My wife and I have been together since we were 20, we are now 33 and 32, during our time together I have seen WAY to much of her family to EVER see them in a positive light.

My wife has also kept me out of so much that I dont know what goes on but to name a few tid bits:

  1. Someone in their family murdered a 15 year old boy. I wont say more details but hes out of jail now... they dont talk to him but im including it to add context for how f-ked up these ppl are.
  2. My SIL's husband is an obnoxious douchebag who has ZERO respect for other peoples boundaries and personal items/space. When they come over to our house he walks into my room and starts touching everything I have, including but not limited to: my Anime body pillow ive had sex w (judge all you want) mind you this man is like 35, I dont think this level of intrusion is normal for that age. I also suspect him of having an affair w my wife, I told her about this but she insists she has been faithful but I cant do much more than suspect.

The man is also a POS father and a horrible person. Him and his SIL are broke and lived w my MIL until he got kicked out of that house for getting into a physical fight with my MIL, pulling hair and throwing plates, etc. He now lives in a trailer-park (nothing inherently wrong w this but the problem is its in a high crime area) their kids have been picked up by the manager walking around alone at 3am.. their kids are 6 and 4 years old... When I told my wife I hated that man and couldnt stand being around him for more than 10 min, and that If I had to keep seeing him I would beat his A$$ my wife responded with a shock: "thats our family, how could you say that????" umm idk maybe because hes a POS who treats your sister like crap, and has 2 kids w 2 different women and cant take care of either one.

3). Multiple instances of her alcoholic mother wanting to throw a party and get drunk at any chance she can get. Most recent example:

I wanted to hire movers as we were switching from a rental house to a duplex, but my wife insisted on having her family help bc "she cant trust strangers" so last time we moved we had her entire family throw a party at our house and say they were going to help us move.. which they did not help us with until DAYS later (staying past our move out date) what caused this delay ? her drunk mother accused her current husband at the time of having sex with my wife, one of her kids.. and was throwing bottles, dishes, etc. at him. After my MIL and her husband left, myself and rest of in laws managed to get things moved out.. eventually...

wife insists she was never touched or did anything w that man, and I believe her bc I dont have any evidence or reason to suspect it.

her family has a long history of mental illness, her mom says crazy stupid sh!t all the time and her sister has been officially diagnosed with schizophrenia.

4.) Apparently my wife, her sister and my MIL left a dog outside in the hot sun all day until it died, my wife, her sister, and her mother were all inside and were just annoyed with the dogs barking and "didnt realize that could happen". This happened while we were dating and my wife waited years to tell me about this....

5.) my wife cheated on me early on in our relationship when we were dating, I was NOT bothered by this as we were in the early phase of us getting to know each other and our relationship was NOT serious at the time, the guy she slept with was her ex I was not angry about this.. I WAS angry that she waited 6 years to tell me this.. and constantly fear one day shes guna tell me about another affair she had 10 or so years ago... which I am only including to state that it outlines how much of an issue point #2 is, I have told all of this to my wife and she insists on having her family over for dinner, going to church with them, and doing "family stuff" with them. When I get angry, she acts so supersized and tells me she "takes care" of me and is a "good wife who loves me" but she has no willingness to admit that she has been ignoring and gaslighting the problems we have.

6.) Her FIL is also a POS, he gambled away all his money and is now living with family because he has nothing. While I feel sorry for him, he is constantly asking us for money, weve given him some in the past and ive helped him move apartments and done numerous stuff to help him out. but its NEVER enough...

I really hate and resent my in-laws for many other reasons, my wife still has her tonsils, and wisdom teeth, despite a physican and dentist recommending they be removed. My wife also has scoliosis, spina bifida, and alot of other disabling illnesses, but doesnt trust doctors and thinks they just want our money and this is verbatim what her parents told her as a kid.

Honorable mention: when she was a kid she apparently let/figured out how to have a dog lick her down there, she said she enjoyed it as a kid but didnt get it and her parents gave her spankings for it, I strongly suspect she was sexually abused as a kid, kids dont know about pleasure centers in their body or crap like that...

At this point I feel that I have no choice but to divorce my wife before I go completely ballistic and end up mentally hospitalized, or worse. She keeps getting her family involved in our marriage, acts like I dont have the right to dislike bad people, ignores all of my concerns surrounding them, and refuses to stand w me and support me or even just understand the conclusion ive drawn and why..she just insists shes been a good wife and that everything is somehow okay bc of it... then she freaks out when I get angry acting shocked, like why is this a surprise ?