Ladies, you’re dating/talking to a guy who is little older than you but you find out he is vastly less sexually “experienced” than you. How would you feel about it?

2020-10-20T06:12:41+00:00

Well, I don't have much sexual experience myself, but regardless, I would prefer if the guy hasn't been promiscuous. It increases the chances of him being someone with high standards and looking for commitment.

Physical touch and sex are very important ways to express love for me and I'm looking for a partner who would at least not want to have sex outside of a commited relationship. Otherwise it just means that he does not value them as much as I do (or in the same way).

Also, a small number of partners doesn't necessarily mean little experience. If you had only one or two partners but were very sexually active with them, that counts as experience to me.

NubiaAnu · 2020-10-20T06:08:05+00:00

I couldn’t care any less..

Lil_Snulli · 2020-10-20T12:26:44+00:00

I would be ecstatic, it means you get to introduce him to new techniques over time and he'll be able to bond with you emotionally during sex easier. For me, I've only had two sexual relationships whereas my partner had far more. He gets to show me new moves and also reap the benefits of having a way more excited and less guarded partner, which I assume would apply vice-versa.

Obnoxiousjimmyjames · 2020-10-20T15:54:53+00:00

The idea that men are promiscuous and get laid all the time is it outright myth; most men don’t have sex nearly as much as they want you to believe.

In fact, for every “Chad” having sex with dozens of partners, there are probably 20-40 men who either don’t have sex at all, or only have 3 or less partners.

In my college years (and I’ve been told by many women I’m “cute”) my “number” was 7 by the time I graduated. I’ve barely doubled that number... in the TWENTY years since; and I LOVE sex and seek it often, and I live in the Nation’s biggest city.

However, having said all this I acknowledge that the younger generations are growing up in a much more sexualized environment so perhaps the numbers for everyone on the planet currently in their 20s is double to triple what I’ve suggested?

__morpheus · 2020-10-20T06:25:19+00:00

Guys generally lie about their lay count. He is honest. Other guys who are saying 7-8 maybe lying.

rosesonthefloor · 2020-10-20T20:32:04+00:00

It really depends on how you feel about it, and what you want out of your sexual relationship.

For me, personally, I prefer my men to take control, lead sexually, pursue, etc., preferably within a D/s context. My more experienced partners have felt more comfortable in that role. My less experienced partners have felt less comfortable in that role. I am not at all saying that less experienced men would be less dominant, etc., just that my experience has been that with experience tends to come confidence.

I wouldn’t be concerned by a man with a low number who makes me feel safe engaging in sex or kink with him (i.e., he’s done his research, has good social/emotional/physical awareness to lead effectively, etc.). The only thing that would make me feel uncomfortable is having to “lead” sexually by teaching him how to do things in the bedroom.

NicoleInBlue · 2020-10-20T06:04:06+00:00

I wouldn't be OK with a man with a less sexual experience than me. I am 23 and have a low n-count. If the guy is older than me but has had less partners, I would assume he has some problems attracting women or something in that nature. I also don't want to be with a man who feels like he is missing on something because he hasn't chased enough tail.

If you and your partner have had that conversation and your cards are on the table (i.e. you are not covering up a promiscuous past let's say), and he's OK with it, I don't see a problem. Sexual compatibility has little to do with the number of partners one's had.

2020-10-21T06:42:57+00:00

When I met my boyfriend I was vastly experienced (BAD BAD choices in my teens) and he was almost a virgin (he was VERY anxious around women) and we are the exact same age. It matters what age you are talking about, because when we were 23 we were at the crossroads of ending the college life and starting to be full-blown adults. It can breed some resentment if the man doesn't like your past sleeping around or has any hunches that you will cheat or leave him; also, it can breed some frustration in the woman if he is not skilled enough and she feels like she needs to 'tutor' him through it (not a very feminine thing to do).

This situation is not a red flag in itself, if everything else in the relationship and with the parterns' personalities is fine, this is just a minor hop. There are other more important things to focus on!

2020-10-21T22:18:27+00:00

To be crude, basically there's fewer women that you need to untrain him from. I'm thinking about the Ali Wong clip where she talks about training a guy to eat pussy, like that is hard to learn and unlearn. You get a cleaner slate!

Ms_Sommersby · 2020-10-22T11:48:10+00:00

If he's good in bed who gives a shit. As long as he's up for what I want to do and vice versa we are a match.

2020-10-24T09:10:44+00:00

It’s less about some specific set of numbers and more what he wants out of this relationship with you. Does he want to commit or play?

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