off initially for anyone, in case it’s a legitimate inquiry. If I learn it’s not and it’s just a come on, back in they go. If they attempt to continue, I do the “one second” finger in the air, to complete whatever I’m doing. When it’s not a truly practical issue (such as wanting to use whatever equipment I am), men like this one are too proud to be on standby for a minute, like a fool, just to resume their flirting....they never find it worth it. So they shove off e… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/08/21 06:53 PM |
| 175 | OP upset that a Tinder match cut it off after a “public place” date following chatting and a virtual date. FDS working in the wild. 👑WHAT is going on here? I don’t get the sense that men don’t want us, because they talk about and think about us constantly, and how hard dating is for them. They don’t just go see sex workers. Yet I see them do much, much more for other things they want, because they have to. Is this due to too many women in the pool having low standards (which men like)- women who would accept a date like this- and higher (read: acceptable) standards are outliers that confuse men? If so, I guess we just need to… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/08/21 06:14 PM |
| 28 | The audacity of a zero value manThe value I have extracted from this is that I need to calm my tits about whether I am enough for those who meet my very reasonable standards. Intellectually I know that anyone who has me self-doubting is doing so as a power play, but the societal pressures are hard to shake. Yet this man has none of that stress, and he’s doing just fine. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/08/21 02:00 PM |
| 26 | The audacity of a zero value manI would be so embarrassed to be wasting the time of the woman on that call. And yet there seems to be no shame here. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/08/21 12:32 PM |
| 146 | The audacity of a zero value manThe confidence of men. Truly. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/08/21 02:24 AM |
| 25 | Don't help your man find a job. And don't help women who ask you to help theirsngl I am dying to know who and will be keeping an eye out for 80s stars who specifically are coming out with new projects in the coming months 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/08/21 03:55 AM |
| 8 | Guy self-invites himself to dinner at girl’s home, gets angry she never gave him a heads up (to something he invited himself to?) - this is why we stay away from LVMI love to see that FDS efficiency so well articulated! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/08/21 07:11 PM |
| 89 | Guy self-invites himself to dinner at girl’s home, gets angry she never gave him a heads up (to something he invited himself to?) - this is why we stay away from LVMToo much emotional energy expended for my taste, on someone whose name will not be remembered in a year, and who will not remember hers. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/08/21 04:35 AM |
| 209 | Uh oh even the country gals are going FDS. These scrotes are really in trouble now! I love it.I love it so much. It’s like she’s saying the things that women are thinking but are scared to express. I hope artists with broad reach continue to create this content....there is definitely something about humor and/or music that makes it more palatable and “stickier” to the public consciousness. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/07/21 04:07 PM |
| 10 | Feminist artwork by @melrh_artThat first one is dope. I’d wear that on a shirt. It’s very Riot Grrrl. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/07/21 02:02 AM |
| 35 | You ever get genuinely upset at the amount of effort guys put into themselves?This. At the bare minimum, he is off your back. Best case scenario, it’s a favor from you to him, that motivates him to level up on putting effort into himself. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/07/21 01:51 AM |
| 111 | Don't give into other women shaming you, keep that bar extra highThis is why women need to strengthen bonds on our shared experiences. If we did so, it would lessen this desperate need to be validated by men. Tomorrow, choose a woman who could really use it, and compliment her on a personal achievement of hers that has nothing to do with sexual or romantic involvement with men, and encourage her to build on the skills she utilized to attain that achievement. It’s small, but in a culture that still centers a woman’s ultimate worth on partnership, reminders of … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/07/21 01:48 AM |
| 123 | Eye opening but depressing Tiktok account about the true nature of men (and it’s all of them)“If she doesn’t submit to your whims at the expense of her own safety and well-being, cut her loose.” Yes! If this is how your brain works, guy, please DO walk away! In fact, don’t even pursue a first date. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/07/21 02:18 AM |
| 31 | Was Joshua Jackson’s Public Reveal That His Wife Proposed a Passive Aggressive Attempt to Humiliate Her and Promote His ManhoodI think based on past remarks she made, this wouldn’t humiliate her as she’s actually quite proud of it. Ugh, don’t get me started. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/07/21 02:07 AM |
| 12 | I feel…asexual?So relatable. I feel this too. Once I joined FDS, this lead me to radfem lit, and once the curtain was pulled back...once I had a handle on how most men see us, I can’t unsee what I’ve seen. I hold out hope that men can be better, that we can transform from a society that doesn’t encourage them to be so, to one where women are more vocal about their needs. FDS has only existed since 2019, TwoX is getting better, I see likeminded content on other SM platforms. So, it’s possible, that we hit a tip… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 11:29 PM |
| 16 | Why are all female halloween costumes sexual??Backstory: Your character is dramatically in “mourning”, but you let little asides slip that imply you offed him. Carry an innocuous potential murder weapon 😈 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 10:55 PM |
| 17 | Living rent free in his head: A guy I criticized YEARS ago turned his life around because of a comment I made.I’m glad someone said it. It all comes off as very unnecessary and I’m also unclear how it relates to dating strategy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 10:50 PM |
| 79 | Toxic femininity. What's your take on this?This is how I always saw it. If a woman stands on a chair and loudly points out to another woman in the group that she looks a fat wh*re in that dress and has no business wearing it, to me that’s toxic masculinity. If the woman in the dress simpers and instead of clapping back or paying it no mind, internalizes the insult and actually starts feeling bad about herself and dressing differently, that’s toxic femininity. Aggressive and externalized misogyny vs. passive and internalized misogyny. Bot… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 10:43 PM |
| 10 | Porn teaches men to derive pleasure from causing women pain. This blatant misogyny is in full view and being promoted by lvm and libfems with internalized misogynyCan you imagine WWE wrestling has a warning sign saying "Do not try these moves at home. It can cause serious injury or death." Yet porn, which now has even more extreme content than the average WWE wrestling episode, has no warning signs? This! Why is there no warning to make it crystal clear that this should not be tried at home? Lawsuits, right? What if something bad did happen to a woman or gay man as a result of copying porn? Can any of these companies be held liable for not making it clear… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 01:30 AM |
| 14 | Porn teaches men to derive pleasure from causing women pain. This blatant misogyny is in full view and being promoted by lvm and libfems with internalized misogynyImagine a summarized version of this that Anonymous creates a pop-up of, that comes up on every visit to the Tube sites, like a Surgeon General’s warning 😃 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/21 10:32 PM |
| 19 | Porn teaches men to derive pleasure from causing women pain. This blatant misogyny is in full view and being promoted by lvm and libfems with internalized misogynyI will keep this in mind and I hope it works for me should I encounter someone HV. I would like to think that he understands that the line of questioning is there to protect myself, and that it’s LV men that are creating the need for that strategy in the first place, not me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/21 08:00 PM |
| 50 | Porn teaches men to derive pleasure from causing women pain. This blatant misogyny is in full view and being promoted by lvm and libfems with internalized misogynyThat requires some time spent with the man to look for context clues. From past experience, I know this could take months. I was looking for something more efficient and direct- a line of questioning/investigation from the top....much like we do with smoking/drinking/religious affiliation/etc. But perhaps a trick that cuts through any lying. Pretending that I’m cool with porn so he feels free to be truthful first came to mind, but then I ditched that strategy as if he is HV, that reflects badly … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/21 07:08 PM |
| 89 | Porn teaches men to derive pleasure from causing women pain. This blatant misogyny is in full view and being promoted by lvm and libfems with internalized misogynyQuestion- does anyone ask new prospective partners about how many hours a week they spend watching porn? If so, how do you go about it and when? I ask because I would strongly prefer someone who watches sparingly, if at all. From a dependency perspective, it is damaging, as smoking cigarettes is (and I am seeing the porn industry react defensively now, much the same as the tobacco industry did in the 60s, when research against smoking health hazards began to gain traction). And while it may not … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/21 05:39 PM |
| 1 | For episode 20 of the podcast, we will be doing an extra-special (and extra long) listener feedback episode! Comment below with your questions/feedback for a chance to be discussed on the podcast!Same. The filters discussed above, I’m assuming that’s for pro accounts, as with a basic account, I can’t even make age or location a dealbreaker. And I’m not against a pro account- I had one. But when I set my filters to, say, filtering out any man who wouldn’t have sex on a first date, and/or “demisexual”...you know, a basic respect for the value and risk of sex (which I care far more about than waistlines and hairlines), I just got It LoOkS lIkE nO oNe FiTs YoUr StAnDaRdS tRy BrOaDeNiNg YoUr … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/21 05:22 PM |
| 1 | For episode 20 of the podcast, we will be doing an extra-special (and extra long) listener feedback episode! Comment below with your questions/feedback for a chance to be discussed on the podcast!Seconding this. But with also addressing the balance between benevolence and protecting our own energies. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/21 04:59 PM |
| 89 | A Very Long Post About Talking to Guys in the WildGreat post! It’s an excellent life skill to have in general. Aside from anything romantic, this cold approach has lead to professional, friendship, favors, and intel opportunities for me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/21 02:32 AM |
| 22 | How can you deal with celibacy & accept it?This thread is amazing. It’s the part of FDS that I struggle with the most. Eliminating LVM hasn’t meant a flood of HVM has replaced it, it’s just meant empty space. But I understand better why I crave what I do. And I’ve gotten to where I have reframed my need for emotional intimacy in sex as something like a kink (and we’re not kink shaming women these days, right?)- something that just kind of has to be a part of the experience and (since men are so reluctant to engage in it, and a loving att… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/07/21 09:34 PM |
| 36 | What is FDS’s thoughts on this? Joshua Jackson responds to wife Jodie Turner-Smith saying their relationship started off with a one-night-stand: 'Technically it was a three-night stand'I kind of am on the “both” train as well. Don’t get me wrong, she’s gorgeous, but the whole announcement of their casual sex kick-off from the both of them, as if it’s a badge of honor, is just disappointing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/07/21 05:31 PM |
| 135 | The text that started it all … this is when I learned what gaslighting was …Congratulations on having what was actually high “self-asteam” (SP) and the confidence to peace out! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/07/21 05:27 PM |
| 9 | This guy has convinced himself that his girlfriend is the problem, despite his explosive anger toward her...Just a heads up OP, somehow you got this posted in duplicate on the sub. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/07/21 05:23 PM |
| 37 | The comments all say "men are dumb, he's being practical" but completely disregard what this means for how he values his hobbies over his girlfriend. SmhThis is really confirming something I’ve suspected given my interactions on OLD. Men theoretically would not mind a long term commitment as another added asset, but most do not value and therefore prioritize it, in the way they do wealth or external male validation. I cannot feel sad for them when they whine about not getting sex. I really can’t. A craving is not the same as a dearly held value. I don’t really know how we change that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/21 02:18 AM |
| 8 | What FDS is finally helping me realize...The LVM of Oz, starring Judy Garland as Pickmeisha Gale, Billie Burke as the High Value Witch of the North, Margaret Hamilton as The Wicked Witch of the Patriarchy, and ✨👠👠✨as “FDS” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/07/21 02:58 AM |
| 78 | A reminder from history not too long ago: many of your elders didn’t have an easier time in marriage as men like to claim. It was only because of the RvR case in 1991, that the English court system legally recognised that raping your wife was a crime.Often when I state my blessings in meditation, particularly when I had some gain I could have never achieved 50 years ago, I express gratitude for the women who came before me who made unimaginable sacrifices, that we benefit from today. Let me tell you, if they made one of those patron saint candles for Dworkin, I would buy one! There is still so much work to do, and I hope in some way I can effect change in small ways that can help the girls out there, whose futures I worry about. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/07/21 02:46 AM |
| 27 | Again with the height thing....This is a fairy tale. He didn’t actually do this. Tall men happily and guiltlessly reap all of the rewards they receive for their genetic blessing and do not concern themselves with the competition. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/07/21 01:07 AM |
| 4 | Negative effects of combining childcare and housework.Great article, and happy cake day, OP! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/21 03:19 PM |
| 109 | So the LVM in my city are pulling this now. Thoughts on how to respond ladies? It was that “let me get the first you get the second” line. She declined a 2d date and got this in reply.If you can’t accept that you may not be a winner and that gambling is a form of entertainment- win or lose- do not sit at the table at the casino. You may wander around and watch others play, enjoy the excitement second hand, but the gambling part is not for you. Men who cannot accept that women are doing alright without his personal penis, just like the casino is doing alright without his personal chips, cannot win at this. I’m sorry lurker men, maybe collectively master your desires instead of… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/21 03:12 PM |
| 50 | Let them get a taste of their own poison and see how they react.Yeah I’m with you on that. I can already tell when it’s a test to see what abuse I’ll accept, masked as JoOoOkE. I just block and delete. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/21 02:58 PM |
| 43 | My friend matched with a guy on OLD. He sent her this..... what in the???Omg you’re right. They do undermine women doing sex work. I don’t condone sex work, but, I know there are women who truly find it to be their only option, and as far as those who are doing it for fun and profit, well, in my mind, if you’re going to do it with no emotional investment, there may as well be a financial one. To have sex with ZERO investment undercuts sex workers’ business. I didn’t even think of that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/07/21 01:52 AM |
| 6 | List of BoundariesGood on these boundaries. One I’m not clear on though, with respect to the STDs, in view of HIPPA laws, can you even do that, even if someone says “this person can see my test results”? How does the clinic know it’s even you? Seems like it could be a slippery slope otherwise for people sneaking in on other’s private business. For anyone wondering how else this might be achieved, in my experience, labs/urgent care/PCP’s have patient portals where results are kept. He’d have to log in, in front of… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/07/21 01:45 AM |
| 5 | My adds on Youtube 🧓🏻🤮 Google knows I'm 27 and the company that bought these adds thinks it's fine to normalize dinossaurs on my age rangeHey OP! Now I know this might sound a little crazy, but these guys are actually rather open to dating you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/07/21 01:36 AM |
| 83 | My friend matched with a guy on OLD. He sent her this..... what in the???It’s the idea of getting it as cheaply (ideally, free) as possible. It’s up to the suppliers, really, to act collectively and set a standard for what can ever be reasonably expected. This is why artists encourage other artists to not work “for opportunity for exposure” (so, “free”), if it is obvious that the producer does in fact have it in the budget to compensate monetarily. It is how we have labor laws. It is why you can no longer smoke indoors in most public places. Those who benefit from ex… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/07/21 01:15 AM |
| 15 | Currently in the grieving process after YEARS of being a pickme. I am relieved to finally have arrived here. Sadness and loneliness is okay. It means I'm healingSending you support! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/07/21 12:32 AM |
| 17 | How do you ladies feel about friends that prioritize their boyfriends?All good advice here, and I want to add (because I’ve been through it), after you’ve distanced yourself (which she’ll hardly notice when times are good), keep it that way. You don’t want to be “the backup plan” to be her emotional support when he’s not around/when they’re fighting, when she’s not reciprocating that support to you. And you definitely do not want to be caught in the cycle of “placeholder”, where she enters your life fully again, if they break up, and you expend all this emotional … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/21 03:56 AM |
| 93 | What an absolutely vile person!I was thinking that, but then wondered if she’s sticking around until the younger sister can get out too. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/21 03:39 AM |
| 58 | Why I don't feel empathy for unattractive menUnpopular opinion maybe but...why even devote any of your precious emotional energy to this? I get that the behavior is annoying. But when it comes down to it, I have no inherent problem with the slothful type, because the inside is showing on the outside, and barring a t-shirt that says “As a boyfriend, I will slowly erode you”, there is no clearer sign that that is fruit I shouldn’t be eating. They’re doing the work for you by telling on themselves. I want exactly two things from men who won’t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/21 03:32 AM |
| 36 | Are men supposed to be mind readers?! No, you're supposed to read body language.Well, they’re certainly achieving that, because on top of the discomfort of being on high alert for boundary crossing, anxiety tends to give me gas pains. Infuriating. If I was more of a dick with 0 consideration for the others around me, I’d just let them rip. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/21 02:35 AM |
| 86 | ALL men benefit from the actions of bad, violent and repugnant men.If a man won’t be sympathetic to radical feminism, and won’t call out other men, turn him down just like you’d turn down an abuser. Turn. Him. Down. You can try explaining and communicating, but losing access to female sexuality is the language they truly understand, and sometimes that’s just what you’ve got to do. It’s not foolproof, but I 100% have seen men step up, when women don’t just talk the talk, but walk the walk. Stay strong! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/21 01:28 AM |
| 138 | Are men supposed to be mind readers?! No, you're supposed to read body language.My arms are crossed, I’m not making eye contact, I’ve been giving one word answers for 3 minutes straight (I’d tell you to leave me alone if it didn’t mean the emotional labor of having to placate your tantrum energy when I blatantly reject you), my entire body is turned away WHY ARE YOU STILL MAKING A MOVE AND HOW IS AN UNENGAGED WOMAN EVEN APPEALING | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/21 01:22 AM |
| 2 | Is the transitioning stage always this hard?This is a fucking amazing turnaround on your part. Yes, this initial chaos is common. Read about extinction bursts. Adults do them too. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/07/21 09:44 PM |
| 78 | For episode 20 of the podcast, we will be doing an extra-special (and extra long) listener feedback episode! Comment below with your questions/feedback for a chance to be discussed on the podcast!This is constructive, and please keep in mind I very much enjoy this show, listen religiously, am a Patreon patron. My feedback is I would love to see some of the funds go towards a mic for Savannah that matches what others are using. She has a lot of valuable input and it would be good to be able to hear her more clearly. Thanks for all you do! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/07/21 09:11 PM |
| 19 | What are ways we can help the children of today?We already teach kids the physical risks of sexual relationships. What if we also taught them about the power dynamics of sexual relationships, the risks to both sexes (and who, ahem, disproportionately assumes them), as well as the emotional risks of sexual/romantic relationships? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/21 11:00 PM |
| 24 | When you follow a financial literacy page and then they start posting this shit... Unfollowed!Wait so, do you only buy one half the suit, and he buys the sleeves and pant legs in order to make it actually usable? Forgive me, I struggle with interpretation of passages from The Gospel of Pickme. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/21 09:41 PM |
| 82 | When you follow a financial literacy page and then they start posting this shit... Unfollowed!He buys you “a shoe” and you buy him a suit? You can’t do anything with half a pair, that’s not 50/50! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/21 08:23 PM |
| 48 | The Red Flag Song!I mean, R. Kelly had the confidence to audaciously release 33 chapters, so I see no reason not to keep going with this 🤷♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/21 02:13 AM |
| 39 | The only man I will consider having sex withWhenever men say “Physical touch, especially the SeXuAl PaRt”, say “No, No, No. That’s not how love languages work. Love languages involve demonstrations of love that you would not engage in with someone you do not love, and in fact, actually dislike.” Men will have sex with women they despise, but those affectionate, nonsexual gestures, not happening. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/21 01:37 AM |
| 23 | Don’t.do.this ladiesWho else has this friend or family member? How do you handle it? Have you given up? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/21 01:15 AM |
| 125 | The Red Flag Song!Oh boy, she saved the worst one for last! 🐱🐶🐰 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/21 01:12 AM |
| 369 | I don’t know anything about this family. But this video is absolutely heartwarming.I think I just found my bar. I don’t have a special needs child, but I’d ask myself, “If I did have a special needs child, would this man actively help in supporting my child’s well-being?” My guess is the answer would generally be “nope”. But if the answer was yes, we’re on. It’s such a good metric, because it’s so hard (a top act of service, which is my #1 love language, due to the effort required). My father did it, with my older half-brother (who can be pretty challenging). I’m no less than … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/21 01:08 AM |
| 199 | It isn’t that bad…“WhUt AbOuT GeTtInG kIcKeD iN tHe BaLlS tHo?” Just kidding. I love this. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/21 06:10 AM |
| 18 | Why do (straight) men try so hard to appeal to the male gaze on dating apps?Ah, just the thing for a “field” or “walk” date! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/21 05:16 AM |
| 49 | Why do (straight) men try so hard to appeal to the male gaze on dating apps?Yes, I have to add the houseplants and gardening/cottagecore flex as well! Lol this is venturing into either HER or OurTime profile territory 😅 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/21 04:34 AM |
| 221 | Why do (straight) men try so hard to appeal to the male gaze on dating apps?And you can tell them “No, that’s not the way”, and they’ll just insist that it’s totally what women want to see and keep doing it anyway, even if it’s failing. Like imagine if my profile consisted of me doing needlepoint, showing off my tea set or fancy nail art, at my women’s ecstatic dance group, or me at a table on a date just as the man is reaching for the check. I’m sure I’d be killing it 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/21 03:56 AM |
| 28 | Yet another reminder: If he wanted to, he would- a field reportCame here to say the same! So nice to feel balanced and secure. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/21 03:48 AM |
| 7 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 17 - Scrotation Management : The Benefits of Multi-DatingYou found an HVM who had just downloaded the app? That is ridiculously lucky. I would love if there was a way to see which men were new to the apps, and/or had the most fleshed out bios. I would pay for that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/07/21 10:11 PM |
| 15 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 17 - Scrotation Management : The Benefits of Multi-DatingThis resonates with me as well! Even with the pre-screening call, I do not find myself in the position to where there are enough men even worth the time/who value me enough as a human to establish a rotation. If they make it past the OLD pre-screening (and don’t offer just “coffee” or “walk”), the first date- where I put my own best foot forward- quickly confirms that time spent with them is not exciting and making out with them (much less sex with them)- on their timeline anyway- would not be e… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/07/21 10:05 PM |
| 442 | imagine being happy because a little kid is crying 🤡🤡I can’t imagine a woman ever saying those things. What is wrong with these creatures. And they call this a “hate sub”. Crickets in addressing actual hate. ETA: To the lurkers, whose comments I can’t see before they’re gone but that I get the gist of: Just stop. Stop waving this away. No, women aren’t going to call children “sluts” unless it’s some outlier out-of-her-mind monster. And that person could never be out in the open as she would be torn down immediately, especially by other women. We’r… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/06/21 11:05 AM |
| 3 | do men just turn into complete POS when they hit 50 or is it that generation?It’s Reddit. Disproportionately low value. Not all men (I know, I know, I don’t mean that in the hashtaggy way, I’m just answering literally) of that age are like that. Moreover, the men that are like that at that age, were always- barring some TBI- mentally like that, i.e. seeing women as trophies and not human. It’s just that when facing mortality and loss of vitality, there becomes this urge to have that last blast, kind of like how men do if like, they’re going to prison soon or something. W… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/06/21 04:32 AM |
| 125 | “Boost your confidence by humiliating yourself and subjecting yourself to constant male rejection.”Well shit. Looks like this account doesn’t exist anymore. I was going to comment, how about mustering the confidence to ask for a raise? Or to ask for a fair price on something that’s unreasonably priced? You know, stuff with a material benefit. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/06/21 04:07 AM |
| 5 | Facts!!! 🔥“Does this mediocre man think I’m sexy”, omg yes! Highly relatable! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/06/21 06:23 AM |
| 78 | FDS Weekly Chat / Check-InJust wanted to shout out the sub FemaleLevelUpStrategy that currently has a great pinned post about time management. Check it out! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/06/21 06:11 AM |
| 7 | If you say "I pay for my own dinner so that I don't owe the man anything" then you are admitting that you believe women are obligated to sleep with a man if he spends money on her.Women have to remember this: there is value in sex with a woman. A lot of value. Men try to downplay that value to get women to second guess themselves, but when it comes down to brass tacks, if it’s “meh”, why do they crave it so badly? Why are they so deeply motivated by it? In a way that we are not deeply craving a nice date, that we could easily provide for ourselves and have just as nice of a time? And it’s not just the demand. It’s also the disproportionate risk to a biologically female bo… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/06/21 01:05 AM |
| 6 | Daily reminder on how our culture works. Remember; you can never be strict enough, don't be afraid to vet, vet, vet!Any kind of false dichotomies aside that questioning this particular claim = “you’re denying child abuse!” (no, I’m not)...um, what with this? The Oedipus complex was a term attributed to both boys and girls (later Jung used “Electra complex” for girls exclusively, though Freud rejected this), so how does this theory fit with that? Were boys alleging abuse from their mothers? Did boys never confide abuse by their fathers and if they did, how does that shake out here with a parent of the same sex… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/06/21 12:53 AM |
| 35 | Apparently Reddit does not think that ADVOCATING CHILD MURDER violates their Terms of Service. This is from our "satire" sub (basically just a bunch of incels pretending to be us and saying outrageous shit to try and get us banned)I would support it if the “G” was actually adhered to....just GO. GO, and don’t look back. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/06/21 02:11 AM |
| 107 | The author said both positions were “totally reasonable.”Well, you know, it’s better for him to sit up there so he can grab her some fancier snacks, and also to get off the plane first in order to grab one of those hard-to-come-by luggage carts. Or something. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/06/21 02:07 AM |
| 59 | The author said both positions were “totally reasonable.”I have never not been able to get a table somewhere. It’s an excuse to get settled in with a beverage sooner than later. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/06/21 02:04 AM |
| 28 | Worried about coworkerWhen this all goes to shit, she’s going to miss those cats. It made me want to hold my own a little tighter just now 🐱 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/06/21 02:01 AM |
| 15 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 16 - Walk Dates are For Dogs - (feat. Viral Tik Tok Star @Kokobeaute)Omg yes. It's like, don't assume the worst about men! But also, don't go to their homes if you don't intend to have sex, because you need to assume the worst about men. So which is it? Recent convo: LVM 1: "Nothing wrong with assuming his place = sex". Me: "Ok, if it's SO assumed, why dance around it? Why not directly say, come to my place and have sex with me. Is it because...it's not a guarantee, which would therefore make the request crass? And thus, the hopeful man is trying to be tricky at … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/06/21 05:43 PM |
| 2 | Just listened to the bonus episode of cosmopolitan & emotional labor on the podcastJFC why not just treat him as you would a negligent roommate? It’s not that hard. Keep your own toilet paper that’s just for you. Do your own laundry. Make food only for yourself. Sex is just you pleasing you. Messes you can’t do much about I suppose, because they’re in the way, but everything else can absolutely be done independently (maybe his messes- dishes, papers, etc.- can just be placed in a pile of his own shit in a corner of the bedroom). Guys like this don’t have a chance at leveling u… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/06/21 10:21 PM |
| 114 | If he wanted to, he would. Never settle for less!“He calls out men when they are exhibiting LV behaviors.” Wow. You’ve landed a rare one. Congrats. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/06/21 03:59 AM |
| 51 | This popped up in my memories. This is HV.This is the kind of movie Disney needs to be making. Not a prince who loves an able-bodied 16-year-old because big whoop. A prince who sticks by a woman going through medical challenges, doing the best she can. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/06/21 04:03 AM |
| 12 | Why I am saying NO to OLD - a lil reflection and thoughtsThat’s a stupid Hinge prompt, like it’s supposed to be an icebreaker or something. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/06/21 02:07 AM |
| 22 | First date failThe thing about dating apps is, they don’t really give a true sense of a person, no matter how good your profile is. Plus, there appear to be many options to men. Plus. there appear to be options better than you, as many of the apps will create fake accounts to engage with men to show and say the things they want to see and hear (they ghost before a date can be planned), to keep the men on the app under the impression that the perfect, accommodating woman who will chase him, not make him work to… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/06/21 01:59 AM |
| 56 | About "Why women everywhere are delaying motherhood" [article from the NYT]I love this. The reality is, raising a child on your own is damn near impossible. So people either partner with people who they are sexually attracted to but who are all wrong for co-parenting, or they pay for help. Paying for childcare can be prohibitively expensive, not to mention there isn’t that same level as investment as there would be here, where everyone’s precious child is in the mix. And I would assume accountability and vetting would be as high as professional help. Plus, this would t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/06/21 01:32 AM |
| 10 | Date a man who is proud of youYes! I was on a different thread explaining (I gave up, it’s not the job of women to explain to men who willfully misunderstand) that Mother’s Special Boy need not be the center of any and all situations and spaces. Sometimes, it is a man’s role to step back. I know we have this issue on the sub re: men who find it egregious that there exists a tiny corner of Reddit where they may not bestow the gift of their opinion, as they can on 1,000,000 other subs where they are free to chatter away. Thank… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/06/21 02:39 PM |
| 137 | Date a man who is proud of youI saw this beautiful, talented, gregarious woman after a high profile performance the other night, and everyone wanted to talk to her afterwards. I knew which man was her husband, and she was so inundated with fans, he wasn’t getting any of her attention. But he did not sulk or show any impatience. He just waited quietly, on the sidelines, beaming, knowing that this was a sign of her success and he looked so proud (he was really cute too!). It warmed my heart to see this support, and made me qui… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/06/21 04:42 AM |
| 2 | Spinster Science EssayFascinating read. I wonder, if any had been able to stay in the home business, were she to develop a superior and/or niche product...a secret, patented formula, is you will (albeit one that only the wealthy would have been able to afford). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/06/21 04:36 AM |
| 23 | Advice from Baba Yaga (written by Taisia Kitaiskaia)Oh man. Yes. The dick poke. Cuddling? Dick poke. A massage after a hard day? Dick poke. Washing the dishes? Dick poke. Relaxing in the hot tub? Dick poke. Don’t get me wrong, I love sex (with the right person), but it’s refreshing to just be physically affectionate sometimes, without a dick poke. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/06/21 02:47 AM |
| 20 | Advice from Baba Yaga (written by Taisia Kitaiskaia)lol i literally said at the top of paragraph 2....😹 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/06/21 07:59 PM |
| 56 | FDS cured some major wedding FOMOI’ll never understand this. So much big macho man talk about the wedding night, and at the end of the day, more effort is put into impressing the boys with doing lots of shots, than holding off, so he can impress his wife post-reception. Is he getting married just to impress “the boys” too? Securing a consistent sex partner just so he can brag that he regularly has sex, and brag about future mini-me’s, to the boys? Is the wife just an ego boost facilitator? Because that’s how it feels sometimes. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/06/21 06:42 PM |
| 68 | Advice from Baba Yaga (written by Taisia Kitaiskaia)I’m in this boat. and honestly the one thing that I miss that is irreplaceable is cuddling with a human. I mean of course a date would take me up on this, but then they get a boner and push for more. You know how they do. I’m only interested in sex in a relationship. Has anyone who is not dating managed some kind of platonic human (please don’t say “body pillow” or “pet”, I already have both) cuddling arrangement with either a woman or man who is not sexually attracted to them, so that doesn’t h… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/06/21 06:28 PM |
| 3 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 14 - Dr. Gail Dines & the Queens Rage Against the Porn MachineThat is such a good idea! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/06/21 06:06 PM |
| 9 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 14 - Dr. Gail Dines & the Queens Rage Against the Porn MachineI loved the comparison of porn to fast food, that it’s junk you’re putting in you. It’s even worse with porn, because she’s right, it alters the mind/changes perception, in a way that affects not just you but an entire population. The porn industry exploits people much like the fast food industry does. I know many men who wouldn’t dream of putting a Big Mac in their body, but won’t hesitate to watch violent porn or be inside the body of someone they know nothing about. If we could equate the two… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/06/21 05:35 PM |
| 3 | "Am I the most beautiful woman in the world?"That mirror, “Her lips blood red, her hair like night, her skin like snow, her name, Snow White”, certainly didn’t help clarify matters! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/06/21 02:14 PM |
| 22 | "Am I the most beautiful woman in the world?"See, if someone had just sat down with the evil queen and explained patriarchy to her, and that while Snow White was- temporarily, mind you- perhaps more aesthetically pleasing as per the beauty standards of the current time, the Queen had her own skills to be proud of- far more adept at strategizing, resource acquisition, etc. etc. Then the whole mess could have been avoided 🤷♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/06/21 03:58 PM |
| 157 | ghosted a man who didn't properly plan a 1st dateIt’s summer! Why do men never think of the festival idea? Literally it’s the “talking side by side” shit that they love (which I don’t but, at least there’s enough to keep me occupied at a festival if the conversation lags), you’re moving, there’s fodder for discussion, music to check out, and plenty of opportunities to say “I value your presence”- street food, drinks, maybe a trinket if he’s feeling real HVM. There is so much going on, you can also take note of each other’s tastes in a variety … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/06/21 07:38 PM |
| 40 | Idk what she was trying to accomplish here, it gives a pick me vibeShe’s processing, trying not to lose hope, and dealing with the shame of what she’s been willing to accept. This can coexist with being inexcusably bratty. Many of us have been there. I too have been the recipient of the “massage” that consists of 5 minutes of low effort upper trap squeezes, and know how it can put you in a worse mood than not being touched at all. Hopefully, she makes the leap into liberation. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/06/21 07:24 PM |
| 9 | Why are there so many stories of shitty men not respecting women’s’ bodily autonomy?“As a man, I can relate to how painful this digging story is, it’s like when women try to dig my gold. My silver. My nickel. Whatever.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/06/21 05:46 PM |
| 15 | It's empowering!!! /sLmao at the 20:30 mark about the cutout dress being unallowable at the club because the rules are strict. Like, a dress with open sides, that is the line in all of this 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/06/21 05:42 PM |
| 28 | The random man I locked eyes with the other week shopping for cool ranch doritos and mountain dew 🥰🥰Perfect choice, as this pic is often used by men, in memes mocking other men....so we don’t wanna hear it, scrotes. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/06/21 05:38 PM |
| 22 | This could be a good FDS readPlease read the article, all! Sales had it right back in 2013, and Tinder tried to silence and shame her back then, others tried to weaponize her age, who very much wanted to keep this model that harmed women going. (They never banked on women growing backbones and saying “Nah to this”). She kept going anyway, and here we are, and she’s finally being taken seriously. Remember this when you are silenced and shamed for your own convictions that make society fearful of the status quo that does not … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/06/21 05:33 PM |
| 5 | Young Christian Slater (young because like most men, unfortunately he did not age like a fine wine, but oh..back then❣️)The sweetheart he was! That bone structure! 🥵 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/06/21 05:27 PM |
| 7 | Stats on how FDS is spreading compared to male tactics. They’ve been strategizing for 15 years, it’s our turn. 💪I was thinking about this and wanted to add on, knowing what works on people on social media: An aesthetic of happy, confident, attractive (but inclusive in that regard) women (both pics and vids), who have agency over their lives. Even libfems want that (I just think they don’t realize it’s possible)! I hear it in the voices of the podcast hosts, but people tend to respond to visual cues. Market to women of course. Smart men who want continued access to women will shape up at the sign of potent… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/06/21 04:45 AM |
| 1 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast is NOW ON YOUTUBE!!I can’t find the episode link so I am asking here- does Zoe Eileen have an IG? Fascinated by her work, want to recommend. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/06/21 04:35 AM |
| 40 | This is why I don't take ugly as an insult when scrotes get mad. We are so much more than how fuckable men find us.Incredibly beautiful. It’s 100% the hair. It’s defiant and visually represents these no fucks given, and men don’t like that. Now that the world is flatter and we don’t need male sexual interest to survive- which is all a lot of men have to offer- they find that a threat to their power, hence the extinction burst. A tantrum is easier than self-improvement. “You’re ugly” = “I feel my power being threatened.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/06/21 03:35 AM |
| 21 | Can we talk about this concept for a minute and why it should bother you as a woman?And what I always say is “No, no, no, a love language is an action that you would not desire to do with someone you dislike.” So, he may have sex with someone he dislikes, but would never engage in affectionate touch that isn’t a preamble to sex, with someone he dislikes. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/05/21 05:30 AM |
| 97 | Is Internet Misogyny Seeping Over IRL?Yes, yes it has. I see it too. You’re not crazy. And this is why it infuriates me when people tell me to “not worry about what you read on the internet”, as if the people saying the words are not largely living, breathing humans in the real world that one must interact with. As if what they read has 0 influence on how they behave offline. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/05/21 05:13 AM |
| 65 | I am not a fleshlightProud of you for having these standards at 17! Never doubt them, and I hope you can serve as a strong, intelligent, aware, and independent young woman for your peers, especially when they come to disappointed after buying into the narrative that women must be partnered to have value (no matter how poorly they are treated) and finding it does not serve them. You can set an example by living a rich life where you, not social norms, run the show. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/05/21 04:35 AM |
| 3 | I loved what Tracer Ellis Ross had to say about settling downKudos to moms of daughters here, I don’t know how you do it. I don’t know how I would instill in a girl that her worth does not hinge on impressing myself, or her father, or anyone else, based on our personal interests, nor does it hinge on her looks. It is based on finding what authentically speaks to her, and digging into that. Good looks are merely a tool, and do not speak to your actual character, which is the true foundation of the value she will bring to the world. Or that living a heteron… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/05/21 12:04 AM |
| 29 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 12 - How FDS Can Help Autistic Queens Navigate RelationshipsListening right now, at 22 minute mark and Omg I feel so seen. Can we please normalize some kind of structure to dating instead of it being a wishy washy free for all. It’s tough enough when that dynamic exists in our friendships. Is this fair weather? Are we on the way to mutual reliability? But in a romantic relationship (much like my professional relationships) I’m giving a lot more of myself. With dating, especially if I’m taking the risk on a sexual encounter. I need a framework in order to… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/21 03:23 PM |
| 30 | Interesting read 👩🏫I was surprised to see Florida on there, land of anything goes and all. Also, I think I’ve heard enough on “If the DSM doesn’t consider it an addiction....”, which I’ve heard used by libfems and their ilk re: sex addiction. Yeah, well, the APA isn’t always immediately on top of things; we know porn can be as addictive as gambling. What else do you call something that you feel compelled to do even when you don’t want to, that is having negative impacts, if not addiction? I think once compulsive v… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/21 02:28 AM |
| 26 | FDS & British Royal Mantra: 👑 Don’t Complain and Don’t Explain 👑I don’t know that I would go to the extreme that you are choosing to do, I’m maybe a few steps over on the spectrum (to be more discerning in terms of what and with who I share, and how much time I spend explaining....but not forgoing explaining entirely, to all people). But, that’s my choice and what works for me. Your choice is what works for you, and I don’t see that it would hurt anyone, so I would support it. You’re advocating for what works for you. If you were downvoted, it was probably b… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/21 02:14 AM |
| 40 | Sis, don't do it!Man to the right losing long-held benefits is like “Oh GodDAMMIT” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/21 03:20 AM |
| 15 | Straight from the horse's mouth: How LibFeminism "empowers" womenIt would be even more impactful if you had not only screenshots of comments, but also visuals from memes/dating profiles/text convos; etc., and audio clips (I can only hope for video clips, though I imagine those are tougher to come by), as hearing things actually said is even more impactful. A video presentation (I imagine you’d need some levity, or it would be too unbearable to watch) that’s about as fun as sitting in the dark playing audience to someone’s vacation slides (except these aren’t … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/05/21 03:58 AM |
| 28 | How does FDS inspire your OLD experience besides vetting and having a scrotation?I had a list like this. It ruled out every single person- hundreds of people over the course of years- that I matched with, aside from, I want to say, 4 that I can think of who had quality profiles. Issues cropped up in date 1 or 2. So I quit OLD. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/05/21 02:20 AM |
| 98 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 10 - Boomers, Coomers, & Consumers: What Went Wrong with Male SocializationI did love how the differences between libfem and radfem are explained. When you say you’re feminist, misogynists will assume you are libfem, because that is the feminism that benefits them, and they will jump to ThOuGhT yOu SaId YoU wAnTeD eQuAliTy. But I never wanted to be treated identically to men. Identical treatment will affect us differently due to our biological differences. What I’ve always wanted to see is women’s interests as well represented as those of men’s, reflected in our cultur… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/05/21 04:41 PM |
| 37 | It’s okay to let men failI’m so glad you posted this because I didn’t even know I was doing it. It’s embedded in my empathetic nature to not let damaged people in general to fail, if we are close. It makes me feel like I failed, when they fail, if I could have theoretically done more. But, in a way, if I lift someone up who is capable of, but never would do, the same for me....I fail myself, don’t I? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/05/21 02:07 AM |
| 16 | Anybody else feel re-traumatized and/or re-victimized over the way they're treated when they try to talk about their painful experiences with men?Aside from one male friend who is across the world and who is a unique case, I have ceased speaking to men about trauma, unless he is gay (and it’s not automatically every gay man at that). Based on consistent patterns that show up, I fully expect to be totally misunderstood and invalidated by straight men, until he has proven over a long period of time- at least a year- that he can be trusted with that pain. It is enough emotional bandwidth to attempt to discuss with men these issues from a bro… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/05/21 02:02 AM |
| 7 | Do not take that condom offIt’s true that they are tested regularly for STDs, at least in the US. That being said, it’s the “standard panel”, which does not include HSV2 (herpes, almost always the genital variety....why oh why this isn’t part of the standard battery, I have no idea, given its permanence and stigma). Moreover, these tests do not necessarily line up with the timing of the person’s sexual encounters. I don’t know the exact schedule, but it’s not like it’s every month. So, if they fuck raw, and then have sex … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/05/21 01:00 PM |
| 76 | Do not take that condom off“It’S oNlY fAiR” says the backtracking man who previously was moments away from being inside a woman, no questions asked. This anecdote makes me feel like I’m not crazy 🙏🏻 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/05/21 01:31 AM |
| 274 | Do not take that condom off“ShE sAiD sHe WaS cLeAn 🤷🏻♂️” Out of the literally hundreds of men who have expressed interest in sex with me, exactly one- one!- first asked about my STI status before proceeding. Exactly 0 asked for proof. You know, until I ask for theirs. Then suddenly like a toddler who had 0 interest in a toy until another child wants it, he does a 180 and all of a sudden my results really matter (which of course, are up to date and available on my phone in minutes). Not because he actually gave a shit abo… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/05/21 10:38 PM |
| 97 | Adulthood male circumcisionWow, gross. Thank you for inadvertently supporting me in my intermittent fasting goal this evening 😉 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/05/21 01:37 AM |
| 8 | What's Your Level Up Plan for this Week/Month?I am going to get up earlier, and commit to meditation sessions! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/21 01:41 AM |
| 49 | Men are the reason the True Crime genre exists.I can totally understand wanting to avoid true crime. But I actually like it a lot- though I have to take breaks- as it has really emboldened me to (as Crime Junkies puts it), Be Weird, Be Rude, and Stay Alive...not worry so much as to whether I will offend someone (statistically male) at the expense of my safety. To trust my instincts when something feels off and to insist on boundaries. So many of these tragic outcomes are preceded by a good ol’ dose of gaslighting. I feel more confidence in t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/21 01:32 AM |
| 39 | This has to be the funniest and most pathetic thing I've read.Well, I have a whisper too, I like men who either shut the fuck up and listen to what I have to say about feminism, or at least pay for everything and don’t push for sex. We all have our version of the Barbie Dream House! See? I can be unabashedly forward about what I like too and blithely unconcerned if I sound like a complete ass. And so can you, ladies who haven’t “hit the wall” yet! But seriously, there is literally a picture of a woman with duct tape over her mouth. Is this “I Have The Auda… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/21 01:24 AM |
| 525 | Reason #8265 why our female-only space must be protected at all costs. Women simply don’t say shit like this. Lurking men might say he’s just a troll, but the reality is that we can’t afford to not take violent threats seriously. And of course Reddit only gave him a temp ban.Women, they’re SO emotional! 🙄 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/21 01:17 AM |
| 25 | This is how women are silenced today - so afraid of being called "that lady" aka the K word that she's afraid to send an email to her kid's school!I’m really, really trying to not sound intolerant here but... I’m so sick of this Karen shit, at the expense of being able to speak up. The balancing act is exhausting. How bad does the offense have to be to call it out, to where you’re not the asshole for doing so? Just yesterday, I watched a man kick the door of a car that was not his, which dented it, and then storm down the avenue in a rage, knocking over every public trash can, spilling trash all into the bike lane. I almost called 911 beca… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/05/21 12:20 AM |
| 11 | Dick does nothing for me.I like posts like this, because while I (usually) do like penetration, there are other things I don’t like to do that are considered part of the standard sexual “roster”, so to speak (and things that are not on that list, that I do like), and it makes me feel seen. I’m not sure when I’ll have sex again, as it really has to be someone not only worth the risk, but who also has a sense of female disproportionate risk, and appreciates that risk (very few men do, and a lot of women aren’t even cogniz… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/05/21 02:29 PM |
| 20 | The RaTiOnaL SexThat’s what I was thinking except the opposite- marketing the vaccine as having a side effect of longer lasting erections, and penile growth. Surely there must be a way to sexualize that sexy sexy vaccine. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/04/21 01:41 AM |
| 40 | Men really do know and they’re much more socially adept than they let onOh yes. I’ve said this before. I had a roommate who couldn’t manage to find toilet paper to buy, or remember when rent was due, but he had 0 difficulties with looking for, identifying, and honing in on things I was most sensitive about....to have in the arsenal for a later argument as a dig, just to turn that knife a little bit and feel empowered over being a manipulative scumbag. The attempt was SO obvious. Still, that shit took forethought. If you can observe, mentally calculate that, and plan… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/21 03:31 AM |
| 7 | This OLD bio made me puke in my mouth 🤡, men are getting delusional.Yeeeaaahhh I saw that too. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/21 03:22 AM |
| 53 | This OLD bio made me puke in my mouth 🤡, men are getting delusional.How freeing it must feel to blithely walk through life, never stopping for a second to wonder if you sound like an abject fool. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/21 03:21 AM |
| 28 | What are your experiences dating neurodivergent men?Have you ever watched Love on the Spectrum? Granted these are more extreme cases, but in any event I think it just varies in terms of personality. Some of the guys kind of sucked, but a couple were super sweet and while they struggled with things, the men had good fathers who set positive examples, and the guys were really trying to do the right thing...and some of the women they were going out with (also autistic) could be pretty darn challenging. One guy on the show, my God he had a tough time… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/21 03:14 AM |
| 154 | AskFeminists: “We do not allow FDS users to participate here. “ Explain like I’m 5?It’s true. The main feminists board as well. Being FDS will have you banned within seconds of a comment. No matter that what “being on FDS” means is that you support a sub advocating for women’s interests...albeit in a way that means certain types of men will not benefit. But since when did male interests need to be prioritized, in a movement for women? It makes no sense, and it’s infuriating that a movement meant to be for women has been hijacked in the context of Reddit. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/04/21 01:39 PM |
| 22 | Instead of going on walk dates, buy yourself a trash grabber so that you can pick up trash in a way that at least benefits your local communityI know this is a serious post and I really appreciate it! But I cannot erase the image of me walking through the park passing by catcalling NVM, poking them with my grabber and attempting to usher them into the bag. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/04/21 04:18 AM |
| 5 | What love song do you dedicate to yourself?Mine is “Rise Up” by Andra Day. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/04/21 04:12 AM |
| 2 | What Is FDS position on Matchmakers?I mean, I’d love to think so, but the offers/language/etc. I see women still continuing to accept on apps makes me doubtful. Speaking of that, would such an app also require vetting of women looking to join and/or strict enforcement of standards the guys are held to, to ensure that a crowd of PM’s doesn’t “lower the bar” with their interactions? Too many men will do the least to get the most, if they can. I know the mods get a lot of flack from women who do not agree with our mindset at all, but… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/04/21 03:58 PM |
| 7 | What Is FDS position on Matchmakers?I think they’ll go for HVW, when they have their eyes set on value. But as far as OLD goes, while some are better than others on OLD, I think the pool would be quite small for something that demanded high effort from men, as it seems men have been mentally conditioned to the idea that the whole point of OLD is that is this a low effort avenue to meet women (which of course, doesn’t work for most of them, but that doesn’t stop anyone from trying to make a quick buck via a casino, where odds are y… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/04/21 01:08 PM |
| 5 | FDS PODCAST UPDATE: we're going to start doing interviews!Tarana Burke! She started metoo. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/04/21 03:27 AM |
| 45 | This image circulating Reddit made me peak and go full FDS.I really, really want this to be true. It’s so depressing, how I see men act here. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/04/21 03:11 AM |
| 19 | What Is FDS position on Matchmakers?Why would men sign up though, when there are lower effort platforms available filled with desperate women? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/04/21 03:08 AM |
| 9 | Seriously, what IS IT with the 20 something girls?! No need for “freaking out” or being scared and “terrified” you'll “never find love”. Those types of posts make me fear for the next generations...I’m not surprised by this at all. It’s the norm to think a partner is needed to check off the box. I know women in their 60s who think this way. It’s a notion passed down for thousands of years. I’m actually surprised (and relieved) when women in their 20s are woken up to the fact that they don’t need to be paired. That feels like making history. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/04/21 07:43 PM |
| 2 | Context: the boyfriend has sex with other women for OnlyFans and promotes it on TikTok. The girlfriend says she is “happy”. Comments are saying “y’all mad you get cheated on for free while they’re in a healthy relationship with boundaries, trust, and more money than you” 🤦♀️I don’t concern myself with women like this, beyond saying that if she changes her mind, to feel free to reach out (and perhaps leave a comment for the lurkers, just to let them know that it’s ok to not be happy with said arrangement). Maybe she’s happy with it for reasons I don’t understand, maybe she’s not. When I try to help someone who very much does not want that help, it eats up too much of my emotional bandwidth. There are enough women for me to work with who have seen the light, and trul… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/04/21 07:39 PM |
| 7 | I don't defend men or their plights on social media at allI’m sorry, who owns PornHub? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/04/21 04:50 AM |
| 42 | Why are you ring to date a homeless man though?I was about to say. Like JFC foster a child in need. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/04/21 04:35 AM |
| 207 | I always wondered why the rest of reddit demonized this subredditWell, yes. That’s how it goes. I used to work in my uni’s cafeteria, and it was customary for the guys who worked the loading dock to steal shit. I don’t mean a can of soda, I mean 3,4 cases of drinks, whole packages of meat, etc. New site manager came along, and put the kibash on it. The guys were real mad! They’d always done things this way! And they jumped through a dozen mental hoops to justify why that manager was in the wrong. People don’t like when you dam the path of least resistance. Ev… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/21 06:47 PM |
| 20 | Applied for a new jobGood luck. And hold your head high so your 👑 doesn’t fall off. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/21 06:28 PM |
| 15 | Comments under the original post filled with "It'S JuST a SiLLy JoKe!" but is it really?l don’t buy “just a joke/meme”, as if they’re harmless and have 0 influence. Why the f do we think political cartoons exist? Humor is a powerful tool containing a grain of truth that can serve to perpetuate a narrative or normalize a behavior. I ask “What is the motive for the joke? What personal truth would move someone to laugh at the joke?” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/21 05:21 PM |
| 14 | So fUnNy sO cUtE“AHAHAHAHA I don’t really know how to deal with this 😭” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/21 05:13 PM |
| 3 | From the dating subreddit, "Men shouldn't be expected to carry the entire weight of the dating experience, and women shouldn't be afraid to scare men away by "chasing" them and providing support."If this becomes official FDS material, in the casual sex benefits part, be sure to add that men do not suffer from the involuntary hormonal bonding that we do, and can much more easily remain detached! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/21 02:32 AM |
| 3 | Self-aware LVM notices more young women are buying houses 💅 keep it up ladiesI always love an uplifting tale of a HVM! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/04/21 01:41 PM |
| 3 | Daily reminder - other women's spaces on the internet are not necessarily your friend.Inform women of emotional labor, that it is a real thing women don’t even realize they do, it has value in society, and you should not donate that currency to places where you’ll receive no gratitude (or anything of value) in return. And no, a quick fix of being in the right does not count- much like gambling at a fixed table, this win is immediately depleted when the vendor continues to hustle you out of more while continuing to give nothing. I often give more leeway in the scenario of speaking… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/04/21 01:49 AM |
| 40 | The feeling when he asks for anal... 😂My experience is one where I get to experience that feeling of power that comes with being the penetrator. I did feel like an aggressor (consensually!). No other configuration thus far has quite recreated that feeling of being in control of the sexual situation. Must be nice to be able to take that for granted. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/04/21 01:42 AM |
| 212 | If you have to snap a picture of a guy, contact Deux Moi, and ask them to conduct an international search on a dude that checked you out but didn’t ask you out, then he’s just not that into you. 🤦🏾♀️Interest was communicated. Men move mountains for what they want. If he wanted to, he would. ETA: Thank you for the silver! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/04/21 01:34 AM |
| 50 | This is just sadOh my heart. This poor woman. Women who think they need their “forever”, they’re in for a long, hard road. Either by the pain of being alone or the pain of accepting poor treatment. I suppose I’m in the minority here, in that I do believe most men (enough to go around for women who are equally committed to being high value, anyway) can collectively improve as partners if women collectively demand it (as I’ve seen done via pressures on our legislature, as a union member putting the heat on manage… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/04/21 06:48 PM |
| 251 | Self-aware LVM notices more young women are buying houses 💅 keep it up ladiesThese are some real mental gymnastics, to assign the decline of men on women’s success. Always looking for excuses for hating us! Porn (which isn’t “chasing” women, it’s “consuming” them) and gaming- and the greed of more powerful men- totally left out. An aside, I thought you could make good money in a trade, if college/office jobs aren’t for you, because they’re often union jobs, you can move up into management, and if you’re smart and work hard enough, open your own business. Do I have that w… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/04/21 06:19 PM |
| 33 | I have to laugh at this, but I worry for the PickMes who will fear that their value might decrease (hint: it won’t).I, too, will have money that increases. Both our looks will fade, likely yours moreso than mine, as you can see from older men and women compared side by side. You’ll be far more desperate for a partner when you’re older than I will be- you’ll allow yourself to be used for your money and drain it on someone who will eventually leave you for someone actually attractive and kind- allowing me to be more selective, spending my money on those who will appreciate it. Plus, having terrible character ne… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/04/21 03:14 PM |
| 10 | Oh dear god...Sigh. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/04/21 02:35 AM |
| 41 | jfc, even the comments are a goldmine, so it’s wrong to have standards???Geez all this guy needs to do is state what he’s looking for straight out the gate; I hear women all the time being open to this kind of scenario. Also, it’s another case to abandon coffee dates. If you don’t want it to feel like an interview, nay on the coffee dates! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/04/21 02:31 AM |
| 73 | **NEW VARIATION** Coffee / Walk date 🙄These guys can’t possibly want to be in the type of relationship where they’re putting in equal effort. I don’t think most men want that, if only because- while I haven’t encountered this “wfh” specifically- I see how men move mountains to get other things they want, and I’m seeing this low effort thing in dating as quite common. Perhaps they step up for women who they’re truly gaga for, but that only tends to happen, not from a random dating profile, but when they’ve gotten to know her in a pla… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/04/21 03:06 AM |
| 86 | Men are cry babiesWhen men like this stand up to other men who body shame, we can talk about my empathy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 08:20 PM |
| 9 | Poor women, who gon tell ‘em?the first one. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/04/21 11:12 PM |
| 11 | Poor women, who gon tell ‘em?It really is getting better over there. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/04/21 11:09 PM |
| 25 | Shower thought: Liberal feminists are the gender equivalent of the racist folks who claim to be "colorblind" to race.This! And the other go-to tactic, to remind us that in same sex relationships, this is how it works. But an opposite sex relationship is not a same sex one, the power dynamic is not the same. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/04/21 02:49 AM |
| 14 | Online dating strategies (research and warding off LVM)My online dating strategy involved deleting my apps. This was after changing it to demisexuals only on OKC, and getting maybe 4 men (all pretty good looking, with thoughtfully written profiles) popping up in a 20 mile radius, who undoubtedly are flooded with DMs. My genuine best wishes to the ladies who landed them 😊 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/04/21 03:55 PM |
| 33 | What's their motivation for hating women so much?I know people like to shit on Wikipedia but I was curious about what it had to say on misogyny and honestly, it taught me so much- the root of fear due to the power women have (the sexual drive towards them, plus people won’t exist without them), the praise of women who are see as “good” (submissive) and the punishment of women who are seen as “bad” (vocal about oppression), and the “patriarchal bargain”, which was a deal more powerful men struck up with less powerful men essentially saying that… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/04/21 03:49 PM |
| 29 | The advice on dating subs will have you down bad. Reserved guys ask women out too. It’s actually even more obvious when they’re into someone.This is me hoping a LARPing man wrote this. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/04/21 03:44 PM |
| 19 | Why claiming “Misandry” and “not all men” is dangerous and ignores the truth about men.It’s to derail. And I honestly don’t get why slightly better men say nothing when this derailing occurs. We see it constantly, they’ve got to be too. It’s just causing more and more women to close up shop on getting close with men, limiting access to what we offer. It’s so frequent, we have to, as we just don’t know where it’s going to come from next. You’d think other men would get wise to this and tell vocal misogynists to cut the shit, it’s stepping on their sexual opportunities. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/04/21 03:41 PM |
| 21 | People who say "redpillers and pickup artists are only a tiny percentage of the population, most men aren't like that"I would love to know what that space is, so I can recommend it. I do in fact wonder if more would be happier with that lifestyle than they realize. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/04/21 03:14 AM |
| 26 | So um, is sex with a guy who has a small D painful for anyone else here or that's just me?Maybe he had a curve or a lean that didn’t work for you? For my shape, I’ve found certain ones that lean or curve too much to the side and aren’t girthy (if it’s girthy the shortness isn’t an issue) do feel stabby. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/04/21 02:51 AM |
| 1 | FDS Is Not Radical“That kind of personal connection”, meaning “one with an FDS woman” not “dating in general”. JFC with the misinterpretations (that are clearly all my fault, not yours, faultless one). Anyway, there’s no more clearly explaining to you, one cannot receive information if they’re not only feeling very defensive but also see the messenger as beneath them so, all I can say is, though you will staunchly retain your beliefs, I wouldn’t waste too much energy actually concerning yourself with what FDS doe… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/04/21 04:49 AM |
| 1 | FDS Is Not RadicalI mean, I explained that so much of what you find distasteful- tasing and fighting back is another example of exhaustion from misogyny...it’s about protecting female bodies that are assaulted so commonly, it’s become the norm (“if, then”...ie IF you do that, THEN I do this....but no one is physically coming after men to gain power). You twisted the context, leaving out the self-defense aspect, because of course. I get it. You no like it. There isn’t a thing I could say that would change your min… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/04/21 04:23 AM |
| 1 | FDS Is Not Radical“Hates men”. Omg this is so tiring. No desire to hurt, maim, rape, trick, or murder men. If you’re a dick swinging hot shot, go after the men people who actually want to do these things to other people, stop going after what you perceive to be easy targets. It’s lazy. Certain behaviors I do intensely dislike in men. I would not pursue them. Yes. In real life. Expectations are clearly communicated. Not worded in the crass way that fits your bias, but it’s clear what is expected. If you don’t like… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/04/21 03:38 AM |
| 2 | FDS Is Not Radical“You women”? It seems you don’t like us much so I hope you’re not pursuing sex with that which you don’t much like. Anyway. That one is easy. The difference is, trickery. Manipulation. Dangling a relationship with no intention to have one. Not wearing TRP openly and making it crystal clear “spinning plates until they break” is exactly what they’re doing. Tell me this is what you intend for me, now I’m informed and walking. FDS is upfront about standards, so no one’s time is wasted. By “getting” … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/04/21 01:20 AM |
| 2 | FDS Is Not RadicalI rarely encounter men who have this level of understanding of FDS. I see some sections where you don’t have it quite right, but you have enough right for me to not pick apart this analysis. I will clarify that a lot of the “bitchy” content is not meant for men (the sub would be private but that prevents visibility from women to join), and it’s a release valve of the pressure from the near constant LVM behavior (and if that’s not you, then she doesn’t mean you)- not just in dating, but in our fa… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/03/21 07:20 PM |
| 6 | FDS Is Not RadicalHuh. Well, FDS sure gets discussed a lot on this sub and a lot of energy put into dissecting it, for it being no bother. By “attract” I don’t mean “types” or “professions”, I mean folks who are not good to date. We both have attracted a fair share of narcissists, addicts and codependents, I’m sure; if we did not date them, it’s because we said “no” to them when the trait was discovered. It’s about what you allow. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/03/21 04:40 AM |
| 10 | FDS Is Not Radical“Good men” to you. In the FDS mind, a man unaccepting of the principles is not one good for her. Don’t like the principles? Then you’re not for each other. I don’t know why men are so bothered by FDS. They aren’t trying to trick men into sex or romance. It’s all out there. Just don’t date them and you’re fine. And the only defense men have left is “But...then you’ll NeVeR gEt A mAn!” What just doesn’t seem to come across is that women are taught they need a man, but when it comes down to brass t… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/03/21 03:44 AM |
| 53 | Why sex positivity always harms women and why I'll never accept it.You know what I wish? If these men truly have these desires to hurt and destroy deep down that they perhaps wish they didn’t have and can’t control, that we could normalize like minded men just doing these things to each other. No, it’s not a woman, but human beings are creative, and I’m sure they could figure out a way to recreate the power dynamic they crave (which is what it’s really about- power). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/03/21 08:08 PM |
| 5 | Conservative Pick Me Magazine Evie thinks we’re all Femcels Y’all. I wonder which man dictated this idea for them to write down? Lmaooo, imagine being this desperate for male approval in 2021.“Given nothing”? What on earth? We literally have a sister sub specifically about leveling up. It’s just that it gets ignored by press because it doesn’t require that men- who run things, like this publication- either reflect on their behaviors (or lose out), like FDS does. Also I am so burnt out on this narrative that one’s value is inherently tied to being picked. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/03/21 12:21 AM |
| 17 | Male SocializationThis also has me wondering about women. I’m not saying women can’t be independently violent. I know they can. But what I wonder is what percentage were going along with a man’s agenda, when violent (given that we are socialized to want to be “picked”), and/or grew up surrounded by violent adults. Vs. what percentage were just violent despite a good upbringing, and in those cases, if there were unusual amounts of testosterone? Because I’ve known aggressive women from good families and I was alway… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/03/21 06:45 PM |
| 26 | “Looking for a woman who can keep up”Even in the best case scenario- i.e. “I’m active and I challenge myself physically and would like to be with someone who will do those activities along side me” (which is what I want), “keep up” is a really arrogant way to put things. No one can likely 100% keep up with someone else- someone is going to be the better yogi, someone is going to be more proactive when it comes to travel plans/social plan coordination, someone is more efficient in the kitchen, etc. etc., the point is you both fuckin… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/03/21 04:42 PM |
| 116 | Human penises are shrinking because of pollution, warns scientist. Dr Swan believes that the rapidly decreasing fertility rate means that most men will be unable to produce viable sperm by 2045. These chemicals have long been known to cause infertility in women (PCOS), but men affected makes news.Holy shit. I have never heard of phthalates and this is really disturbing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/03/21 03:31 AM |
| 26 | For those who deleted dating apps, how did you get over the fear of missing out?weren’t interested in me as a person at all; they just wanted low-effort sex. This resonates and is very much my experience. I’ll add this- it’s really hard to find a good relationship on an app. I don’t think it’s any easier to use an app than to find someone in real life. So what if women (interested in men, I do still see value in them when seeking women) just collectively quit? And there were no more real women to have access to? It would seem to be almost like a public service. Men would re… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/03/21 02:10 AM |
| 4 | Ok, is anyone else tired of how people are pushing the idea of open relationships today?Non-conforming here, but in theory I’m ok with polyamory, as long as all parties are happy. I’m not sure it would be for me, as when I am in a relationship, I find that to be more than enough emotional labor- I am generous but do have a limited bandwidth (I also cultivate numerous friendships, some of which overlap in my professional life)- and I do not want my primary partner to be shortchanged. Theoretically I may as a single person, but when I have pursued this in the past, the mistake I made… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/03/21 01:54 AM |
| 49 | Answer to WAP - Let's write our own anthems!I’m in the back like 🎶he does chores in this house, he does chores in this house🎶 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/21 07:10 AM |
| 14 | Both of these are very straight to the point :)I immediately thought of feminism as well, and how a man- in the wake of the Sarah Everard movement- said that if women kept speaking so hatefully, it was going to make him “hate them”. I said, I know some women can say some terrible things about men as a monolith; to be honest, I don’t much like it and do address it. I explained it’s because they’re angry right now that there aren’t enough male allies. Most know good men exist. Most don’t literally mean all men (and most are more angry about a … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/21 06:57 AM |
| 8 | The FDS podcast is now LIVE!!! Weekly Discussion Thread: Episode 1My favorite line was along the lines of how these experiences seem unique to oneself (I have especially found this to be true along the lines of sharing my experiences with men- and even women who have either been partnered for a long time, or now have amnesia as they finally got picked by someone who luckily isn’t an asshole- and having those experiences invalidated with the implication that it’s something I’m choosing/attracting), and then you get to talking to other women and it’s like, oh, t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/21 06:14 AM |
| 8 | "YoU'rE sO JaDeD!!" and "nOt aLl MeN" are not valid retorts for women setting boundaries.Don’t forget “bitter”! A critically thinking and aware woman is “bitter” because she no longer tastes good to that kind of man. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/03/21 01:04 AM |
| 4 | How to make the first move, but not reallyParagraph 5 is so good I’ve saved this post 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/03/21 12:56 AM |
| 6 | Jesus christ this man is a piece of workImagine having the confidence to type that out and hit enter. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/03/21 12:50 AM |
| 20 | 💯% true for me.For all the comments describing negative experiences with gay men, I mean, no demographic is a monolith. I’ve been groped more times by women I did not know than I have by gay men, with the “we’re both girls” excuse. I will say that any groping I’ve experienced by gay men or women has been in a party setting, with alcohol involved. You’re in that setting and as a woman, you pretty much have to be vigilant with all strangers. At the end of the day, there’s no perfectly safe group, but on the whol… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/03/21 12:46 AM |
| 7 | Men love to remind women that they can physically dominate us because they are bigger and stronger than us. That's why I think women shouldn't be afraid of gaining muscle and having a little extra body fat, so we have more mass to throw around in self defence.On this specific issue, yes. My therapist tied in the usual tropes- the business about body positivity, etc. etc. But I couldn’t tie in why I feel less comfortable in a smaller body. This post clicked in that it was validating for me in terms of the usefulness of a larger, stronger body, which is far more valuable to me than being small and attractive. My therapist isn’t a radfem, so she doesn’t see these things through that lens of a stronger body serving as protection, and this would have only… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/03/21 03:23 AM |
| 12 | In the UK, carrying Pepper spray has a max 10 year prison sentence. So if you get caught using it on an attacker, you lose 10 years of your life as opposed to all of them.Hey, I gave a lot of thought on a personal safety device due to my night running/walks, and I went with an alarm with LED flashing light for a number of reasons. Inexpensive, small, can be worn around neck, no subscription fee, does not require cell service in case I am in a remote area/my phone is taken, it’s loud and bright, figured it would distract the attacker enough to where I’d have time to either kick him in the balls or just run if he doesn’t have a hold on me (I have pretty good speed)… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/03/21 02:57 AM |
| 18 | Boy moms and their pickmeisha tendencies?I’m glad someone said this, because “blaming mom” when we see LV adult male behavior is never well received here. And while it isn’t always the cause of an LVM, I have literally witnessed myself, the growing up of boys, from infancy to their mid-20s, whose mothers kowtowed to them all through their youth, allowing them to be rude AF, and now they are room emptying assholes who expect to be catered to, just as their mothers did for them. And these were moms that were educated, not in bad marriage… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/03/21 01:52 AM |
| 22 | Men love to remind women that they can physically dominate us because they are bigger and stronger than us. That's why I think women shouldn't be afraid of gaining muscle and having a little extra body fat, so we have more mass to throw around in self defence.Thanks for this post. It’s actually changed my relationship with my body in a way that a therapist has not been able to in 5 sessions. It has the feminist and toxic masculinity realities attached to it that I needed. I’ll never be tall, but there is so much practicality to a stronger, bulkier body, and to me that’s more important than what is sexually pleasing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/03/21 01:41 AM |
| 36 | Dinks on a threadWhy do they do this? We’re easier, softer targets? Nothing can match a man that’s bigger, scarier and meaner than them? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/03/21 12:59 AM |
| 5 | Ladies, take note of the men around you who are saying "not all men". They are promoting a pro-femicide agenda. Don't have sex with them, don't give them your attention, and don't patron their businesses #BoycottNAMALTThis makes such a good point....how, without me explicitly stating it, men are SO good at noticing an insecurity or weak spot of mine, and not only that, they remember it (and they know the perfect time to use it in an argument). That’s some good on-the-fly detective work. So, if I’m uncomfortable with something? They fucking know. They push because what they want is more important to them than whether it’s wanted. Same goes with how they pretend to not know to do household things or remember an… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/03/21 12:47 AM |
| 22 | Michael B. Jordan Shows Lori Harvey What A PREPARED Man Looks LikeMy favorite line there is that “When a man really wants something, he comes prepared”. So true! I’ll add to that, even more so when it’s something he doesn’t feel certain he can have, unless he puts in the work. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/03/21 03:34 AM |
| 86 | Ladies, take note of the men around you who are saying "not all men". They are promoting a pro-femicide agenda. Don't have sex with them, don't give them your attention, and don't patron their businesses #BoycottNAMALTOh man. I’ve heard all of those. What’s interesting is that I have come to the defense of men and boys abused by women (not by virtue of them being male, by the way...these women were equally horrible to plenty of people, regardless of gender). Personally. A number of times. At the risk of social consequences to myself. I have lost friendships, and been called names, over not being “chill”. I continue to assist men less privileged- from an intersectionality standpoint- than me, with respect to w… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/21 11:14 PM |
| 5 | A clown in his natural habitatAdded to the list called Don’t Touch That Penis, Ladies! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/21 09:37 PM |
| 15 | How the 90s Became the Era When Women Started Leveling DownI remember feeling so disappointed when I felt that late 90s shift! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/21 09:10 PM |
| 365 | Ladies, take note of the men around you who are saying "not all men". They are promoting a pro-femicide agenda. Don't have sex with them, don't give them your attention, and don't patron their businesses #BoycottNAMALTImagine if a quarter of that effort spent on being defensive over how women react was directed towards the men who are the root cause. Anyway, I’ll add them to the growing list called #Don’tTouchThatPenis! They’re welcome to paint themselves into that celibacy corner. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/21 09:00 PM |
| 12 | 🔥🔥The Female Dating Strategy podcast teaser is now live on Spotify! Check it out! 🔥🔥I specifically was looking for a post that announced this- I saw on IG. I’m really excited about it getting going and have subscribed. I’ll encourage friends to as well, because there are a lot of misconceptions (primarily driven by defensive men- if it doesn’t apply to you then we don’t mean you bro! But...are you sure it doesn’t apply?) and I think the audio helps “humanize” FDS a bit and make it more digestible; perhaps new followers will result. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/03/21 03:21 AM |
| 28 | 5 lies about FDS in Vice's latest hit pieceAny chance this will get pinned to the top? It lays out the philosophy (in the context of the misinterpretations of it) so well, that a child could understand it (and anyone who pretends not to understand is simply just using that as a cover for being angry about not hearing what they would like to). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/03/21 06:38 AM |
| 10 | What Dominique Sisley (Vice) said she was writing about FDS vs. what she actually wroteWow, what a manipulative bitch. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/03/21 06:20 AM |
| 0 | I know this seems like an impossible task, but.... can we attempt to make a truce with the feminists subreddits?Separately, do you find the above comment to be hateful? | /r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates | 10/03/21 07:14 AM |
| -1 | I know this seems like an impossible task, but.... can we attempt to make a truce with the feminists subreddits?Not to fight, but to clarify- This is an incredibly common response. I can’t expect upvotes from this crew, but for you personally, I don’t know that it will help any but for what it’s worth: Much how you disagree with some men here, FDS is not a user monolith. I can understand how some posts could be triggering. But ultimately, the goal is not to hurt, physically/sexually assault, kill, objectify, or con a man into sex. The goal is to not be hurt, assaulted, killed, objectified, deceived, or st… | /r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates | 10/03/21 04:55 AM |
| -1 | I know this seems like an impossible task, but.... can we attempt to make a truce with the feminists subreddits?Based on the numerous attempts mentioned in this thread re: men speaking on feminist boards without concerning themselves if they are welcome, hopefully it’s ok that I in turn am here. I understand there are male separatist spaces and I am ok with not being there, but given the nature of this post, I take it this is not one. I don’t know how there could be a meeting of the minds, right now. When I make feminist points, it is generally not met with understanding by men. I watched a thread here wi… | /r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates | 09/03/21 05:05 PM |
| 3 | Can you ladies imagine this?I think unfortunately you’d still see some toxicity, as patriarchy is embedded in many women as well, who would then embody toxic masculinity and assume this stance of needing dominance, etc. You’d still need serious re-education to eradicate internal misogyny and these values that so many women still think we need as a society to function, and demonstrate how we can exist healthily without that value system that emphasizes serious power imbalances. So for me it’s more about the frame of mind, t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/03/21 06:34 AM |
| 21 | Is it only fair to blame the sex works ?Men created and own Pornhub. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/03/21 06:19 AM |
| 26 | I wonder if he texted her back yetI don’t have the emotional bandwidth to get into it with anyone, but I hope the mods won’t be too quick to delete the “casual is ok” comments in this thread. In general I am against it due to the risk level stemming from natural power dynamics- it is not a thing I would do until the man had both demonstrated true friendship to/investment in me over the course of time (to where any hurt to me would result in serious social consequences to him), and I had some knowledge of how he treats women that… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/03/21 06:15 AM |
| 10 | Question about men on reddit, are they particularly low value, porn sick and sexist or they represents the general male population in the west?Yeah that detail always slips my mind. It’s like this era that I am subconsciously trying to forget, but I know its impact is important to be cognizant of. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/03/21 10:56 PM |
| 100 | I love it when men recognise LVM!I’m with you. Which means I basically do not date at all. I guess the upside of the lack of romance is that I have redirected that energy, and deepened my work in helping those who need it- women suffering from patriarchal oppression, young men receptive to leveling up (I say young because men over 35 in my experience typically have their minds made up), neglected animals, people with disabilities, etc.- which is the replacement for the psychological side of it, and I’ve become super active (as … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/03/21 10:54 PM |
| 84 | Question about men on reddit, are they particularly low value, porn sick and sexist or they represents the general male population in the west?This! That’s the problem. I used to feel ok, thinking, “Oh, it’s just losers online. Can’t touch me.” Imagine my shock when someone I was starting to become friends with pulled some bullshit about how male sexual obsession is a good thing because without it we would not have populated the earth. WHUT? And his friend who seemed cool at first, asserted he would not be a pro-feminist ally. The second man has a very nice girlfriend, which makes it all the more horrifying, thinking a woman has to twi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/03/21 10:47 PM |
| 51 | Before You Want to be “An Elegant Lady”, Think Twice (Be yourself and keep raising your voice ladies!)This comment is everything. And my favorite from the article was “Most troublingly, “elegance” doesn’t let women be loud, be large, get angry, and fight back.” I don’t mind looking the part, because I like the aesthetic. But I’m certainly not acting it. It’s empowering to appear to be the elegant lady, then throw a scrote for a loop and run roughshod over one attempting to silence me, make me shrink, and to stop self-advocating. Because “men are visual”, I actually find I can make more of an imp… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/03/21 10:18 PM |
| 444 | I love it when men recognise LVM!The whole idea of MeN aRe ViSuAl is so exhausting in general, when a lot of the men who are reaching out to me on OLD just look terrible. I don’t mean things that can’t be helped or take time fixing- I’m talking about beards you could hide small animals in, stained teeth from too much smoking, no thought to what they wear, no shape to the haircut, no interest in active dates or even doing anything active on their own time, and I can’t even imagine what their feet look like. There are men that do… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/03/21 10:08 PM |
| 2 | The backlash that FDS gets, both on and off Reddit, proves that society is committed to keeping women in unsatisfactory relationships to the benefit of menGreat analogy. And I think what freaks them out the most is not just some woman or other quitting...but that workplace unionizing, so other women are also encouraged to strike, when negotiations break down. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/03/21 05:52 AM |
| 28 | Seen this a few hours ago and couldn’t resist sharing with you ladiesI know she’s just making an assertion but I promise you that type is never going to therapy. Even the guys who don’t actually feel that way, but see a video like this and get their NotAllMen hackles up won’t go to therapy. Sometimes I’m just like, I give up. They can’t be reached. Let them die out- peepee’s untouched, God willing- maybe the next generation of men can be better. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/03/21 05:27 AM |
| 127 | 50-50 is a lie.0% interested in child rearing or being supportive of the mom carrying the baby, 100% will fight for custody because pride and MuH lEgAcY. This is why I believe feminist literature should be required reading in childhood, so this shit doesn’t happen in the first place. I guarantee you some exasperated female coworker, family member, or friend of hers is doing an inordinate amount of emotional labor surrounding this. And yes we do have to support each other but also, being constantly adjacent to … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/02/21 04:08 AM |
| 1 | As the average American woman is 171lbs @ 5ft4 is wanting a slim girlfriend under 140lbs now considered "high standards?"Right. And the Earth is flat. Because there was a time when lots of people said it, so that makes it true. And whatever else you say. Go to the handbook for the section “a high value woman”. You are not a stupid man and are entirely capable of this. I don’t see you benefitting here in any meaningful way, if you aren’t receptive to learning at this time. Being fed chips is perhaps satisfying to you in the moment, but it means you’ll just put off a real meal. That’s not of benefit to you. I’ll kee… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/02/21 06:32 AM |
| 1 | As the average American woman is 171lbs @ 5ft4 is wanting a slim girlfriend under 140lbs now considered "high standards?"I vet with people in life. I don’t need to creep around a Redditor’s history. That’s a pretty weird guy-in-his-basement thing to do. And I mean yes, there’s plenty on self-improvement, you just overlooked it, because it doesn’t confirm your bias. There is plenty praising of good men- there is literally a flair for it, which you don’t see- and I could send links but you’d ignore them, because they don’t confirm your bias. And no, we don’t aim to collect men or overpower them a la Red Pill, or sex… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/02/21 05:54 AM |
| 1 | As the average American woman is 171lbs @ 5ft4 is wanting a slim girlfriend under 140lbs now considered "high standards?"Well. Someone did a little digging didn’t he. (It’s just still so fucking weird to me that men do this). However, it’s moot, as the only perspective you have on FDS is confirmation bias. Also the only perspective on the shape of Earth that flat earthers have is their confirmation bias. Bias is not the thing that makes things so. FDS loves good men. We praise them! In fact lil’ sleuth, I recently praised some great ones (because of course you leave that out, it wouldn’t support the bias). What FD… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/02/21 04:14 AM |
| 1 | Since you joined FDS, what are the ‘pink-flags’ or little LVM behavior you started picking up on that you didn’t notice before or would let slide?social media | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/02/21 02:28 PM |
| 1 | As the average American woman is 171lbs @ 5ft4 is wanting a slim girlfriend under 140lbs now considered "high standards?"Your comment isn’t terribly convincing, and it certainly wouldn’t be terribly convincing to any women you wanted to persuade to be in your company. And where did I say I hate men? It’s an article about the likelihood of a man actually sticking around in times of sickness. Assumptions about hating men in response to presenting research wouldn’t be terribly attractive to women you’re trying to persuade to be in your company either. I do hope you are as frank in person, so she knows exactly what sh… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/02/21 02:12 PM |
| -1 | As the average American woman is 171lbs @ 5ft4 is wanting a slim girlfriend under 140lbs now considered "high standards?"Amen, 100%! I’m assuming you’re sticking to your own gender as well! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/02/21 05:09 AM |
| 2 | As the average American woman is 171lbs @ 5ft4 is wanting a slim girlfriend under 140lbs now considered "high standards?"Why bother with the trouble of a husband if hard times look like this? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/02/21 03:34 AM |
| 2 | As the average American woman is 171lbs @ 5ft4 is wanting a slim girlfriend under 140lbs now considered "high standards?"We most certainly cannot “get away with it”. On Reddit and IG there are oodles of comments made by angry men about the height thing. And if you bring it up on an app that brings angry messages as well. So it’s best left unsaid. Framing yourself as a victim with a disproportionately lower amount of power just to “get in on the action” is not a good time, you are left open to mockery. I’d only assign yourself the status in scenarios where it’s applicable. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/02/21 03:23 AM |
| 24 | Since you joined FDS, what are the ‘pink-flags’ or little LVM behavior you started picking up on that you didn’t notice before or would let slide?When they knew me as a friend, they knew me well, they got to know me as a human, acquainted with all of my wonderful qualities, knew I was single, and never much bothered with me aside from polite conversation in group gatherings. But the second I post something on IG where I happen to look hot (not trying to look hot, just my hobby happens to be hot to a lot of men, and no it’s not a shared interest) and it’s noticeable I lost some weight, all of a sudden I have worth as a person and you’re hi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/02/21 03:16 AM |
| 17 | Man speaking out against victim blaming in the Manson case.I’n telling you! Feeling seen, valued and allied with reaches me in a way that nothing on Pornhub ever could. And no faking it! Aside from walking the walk in his interactions with women, he has to read the literature, make the public declarations, call out his friends, go to the marches, and suffer the abuse that we do at the hands of misogynists to be the real deal. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/02/21 04:11 PM |
| 49 | Man speaking out against victim blaming in the Manson case.Is there some kind of centralized location where I can find men who have the balls to write pieces like this? I don’t even care if they don’t want to date me, I just get off on the whole Male Ally Unicorn thing 😅 Edit: I know stuff like this is like finding a needle in a haystack, thank you OP for posting something to give us a little hope! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/02/21 04:01 PM |
| 94 | QUEEN ENERGY 👸🏼 She caught her younger boyfriend lying about being with his coworkerThis reminds me of this And also? Does anyone have that video with sound? When I download it from the reddit post I lose the sound and honestly it is iconic for me! Original Tik Tok’er is off the platform as well :( | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/02/21 03:55 PM |
| 25 | Social media censorship of women talking about real issues is getting out if control.I just looked up this account and I adore it on many levels. Not just to feel seen re: the harassment, but I am really inspired by the athletes featured. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/02/21 02:59 AM |
| 93 | Social media censorship of women talking about real issues is getting out if control.Yeah, someone doesn’t like you. I’m noticing this disdain for calling out misogyny as well. Yes, online (there are dating subreddits where you can literally be banned just for pointing out the biological differences between men and women, even though that’s the majority of who is dating, or talking about misogyny in dating, even though every woman knows it is a real and true thing)....but it’s not just online. I have been chastised for being on online spaces where it occurs, but then I go somewh… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/02/21 02:39 AM |
| 40 | I don't understand how men are attracted to teens.It’s like, not understandable, or at least not relatable, so don’t try too hard. It’s like this thing that turns off in the brain in order to rationalize something that’s objectively wrong, because they really want it and don’t have the will to override harmful biological instincts. It’s interesting to me that men who resist the impulse to not eat a bunch of garbage or go around punching everyone in the face, cannot seem to get this one thing under control. There are men who do in fact do not tu… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/02/21 02:33 AM |
| 42 | Self proclaimed homeless and hungry man begging on tinder (translation in comments)So he can get even more free resources than social welfare will offer, because to him people aren’t people, they’re resources to be mined. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/02/21 05:13 AM |
| 5 | How to not get obsessed with the dating apps .... help?This was enough to bring me back down to earth! https://www.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/lf88bk/online_dating_field_report_tldr_no_dont_bother/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/02/21 04:59 AM |
| 2 | Ever notice how the reasons why women hate men are drastically different than the reasons why men hate women?In my true and lived experience, the most prevalent reason men hate women is for when women boldly state out loud the facts of paragraph 2, to men’s faces. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/02/21 02:26 AM |
| 3 | Reminder - DO NOT POST LINKS TO OTHER SUBSAm I the only one who feels freaked out by all this hatred towards women? I’ll add that it’s not just Reddit I see it, it’s all social media platforms. And in real life. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/02/21 01:38 AM |
| 10 | What in the holy pickmeisha gaslit denial is this horror show that I am reading???Do you think that we’d get kicked off if we simply pointed to posts on MGTOW2, saying hey, take a look at that sub that exists- we’re just trying to align women into recognizing this perspective exists (on varying levels), and not falling into the treatment that stems from it? And that no, we’re not separatists that have written men off (like MGTOW), we’re just advocating for a bare minimum standard of male behavior (in all contexts, not just men we seek to date)- which is healthy- and we do act… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/02/21 07:43 PM |
| 20 | What in the holy pickmeisha gaslit denial is this horror show that I am reading???In a world that hammers us over the head with the messaging that we do in fact need sex with men, whatever the cost may be, how do we shake women awake to break away from the devil they know, and have those unique experiences/seek fulfillment from simply living their best life? That’s what I’m getting at, how to effect change. There has to be something more appealing about living single than being in a crap relationship. It’s not yet resonating with a lot of women. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/02/21 06:21 PM |
| 28 | What in the holy pickmeisha gaslit denial is this horror show that I am reading???She doesn’t believe she can get another car, so she’s trying to drive this one until the wheels fall off. Probably never learned how to ride a bike, and finds the prospect scary. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/02/21 06:05 PM |
| 39 | What in the holy pickmeisha gaslit denial is this horror show that I am reading???I hear what you’re saying. But I think when there are such slim pickings, women are willing to settle for the big energy that makes them feel small and sweet, even if the man is lacking on the “deliverables”, so to speak. Especially these Barb the Builder types, who think if they just work hard enough, they can transform him. Admittedly, it is difficult to wrap ones’s head around the idea that while if we work hard, we can change our career/health/whatever, it’s not a great idea to invest too mu… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/02/21 06:00 PM |
| 86 | What in the holy pickmeisha gaslit denial is this horror show that I am reading???Well, a lot of women are convinced that they need a man, that their worth is validated by a man, and patriarchy/internal misogyny is so ingrained, the worth of female alliances is alien to them. Even if they reach the point where they recognize that another woman can make them feel like a warrior, they still let so much with men slide, because another woman can’t make them feel like a princess. And I don’t know what the answer is there. How do you lose the desire to feel like a protected princes… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/02/21 05:33 PM |
| 293 | What in the holy pickmeisha gaslit denial is this horror show that I am reading???I’m exhausted by divide and conquer, i.e. let’s pit women against each other so we men don’t have to be held accountable for jack shit. I’m not bitter, I’m awake. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/02/21 05:18 PM |
| 16 | Online Dating Field Report: TLDR; no, don’t botherThe strategy I have adopted is being friends first, rather than going immediately into dating. This is based on the old saying, “No one is nicer than a man who wants to have sex with you”. I’ve met some guys from a new social circle and boy oh boy were they sweethearts at first! I imagined future sexual encounters with a couple of them. Then came the last minute offers to “chill” and such, which I declined because you’re going to have to ask me out on a real date if you want to pursue something.… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/02/21 06:18 AM |
| 14 | I am so glad that more and more women are realising that casual sex is a complete scam for women.Why. Why why why why why why. I understand why men don’t see it this way, because it does not benefit them, but.... Why👏🏻dont👏🏻women👏🏻treat👏🏻their👏🏻sexuality👏🏻like👏🏻money👏🏻 Abstaining should have nothing to do with purity. That’s just a patriarchal control mechanism. It is a valuable resource, in an account, like money, that you are judicious (or should be) in investing, depending on the value of what you’re investing in. You are taking on then burden of risk (men are historically more free with… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/02/21 07:37 PM |
| 3 | Why Society MUST focus on teaching the *Rapists* Not To Rape, and NEVER focus on women’s behavior.Lysistrata2021 😘 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/02/21 03:24 AM |
| 87 | 18 year old radfem standing up against sugar baby culture and the exploitation of minors. Proud of my generationI believe these are called “salt daddies” in The Bowl. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/02/21 01:10 AM |
| 7 | Show them the same amount of respect they show you!Oh girl he was so dusty he didn’t have the time for shoelaces, he wore Adidas slides. My guess is tripping over the floppy pant legs. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/21 05:51 AM |
| 22 | Show them the same amount of respect they show you!This. I often brush it off not because I think it’s ok or want to serve his interests, but I have to assess whether I have the resources for both the emotional labor and necessary safety measures to manage such a situation. If I do, I certainly give it back and make it clear what is not acceptable. This is not always the case. I had a horrible male violent drunk of a roommate once, and he deserved to be tossed out on the street in the rain with his PlayStation, by my two stronger male friends. T… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/02/21 11:25 PM |
| 38 | I am so beyond done being the mommy-maid-therapist figure and I honestly think I will remain single for the rest of my life. Love is simply not enough.Perhaps he does need professional help- I’m not going to diagnose the guy but I have a pretty good idea of what personality disorder we’re looking at- but it doesn’t sound like he’s sought that help out. Moreover, a lot of this is also just incompatibility, to be fighting you tooth and nail on your standards (which don’t sound unreasonable). He just isn’t adulting at your level, and I think the only chance he has to learn how- both domestically and in addressing his health- is to live on his own… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/02/21 01:46 AM |
| 31 | Cats, candles, wine and the golden girls??? SIGN ME UP 😍😍😍“If it sounds awful for me, it must be awful for you.” Sir, I see your myopia-tinged threat to nights of uninterrupted Golden Girls reruns, and I raise you a lifetime of celibacy, if you don’t quit mouthing off. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/01/21 03:45 AM |
| 13 | For real though.This is hilarious. I remember when the masks were first a thing, and it confused the men, because it was not a sign of wellness, it was a sign of sickness, which is not sexy, and the catcalling seized. I told a friend and she said “Give it two weeks, they’ll acclimate to it as it because the norm, and find a way to re-insert sex into the equation.” She was wrong! I had one blissful week of not being catcalled. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/01/21 03:35 AM |
| 8 | A Buddhist take on how to deal with abusive NVM: it’s better to be alone.My greatest lesson (and one I still struggle to internalize) from Buddhism is accepting that which is temporary and not trying to hold on to someone who wants to go. It’s really helped me to not fall in too deep with men, and manage my expectations of how long it will stick. If something does stick, well, I think I’ll appreciate and delight in the pleasant surprise more, than if I assumed it was never ending. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/01/21 03:32 AM |
| 1 | People who went through a bad relationship and took the long road of maturing and building themselves after it, do you regret that you had to go through that and wish you remained as you were? Or are you thankful for the experience that you went through?I’m not trying to pull the age card here but.... You’re 25. You are so young. Your neurons haven’t even fully fused. Unless you kind of just live in your hometown (not a diverse city) and don’t interact with people different than you/don’t plan to move/don’t plan to change jobs/don’t plan on further ed....you’re going to change SO much in the next 5 years. You have to go through these things. If anything- given the illusion of choice that apps now afford- to simply have a deeper appreciation for… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/01/21 06:10 PM |
| 13 | From Men’s Mouths to Your Ears. Don’t be a forever girlfriend.This is just my opinion and I’m not judging the choices of the younger users but, I don’t even really understand this idea of marrying the college boyfriend in the first place. I know it happens, and I know at times it works, but goddamn, as someone who is a bit older and has watched people older than me, same age as me, younger than me, go through it.... Unless you’re in kind of a static environment- never left the hometown kinda thing- you change SO much from your early to 20s to your early 30… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/01/21 08:35 AM |
| 3 | Scrote is proud of his Oedipus complex.I’m not saying it’s not illogical and sexist. My hope that the dude grows out of it coexists with me knowing he’s misguided. I do ask these questions, because you can know someone is being ignorant, and still hope they can improve, at the same time. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/01/21 01:03 AM |
| 4 | Just a reminder ladies 😘I am going to try this; especially since you specifically have the hair type I do, it gives me hope. Thank you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/01/21 05:35 PM |
| 16 | Scrote is proud of his Oedipus complex.That was very poorly worded, but then again, I don’t know how old this guy is.... I have a critical thinking response to it. I ask myself if this guy’s experience is similar to mine, and he’s just not as far along in the process yet. I remember feeling- up to as late as my 30s, when I started to see the cracks- that it was unlikely a man could measure up to my dad, who I idolized. No one worked as hard as my dad, or was as attentive/patient/adoring as he was towards my mom. Of course, my dad rec… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/01/21 05:30 PM |
| 11 | Just a reminder ladies 😘Thanks for this. I guess step one for me is the kinda cut that will support this! I tried these weird roller things that you use a tool to pull the hair through a corkscrew like piece, didn’t work. And I’ve tried velcro rollers. I’m literally going to try tiny pencils next time. I’ll look crazy at first but hopefully it then relaxes into something softer. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/01/21 03:47 PM |
| 6 | Just a reminder ladies 😘Exactly! One gust of wind and it falls right out, even with spray! That’s why I was thinking I had to have extensions or something, that aren’t my natural texture. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/01/21 03:19 PM |
| 57 | Just a reminder ladies 😘Totally unrelated but, taking tips on how to get my pin straight hair to do that? ETA: Helpful responses below. I haven’t always had a perfect experience on this sub, but I’ve also found myself in the company of ladies here who are just so fucking nice. Women helping women is so uplifting, even if it’s just with something small, like hair. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/01/21 02:52 PM |
| 104 | An analysis of toxic masculinity. Do you agree?Wow wow wow, this is so well put. I’m glad he exists but am sad that there are so many men who, even if you spoonfed this well-thought out conclusion to other men so they wouldn’t have to use their brains, they’d still be ungrateful and spit it right back out. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/01/21 03:00 AM |
| 52 | Here’s The FactsHappy Cake Day. What infuriates me is when they immediately pull that “slut shaming” card or circle it back to being “puritanical”. And I’m like, Girl, it has nothing to do with being puritanical. This is about health. I like drinking. But even though I like drinking, I’m responsible with the practice, I don’t drink trash just to get drunk. Choices like this just lead to hassle. I like less hassle. And isn’t about shaming you to where I alienate you, it’s about shaking you awake. I’m not trying … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/01/21 01:33 AM |
| 112 | This almost makes me want to redownload dating apps to do the same!This removal of the Bumble filter was really stupid. If the reporting theoretically was a problem, then deal with that specific problem. Now they’ve cut off their nose to spite their face and women, in a polarized country, who don’t even want to hook up with people on “the other side” and get too many bad matches as it is, are just going to stop using the app because it’s too clunky. This filter, for better or worse, is tremendously important to people. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/01/21 01:22 AM |
| 7 | The men (and women) in the comments are LOSING IT 😂JFC women are clapping back at this? With what argument? I don’t have Tik Tok. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/01/21 03:10 AM |
| 9 | I’m new to FDS but I have already been made aware of the men who absolutely despise this sub. I think this tweet sums that matter up nicely.Where “myopia” is in the dictionary, they should just have a picture of your average straight guy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/01/21 03:08 AM |
| 35 | I’m new to FDS but I have already been made aware of the men who absolutely despise this sub. I think this tweet sums that matter up nicely.I find men constantly disagreeing with the nature of my reality. When I tell them I’m reticent to have casual sex due to disproportionate (notice I said “disproportionate”, not “all”) female risk, you think I get empathy and understanding? Nope, the following: MeN hAvE rIsKs TOO YoU kNoW!!! Not as many, pal! If you did, you would be as judicious as you are with your money and emotional investments. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/01/21 03:05 AM |
| 23 | If I’m happy and I know it, start dating? No thanks!I see this a little differently. I have started enjoying dating, so long as they are quality planned-by-him dates, which I insist on. I used to question if I was worth that since apparently women of higher status are accepting less- now I don’t. I enjoy the experience, and the conversation/learning about a new person (I verify some level of character beforehand). I WFH so I superficially appreciate someone noticing that I’m dressed up. I used to feel guilty, knowing it is highly unlikely that th… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/01/21 01:48 AM |
| 5 | Men are not stupid. They are smart. They know when they are doing something wrong, they just don’t care. Stop giving them the benefit of the doubt that they don’t know what they are doingPoor girl. Did you DM her? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/01/21 11:39 PM |
| 231 | Imagine thinking women owe you something, and “arresting” them when you don’t get your way 🤮A delusional state. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/01/21 05:10 PM |
| 13 | What happens after you throw the whole man away... (OC from my Bumble a few weeks ago, not sure how/why getting into a trash can and making that your profile pic would attract women??)Poor relational skills. Projecting on women what he finds humorous. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/01/21 10:49 PM |
| 23 | Ignored and blocked, my dating life is starting to look like a sitcom lolThis one commenter posted a response to this kind of post that went something like “you touch pp? 🥺 NO FOOD!! 🤬 but here is....pp?? 🥺🙏🏻” wish i could find it, had me dying bc it’s so on point 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/01/21 10:31 PM |
| 18 | Throw away the whole man.What. The. Fuck. It starts with the socks, and then it’s full appearance, then it’s activities, then your tastes in movies/music, then family and friends. This is one of those men that should just save up for a robot girl. Replace HIM. With someone cheerful. Like the socks she loves. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/01/21 09:26 PM |
| 17 | Wife gets cancer and husband abandons her at the hospitalThat’s what concerns me. And she’s going to find out the story. So whether it’s a cold and heartless bitch (sad for the kids) or a spineless pick-me (bad for her), or he doesn’t get a woman at all (which will get taken out on everybody), I don’t even know how this goes forward without even more pain in the future. The man would have to have some serious Scrooge Christmas Eve level experience to realize what a terrible thing he’s done. I just hope for the sake of those around him, someone can get… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/01/21 04:57 AM |
| 14 | FDS is for any womanI’m glad you get it. No one, no matter how they look, deserves to be treated so disrespectfully, or should waste their time with someone who doesn’t really want them. We do this with jobs- we would never (barring serious emergencies) show up two hours late for a job interview for a job we really didn’t want anyway, because we’d know there is no chance of getting the job. Those same standards need to be set for interpersonal relationships too. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/01/21 06:54 AM |
| 8 | Found this on Twitter and felt it in the gut!Even when that fave sports team is tanking, year after year after year 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/01/21 06:44 AM |
| 4 | Men always say "we are abused too" bullshit, they are never as abused as much as women are.Given that male relatives of mine were abused by women, I don’t discount that it happens quite a bit. But, what grinds my gears is when they must march into our spaces and insist on being a part of them, when the dynamics simply aren’t the same. They need to create their own space to discuss these issues....like I’m not going to waltz into a support group for boys abused by priests/rabbis and shout down the room with my own story, you know? And that all requires men to start doing relational wor… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/01/21 06:34 AM |
| 22 | BoundariesI’ll never understand this myopic bullshit. If a guy tells me he’s just up for “fun and frolics” (I’ve actually gotten that one on OLD), I don’t try to convince him to do it my way and consider a relationship, I unmatch. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/01/21 06:20 AM |
| 2 | I love the “Here’s my hand with my new ring I bought myself” pics. This is my “here’s my hand with the keys to my new house I bought myself!” pic. Resolve to evolve, sis! Here’s to our new year!Do make use of that bottle opener to celebrate 😉 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/20 04:37 PM |
| 28 | The final boss PickmeishaHoly shit, and literally with the universal emoji for “pick me!” to boot. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/20 08:07 PM |
| 3 | One of the three jewellery pieces I bought myself for Christmas. I am also selling the gifts my NV ex bought me so I can put the money towards something I actually like. I will put my comment in the thread belowLovely! Now take the design of that ring and have a larger piece made to crown your head 👑 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/20 08:05 PM |
| 2 | FDS Principles Are Essential to Professional Success In a Man's WorldWhat are your thoughts on using feminine charm and sexuality as a professional tool, in a way that men don’t/can’t? Would you argue that it does not emulate successful male behavior/is taking the easy way out or rather, that we should use whatever tools we have at our disposal, because a man would do the same if theoretically he had those advantages? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/20 08:04 PM |
| 50 | What gives men the idea you will send them stuff to masturbate toForgive me but, weird analytical me is out of the shadows today. There’s something about porn that taps into a dark side of them that wishes that fantasy were true, and the repeated imagery eventually convinces them it is. To me, in one way it’s similar to cult mentality- people want to be a part of something larger and believe someone has the answers to life, so the concepts get hammered in over and over and over until the lie is nailed on to the hopes/bias. Mainstream porn hammers in its own a… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/20 05:48 PM |
| 4 | Left behind some more girl friends! 👋 culling for 2021Good stuff. I love a good FemaleFriendsandFamilyStrategy post, as I see so many similarities with respect to allowing my boundaries to be crossed in my romantic vs. platonic personal relationships. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/20 03:06 AM |
| 13 | The sooner they get their robots the better for usI’ve been saying all along, for men who prefer a vessel that has no needs of its own, I want these dolls for them. It’s my hopes that they’ll filter themselves out of the dating pool, and that’s less for me to sift through. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/20 02:56 AM |
| 5 | Wow! I think we all know this deep down, but it really struck me seeing it written out so succinctly.As a union member myself, this analogy is excellent. Thanks. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/20 02:28 AM |
| 1 | Dad’s an HVM ❤️The more I read posts like this, the more I want to consider a new career path in counseling, specializing in school-age girls and boys. We get sex ed for biological basics, but we don’t get the relationship ed that ties into that in our youth, to teach boundaries, standards, communication, self-validation, emotional intimacy, and relational work. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/20 02:19 AM |
| 3 | No this isn’t fucking funny- it’s an example of how LVM behavior is perpetuated within familiesYou need to show your mom this video. If it doesn’t embarrass the rest of the family a little, at least she can get a good laugh and know she is not alone enough to where an entire skit was created around this pattern. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/12/20 11:38 PM |
| 7 | I am glad more and more women are having that mindset in this day and age.Honestly, I fucking hate Tik Tok but I am this close to downloading it just so I can follow this woman. So well put. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/12/20 12:53 AM |
| 43 | Online dating in a nutshell; heads men win, tails women loseI understand that instant grat is a thing now with our technology, but it’s so wild to me that we have applied the principle to humans. Like we fucking value residences more than actual people. We value the process of obtaining a home. There is no such thing as porn where there is no offer/counteroffer process on a beautiful home, no inspections, no mortgage, no taxes, just a person throws down five bucks here and there and gets rights to live in a house for as long as they want, when they want,… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/12/20 06:32 PM |
| 42 | Online dating in a nutshell; heads men win, tails women loseIt’s the fantasy of a penis doing for us what a vagina does for them, because it means less work for them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/12/20 06:20 PM |
| 75 | Online dating in a nutshell; heads men win, tails women loseYes. It’s porn. It’s selling a lie- the illusion of choice- that you can have so much access by doing so little. And some men get real mad if you destroy that illusion. It’s the flipside of the fairy tale illusion- you meet a handsome prince, love at first sight, and after jumping through some initial hoops- happily “ever after”. Making no mention of the neverending hard work that goes into being partnered with a person- even when the two of you are mentally stable and healthy- for life. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/12/20 06:19 PM |
| 106 | Untouchable“It” 😅 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/12/20 03:53 PM |
| 19 | UntouchableI’m not very good at parsing out what is photo editing vs. what is real, although I suspect this is an edit? But I want it to be real. Perhaps I will figure out how to do it by Valentine’s Day, and if so I’ll post my costume for you all then :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/12/20 03:51 PM |
| 2 | 🤪 Come check out our sub for posting all of the trolls and dragging them! 😂I would like to post there, thank you! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/12/20 03:49 PM |
| 7 | “I don’t fuck women with pubic hair even though my beard literally looks like I glued my pubes to my face”This is beyond. Looks like someone waiting to die. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/12/20 09:44 PM |
| 50 | This is exactly what we need to be doing.Wow, yes, I hear this a lot, this idea that therapy won’t be necessary, just a good partner will make it all ok. Where does this notion come from, to see a partner like they are a parent? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/12/20 04:52 AM |
| 40 | “If they don’t annoy you they not doing something right”. Why do people glorify shitty relationships???Is this about someone’s partner or their toddler 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/12/20 12:27 AM |
| 7 | An appreciation meme for all the relentless work that FDS mods do to keep unwanted comments from such people at bay. You're the real MVP.Did you make this, OP? It’s adorable. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/12/20 06:37 PM |
| 22 | Ain't that the truth💁♀️That’s like saying “all men do is shut down communication, throw fits and try to one up other men”. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/12/20 06:34 PM |
| 13 | Anyone else see this on r/tinder? No. Just no.Add “Throw” before “Drinks” in that handle. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/12/20 06:44 PM |
| 8 | It might be time for me to unsub from AITA. This one made me want to cry. My heart is broken for herTo clarify, I meant me personally, as I know them off the top of my head due to my work and it would take me 5 seconds I can afford for the baby boy to type the name out, and then say “Now be gone”, while I’m standing in line somewhere. I do understand not doing it as a matter of principle, and wouldn’t advocate for spending time researching. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/12/20 07:45 PM |
| 7 | Guys need to stop being comfortable about things that don’t affect them....Don’t let women pull this either. A pick-me friend of mine knows damn well her boyfriend’s friend is a piece of shit, but while she’ll come after her female friends who cave to his advances, she never holds the actual guy accountable, saying shit like “I can’t tell him how to live!” And what it’s about is that she doesn’t want to call her boyfriend to the carpet about having this trash friend, because God forbid she offend him and maybe be single and she’s riding this until the wheels fall off. … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/12/20 06:42 PM |
| 4 | Guys need to stop being comfortable about things that don’t affect them....You know what drives me nuts? When I’ve told new men about the- not isolated incidents- patterns I’ve recognized in dating, and they respond in disbelief with “Who are these guys you’re talking to??” as if I made some kind of wrong choice by not telepathically knowing they were garbage prior to them demonstrating they were garbage, and as if this pattern is not a true and lived experience. That level of invalidation I’ve also learned comes from men who will absolutely fall in with the pattern do… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/12/20 06:38 PM |
| 5 | Can we really be shocked at this point that men run the feminist account? Literally, they’re trying to take over everywhere and silence us!Isn’t r/ feminism also modded by a man? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/12/20 06:31 PM |
| 23 | It might be time for me to unsub from AITA. This one made me want to cry. My heart is broken for herThis is exactly what I was thinking. It’s a tough one because I feel for the innocent baby. But yes, I would refer him to a charity. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/12/20 06:29 PM |
| 6 | To all the LVM, NVM, and pervs who think we are threatened by younger women... “no, you’re never going to get it!” 🎶 🎵It’s refreshing to see a post by someone over 35, as I feel like we have unique challenges when dealing with men our age and up. I wish we could have a unique flair for such posts! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/12/20 10:11 PM |
| 5 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered December 3 2020As far as projected self-judgement, perhaps yes when it comes to keeping around an LVM. But as for poor parenting....I would be super conscientious, as the idea of messing up my little charge (I know some degree of it is inevitable) really bothers me- I’m not sure if that’s self-judgement/self-doubt in my ability to parent, or just a high level of diligence that most could stand to have more of. But all in all, more than anything it honestly just feels like for all of my flaws and women’s flaws,… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/12/20 10:01 PM |
| 17 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered December 3 2020Something I find myself doing is holding women to really high standards, and holding men to low standards. It’s like I am totally unsurprised when men fail at interpersonal relationships... like I expect it? So when, say, a kid in my family ends up in a bad home situation due to bad behavior from both parents, in my mind I find myself holding the mother accountable for her bad behavior (which it is still my belief you should). But then, unfairly, I feel not as focused on the man’s mistakes....no… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/12/20 02:01 PM |
| 5 | What would happen?This was my first thought, and I concluded, “They’d have to roll out those government issued fembots real quick.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/11/20 11:44 PM |
| 1 | Why waste an award to say this?Lol I don’t know if anyone knows what you did there, given the pic for r/FDSSuperfans 😅 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/11/20 11:33 PM |
| 15 | Have you noticed that men aren't funny?This is an interesting observation. Specifically on OLD, out of the hundreds of men I’ve spoken to, I can think of exactly two who made me laugh (imagine my disappointment when they turned out to be sex-desperate creeps). Wit is such a rare quality for a man to have that it immediately sets them apart, you’d think more would work on it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/11/20 11:25 PM |
| 8 | Holidays make it easy to spot LVM. Thank goodness my pick me days of cooking a full thanksgiving meal so a LVM can drink, watch football, and nap are over.My mom doesn’t want anyone else in the kitchen except for a specialty dish my dad makes because she’s kind of OCD about that process (and it’s a small kitchen). But my older brother for as long as I can remember (he is 11 years older) always picked up plates and washed dishes after holiday meals and he was never asked. I always admired that, and knowing that exists, I wouldn’t settle for less. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/11/20 11:18 PM |
| 102 | May be FDS or may be that after I saw myself in a picture with my “hot” crush I was more attractive... either way, even hot men are meh now.I’ll meet someone hot, I get that vibe, it gets to the point where I have to explain that yes, I do love sex, but no, NSA sex is actually not my wheelhouse, the safe feeling I get from commitment from an emotionally available man is, and the face just falls, and it’s no longer cute to me. Like you literally see the face change, as if I just informed them they have an incurable illness. So disappointing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/11/20 10:31 PM |
| 4 | Thanksgiving for the Things That Aren'tI was waiting for a post that could articulate recognition of the fact that FDS is in fact, for some of us, not a cakewalk, but a painful transition, worthwhile as it may be. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/11/20 10:18 PM |
| 25 | ......grossWell yes, that’s true. As infuriating as stupidity can be, at least it’s less work to parse out what you’re dealing with. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/11/20 01:06 AM |
| 14 | So this is empowermentOh girls. If this is the best life you can hope to have right now in your circumstances, I am sorry. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/11/20 01:01 AM |
| 83 | ......grossI know we’re mad about the porn but can we also talk about the lack of awareness/negligence of details. Drives me nuts, this guy would never survive the apocalypse. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/11/20 12:56 AM |
| 7 | Scrote from ELEVEN years ago just rang my bell unannounced to "reconnect" 🤮What of your address on your voter registration, utility bills and where you get packages delivered? I guess you can do the latter two through the post office but what a pain in the ass. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/11/20 12:49 AM |
| 40 | Don't ask me how though.Be it nature or nurture (I think it’s nature, I was genuinely into boys/masculinity when I was 4), I still don’t know how to get around it at this point. Gay conversion is a failure, so I can’t imagine straight conversion would fare any better. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/11/20 12:45 AM |
| 23 | If This Ain’t A MOOD!!I love that the word “access” is used here, because it’s so on point. When property is high in demand (and a female body is high in demand- who is majority on dating apps and what is at the top of their list?) and using it is not a given, that is not “getting with” the property, that is access to the property. And if you wouldn’t grant just anyone access to your material, replaceable property, why the hell would you to your irreplaceable body? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/11/20 12:40 AM |
| 64 | Thought you all would appreciate this.Protect this man, not enough like him. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/11/20 10:47 PM |
| 13 | Sorry that a part of my body that’s designed to feed my babies is unattractive to you /sIs there a point where it’s been bothersome? Or was it fine if you liked the guy? I am on the precipice of seeing 50/55 year old junk for the first time and would like some mental prep 😅 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/11/20 10:56 PM |
| 18 | Sorry that a part of my body that’s designed to feed my babies is unattractive to you /sIs this loss of elasticity actually true this early in life? I’ve seen no correlation, simply that some sag and some don’t, like a genetic difference. However, the oldest I’ve seen is 40 (his looked fine...meanwhile the most low hanging I’ve seen was on guys in their 20s?) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/11/20 10:41 PM |
| 20 | Never Settle, Queens!That are “socially distanced”. Of course until “ToUcH PP nOw?” 🥺 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/11/20 04:05 AM |
| 9 | Thanks for your input Teddy; you’ve actually changed my mind. NOT!“Lower your standards? Make it easy for me? Please?” JFC they work harder at beating levels in video games | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/11/20 12:26 AM |
| 12 | the image speaks for itselfThis is visual poison. Please send HVM starter pack antidote? 😅 Although I maintain there is nothing inherently wrong with Samsung phones. Feeling quite bamboozled by Apple as of late. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/11/20 05:47 PM |
| 8 | Love LanguagesI think the physical touch love language should specifically be construed as non-sexual touch, aka ‘touch you would not enjoy with someone you did not like”. Men will enjoy sex with someone they don’t like, but they won’t enjoy cuddling or holding hands with someone they don’t like. Because no one enjoys acts of service, gifting, etc., for people they don’t like, so we should frame the touch one in the same way. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/11/20 02:49 AM |
| 10 | Man wants to control what his girlfriend wears, lies and blames his mother. Although everyone in his life tells him he's wrong, he continues to think he was in the right. But fortunately, there is a happy ending here.This is one of the weirdest breakup stories I’ve ever read. It sounds like something out of a sitcom. Also I wish I could make custom clothes like that! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/11/20 02:40 AM |
| 3 | WHERE’S THE LIE?Oh wow, thank you, saving this info. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 05:42 AM |
| 10 | WHERE’S THE LIE?I guess what I am wondering is examples of how you’ve seen it manifest in dating. My limited experience was HVW, but it was just dumb luck. If you don’t mind, I would be greatly appreciative to know what to look for...how it differs from LVM. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 05:02 AM |
| 13 | WHERE’S THE LIE?women can be just as grimy How so? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 02:28 AM |
| 6 | FDS, But Make It Spooky“I can land her in my chip-crumbed Marilyn Manson shirt, ill fitting jeans, and unwashed hair with an offer to ‘meet up’ at a metal dive, first round on me!” fwiw I would not dare, were I to be pursuing a beautiful goth girl, but still... I Want👏🏻That👏🏻Level👏🏻Of👏🏻Confidence👏🏻 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/11/20 08:19 PM |
| 1 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered November 9 2020This is insightful, thanks. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/11/20 04:51 PM |
| 41 | Apex Redditor... 😂 #goldI think there is some validity to that theory of natural programming. It’s what we do with that innate programming, and how we manage to control and override it with critical thought and discipline if what may have served 100,000 years ago does not serve now...these guys never talk about that when it comes to sexuality. I submit my unwavering attraction to men (and the urge to pursue and grab a man to get something)- which more often than not does not seem to be aligned with my best interests- a… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/11/20 03:40 PM |
| 8 | It’s sad that this kind of behavior from men is so rare.Did you find that your female friends were better about thoughtfulness reciprocation, or not necessarily so? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/11/20 03:26 PM |
| 5 | if that ain’t the truth. we need to start looking at cheating as the man’s defect and not what the woman was lacking.An ex had an emotional affair, but I have no hard proof of any physical cheating from my exes. That being said, there is a different one who tried to cheat with me, so I wouldn’t be surprised if at some point he cheated when he was with me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/11/20 02:01 AM |
| 2 | if that ain’t the truth. we need to start looking at cheating as the man’s defect and not what the woman was lacking.Just another reminder to get your Gardisil shots! Because you never know, and there’s no sense in dying over this. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/11/20 01:51 AM |
| 3 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered November 9 2020I’m not a straight person (and no, I’m not “living straight” bc of dating men, I just don’t get into female relationships here bc it’s not the right sub). And yes, I meant I don’t recommend it, as I don’t believe sex is worth dying for. It’s not a condemnation of being gay. For added context, this wasn’t someone born and raised there who couldn’t leave, it was an ex-pat working there for a year, and he was very much warned. The desire was that overpowering (of course, I still can’t wrap my head … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/11/20 01:38 AM |
| 14 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered November 9 2020Had a funny thought. Heard on a podcast another story about a gay man whose drive to have sex was so strong, he literally risked his irreplaceable life to pursue a man, while living in a country where homosexuality was punishable by death at the time (I certainly don’t condone countries with those laws, but I also don’t condone breaking them, as it’s just too dangerous if you’re not a VIP, and just not worth the risk for sex). I could not help but think on how meanwhile, men I have interacted wi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/11/20 09:06 PM |
| 14 | International Men's Day is on 11/19. Placing bets for men completely ignoring this day until International Women's Day (3/8), specifically to ask "BuT wHaT aBoUt MeN?!"Holy shit that’s so true. Setting a reminder to tell a few I know to enjoy their special man day, on 11/19, at 11:59:59 PM. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/11/20 04:08 AM |
| 1 | Remember: In a relationship, respect is a very important key element. Know what it looks like and know what red flags to look out for.On another note, dying to know where I could find a workplace like that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/11/20 04:04 AM |
| 5 | Are literally all the men sitting there laughing at us as they ask us on "walking dates" and try to get us to come over to their apartments?Oh Lord. I’m sorry. A software engineer posted recently about how she created a bot that helped filter out those who didn’t meet her basic standards, and it was very sobering. I thought to myself that I wish I could do the same myself....but honestly if the filter I used on OKC once was any indication (I filtered out every man who answered “yes” to whether they would have sex on a first date, and, surprise! “it doesn’t look like anyone etc etc”....except one asexual who lived 50 miles away!), I’… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/11/20 05:55 PM |
| 8 | Are literally all the men sitting there laughing at us as they ask us on "walking dates" and try to get us to come over to their apartments?Thank you for posting this for the younger crowd. Spot on. I remember when it was like this as well. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/11/20 03:14 PM |
| 15 | Are literally all the men sitting there laughing at us as they ask us on "walking dates" and try to get us to come over to their apartments?I don’t think it’s as coordinated as that. I think the majority of men on the apps are either 1) just lazy and this is their time to shine bc so many quality guys are off apps or 2) exhausted but also seek company, not fully processing that, you know, if you’re that exhausted, it’s a time to learn how to be alone for a bit to gather your energy 3) jaded but still secretly need us so they claim to be on because they’re “just bored”. All wastes of time. People really need to learn how to cope bein… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/11/20 03:05 PM |
| 9 | Reminder that men are men and gay men can be misogynists too.I see what’s she’s saying. There isn’t a single person here who doesn’t know who created it, and who benefits most from it. At the same time, toxicity is toxicity and patriarchal attitudes are patriarchal attitudes, and she’s saying to watch out for it in either gender. Pointing it out in women is not an “if, then” (and I see that knee jerk conclusion a ton) that automatically leads to denying the origins and main beneficiaries of patriarchy. It’s merely cautionary in saying not to underestimate… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/11/20 04:36 AM |
| 4 | Let a bot run through a dating site and match me with 9870 guys. Here are the resultsWow wow wow. Some schadenfreude here, ngl. I was feeling frustrated and even my results aren’t as bad as this (although admittedly I have the same end results where it goes nowhere with everyone- seems like yours are upfront about being substandard while as mine do well with faking it for a good while...I guess as least less time wasted for you!). I wish I knew how to run a bot like this on my stats! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/11/20 04:04 AM |
| 1 | Where's the lie?Make no mistake, I’m fully aware of the source, and not- ahem- falling out of line on that one 😉 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/11/20 06:27 PM |
| 16 | Where's the lie?I know this is directed towards men, but for what it’s worth, I’d be lying if I said there are not women out there who also adopted a “shut up, know your place and get in line” attitude towards me, particularly lately, given the time of year. Aside from truly immoral and egregious behavior/human rights abuses I observe in others, I try to be better and watch myself on that. Catching myself in an approach (that I hate being used on myself) that attempts to dictate the actions and words of others … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/11/20 04:01 PM |
| 12 | Even a 35 yo man has these same meltdowns but they're the logical sex!!!100% agree it is a cultural construct. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/11/20 03:47 PM |
| 5 | Broke up with BF bcs of OnlyFansOh I know. I guess what I was hoping for was a story where you asked why you hadn’t heard about the “best friend” in all the time you’ve known him, followed by some comical mental gymnastics on his part. Sometimes I have to laugh at these gaslighting attempts, or I’d cry. But definitely sorry this happened to you! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/11/20 03:22 AM |
| 12 | Broke up with BF bcs of OnlyFansHas he ever told you about this “best friend” in the past? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/11/20 11:30 PM |
| 1 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered November 1 2020See what I wrote further down for more details about LVM in the world around us. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/11/20 05:17 PM |
| 14 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered November 1 2020I got a guy to admit that he was still banging his ex, while now on the app, “exploring his options”. After he tells me this, his way of handling it was asking if he was now “excommunicated”, as it’s so funny to portray a woman acting reasonably as acting severe, to take the onus off yourself. I was also thinking about how this man probably has friends. And I am conflicted, as I have male friends who have been very helpful to me, but romantically have demonstrated LVM behavior to others. It’s co… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/11/20 03:35 AM |
| 4 | Because a wife should be subservient to her husbandWhat tha fuuuuu.......this is a right as a citizen! Are there women who actually follow this? Please tell me at least it’s merely a polite nod and a “Yes, dear” and she does as she pleases in that booth...... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/10/20 11:20 PM |
| 261 | Happy Friday QueensBoth delicates, but only one has been offering support when I really need it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/10/20 10:55 PM |
| 15 | NO, We Don’t. 🙄 🤦🏻♀️WeR’e NoT pIcKy! They are when they get bored because they didn’t have a challenge. If chasing men worked....I’m one of those women who’d do it. Because I like to get shit done. Do I get sex for a bit while my little prince kicks back and relaxes as I make the social plans, take on the mental load and court him while he breadcrumbs? Yes! But I’m not looking for my little prince- I’m looking for a king. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/10/20 03:58 PM |
| 7 | The sex subreddit is a dumpster fire. More in the comments.DM’d? Rescue mission? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/10/20 03:51 PM |
| 33 | Meme: The Hebephile in DenialThis is just depressing. More dating strategy posts, please. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/10/20 12:18 AM |
| 9 | It's men who suck the fun out of everythingYeah this is true. I do ask them questions (I love learning about people and their passions, even if it’s not my thing), but I’m working on the discomfort of silence (and feeling like it means I failed), the silence being when it starts to feel like an interview on my part so I cut off the questions, and reciprocation is low as they’re not terribly curious about learning more about my interests (I have many) and/or who I am as a person in general. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/10/20 12:07 AM |
| 3 | Have fun, MegTrue, true, I see what you mean what with the dramatic comment. He might be predisposed towards that kind of language, instead of how it’s “eye opening” (or something more down to earth like that), to reflect how we change when we associate with more HV people in general. I suppose I took it to mean along the lines of when people say religion changed their life. Something about it- or the validation of a HVW romantic interest- serves as a kick in the ass for men. But I do hope it sticks. I also … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/10/20 10:32 PM |
| 49 | It's men who suck the fun out of everythingI wish men didn’t expect me to be their dog and pony show on a first date, with my infinitely more colorful stories and overall personality, while they are less fun as they sit back to get entertained in exchange for that $10 drink, thinking that that’s fair value for an hour (plus the hour I spent getting ready so as to keep up with the competition) of carrying the mental load, and that the fun starts for me when their pp goes in while the man attached to it completely ignores my clear directiv… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/10/20 09:58 PM |
| 10 | Have fun, MegWell, we’ll see. Doesn’t look like a great prospect on paper, but still I’d like to think that for her sake- and for women in general- that it’s possible for this sort to be moved into committing to a genuine level up much like those who “find Jesus” do, and that it’s not just because of the honeymoon stage. It can happen, I’ve seen men (even ones with records) clean up their acts and turn it around. Lord knows, there aren’t currently enough HVM to go around for every HVW, so the idea of every H… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/10/20 09:44 PM |
| 5 | Remember ladies! It's okay for males to body shame women but never the other way around 🤡HVM don’t make those jokes, and that’s all I’m in the market for, so I’ll not make them either.... unless the man truly, truly did me dirty. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/10/20 05:04 PM |
| 2 | !!!Your ability to do this is admired. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/10/20 10:56 PM |
| 4 | !!!I also found a comfort zone where I’ve met great people who are “doers”. But have not developed anything beyond the social/superficial. I do hope that some of those you meet can transition into actual out-there-in-the-world sources of support! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/10/20 03:34 AM |
| 2 | I paused dating this year because of how many creeps I encountered, this morning I found out staying home and not engaging with men doesn't keep me safe either.Ok. I just watched it, and can’t conclude much as it seems rather performative. If it’s not, yeah, it does sound like cognitive impairment. I want to make it crystal clear that this was not a DeFeNd MaN! comment. Let’s not throw the baby out with the bath water. It was a post that acknowledges the worst case scenario, but is leaning towards what is most likely (for the sake of OP’s sanity), and please let’s not gloss over my suggestions that she remain vigilant and take self-protection measures,… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/10/20 02:58 AM |
| 12 | !!!No way! I had a psychiatrist like that who repeatedly pronounced my name wrong for years...that was when I didn’t have the backbone to correct him. Like I would literally leave voicemails with the correct pronunciation 😂 Anyway, when I get the platitudes, they generally come from folks who have the good fortune of being well socially supported, who cannot fathom a life that is otherwise, unless you’re like, a terrible person (I’m not). I gently remind them that not everyone comes into the world … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/10/20 12:50 AM |
| 45 | !!!I’m just going to respond to this as a counterweight to all the invalidating platitudes you’re going to get, about how it’s better to be thirsty than to drink salt water (yes! but it still really sucks to be thirsty). I too feel terribly alone. I always have fair weather people to hang with as I’m sociable, but no one who can like, deal with the hard times (nowhere to even go for the holidays without risking some level of emotional abuse)- friends, family, all just completely lost when it comes … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/10/20 11:27 PM |
| 5 | I Tried Femdom And It Was Nowhere Near As "Empowering" As The BDSM Community Would Have You BelieveShoot, “emphasis still on what I could do for the (usually male) ‘partner’ and not on what I was interested in” for money is exploitative? Take the sex out of this and that’s my job 😅 (not laughing at the post, just interesting how that phrase hit different) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/10/20 12:11 PM |
| 25 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered: October 16 2020Just noting that a certain dating sub for people over 30 has an auto message, when a comment is removed for “generalizing”, that lumps in FDS, as a prohibited philosophy- with MGTOW (which never has a single good thing to say about any woman), PUA (which attempts to coerce women), incels (which are either feeling entitled to women or want them dead). Wanting to serve women’s best interests makes FDS a hate group. Ouch. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/10/20 11:40 PM |
| 14 | Don’t text firstI experimented a little with leading, but when it got to the point where I had to show him on a map where the subway station was because he clearly wasn’t going to figure it out....I didn’t feel empowered, I didn’t feel enamored of my little prince...it felt....wrong? Mother like? Gross? I don’t know, but it did not correlate with my energy at all. Like even the photo on this post makes me feel weird. But don’t some women like this kind of thing? Ones with masculine energy? It would seem so. Mor… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/10/20 02:21 AM |
| 22 | Every man I’ve asked to get tested, whined about it.Because the knowledge of a positive result threatens the sex supply at worst, means condoms until commitment at best. But, we all know that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/10/20 09:11 PM |
| 3 | We know, they know, doctors know. Why are they still getting away with it?I don’t know how women do it. I suppose I’d have figured it out if it happened accidentally, but feeling trapped like this, unsupported, both mothering my child and managing another adult, has always scared me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/10/20 09:09 PM |
| 2 | Got my first dating sub ban!Thank you for this support! The ban came from pick-me’s twisting it about “slut shaming”, because of course. People who are not ready to stop abusing any vice- drugs, gambling, whatever- pull this, but it’s wild to me that mods would boot someone who is advocating for healthy relationships for women, yet stay silent when the men who want the upper hand on women for an easy gain in power go off. I hope women are reading and taking it in. I cannot even imagine the words you’re saying coming out of… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/10/20 02:30 PM |
| 2 | I think I hit the goldmine here. “Imagine how a man feels thinking that you are scared he will rape you.”So fix the men around you, dummy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/10/20 03:35 AM |
| 3 | Societal gaslighting about women and their “mood swings” when in reality men have mood swings way more often. Do not be silent about this any longer! Bring it up! Are they having erectile dysfunction mood swings? Is it porn induced? Request they see a mental health professional about this!I’m going to take that last paragraph as a joke and not actually implement it because since they are so emotional, the last thing I need to do is say the most possible triggering thing just to mock him and then have to deal with a tantrum. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/10/20 12:23 AM |
| 12 | Further proof that it's really not that hard to clean up after yourselfAaawwww HVBB 👶❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/10/20 05:31 AM |
| 7 | Took a stroll through MGTOW this morning, thought I would share the worst of the worst for the laughs. Discuss!jesus MGTOW2 broke off from the toxic original and was specifically formed in order to just discuss positive shit like sports, money, furniture they made, anything but women, feminism, etc. the guys there had varying reasons for separating, but truly were going their own way. i feel bad for their OGs, with scrotes having to be heard in every space. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/10/20 01:25 AM |
| 15 | On a Facebook Post about an expensive proposal, you're bound to have many Pickmeishas appear in the comments! Some of these are hilarious, some are downright sad.And I wore burlap at our wedding in the park, and we served soup made out of twigs and rocks we foraged there and it was FINE. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/10/20 01:18 AM |
| 8 | What? Should I ask him if he can take me on his bike to a field he knows? The low effort I swear, this was his SECOND message to me!JFC he doesn’t even know you! For all he knows, you’re crazy and would knock you both off it. They value not spending $20 over their own lives. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/10/20 01:10 AM |
| 3 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered: October 7 2020“Let’s get coffee! Not like in a date type way, not trying to hit on you (haha!), only genuinely interested in further discussion of ‘x’ with you.” Keep it breezy. It’s worked for me. Although when it’s made clear it’s not a date and there’s no chance, you’ll find that a lot of those meets dry up....men often aren’t interested in you as a person, they’re motivated by sexual opportunity. That being said, you can use that motivation to serve your purposes if you need to talk to them for some other… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/10/20 12:33 AM |
| 7 | They are hitting rock bottom soon (OC)We forgot “Come over for drinks, lady who has never met me!” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/10/20 02:12 AM |
| 24 | To love & to obey? Nah, sisI mean that lady nodding at the very end, the relative, don’t miss that! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/10/20 12:50 AM |
| 124 | To love & to obey? Nah, sisI know they probably just edited it in but nonetheless, that nodding at the end is gold. 👑 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/10/20 08:59 PM |
| 29 | Wrestling anime guy took half a year of psychology in high school and thinks he knows everything. Goes on 25 minute sexist, homophobic, and victim blaming rant that basically translates too... “I can’t get laid!” 😂😂I ask myself the same question. It’s true, from the sexual standpoint, and not seeking genuine connection. Then I remember, oh right, because also we do things for them, and serve as visual status symbols, in ways their bro won’t. To the status, I tell them they’ve been sold a lie, it’s all bullshit, that we’re not worth the trouble and to not even devote energy to convince “simps” otherwise, much less think of us. Better to focus on self-improvement. Rent an escort to pretend to be your date if… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/10/20 02:49 PM |
| 119 | Wrestling anime guy took half a year of psychology in high school and thinks he knows everything. Goes on 25 minute sexist, homophobic, and victim blaming rant that basically translates too... “I can’t get laid!” 😂😂When I see things like this I think, “Yes, we are trash. You should avoid us at all costs. Do not interact with us, do not pursue access to our bodies, do not speak of us, do not even think of us. If your sexual wants are unmanageable, find a likeminded male, close your eyes, disconnect, and use each other’s orifices. Whatever it takes, as long as you have nothing to do with us.” If this kind of guy doesn’t procreate, unless he can change, it’s for the best. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/10/20 02:24 PM |
| 31 | The fact that men are fertile 100% of the time and women are fertile 2+ days out of the month and yet the burden of birth control falls to the woman is one of the greatest schemes of the patriarchyThat’s so interesting. Those scientists knew male nature, knew they couldn’t be relied upon to take it regularly because it’s not their body that will change.... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/10/20 05:13 AM |
| 10 | Wise words to keep in mind, queens ❤Question for you all: regardless of who is denying you the basics, if for whatever reason you still have to interact with that person, and you see them consistently treating a person close to them far better than apparently they ever thought you deserved (even though you were good to them) and doing things for others easily that you had to beg them to do for you- how do you deal with that selective neglect? Sure you cut them out if you can, but how do you not wonder about the why of it, not take… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/10/20 05:07 AM |
| 1 | Would you go back to your old job? No? Then DON’T ever take an ex back.Oh great, so the advice didn’t suck across the board, because based on the overall negative tone that didn’t acknowledge there was anything of use there, that was the impression I got. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/09/20 05:09 PM |
| 3 | Would you go back to your old job? No? Then DON’T ever take an ex back.“Happy with job” was an analogy. If you were in a situation where didn’t need the income to begin with, you wouldn’t take a job that made you unhappy. It would be gravy. If you don’t need the male validation to begin with, you wouldn’t take a man that would make you unhappy. If you need no help, and what you’re doing is working for you, great. Honestly, you sounded and continue to sound frustrated and miserable, but I recognize that that’s a comfort zone for some (although I don’t know why you’d… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/09/20 04:42 PM |
| 2 | Would you go back to your old job? No? Then DON’T ever take an ex back.It’s not a sin to want to talk to someone. There is no place where this was said, see Rule 2 . It’s not piety, but we don’t want to see people- men or women- think Partner is going to fix all your sads. They can’t. They shouldn’t. It’s too much pressure for one (and we don’t want to see people in the habit of using logical fallacies in their communication either, this is how relationships turn toxic). If after a decade you haven’t made a single friend, therapy- especially group- would be helpful… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/09/20 03:42 PM |
| 3 | Would you go back to your old job? No? Then DON’T ever take an ex back.Well, I’m replying to someone who is looking at it as a need right now. and I know that feeling so, we have to start somewhere 🤷♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/09/20 01:16 PM |
| 2 | Would you go back to your old job? No? Then DON’T ever take an ex back.Yes, we need love, but you will have to make sacrifices for anything valuable, we learn this as we emotionally develop. I would recommend making some friends first, and finding work and passions you do care about, so you don’t fall into the trap of relying on Partner totally for your happiness. Most HVM will avoid you from the jump, and as for the rest, you will either be left eventually, exhaust the person with your seeking to have him be the source of all happiness (and consequently be in an u… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/09/20 01:14 PM |
| 32 | Petition to make this the sub’s iconGreat movie, don’t get me wrong, but it’s too disturbing. I’d like something more uplifting. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/09/20 05:36 AM |
| 7 | Would you go back to your old job? No? Then DON’T ever take an ex back.Reframe, since a job is a need, and a man is a want. Instead of equating having no man with having no job, equate it with a society in which we have a UBI, or you have some other form of modest guaranteed income that’s enough to get by on. And you seek out employment (man) on top of it in order to enrich your life with more income (a want, not a need), but will not settle for crap offers that will chip your self esteem, as that would take away time from finding a job that makes you happy and/or … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/09/20 05:34 AM |
| 2 | This is literally LVM logic. They blame their lack of charisma on us instead of introspecting and becoming a better person to be around.Make lurkers: spread out your dates on to a timeline where the $20 won’t get you bent. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/09/20 05:06 AM |
| 38 | Instant swipe-left triggers for OLDHinge prompt: What is your ideal first date?” Answer: “A socially distanced walk” 6 weeks ago and it still makes me mad 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/09/20 02:27 AM |
| 16 | How much time do you guys give to see if he can make you orgasm?I also interview for sex, to see what he can do with his hands/mouth. I’m sure you’ll get responses that say “one and done” but personally, I know what each woman likes is different (and what I like is especially different from most women and takes getting used to) and it takes time to orient to a new female body....so I’ve given up to 6 encounters. I’ve had it take up to 3 with another woman, but we also share anatomy, so I figure give the guy a few extra shots. But that’s the maximum. I’d have… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/09/20 02:29 AM |
| 9 | Classic “let’s go on a walk”say it once more for the pick-me in the back 😂 ETA: Take You To This Field I Know deserves a Lonely Island level parody video. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/09/20 01:15 AM |
| 1 | LVM Bitching About Paying $20 For A MealI just took it to be “While I will decide what you are, you know the decision is made easy and immediately tips towards friend at best after this, right?” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/09/20 10:38 PM |
| 5 | Starting a new chapter: My journey from alcoholic waitress to first solo apartment and new careerI like the sense of personal accountability and your determination. Congrats on your level up. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/09/20 08:29 PM |
| 35 | Classic “let’s go on a walk”Just today on my Hinge: “maybe we can meet up sometime” 🤦🏻♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/09/20 08:26 PM |
| 29 | LVM Bitching About Paying $20 For A MealOh the second she said “friend zone”, that face! I split or alternate the bill with my friends and boyfriends, not my suitors. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/09/20 08:22 PM |
| 1 | I have decided to date myself, & Thursday nights are date nights!Yes! And the kind of dates I love that I can never get men to go on :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/09/20 02:12 PM |
| 1 | I have decided to date myself, & Thursday nights are date nights!Lady, you deserve it all and more. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/09/20 02:10 PM |
| 8 | Those of you who are no-communication with toxic family members and having to distance from friends because of the pandemic. How do you celebrate your birthdays/ holiday events alone?I like to do something creative that requires my concentration because I get into flow mode, where I forget about things that are bothering me, and when I’m done, I’ve accomplished something. I’ll post my work online later, for validation and connection. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/09/20 04:35 AM |
| 4 | Don’t be Bob the Builder for a man.I’ve been Woman 1. I’ve been her so many times. I remember I used to refer to myself as The Training Ground, because I kept seeing men turn it around for later partners. Not that any woman should have to do that work, but nonetheless, I really think it’s time a man comes into my life that is already good to go, because he’s had the training. And that is why I don’t get jealous of exes. As long as she doesn’t stir up trouble, I really don’t mind them. In fact, because I know it’s a rare thing for… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/09/20 10:53 PM |
| 34 | This Buzzfeed article shows older celebrities now and when they were 30 years old. This makes me happy as I was so afraid for my twenties to end and for the mythical "Wall" to hit - I see these cherub cheeks on lovely women at 30 and feel good about my future.The baldness does weird things. Patrick Stewart passed for 50 starting in his early 30s. On the other hand, he must’ve taken alright care of himself because he was still passing for 50 at 70 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/09/20 05:05 PM |
| 7 | Lets throw FDS an all day Birthday Party when we reach 100k subscribersI think today could be the day! ETA: YAAAASSS!!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/09/20 01:25 PM |
| 2 | Life will test you the minute you decide to be a HVW.I saw that post, but moreso I was curious, based on the wording, if the terms and conditions for Hinge explicitly state that it is for the relationship minded only, and not for hookups. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/09/20 01:16 PM |
| 3 | Ladies, I found another gem on the dating sub. I don’t care how they explain their need for coffee dates. It’s a no for me, but all the other pickmes can have these men. 🥴I don’t know what you do about those willing to cross the Pickme line. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/09/20 04:17 AM |
| 8 | You literally can’t make this shit up.Exactly. While the pranks other commenters propose here are amusing, in all honesty, I just don’t have the time to do it for a date that will disappoint us both and will lead nowhere, even as a joke. At best, I’d give the benefit of the doubt and say we can both walk while we Facetime so I can be productive and run errands at the same time, while he takes a look at me (we know thats what it’s about) and assesses if I’m worth the investment of a proper date (and I assess his conversational abilit… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/09/20 03:47 AM |
| 1 | Life will test you the minute you decide to be a HVW.Terms and conditions for Hinge? Where are they? I didn’t see them when I signed up and when I google them now it just pushes me to the app. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/09/20 03:25 AM |
| 1 | Drink dates in the UK and EuropeI’m not in the UK and I like these. I don’t feel like I need to commit to a meal on first sight. Drinks are fine, and if the place is nice enough, it’s a comparable investment. I do appreciate the option or continuing the date with dinner, if it’s going well, as opposed to just sitting there getting hammered. I don’t meet guys- through OLD or in the wild- that are willing to make those kinds of efforts though, not a single one out of hundreds I have spoken to. And I am exhausted from the defensi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/20 04:58 PM |
| 2 | Fun fact really sad factI’m torn on this. Existing in a vacuum, outside of a (patriarchal) societal structure, being married is an objectively less happy situation for a woman. That being said, we do exist within that society, which is set up to benefit married (and to a lesser degree, partnered) people. I see the benefits my partnered friends receive- everything from social approval which brings all kinds of social support, invitations, etc., to tax breaks. Those things make life easier. You know how celebrities get f… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/09/20 05:23 PM |
| 8 | Fun fact really sad factI want to put “Live In Your Own Peace Along Side the Faults of Men” on a bumper sticker. ❤️ Acknowledges harsh truth, while emphasizing that I can exist and observe it from a healthy emotional distance.... ....a distance that allows for a primary focus on the bet with the best ROI- not ruling out romance for good, but acknowledging the odds of a good one, laying it (and my frustration) aside, and maximizing my own potential independently of it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/09/20 05:47 PM |
| 61 | Fun fact really sad factIf these comments are to be believed, I can’t see why would anyone here see marriage as a goal at all. It just doesn’t seem logical. I understand HVM exist, but they’re not common, and there aren’t enough to go around to everyone. Going by this framework, the focus should be on the self and developing friendships, not actively dating. If someone does come along, use strategy to vet, but he likely won’t (because that takes effort, to pursue someone who is not showing interest in dating), so it sh… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/09/20 03:08 PM |
| 11 | Why "walk dates" are a thing on OLD and why they should be trashed every single time.My response is generally “Just a heads up that from a chemistry standpoint, I haven’t connected walking side by side, like I would on a date, so it does tend to have more of a platonic vibe. But I’m also looking for friends, so if you’re open to that as well, let’s do it!” The second they get a sense of 0 chance of their penis getting touched, boy do the plans change fast and what do you know, not that hard to plan a real date after all. Not that I’m going anymore after being lowballed (unless t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/09/20 12:27 PM |
| 5 | FDS ladies, how are you going to make sure your future/current son is a HVMGod I love this post and the comments. On behalf of the young girls who are dear to us, thank you for being such great examples for these boys, because this is where it all starts. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/09/20 01:15 AM |
| 23 | It’s always Dan’s on OLD 🤮🤮Because confidence. The confidence of men truly astounds me at times. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 11:06 PM |
| 57 | Why "walk dates" are a thing on OLD and why they should be trashed every single time.I gave it a go and, unless the walk happened after dinner or drinks when connection was already established, have not enjoyed these dates. Other reasons have already been established (cheap, low effort), but the main one for me is that I cannot form an initial connection with someone when we are walking side by side, intermittently looking at each other, and then sitting on a bench side by side (generally you aren’t going to find chairs in a park). There is a reason restaurants seat people acros… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 10:33 PM |
| 7 | Why do ex LVM bother you after you’ve blocked them? Like they HAD you and they HAD the opportunity to fix the issues and work it out.Human nature. The other day, I saw a woman was standing with her dog outside of a cafe. A man had a toddler who was curious about the dog, and wanted to pet the dog, but wasn’t ready. Every time the dad would bring him a little closer to the dog, the boy would move his hand away and back off. Obviously the dog owner has a life, so she’d start to leave, and then the boy would get upset, so out of compassion, she’d stop. Repeat this process of dad bringing boy to dog, boy not petting the dog, woma… | /r/askFDS | 13/09/20 05:03 PM |
| 1 | Got my first dating sub ban!So you were in disagreement with mom? Just curious, when you say the advice of older women, how old? Older than her? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 02:58 PM |
| 6 | Got my first dating sub ban!Lol at the bear trap line 😂😂 Of course, the rest of this resonates. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 09:33 PM |
| 5 | Got my first dating sub ban!Yeah, this is a good approach/wording to soften it. I’ll keep that in mind as well! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 07:50 PM |
| 9 | Got my first dating sub ban!You’re right, it’s so tough. There will always be pick-me’s. Even I have those moments. But I still envision a world where when men get fast sex, it’s understood by the woman that she’s driving with no seatbelt, sex is no relationship cincher, and she 100% should understand he’s not necessarily going to treat her well. All while leveling up to where she gets closer and closer to seeing that she deserves what she truly wants- if not a relationship, then at least dignity, respect for her sexual an… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 07:48 PM |
| 8 | Got my first dating sub ban!Fuck. I am so sorry it went south. I too am trying to figure out how to plant seeds without it becoming an explosion. The defensiveness reminds me of when people, who are “exes” of a certain religion I won’t name, present evidence contrary to the teachings, to people still in that church. For sure, I never talk about this stuff in front of men, unless I already know them to be HVM. Women who need male validation- no matter the quality of the male- I would suspect might performatively fight back … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 07:23 PM |
| -10 | If liberal feminism was a comment. They are so close to realising it but they just don't want toDownvote away but I’m not totally pissed about this. It’s disturbing but it sounds like he has a toxic part of him that he recognizes and is working on. ETA: to address comments below. he knows he’s a fuckup and not where he should be, he says as much. hopefully it’s a process that the guy is working on, and yes, sometimes people go public about what they’re working on. we do it here all the time. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/09/20 04:47 PM |
| 5 | My boyfriend called me out yesterday.Happy for you ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/09/20 04:36 PM |
| 13 | When people are used to walking all over youThese are the words in my heart and it fucking hurts. I haven’t figured out how to manage the pain of when they return between relationships, and recognizing I’m seen as nothing but a placeholder. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/09/20 04:25 PM |
| 5 | Why are all LVM addicted to sex?You’re on the right track. Even if he wanted help- which clearly he doesn’t- it isn’t your responsibility to fix him. Because of the abuse, I wouldn’t even stick around to offer support, cut him off and send compassion from a distance. I’m sorry you’ve been used as a vessel for someone else to dump their pain into with 0 reciprocation or consideration, but it’s no reflection on your worth. It’s clear you’re an empathetic person and believe me, while this guy did not value that, there are people … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 10:31 PM |
| 4 | Why are all LVM addicted to sex?Barring him being straight up sociopathic (uncommon) I believe it’s addiction (common). Addiction is feel-good stuff that covers up a problem and does harm in the process. This reminds me of a conversation I had with a dealer, who said that any client who gets angry with him because he can’t drop by to make a sale that night, has a drug problem, and he will sever ties. Sounds like this guy with sex. There are many, many men out there who feel a void due to a personal lack of power, and/or self-r… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 10:07 PM |
| 5 | Truth. We are not responsible for fixing or changing men!Why do I advocate for a two prong approach? Because I don’t have a lot of faith in grown men changing. We can start when they’re boys, but as far as the grown ones, especially over 40, you’re hard pressed for them to change their ways. “Stop abusing!” Why would they, when so much abuse is legal with 0 consequences and there is always a willing target? What incentive? In that case, it’s women then that do set the consequences. If grown men won’t evolve because we beg them to and it’s the right th… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 03:07 PM |
| 30 | Truth. We are not responsible for fixing or changing men!To be clear, the comment isn’t about people who do it, it’s about people who create a meme and encourage others to do it. I see it as dangerous messaging that perpetuates abuse (and at a certain point you have to own the fact that your ”advice” is hurting people, regardless of toxic perspectives- racism, homophobia, internalized misogyny- you were taught, and so yes, others are going to call it when they see it). And yet it’s so outrageous I have my doubts a woman even wrote it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 01:37 AM |
| 420 | Truth. We are not responsible for fixing or changing men!seriously, if these women are so altruistic, why not adopt a troubled foster child? or an abandoned cat or dog? and see what you can do there? why do they choose adult men? unless the person who owns this account is actually a man seeking fixing....that makes more sense..... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/09/20 07:56 PM |
| 19 | “Why men can’t - and shouldn’t- stop staring at women.” | so the Globe and Mail just publishes predators now?some thoughts: the assessment of the girl in the emerald blouse disgusts me. she’s wearing what she’s wearing because she likes that. she isn’t looking to demonstrate her mate-worthiness. why is the gaze so frowned upon? i’m not talking about a casual, appreciative glance in the direction of a woman, i’m talking about the constant, daily, out-of-control staring. because it’s indicative of a trait we don’t like- fickleness. what would it take for him to do a 180 and no longer be dependable, do so… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/20 03:27 AM |
| 3 | Always be ready to leave. As soon as you feel yourself having the scarcity mindset, remember you’re a queen and deserve peace.Ah, that’s another one I have trouble with, the “let back in” move. It’s very very hard for me to cut them but once I do, I just can’t bring them back (unless it’s immediate family). The trust is shot and it’s just not the same. I almost think they can sense this about me, as it’s not often that anyone wants to come back, because they know the ship sailed. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/20 01:28 AM |
| 4 | Always be ready to leave. As soon as you feel yourself having the scarcity mindset, remember you’re a queen and deserve peace.I don’t know, maybe certain types of people just get exhausted from constantly being on guard and never truly feeling safe with or trusting anyone. To me, it’s a chronic stressor. Maybe because I’ve done the thing where I cut out all the hurtful people, and was left with no one, then unsuccessfully trying to form new connections when I was hurt by the old ones, and for me that was hard from a survival/human connection standpoint. I do think there are people who need other people in their lives l… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/20 01:14 AM |
| 2 | Always be ready to leave. As soon as you feel yourself having the scarcity mindset, remember you’re a queen and deserve peace.I’m with her on that. I can’t be relaxed if I’m constantly on guard looking for red flags. I can’t believe in any of it from a romantic standpoint with this outlook. Yet I’ve sort of accepted that the fairy tale is over for me. The good feelings are all just brain chemicals, and the reason for partnering- if I do- is purely for practical purposes like logistics, added resources and the increased ease for satisfying human cravings. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/20 12:56 AM |
| 34 | Why are men so lazy and low energy?I could write an entire essay on this. It’s all about power. In a twisted way, making an effort (and admitting to themselves they must) for these guys is a further relinquishment of power, when they feel so powerless as it is. Even worse, when they cave and make the effort, and still don’t get the thing they want. bulletpoint 1, adjusting to the loss of power due to new wave of feminism (metoo, FDS, etc) and reacting with resentment or ambivalence (due to fear) instead of empathy/recognizing how… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/08/20 06:18 AM |
| 45 | FDS is an ExTrEmIsT subI can’t stand the guys who try to respond to posts of mine (I see a notification before they’re blocked by mods), bc every fuckin’ time it’s some violation of the 10 commandments of rational debate. The all time favorite is the false dichotomy (i.e. “if you are saying THIS thing, then it automatically means THAT thing that supports MY narrative!”- in the most recent case it was me stating that men would pay for sex if they really needed it....guy says, “oooh GOTCHA so SeX wOrK iS oK nOw? must be… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/08/20 05:48 PM |
| 6 | All compliments are not created equal.I just accept the compliment. The way I see it, in the particular moment, I’m making him feel content and fulfilled. I find men fickle, and know that this idea of me being perfect won’t last, so I enjoy the boost while it’s there. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/08/20 07:26 PM |
| 7 | Favorite ways to shut down unwanted male attention?Oh wow, that’s a good one, I’ll have to keep it in mind. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/08/20 07:23 PM |
| 14 | Girl please don'tThey can. If they “needed” it, they’d pay for it, like food. And most won’t. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/08/20 07:18 PM |
| 12 | He offered me Weed at work for sex!!!There are small hidden cameras you can buy off Amazon, I’d recommend it. Then you have evidence for the boss. Check state laws- I know mine allows one way recording. Plus, this wouldn’t be great for his reputation, should you decide you want to leave anyway and make it public. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/08/20 07:15 PM |
| 10 | Favorite ways to shut down unwanted male attention?I’m considering carrying around a whoopee cushion, since I can’t fart on cue. I’m kidding, but, you know, basic creatures need basic cues to remind them that you are, in fact, a human. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/08/20 07:12 PM |
| 2 | “And stuff”I just used your post as reference for a friend who was having a nearly identical conversation. I hope she comes to FDS, so on point, sis. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/07/20 04:34 AM |
| 82 | “And stuff”i love this shit so much. I dream of a world where all women respond in this way, and men either step up and lose their vulgarity or simply filter themselves out of the online dating pool. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/07/20 03:35 AM |
| 3 | I’ll just leave this herebetter look like Ronaldo if ur tryna get away with that ish | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/07/20 03:29 AM |
| 1 | Hey queens. Make some suggestions for me to be more productive in a fun way on my down time. Keep me busy.Do you have an Ipad? I recently got an Apple pencil and the app Procreate; you can draw anywhere and there’s no end to progress. the features on the app are seemingly limitless and I find it a therapeutic way to express what I can’t put into words/can’t make as palatable with words...plus since it’s all digital, it’s easy to do do-overs. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/07/20 09:16 PM |
| 5 | When LVM send unsolicited dick picsfucking hell sis, i needed this pic just 2 days ago! ah well, it’ll likely come in handy in 2 days time. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/20 01:48 AM |
| 32 | Who agrees?It was the only option she had at the time to level up 🤷♀️ But, he seemed like a nice man and also, he likely died first. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/20 08:28 PM |
| 2 | Thoughts on engagement etiquette?Likely you’ll do most of the work in planning the wedding, but carrying the children in your body and all that goes with that is a big one. And if men carried children, I can promise you they would never let women forget it and absolutely see this as justification for a greater contribution from their partner. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/07/20 09:14 PM |
| 7 | Some clownery I found in the wild on Insta. If you were in this situation, would you stay or not?The confidence of men. Truly. If I possessed the level of shameless confidence this man has in his pinky finger, I’d be slaying. That’s the only good thing I can say about him. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/07/20 09:35 PM |
| 4 | Guy accuses me of being potentially abusive for calling myself a firecracker in my bumble profile, another guy chimes in and recognizes me as an alt account, continues to wrongfully accuse me of potential abuse as well because I said I want men to fear me 😂😂I’ve been here and I get it but honestly, I couldn’t even read through so, just a gentle reminder to be mindful of how much emotional labor you devote to deaf ears belonging to someone who has nothing of value to offer you. (I understand that sometimes the messaging is really for the lurkers). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/07/20 09:09 PM |
| 9 | Imagine being such a pickme that you flex that you post your nudes for free and hating on girls who wanna get paidIf being a woman was a union, this would be crossing the picket line. Actually, can we form a union? Imagine the bargaining sessions. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/07/20 04:59 PM |
| 10 | Never fawn over men.What is this from? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 04:34 PM |
| 14 | LVM and their livesDitto on the taquitos. I don’t eat cookies, I never get the “late night slice”. Just one 7-11 taquito, to be slowly savored after a night out. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 04:33 PM |
| 8 | Harsh truthWow wow wow this is SO on point. It should be its own post. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 04:06 AM |
| 15 | Harsh truthIt depends on the guy. Like someone said below, some have a whole resume fleshed out in their heads. In the case of my ex, it was about a certain look (short, tiny body), being generally unchallenging in her opinions, and capable of/willing to make him babies. He doesn’t really care about hobbies, background or intelligence. If those factors are in place, all of the posturing about behaviors he talks a big game about not standing for (like the rigid standards he applied to me, or her having poor… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 03:39 AM |
| 45 | I miss physical intimacy so much that I cry over it. How do you all handle going without it?I struggle with this too, it has a name, “skin hunger” (I know that term sounds gross), and there is no substitute for it besides human to human contact (therapy, my cat or “me touching me” is not adequate). I don’t have family around to hug me and my friends, who are all partnered and thus can’t even comprehend life without touch, are sort of taken aback by my need for hugs like “omg are you OKAY?”, which makes me feel bad. It feels like needing food and so I go to lengths that I’m sure FDS’ers… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/07/20 04:39 PM |
| 2 | Pre-FDS me would have been chasing this loser LOL “ur really weird”Thanks! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/07/20 12:11 AM |
| 50 | Pre-FDS me would have been chasing this loser LOL “ur really weird”Can we get a gaslighting flair? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 04:59 PM |
| 3 | Why Are One Night Stands Being Sold to women as “Strong & Empowering” instead of “Risky & Reckless"?Your final two sentences made me tear up. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 01:48 PM |
| 3 | Why Are One Night Stands Being Sold to women as “Strong & Empowering” instead of “Risky & Reckless"?Again, instead of doubling down, read the handbook and our success stories for how we manage to find relationships that are healthy, how we filter out time wasting men, and how we contentedly go it alone until we do find someone who will engage in a healthy relationship. You’re bashing a strategy you haven’t put a drop of research into and it looks foolish. If you read it and you don’t like it, then this sub is not for you, and there are plenty of male dominated subs that welcome free lovin’ fem… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 04:24 AM |
| 5 | Why Are One Night Stands Being Sold to women as “Strong & Empowering” instead of “Risky & Reckless"?It’s not puritanical or about morality. It’s about the surface area of your mucus membranes that are more receptive to STDs and subsequent symptoms, your oxytocin spikes that cause you to bond, your higher risk of assault because you are not as strong as most men, how easy it is for them to pull the condom off without your knowledge, and the way your body changes after pregnancy. Which I can see you’re conveniently skipping over while focusing on our natural desires. Oh, except for the orgasm pa… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 03:57 AM |
| 4 | Why Are One Night Stands Being Sold to women as “Strong & Empowering” instead of “Risky & Reckless"?Um, I didn’t call you anything, or give you flair (I am not a mod) so, like I was saying above along the lines of flipping out at people because it’s instant grat, it’s worth examining whether a “feel good” action in the moment is beneficial in the big picture. Fwiw, if you reread you’ll see I said yes, the ONS is something you have the right to do....but it’s interesting that you bring up the subject of tearing down other women, because “all boats rise” (more benefit for women as a whole and ac… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 02:02 AM |
| 9 | Why Are One Night Stands Being Sold to women as “Strong & Empowering” instead of “Risky & Reckless"?You absolutely can have ONS, it isn’t illegal. What’s being communicated here is along the lines of, yes, you can also do too many drugs, super size your McD’s 4 times a week, or flip the fuck out on people who annoy you, all in the name of gratification and freedom. It doesn’t mean those are healthy habits, and the article explains why men stand to gain more from ONS than women, because male risk is lower. It sucks that they have an advantage over us in this realm, but that’s life. Men can in g… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/07/20 05:10 PM |
| 1 | Why Are One Night Stands Being Sold to women as “Strong & Empowering” instead of “Risky & Reckless"?can you fix the “or gain enough” link? interested in reading further. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/07/20 04:59 PM |
| 9 | Okay, what the actual fuckwhy do his teeth irritate me so much 😁😁😁🙄 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/07/20 04:14 AM |
| 103 | Must be under 5’5, fit, submissive, and stepmother to 4.Stepmother to five if you count his ass 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/07/20 04:05 AM |
| 8 | Sex without a condom ladies.. Seen a few of these posts recently😷🙅🏼♀️I wouldn’t say it’s officially anti bi men; what I mean is when they come up in the comments, in my experience the commentary has always been negative. Yes to your points on straight men, same experience. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/07/20 06:41 PM |
| 10 | What do you think of snooping partner's phone?If you feel the strong pull to do it, trust isn’t there, bad feelings are, and if you don’t find what you’re looking for...the distrust and bad feelings will be there regardless, and you’ll spiral, using up emotional labor continuing to dig. It’s better to just talk it out to feel more at ease. If that doesn’t put you at ease, end the relationship. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/07/20 06:11 PM |
| 38 | Sex without a condom ladies.. Seen a few of these posts recently😷🙅🏼♀️It’s so wild to me that the women I have hooked up with have been the most responsible, especially since woman to woman transmission is the lowest risk. One woman wanted me to put a condom on a strap on (it was clean) and while to some that is an over abundance of caution, she was respecting what felt right for her sexual health, which made me like her even more. This sub craps on bi men a lot, but in my experience, for whatever reason they have been next best in that they’ve always insisted on … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/07/20 06:03 PM |
| 48 | Yas! 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻 Don't settle for a man that doesn't make you feel like a queen!It’s true. It’s like the moment other men notice me, that’s when the guy snaps to attention. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/07/20 03:48 PM |
| 115 | Scrote pretty much ignores a date and then texts oh hey how are you! out of no where. #menactdumbtogetawaywithshitI think guys like this see planning a date as too much of a relinquishment of power. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/07/20 03:44 PM |
| 42 | Dating in college - a waste of time?I would say, if you meet someone great who’s got it together, be open to it. There are some guys who have it together at that age and you’d be lucky to find one to skip all the dating process bullshit later. Be his friend and know his family first, so you know what you’re getting into before you get attached. I would not seek a partner, however. Don’t waste too much time dating around, prioritize your self-development. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/07/20 03:22 PM |
| 37 | Wanted to share another gem from my short stint on tinderThis isn’t even about sex. It’s about power. The sad part is that there are women out there who haven’t found their own power who will throw their sexual risks under the bus and actually consider letting that baked potato shaped facial hair into the vicinity of their vag. The Confidence of Men. Truly. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/07/20 02:33 AM |
| 155 | Just wanted to say, I’ve got your back.Thanks for doing that. With all the pick-me’s out there, sometimes I feel like I’m the only one out there bringing these guys down to earth. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/07/20 02:29 AM |
| 23 | I genuinely think I’m too afraid to keep dating menI can empathize as well. I can tell early on whether the guy gives a shit about me in terms of who I am as a person, and generally the answer is, when it comes to OLD, “he doesn’t”. His mind is on when the sex is happening (without having first examined the additional risks I take on of potential assault/STD vulnerable surface area/oxytocin bonding/lower chance of orgasm), not getting to know me. So, I match the energy, and don’t care about him either, and use him as a slump buster to deal with … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/06/20 03:52 AM |
| 20 | "Straight white men are oppressed too 😔" on a post about black lives matter and being against women getting raped.Notice they weren’t even addressing rapes, until women did (and then wanted to be a part of the conversation), you’re welcome. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/06/20 10:41 PM |
| 14 | Two brothers see a woman paying for gas with pennies, and give her money from their pockets. They had no idea that her husband had just died and she was struggling.I’m bawling. That is so heartwarming. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/06/20 03:35 AM |
| 9 | Do HVM actually want different things than LVM?I agree with what is said here. We can’t control our desires, we can only control what we do about them. i.e. a dessert of a whole bottle of wine and 6 cupcakes is tempting to a part of my brain, but I’m not actually doing it because duh. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/20 04:28 PM |
| 83 | IckIt’s almost as if they cannot wrap their heads around the idea that more and more women are completely content with opting out if need be. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/20 04:25 PM |
| 0 | Why do some HVM marry “shallow” girls?Maybe she doesn’t stand up for herself and does whatever the hell he wants. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/05/20 06:22 PM |
| 115 | Guy says gf is selfish because she wants a breast reduction due to back pain...How, How, How. How do men like this get partners. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/20 02:07 PM |
| 10 | Feeling the whole “Lord grant me the confidence of a mediocre man” today.willing to give 100% for a few weeks until someone gets attached so he can drop down to that 15% comfortably later lol. Ex👏🏻act👏🏻ly👏🏻 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/20 01:46 PM |
| 41 | Feeling the whole “Lord grant me the confidence of a mediocre man” today.I was actually thinking about this level of confidence. A guy I know (not someone I dated) is borderline obese, a smoker, drinks every night, eats garbage, barely works, barely moves much less gets any exercise, has no direction, does nothing in the way of self- improvement, and is broke. And he goes on to tell me about how he thinks he’s “really ready to give 100% to someone”. I had to suppress a laugh because I was just so incredulous that this man- who is willing to give maybe 15% to himself-… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/20 04:08 AM |
| 18 | Boys after you treat them how they treat youBecause they (generally) don’t mind being used for sex. It’s a myopia thing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/20 08:25 PM |
| 3 | Tiger KingAs far as the daughters, if I could’ve fudged that will, I would’ve done better by them, no matter what he wanted and no matter they said about me. Yeah they said shitty things about Carole, but money talks- or in this case, would’ve shut people up- and if she had done better for them, it would’ve gone better for her. I have no idea where they were, who actually lives there, if the mom remarried a new wealthy guy, who knows. It wasn’t clarified. While it’s more nuanced for me with the mom, who c… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/04/20 06:11 PM |
| 1 | Tiger KingEven if they do volunteer, I think some form of compensation is in order. People volunteer for a lot of things; just because you can get away with 0 compensation doesn’t mean you should, especially if working on holidays. They show her living space- how does she afford all that? Even if it’s coming from the late husband (since the daughters got a raw deal due to will fudging, then likely she got most of it), if I see that kind of lifestyle when one is running a nonprofit- no matter who you are o… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/04/20 01:27 PM |
| 19 | Tiger KingI did like Saff as well. That line about how this was supposed to be about the animals, and yet they were the losers in the whole thing, really struck me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/04/20 03:37 AM |
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