Im posting here as this is really and truly a married/partnered women problem and I am seeking advice from that perspective. How do you go about maintaining desire while breastfeeding a baby?

From a biological perspective, nursing a baby floods the female body with tons of oxytocin to help bond mother and baby. This is the same hormone system that is used in pair bonding for women, and it is the rush of oxytocin that we get from orgasms that women tend to crave when wanting sex. Several aspects of intimacy (skin to skin, eye contact, nipple stimulation) stimulate oxytocin, and generally, craving those things from your man comes across as genuine sexual interest (because it is on a very biological level).

So while nursing, my body is full of oxytoxin already from nursing around the clock. Even though I find my man attractive and am very responsive to when he is interested, I just find that I have little to no spontaneous desire for sex myself.

So is my only solution to fake interest and just remind myself to initiate until Im done nursing and that craving desire returns? Or is there something I can do to increase my spontaneous desire?

Note: my partner is not unhappy with the situation, hes very understanding, but I know it means a lot when I initiate and genuine desire is important.