I saw a post today on this sub that inspired me to talk about my story and seek advice here, since I feel this is one of the few places on Earth where I won't be judged like I would everywhere else.
I matched with a girl from a dating app and she drove 5 hours to my place to come see me. I passed out then woke up with that feeling down there as if I had sex the next morning. I asked her if we had sex and she said yes. I told her I don't remember and I wasn't conscious. I asked her if we used protection. She said yes. I asked where the condom was (I was creeped out by her and wanted to validate) because I didn't have condoms at the time. She said she doesn't know but she can't get pregnant anyways. I recorded the conversation because I found her strange at this point and didn't want to get #MeToo'd. I then kicked her out.

She tells me she's pregnant a few weeks later. I urged and begged for her to get an abortion because she was clearly a hood rat weirdo that I never wanted anything to do with.

She immediately went ratchet on me and said "YOU DONT WANNA TAKE CARE OF OUR BABY?!" and I almost threw up. I tried everything under the sun to convince her not to go through with it. She did.

I then stepped up and tried to be there for my son. We did a janky paternity test and it confirmed he was mine. However, she helped administer it. She wreaked havoc through my life like you wouldn't believe. Everything I was worried about happened and 10x worse. Everyone in my life was proud of me for stepping up until they met her.. even the kindest souls in the world were telling me to jump ship and just take it to court.
I documented everything and was ready to serve her papers for a US paternity test. She fled to somewhere in Germany right when she got wise to what I was doing.

Now, I'm not on the birth certificate.
She finally came back to the US but won't give me the address until I sign papers saying I'm the father according to the German courts... hell no I'm not doing that. The German courts already say I owe tens of thousands of dollars in child support. Germany can blow me.

She goes back and forth between here and there just trying to get something out of me then running away. The process is SO draining and anxiety inducing to lengths I've never experienced on any level according to anything else. She went back to Germany again when I was ready to crack down and serve her papers.

She just came back to California and is telling me she's been there for months. Working, putting him in school, they have a place and she's coming for me and that I have no shot in hell and is threatening me again. She's telling me things like "sorry, you're stuck with me forever and you're going to have to pay child support until my child is 18"

I'm gonna spare you the details of her personality because it's so twisted that some of you wouldn't believe me or it would just take me to a dark place and plus, it would take a series of books to explain her psychopathy.

I never wanted a child. If I did, I would have done it the right way with a woman of my choice... anybody but her.
I'm not exaggerating when I say this guys... She is the absolute worst case scenario baby mama drama anyone could ever imagine.

I'm not on the birth certificate, I never had a relationship with her, she has a very unstable life but she's ambitious and motivated in one thing, and one thing only- being spiteful.

She raped me but I wasn't traumatized in the sense that I was raped. Until I had to live with her and see her psycho behavior unfold more and more everyday. She baby trapped me. She parental alienated me. She destroyed my relationships, friendships and my family looks at me different. She has public made many statements that I was abusive (even though I have plenty on plenty of her admissions to making it up because she was mad at me) and the list goes on for days. I love him but what will I be worth if I just end up being an exhausted bum who got wrecked by a gold digging hood rat who used the system?
After all, can she really come after me for child support even though no legal paternity has been established? She said even if she finds me in 10 years that I'll have to pay arrears dating back to when she filed against me with the Child Support Agencies. I'm not sure. I don't want to live a life where I'm hiding from this piece of shit woman but I also do not want her in my life at all in any way. Judge if you want but if you knew her, you'd not only understand, you'd be on board. And if she does somehow manage to get me to give half of my wages to her, how do I cope with that? How do I cope with the fact that this animal reduces my life into half of what it would've been otherwise? How did you guys cope with getting bent over by the system? What are some tips?

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TLDR;
I worked so hard and tried so hard to be there for him but I can't keep living like this. I will 100% lose 1/2 of my life expectancy if I deal with her at all. I'm not "legally" obligated to do anything for her or the child so I packed my stuff up and moved to a new city. She e-mailed me threatening to find me, force me to take a US paternity test and force me to pay child support and deal with her for life... unless I marry here.... WHAT?!
I'm throwing in the towel. I don't want to live this life that I never asked for. I don't want to burden the cancer that is her existence just to maybe be able to visit him sometimes and drown in debt.
I did everything I could and I'll explain to him in the future what happened in an unbiased way. I'll simply just give him the facts. I won't make any opinion based statements about his mother.. even though I should.

A FEW QUESTIONS:

*I know some guys pay very little child support. But for the other guys, how do you justify/live with the insane amounts of child support getting taken out of your wages?

*Can she really charge me backpay/arrears for child support dating back to when she filed even if no paternity test has been done? Or does it start after paternity has been claimed?

*I'm not a bad person for simply trying to reclaim peace and happiness in my life right? I was always a happy person that traveled the world and had full and fun nights. I've been miserable since the day she entered my life.

*What would you guys do in my position if you never wanted to be a father, got raped into it and this woman wrecked every good thing in your life and even though you stood by patiently and did the "right thing," you just get fucked in the end?

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P.S.
Any personal criticisms/attacks on me is going to fall on completely deaf ears. I don't care about that and you'll be wasting your time. I know what society says but they're the ones responsible for cultivating this massive era of gold digging child support baby trapping hood rats that we deal with today.
I'm talking to men who know what I'm dealing with, dealt with what I've dealt with and can offer my some guidance.
Thanks fellas. Wish me luck.