Learned Helplessness

There is this idea.

Learned helplessness.

Basically, it’s having a situation, or more broadly life; where efforts feel futile.

You feel like you have no power.

Effort seems to have no return, or even results in harm or negative consequences.

Especially for men, this directly causes depression.

I don’t know what percent, but most of them men I’ve encountered who had or have depression have some formed of learned helplessness.

They didn’t think they could change their situation.

Couldn’t alter where their life was going.

Stuck in some rut.

Perhaps stuck in a bad physical situation or health loop.

Perhaps too many times of trying and not seeing results.

Perhaps feeling like any choice they could have made, the costs and criticisms would have been too high to bear, trapping them.

Perhaps a prison of their own design, not being able to live up to hopes and dreams they had for themselves.

Any of the above creates depression symptoms in men. Flat affect. Less energy. Disengagement in social activities. A tendency to want to be alone.

Men can hide it pretty well. Many men with depression outwardly seem fine and get through their life. Some even fake enthusiasm.

You know it internally if they haven’t just accepted it as life. You know things don’t sparkle. You don’t feel enthused and alive. You feel like you’re just getting through the day. You feel like you’re just putting it together for the people that care about you.

Point me to a man feeling like that, and I’ll show you I can point to some degree of learned helplessness.

There is always a solution to it.

If you can’t see it, reach out. I’ll help you discover it.