Stay-at-Home Moms: Worth a $122,732 Salary. (If she has extensive business experience, an MBA, and a PhD in Psychology...)

swagohome · 2009-05-10T15:45:12+00:00

I appreciate the fact that the work of a full-time parent is difficult. It is entirely valid to point out that it requires many more than 40 hours a week of work (presuming that not all of the kids are in school or daycare all day during the week), work on weekend and nights, and usually no vacation time.

But - I do have a problem with the severe over-valuation (in monetary terms) of the work. This year Salary.com calculated that a stay-at-home mom (no mention of a stay-at-home dad) would earn a $122,732 salary if she were being paid for her hours working as a laundry machine operator, janitor, van driver, housekeeper, computer operator, cook, daycare center teacher, facilities manager, psychologist, and chief executive officer. (It would be $76,184 at 40 hours per week, but they estimate a whopping 56 hours overtime - that is, 96 hours per week total.)

A number of problems with this.. First of all, a stay-at-home parent presumably has a full-time working spouse who is paying for all of the family's expenses. Most regular jobs don't pay you a salary and pay for every one of your personal expenses (housing, food, clothing, entertainment, whatever else you feel like buying). So perhaps we should calculate and deduct that.

Secondly: Some of these hours - I'm not sure how many - are being calculated at the hourly pay of a daycare center teacher, facilities manager, psychologist, and chief executive officer. I'm not sure what kind of background the first two I mentioned required, but presumably there's something. But a psychologist? In most states you have to be licensed to practice psychology, and that usually requires at least a Masters if not a PhD, and probably some years of training. CEOs usually have an MBA.. I'm not sure how big of a company they figured in their calculations, but usually there's also some requirement in the way of experience, business skill, etc. So it strikes me as fairly dishonest to say that a stay-at-home parent is "earning" the pay of a psychologist or CEO just because, on a superficial comparison, some of what they do bears a bit of similarity to what those well-trained, well-educated professionals do.

Third: There are people who hire nannies to do many of the things that a stay-at-home parent would do - taking care of the kids, preparing meals, cleaning, transportation, laundry, etc. It is no surprise that the average salary for a live-in nanny is nowhere near $120k/year. Because of course it's cheaper when you have one person regularly hired to do many things rather than hiring out to fifteen different services. Now probably most nannies don't work 96 hours per week, but they do often work more than 40. The salary for a live-in nanny depends very much on location and experience. In Manhattan an experienced live-in nanny might pull in upwards of $60-70k per year. But with less experience, and in less pricey areas, something like $35k/year is pretty normal.

Fourth: 96 hours? Really? So, assuming the stay-at-home parent sleeps 8 hours per night, that means s/he is working 14 hours per day, 7 days a week, and has a grand total of 2 hours per day of personal time? Not likely. Sure, the parent with a new-born is going to be putting in many more hours - but it's not 14 hours of straight work. Those things sleep a lot. As far as I know, most parents don't spend every minute of the day (except for those two hours of free time) with their young children. They have them napping, or watching tv, or playing with toys for a significant chunk of the day. Once school starts up, there's a good 8 hours of the day in there. In any case, whatever "parenting time" is being counted is not solely child-related work; personal work is mixed in there. The parent has his/her own laundry to wash, dishes to clean, housework to do - it's not only for the kids.

The most revealing calculation, I think, would be to think of a stay-at-home parent's "equivalent salary" as being about what a live-in nanny would make. True, the parent probably does more than a live-in nanny would - but then, the nanny usually takes care of much of the unpleasant stuff (cleaning up messes, etc.). And although many of a live-in nanny's living expenses are paid for, employers don't also pay for the nanny's entertainment, jewelry, or unnecessary personal expenses. That's what the salary is for. Whereas the spouse of the stay-at-home parent typically pays for every expense. So really, the stay-at-home parent probably comes out pretty well ahead of the live-in nanny in most cases.

manojar · 2009-05-10T15:34:02+00:00

So, underemployed dads are entitled to the rest of the amount they are "worth"? Are only American citizens eligible for this or is it worldwide?

BinaryShadow · 2009-05-10T16:22:23+00:00

Fine. Take those over-inflated duties and give yourself a salary. Let's look at a work-from-outside-the-home dad.

Let's say his salary is 50k/year doing 40 hours a week of work. He comes home to his "second job." Computer technician, car mechanic, errand runner are some of the jobs he does by himself (if we're going to generalize, let's do it both ways shall we). Since he's working past his 40 hours, all this is overtime.

And do you expect a woman to do all her "jobs" without any help from the husband? He'll most likely be chipping in with the childkeeping, laundry, cleaning, etc. so shouldn't he get some of that overinflated money?

I tell you one thing: If I get married to a woman who stays at home, and if this government ever starts paying her with my tax money to drop the kids off at school, I will absolutely refuse to do any work outside my job. I will work my job, come home and expect food on the table, will play with the kids until I'm bored and then the wife will take over, and tend to my hobbies undisturbed for the rest of the evening. Sounds pretty sexist and horrible, doesn't it? Well, most guys put up with such shit at their jobs during the day so why should it be any different for a mom's "job?"

2009-05-10T15:28:51+00:00

They didn't add the portion that a prostitute makes...assuming that the wife puts out.

2009-05-10T21:02:24+00:00

Parenting is NOT a job. It's a lifestyle choice. Nobody forces one to become a parent and it is in no way necessary to lead a perfectly normal life. I personally enjoy my womanizing ways, but I don't ask to get paid as a gigolo. I realize, in turn, that this is also a lifestyle choice.

kanuk876 · 2009-05-10T15:57:20+00:00

If stay-at-home parents are paid $122,732, then they must also be eligible for training, a regular performance review, discipline, attend meetings, and may be fired for unsatisfactory or criminal behaviour while on the job.

To extend the idea of their performance review: all children undergo a psychological evaluation, and any child with a psychological problem is investigated. The parent would have to explain what the psychological problem is, how the child acquired it, and what steps the parent is taking to address the issue and promote healing.

It would be interesting to see the parents of circumcised boys squirm when their son's PTSD is revealed.

AnnArchist · 2009-05-11T01:55:00+00:00

ya that numbers a bunch of bullshit

2009-05-12T16:19:13+00:00

The point I like ot make here is: you're work is worth what people are willing to pay for it. It's a basic tenant of free market economics.

A friend of mine is a teacher for the mentally disabled (not just developmental disorders, but severe psychological problems). She deals with 10 of these kids year round and all of the associated testing. I addition to her teachig cerdentials, she has a masters in psychology. Her qualifications are much higher than your stereotypical stay at home mom, and working with some of her kids qualifies as hazardous duty. She makes $45K/year after 5 years.

These valuations are crazy, they are every year.

Title	Stay-at-Home Moms: Worth a $122,732 Salary. (If she has extensive business experience, an MBA, and a PhD in Psychology...)
Author	swagohome
Upvotes	22
Comments	14
Date	May 10, 2009 3:18 PM UTC (17 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/8jc05/stayathome_moms_worth_a_122732_salary_if_she_has/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/stay-at-home-moms-worth-a-122732-salary-if-she-has.1054008 https://theredarchive.com/post/1054008

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