I’ve(22f) been with my partner(25m) around two years. We are now long distance which has made it difficult but we were planning to move in together this summer. We talked about engagement sometime soon and then marriage after as we both want that .

But then the distance , coupled with some issues he was going through with his family and my failures in being as present as I should have been as well as poor communication led to issues. We decided to stop sex for the time being for various reasons on both of our sides. We’ve talked about our issues, both have been trying to improve communication and be there for the other. We’ve both decided we want to make the relationship work. He’s a great guy, very respectful and we have the same values and desires for our marriage/family. He does work a lot so sometimes it can be difficult to get ahold of him, but I also admire his ambition.

But then we sorta tried to make out and do some touching when I was with him. And he finally told me he couldn’t get aroused by me because he didn’t feel “emotionally close”. He also suffers from trauma so I know that plays a role. Sex is very much an emotional thing for him. He said that he wasn’t feeling a desire to be more intimate with me(more intimate than cuddling and light kisses).

However, it hurts so much. I want him to desire me. I want to ask if we can try some sexting or sending some pictures even though it’s not really his thing plus it doesn’t replace sex. However, it’s eating at me and making me feel far from him. Should I ask? I’ve also noticed that since our visit, I’m much less horny.

Sometimes, I’m just tempted to end it and even just seek out something casual even though it goes against my views of sex and what I actually want. I’m moving soon so I’m not looking at dating and dealing with distance again.