My wife blind sided me, after I mentioned to her is that I wasn't feeling any mutual love.

BurnDownTheMission68 · 2022-08-14T13:13:41+00:00

“I have fixed myself to please her” this is so illustrative as to where men see themselves in relationships. 😞

TakeBackWhat · 2022-08-14T09:54:13+00:00

Only a filing/legal action should blindside you. Now shut up IRL and internet and file first!

stent00 · 2022-08-14T19:15:12+00:00

Never change yourself to please someone else. Do it for yourself bro. Ya I had the same thing happen in my marriage no physical affection and really distant. I tried to talk about it for years but she stone walled me. That is until she wanted a divorce and finally came clean she didn't find me attractive for like 12 years and just stayed cause she was comfortable as she was a Sahm. So had a cushy life. All I ever wanted was for her to be honest with me. And from any future relationship it's either be honest or bust I'll stay single. Got no time for that

sicrm · 2022-08-14T11:21:11+00:00

“Everyone is your enemy. Everyone is your friend. Every possible series of events is happening at once. Live that way and nothing will surprise you. Everything that happens will be something you’ve seen before."

remember that going forward and you won’t get blindsided like this again.

also an outlet can help a lot if you don’t have one already (going to the gym, picking up a hobby, joining a fighting club or class for something you want to learn).

if you go with the fighting club, tell the trainer a little about what you’re going through. then get work out until you can’t anymore. then pick a day to do it over again.

wood-thrush · 2022-08-15T18:08:13+00:00

Really sorry to hear about your situation. I discovered my ex-wife’s affair from a similar discussion. Being blindsided like that is extremely tough. Do your best not to feel guilty. Unless you were being harmful to yourself or her, you should not be forced to change. The love should be unconditional.

Going to therapy was very beneficial to me in the early stages to have a 3rd party to talk to and to walk me through the grieving process. Best of luck, feel free to chat if you need someone to talk to.

Wonderment55 · 2022-08-17T00:13:12+00:00

She is so unworthy of anything. Evil bitch!

Title	My wife blind sided me, after I mentioned to her is that I wasn't feeling any mutual love.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	4
Comments	8
Date	August 14, 2022 7:37 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/wo0k6y/my_wife_blind_sided_me_after_i_mentioned_to_her/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/my-wife-blind-sided-me-after-i-mentioned-to-her-is.1209097 https://theredarchive.com/post/1209097

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