Ah yes, sex; the thing our species seems to be one of the best and worst at. The thing that is done for procreation and sport, also used to determine personal relationship status's and one of the same reasons said relationship status might change. It is the thing we are all created from and also the thing that brings so many so much shame.

As men we have a sexual organ that is both involuntary and reactionary in nature. From the moment we are in the womb we have erections, erections themselves are a natural occurrence within the male form. In fact the majority of male erections are not a result of sexual stimulus or arousal but instead a regulatory body function to maintain a healthy penis.

It would seem odd however, that this sexual organ that can become erect more often than not from non sexual stimulus is shamed so much for it. As many men will agree and understand, the mere presence of an erection does not dictate arousal but the presence of an erection on them may itself trigger arousal.

Men have witnessed this countless times, at an inopportune moment an erection will form. That sudden realization, that subsequent physical response shooting through the male nervous system becomes something that heightens the senses of that region. One who has never witnessed this could relate with the sudden feeling of an itch on their person. Suddenly that region isn't the only part that itches on the body, now other areas suddenly require a scratch.

This is the dilemma most men face in their lives. An unwanted erection brings focus to that unwanted erection, the person can either succumb to the biological response to indulge in said response or fight it in hopes the body will tense up enough to make it flaccid again.

I find it curious that since the beginning of our existence men have had to deal with this. When we lived in caves and possibly didn't even wear a loin cloth, to the time of today with form fitting clothes. Unwanted or even purposeful erections can and do happen multiple times a day and only gradually decrease with age. So how did our society form to suggest/mandate that a male erection is obscene? Why does society believe the only instance a man could have an erection is if said man is aroused?

I have 2 boys I'm raising, them having an erection is just normal at this point. After changing so many diapers, giving so many baths I can no longer view an erection as anything relating to sexual unless it is in a sexual nature. As a grown man I've come to realize that erections themselves are not a signal of arousal, context matters.

I hope at some point in our future that more of society understands the male sexual organ enough to have compassion and sympathy towards unwanted erections. That puberty doesn't force young men into awkward situations where anxiety and fear keep them from standing up in class. That commingled showers in school don't have them cowering in fear if "it" happening. Most importantly that men do not feel shame for a biological response that they themselves have 0 control over.

Yet where do we begin? How do we illicit change of such profound confrontation to what is perceived today? Would better education for our young men do the most good? In school they never mentioned involuntary nor nocturnal erections, admittedly this was over 30 years ago for me. I've started at home with my boys, trying to downplay erections as just a natural thing as much as possible as not to shame them for it. At 6 years old my youngest and I had a honest conversation when he asked "why does my penis get big and hurt?"