PREMISE

The phrase, "It's okay," has become the go-to saying to anyone who is struggling, even when the struggle is because of their own poor life choices. The phrase is usually appended by, "God loves you just as you are."

It's no secret that the world uses God's love as an excuse to justify poor life choices.

  • Overweight? It's okay, God loves you just as you are. You don't need to lose weight. Be proud of your body!

  • Unable to engage in social situations and make friends? It's okay, God loves you even if they don't. You don't need them, just him. No need to improve your social skills.

  • Struggling to financially provide for your family? It's okay, God loves you just as you are. Even the apostles were poor, so you keep on playing those video games all day instead of working!

MYTH: God loves you just as you are.

FACT: God loves you, despite the way you are.

EXAMPLE

Let's start with body image issues. I heard someone share recently about her struggle. She was afraid that her husband wouldn't love her anymore because she's getting older and gaining weight. She had made poor life choices that put her in a bad position, just as I had earlier in my marriage.

Good thing mainstream churchianity was there to support her! She learned that "God loves me just the way I am" and "I am beautiful, no matter what they say." They're in the Bible. Look it up. <searches> Oh wait, that's actually a Christina Aguilera song, not a Song of Solomon.

The one that does often gets quoted is: "I am fearfully and wonderfully made." And that's true! When God knit you together in your mother's womb (i.e. the previous verse), you were fearfully and wonderfully made. But he's not the one who made you fat and unattractive. You did that after he made you. Just as with Adam and Eve at creation, God can make something good, but we have the power to screw it up.

BIBLICAL

The whole "God loves me just as I am" thing is a sham - especially if you're sharing it with non-Christians. God hates sin. Psalm 11:5 says plainly, "The Lord tests the righteous, but his soul hates the wicked." Psalm 5:5 - "The boastful shall not stand before your eyes; you hate all evildoers." Proverbs 8:13 extends this to us: "The fear of the Lord is hatred of evil." No, it's not a "love-hate relationship" with God. That's awkward human terminology to rationalize clinging onto destructive ties in our lives.

The Bible says that "God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Notice the tonality here.

  • Many people interpret this to say: God loves all of me, including my sin, which is an unbiblical conclusion.

  • The actual tone and context of the passage reads more like: Even though we were sinners and God hates sin, he loved us enough to do something to eradicate those parts of us so that we could be in fellowship with him again.

The primary function of salvation is sanctification, not a "free ticket to heaven," as some claim. The fact that God will not allow sin in heaven is very telling that he does not embrace our sinfulness, but wants it gone.

The irony, of course, is that the way we get "pruned" of our sin (per John 15) is not by trying to prune ourselves (per Galatians 3:3), but by "abiding in Him" (John 15), which the same author later says in 1 John 2:6 defines as "walking as He walked" - i.e. live our lives the same way Jesus lived. How do we do that? The three greats I've often shared before: (1) Love God, greatest command; (2) Love Others, second greatest command; (3) Make Disciples, great commission.

REBUTTAL

Now, I'm sure some people will want to argue semantics. "I am a sinner. God still loves me." That's dodging the point. You can't knowingly continue to sin without repentance and expect anything other than God's wrath. Hebrews 10:26-31 is clear on that - "For if we go on sinning deliberately after receiving the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins, but a fearful expectation of judgment, and a fury of fire that will consume the adversaries." Sure, you may slip up while being continually repentant, as sanctification won't be complete in this life ... but on the bigger picture: Do you really want to play the semantics game when that kind of judgment is on the line?

CONCLUSION

"It's okay, God loves you" is not an excuse for failing to change your lifestyle and behaviors. If you're a glutton, learn to control your diet (I know that's one I struggle with, which is why I run/bike so doggone much!). If you have no friends, learn some social skills and get out there. "I'm more of an introvert, so I don't have to," is not an excuse for failing to build the relationships that are necessary to advance the Gospel in your sphere of life. If you're financially struggling, get off the TV and video games and get a second job, or find a way to improve the career path you're already on. I had one friend who was in a tough spot working as a financial advisor. He was pulling 6-figures, but still massively in debt. He got his spending worked out to stop new debt, but the interest on the old debt was still killing him. Know what he did? He got a job working third shift at Steak 'n Shake for a year making $8/hr - an embarrassingly low wage for him - to make up the extra cash to pay down the debt. His wife was a school teacher and she actually got a summer job to supplement and help.

Whatever it takes, stop making the "God loves me just as I am" excuse and go do what you need to do, prioritizing first God's Work of building His Kingdom.