Feeling like I've run out and burned out of date activities with my LTR after 6 months?

refusewool · 2017-08-31T12:34:06+00:00

You are trying your hardest to keep her entertained and happy. And for what? Sex? How Nice of you. Do yourself a favour and pick up NMMNG.

CD_Johanna · 2017-08-31T11:24:49+00:00

You've shot yourself in the foot...

You did too much too soon and now when you recover, she's going to say you've changed, how you used to be so fun bla bla bla. And btw, why were you putting in so much effort? What's she done/planned for you two?

setsuna0 · 2017-08-31T20:17:38+00:00

Damn nigga you did more in 6 months than I did in 2 years lol sheesh. I say slow it down. What you're doing is cool. But break it down into seasonal occasions. Or when you feel she really deserves it.

Mr-Ed209 · 2017-08-31T13:23:27+00:00

You need to experience/enjoy how treating a girl 'badly' makes them treat you better. What you're doing is nice guy mentality. Trying to keep her around by being her fun source, let me guess your paying for dinners on the regular as well.

Treat this as if you have put in your 'courting' effort and tone shit down to stuff you can sustain and enjoy. My last LTR, the best times were just chilling drinking wine in bed, watching crap tv murder mystery shows and having sex. Girls infinitely like dudes they're banging regularly than ones who take them out to do random shit in town. Yes there's a balance in a LTR but you seem as though you're far on the wrong side of it. The stuff you do with her should also be just an extension of the shit you want to do yourself anyway.

brideboy · 2017-08-31T16:59:36+00:00

Tell her youll do things once a month instead of every single weekend. She should understand and if she doesnt, she no longer fits into your life.

Youve got a responsibility to yourself to fulfill your needs and get things done that you want to get done. And if having some alone time is what you want the go for it.

Simply put: just ask her howd she feel about the change from every weekend to once every few weekends. If she has a negative reaction let her talk it out and try to empathize with her, put yourself in her shoes.

If she has a positive reaction do the same as above.

Your goal is to state what you want in the calmest, most compassionate way. To preserve her feelings and still get what you want. To be unapologetic, yet kind on thw changing conditions of the relationship.

She might try to negotiate. She might try to withdraw sex or withdraw affection. Be aware that these are red flags and you should get out fast.

Other than that use your best judgement. More than half of the problems posted on asktrp can be answered with "talk to your partner in an empathetic way".

Rian_Stone · 2017-08-31T14:39:34+00:00

Stuff like this is what coined 'fake it till you make it'

have you made it yet? Or have you deferred it until now

[deleted] · 2017-08-31T14:45:23+00:00

how many of these activities would you have done just by yourself

RedSkeller · 2017-08-31T17:31:01+00:00

I've been there man, you're burned out. I bet she looks to you for entertainment and you're jumping through all the hoops. The second you stop, it's over. I think you should really look at what you have and decided what's best for YOU.

[deleted] · 2017-08-31T17:51:41+00:00

as corey wayne says... 'as soon as you stop dating/courting your girl, someone else will'. so if you really want to stop, be prepared for the beginning of the end. once a week whether its dinner or activities is plenty. i do maybe once every 2 weeks or so and she complains about it. but we both work, we both get busy, we both end up tired after a long day, so we end up chilling most of the time. point is... it doesn't matter what you do, try new things, enjoy the time spent together and she will love you for it. in my opinion, you haven't done too much. feel free to do some of the things again if you enjoyed them. there is only so many things you can do. My gf and i often go to the same restaurants (mainly because im the picky one) and we always have a good time. They just want a reason to dress up and go out on the town with you, doesn't really matter what you do. if you don't want to do things like this on a frequent basis, you shouldnt be in a relationship. plating would get you the fun without having to do the extra. guess thats why most guys in here are all about dating, and not LTRs. to each his own.

Title	Feeling like I've run out and burned out of date activities with my LTR after 6 months?
Author	CD_Johanna
Upvotes	0
Comments	15
Date	August 31, 2017 11:20 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/6x68jn/feeling_like_ive_run_out_and_burned_out_of_date/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/feeling-like-ive-run-out-and-burned-out-of-date.113459 https://theredarchive.com/post/113459

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