Yes I know, it's AvfM and they can be radical and aggressive sometimes, but this is not like that at all. The description of how men 99% of the time are being starved for touch and intimacy, except when having sex, is spot on and touching (as the reactions of the women in the story make clear).
Personal thought: would be part of the solution if men touched and hugged each other more? Part. But first: when it feels like 'we're left out by women anyway, so let's comfort each other', it doesn't work, at least not for me. It would be like POC not being allowed to come close to whites. And then: being physically close to women for me has something special above being close to men, though I don't abhor the latter.
https://avoiceformen.com/featured/more-than-an-orgasm/
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You've got a point that there's a bit too much of a focus on sex at the expense of sensuality.
Don't get me wrong, sex is great, nothing wrong with wanting it etc. but romantic intimacy is more than just sex. It's cuddles, kisses, holding hands, dancing, a hand on her waist, a look in the eyes... that sorta thing. Like you say, when people think that any of those things necessarily have to lead to sex every single time, then that will put too much pressure on both parties.
Also, the people who complain about "locker room talk" have a point when they say that sex is often talked about in a strange, vulgar way that seems intended to gross out people, one-up people and brag. I need to specify that the douchey fratbro stereotype, at least in my experience, is greatly exaggerated - there are such people, but they seem to be a small but loud and annoying minority. And this kind of talk is quite prominent in pop culture and media.
The problem with the people complaining most vocally about locker room talk is that they fail to produce alternative models for how men can talk about sex. Sometimes such people almost seem more interested in making straight men stop seeing women in a sexual light at all, which is not gonna happen (just like gay men are attracted to men and lesbians are attracted to women, straight men are attracted to women... not all of them, but a subset of them.)
I think it's important to focus on sensuality because IMO sexuality without sensuality is just "banging, smashing, slaying, scoring". Maybe it's just a personal gripe or preference, but I've always found that to be a weird way to think of sex. Not that it needs to be rose petals, candles and Marvin Gaye records every time, of course. I dunno.
Despite the sexual revolution I think sex is still a taboo in areas where it matters. I'd like to just be able to talk to women about sex, what they like in bed etc. without it potentially coming off as some low level crime. People don't need to answer if they don't feel comfortable talking about it, but it'd be nice if it felt like less of a minefield to bring up. Oh well.
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