I'm healed after 7 total years from my ex cheating and dragging me through hell.

I've met the most amazing woman. A WOMAN....not a little princess girl. Hang in there fellas it truly does get better. It's going to take some work.

Recently, I've had men reach out to me seeking help and asking about my journey. So I thought I'd share my response. I promise if you put in the work......you will be better and stronger than ever before.

All the best. If I can answer any questions or provide insight feel free to message or post. I'll do my best to reply.

Cheers!

 

Oh my friend don't think for one second it was not HARD. The process was grueling.

 

I never wanted a divorce. Only knew my now ex wife sexually.

 

Honestly, had I not had my faith in Christ I'm not sure I would have been able to have the introspection needed to get where I have.

 

That's not to say that one can't get there on their own.

 

I have a best friend that is a therapist so I was able to process MANY MANY things with him that helped.

 

That would be the first suggestion. Whether you have a personal friend or family member that had the professional skills.....or if you need to seek a counselor\therapist etc

 

That would be step 1.

Step 2 is going to be difficult but necessary. That would be through the help of the above to begin to set goals as to introspection within yourself to begin to heal. Keep in mind that this is a rehab of sorts. I always equated it to a broken leg. In my case it was really a broken heart because she cheated on me and then divorced me.

 

It was really really tough but I made up my mind that I wanted to do it right and I didn't want to be a cliche like most divorced men. In regards to losing weight through anxiety and getting the attention of women.....I didn't want to self medicate.....whatever that looks like to many.....usually drugs\alcohol or food.

 

Just bare in mind that this is a journey and that you are healing from something that is broken. If you go into it with these simple steps you have the best chance at healing correctly.

 

Lastly, and most importantly........remember this is your journey..........you get to take your time and go at your pace and do it your way. It really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. You will need to really tap into you.......what I mean by that is that you need to know within yourself what you need to do. You can either lie to yourself or not. It's up to you.

 

I chose to be 100% with myself. I wasn't going to lie and play games with myself. If I hurt I leaned into it and I tried to figure out why. Then I would adjust.

 

It took me the better part of almost 2 years to fully heal. You can see some of my posts in my history as to how things were going.

 

Just remember that THIS WILL PASS. How you get there and how healed you are when you finish will be up to you.

All the best!

-T