Now I’ve always been naturally feminine for the most part. And I mean that outside of typical girly things.

But one thing I struggle with is receiving. I don’t like being a burden to others especially if it’s something I failed to do at the right time. For example I keep delaying the whole process of getting my driver’s license. I just don’t prioritize it enough even though I want to be able to drive and that put a lot of guilt and shame on me so I end up taking the bus or Uber (which takes a lot of money out of my pocket) to go wherever I want.

Sometimes I even feel like I don’t deserve somethings offered to me and I rarely ask for help because I don’t want to inconvenience someone especially if they’re already doing something.

I also feel a lot of guilt receiving because I can get so caught up in what I’m doing and doing things for myself, I hardly reach out and give to others.

It’s funny how you think you’re being self less for looking out for yourself when you’re actually being selfish.