For a long time on the internet, there has been a lot of people ridiculing nice guy syndrome. This has been going on for several years. Nice guy syndrome is pretty much an overly nice or passive guy who struggles to get girls and is hypersensitive (often to the point of berserk button rage) to being friendzoned, often concluding that women only like jerks.

Now here's the thing: I doubt that many nice guys are hypersensitive to being friendzoned. A nice guy used to be defined as an overly nice, passive pushover guy who women don't find attractive for that reason and who gets exploited by others. Now it's defined as a guy like that who also is hypersensitive to the friendzone, often concluding women only like jerks.

I doubt most overly nice, unassertive, attentive men who act super nice will act hypersensitive to being friendzoned. In fact, I'd say only 1% get hostile towards being friendzoned, but social media loves to emphasize the 1% while sweeping the 99% under the rug.

Many people say that nice guys have ulterior motives, that they are only acting nice and attentive just to get a relationship or just to get laid. This is said about nice guys so often that it is labeled common knowledge, but it's never been proven. Is there any proof of this? Did people survey a bunch of these guys and they all said that was their motive, or do people just make assumptions about their motive? Just because people say nice guys have an ulterior motive, doesn't mean they do. I haven't seen any actual proof that they only act nice to get laid. Sure, they get hypersensitive to friendzoning, but that doesn't mean they only were nice to get laid. For all i know, it could be a lot of these guys perhaps are just socially awkward men who genuinely were trying to be nice but go berserk over being friendzoned because they take it personally and see it as a personal attack that she might hate them. If they're being nice just to get laid, that implies they assume women are gonna sleep with them if they act nice. If that's the case, why do they assume women are attracted to jerks, and then still resort to their typical nice behavior (up until the fateful friendzone) if they decided that it's cockblocking them? But it's inconclusive what these men's intentions and motives are anyways. It could perhaps way from person to person for all i know.

I already know the reason why many nice guy syndrome guys assume women only like jerks. Studies have shown that school bullies have more sexual partners, lose their virginity early, have more dating partners and are popular among their peers. Studies have also shown that physically aggressive men have more sex partners (and the more physically violent, the higher the number of sex partners). The study confirms that women often are attracted to physically aggressive men for short-term relationships. Studies have also shown that women are attracted to psychopaths and narcissists. Studies have also shown that women are not attracted to nice or attentive men, but men are attracted to nice or attentive women. Women might find a man attractive when he's nice, but when he's excessively nice, her cavewoman instincts suggests he's not a good hunter-gatherer, and that he is, in turn, unattractive. This is why bullies have more sexual partners and dating partners and are popular among their peers. In fact, studies show that adult virgins are more likely to have been bullied, socially withdrawn and rejected by their peers in childhood. This often continues in their teenage years. Many women might chase after hypermasculine men, expecting them to protect them, but in reality, while many of these men choose to protect women, many of them might attack women, especially their significant other or wife. Studies have shown that highly masculine men not only are more physically aggressive in general, but are more likely to be violent towards their girlfriend/wife. Rapists also tend to be very hypermasculine, and studies have consistently shown that rapists (rapists typically are hostilely sexist towards women) typically have far more sex partners than most men, have more dating partners, lose their virginity early, and have their first date early. In a sample of hypermasculine young men, these men were typically misogynistic (i.e.: hostile sexism), and compared to normative men in the sample, these men were had way more sex partners, more one night stands, and less monogamy and emotional intimacy, and were more likely to commit intimate partner violence or sexual assault/rape, were more likely to be diagnosed with an STD, and were more likely to impregnate a woman.

So when nice guys say women like jerks, they're right to an extent. Hypermasculine men and men who act violent or who bully others often attract women and become promiscuous. Hypermasculine behaviors are attractive to women. This doesn't mean that if you're nice, women won't like you, but being excessively nice is subconsciously a turn-off to women. Another good example of this is how it's a turn-off to women to ask if you can kiss her or feel her breasts. Women are attracted to hypermasculinity (although not to the degree necessarily where she wants to be abused or raped or anything before somebody accuses me of suggesting so). This is what leads to nice guys concluding that women like jerks. These kinds of men are the type who women are attracted to: macho men. These kinds of men are more likely to engage in bullying, rape/sexual assault, intimate partner violence, or crimes/violence in general.

The reason nice guys get friendzoned is NOT because he's "not that nice". I'm sure even overly nice men who don't mind being friendzoned still get friendzoned just as much. They get friendzoned because although being nice isn't a turnoff, being excessively nice is, and many of these guys also might start everything off platonically, which leads to an inevitable friendzone (unless they both gradually started to like each other simultaneously and spontaneously, a phenomenon that occurs more in high school than afterward).

But I bet that the vast majority of overly nice, overly attentive men don't mind being friendzoned that much. Social media always emphasizes the 1% who do. This is just like how they emphasize the rare misogynist who is a virgin who can't get laid. Studies show that misogynistic (hostilely sexist) men typically have more sex partners, not less. It's rare for them to be virgins, and rapists are often hostilely sexist, and they often have more sex partners/dating partners and have their first date or sexual experience early. Hardly ever are rapists virgins. In fact, it pretty much never happens. Virgins hardly ever are misogynists as far as I know, but social media emphasizes the rare misogynists who cannot get laid or who are virgins because virgin men are an easy target for ridicule, macho chick magnet men are the opposite, typically being seen as successful men.

But subs like r/niceguys are stupid. Many of these text message conversations I see on there show that same damn thing every single time. A guy sends "hi", then another "hi" hours later, she responds with "sorry i'm not interested" and then he threatens to rape and kill her and says "i was just trying to be nice". It shows the same thing over and over, and many of these guys say things that are blatantly satirical. I won't be surprised if at least HALF of these text message conversations are fake and made up (e.g.: they hired a friend to pose as a guy with nice guy syndrome for karma points). Some of these guys might not even have nice guy syndrome to begin with. When he says "I was just trying to be nice", it could be he meant "I was just saying hi or trying to start a conversation. Why are you ignoring me?". We can't know for sure that he meant "I'm a nice guy and you probably only like jerks". Some of these guys might not have nice guy syndrome to begin with. There's a lot of ambiguity here. Not to mention that some of them didn't mention they were being nice and just simply got mad at her for rejecting him. Any guy, even a bad boy or alpha male or "stud", could be the type of who insults a woman for rejection. In fact, I'd say many hypermasculine, promiscuous men (the usual misogynists, the type who get laid regularly) would perhaps react that way to rejection because these kinds of men are hypersensitive to rejection and sleep around with lots of women because they believe they need to be as promiscuous as possible to be successful. This is why subreddits like r/niceguys, r/justneckbeardthings, and r/IncelTear are stupid. They just need to find a group of people to ridicule for an ego boost and they pick these kind of guys because they're an easy target. And these subs are all just karmawhore subs at this point. Karmawhoring is only cool when you just joined Reddit and need a little karma to post on certain subs (as long as you use karmawhoring just by typing on normal subs not shitty mock subs like r/niceguys).

I think the only reason the Internet targets nice guy syndrome guys is because these kinds of men struggle to attract women, and men who cannot attract women are heavily stigmatized, so they see these guys as an easy target and people online need to find someone they can ridicule for an ego boost. Many people who target nice guy syndrome guys might not admit this, but it's all at least subconscious.

Am I saying that nice guy syndrome guys have to go berserk over being friendzoned? No. I never said that nor do I have nice guy syndrome, but I know why they conclude women only like jerks and I really doubt that most nice guys have nice guy syndrome or go berserk over being friendzoned, so it's time to stop emphasizing the 1%. At this point, any guy who is super nice is seen as creepy by the Internet and laughed at for asking out any woman.

The only people who I see as "creepy" are those "look at me feminists I'm one of the good men" type of male feminists and white knights you see online, particularly on r/TwoXChromosomes. The type of men who blindly defend anything women do and will call a man misogynistic and a potential rapist if he's depressed because he got rejected by every woman he's asked out even if he is NOT expressing anger at women. The type of man who just types generic feminist opinions online or acts misandrist online in a feministic manner. I doubt these white knight guys are saying these things to get laid (and if they are, this is clearly projection because these men appear everything on r/niceguys and that sub accuses nice guys of only being nice to get laid) but I won't be surprised if they're virtue signaling subconsciously or trying to get upvotes or admiration from society at large because society is pro-feminist. These "look at me feminists I'm one of the good men" type of men are everywhere on subs like r/niceguys, r/justneckbeardthings, and r/IncelTear. And they're the reason why many people don't trust male feminists. They're some of the creepiest men I've seen, and I won't be surprised if a few are closet misogynists. It's like the homophobe who is secretly gay.

I don't say that I agree with everything nice guy syndrome guys say, but hardly any nice guys have nice guy syndrome. Social media emphasizes the rare ones who do, and any guy who acts nice is now called a simp. If I ever am caught using that word, I'm using it to describe a "look at feminists I'm a good man" guy.

But many of the guys featured on r/niceguys don’t necessarily have nice guy syndrome. Some of them merely got upset about a rejection without labeling themself nice. Some labeled themself nice but perhaps just mean “someone who’s nice” and were saying it for reasons that have nothing to do with hypersensitivity to the friend zone. It just depends.