What does your “team” look like? Your friends/circle.

theg0dherself · 2024-02-24T10:24:32+00:00

People are all we got. No matter how it may seem more convenient to be alone, loneliness just attracts loneliness. Don’t be alone but do try to meet people who have the same values as you.

bowhunter_fta · 2024-02-24T13:57:54+00:00

Back in around 1985 (yeah, I'm old), I read a book, I believe it was Tom Hopkins 'How to Master the Art of Selling'.

In that book, Hopkins said, "remove all things and all people from your life that do not add value".

That really hit me hard. I had a group of friends that were on a slow rise to mediocrity. They all wanted to have whole "home with a white picket fence" and a steady job, blah, blah, blah.

Now, there's nothing wrong with that. That's what most people want. But I wanted more.

What I noticed was that this friend group was very passive/aggressive towards me and my goals/drive to succeed. They'd make comments about "why do you work so hard, you should take more time off..." etc. They were not supportive of my drive to succeed and would, subtley act to undermine it.

What I think it was (and I want to emphasize that I'm speculating/projecting here) is that my drive to be successful was me basically holding up a mirror to them of the person they were each capable of being. I reminded each of them that they had decided to "settle" for less than they were capable of.

So, over time, I just made myself less available to them and eventually, we drifted apart.

I have run into them from time to time over the ensuing decades and it's always good to see them and catch up...but our paths diverged nearly 40 years ago...they all went on to being "average and ordinary", work for 35 or 40 years and are either close to being retired or have retired.

I choose a different path. I choose to go after my goals and dreams.

Today, I own and run and several financial businesses....retirement financial planning (actually, I have a highly paid team that does most of the running...I just oversee and act in a visionary capacity). Those businesses have given me an 8-figure net worth and pay me a 7-figure income whether I work or not.

I don't say that to brag....there's no need for that, especially in this forum where there are so many successfuly people (or people looking for success)...but the point I want to make is that I began my red pill journey (and it was a long journey and I was still very much a blue pill guy for many years even after I "made myself less available to that group of friends"), by eliminating all things and all people from my life that don't add value and surrounding myself with people that were fellow travelors.

I turned 60 recently and I sometimes lament the fact that I don't have that many true great friends. To be frank, I've got two real friends and a bunch of ancillary friends/associates. But those friendships are solid.

One is my business partner (I gave him a small minority ownership in my businesses about 8 years ago and it's one of the best decisions I ever made) and the other is my childhood best friend who I met on the first day of Kindergarten in 1969 and we've been great friends ever since.

I know either of these guys has my back and I can trust them both implicitly (as we've I've been through difficult times with both of them and they stood by my side).

That's what matters when comes to friends. Do they align with your values, do you share a common bond and will they stand with you when times are bad.

Do they do all that and add value to your life...and are you willing to do the same for them?

Of so, that's who I want as my friend.

-Wyzelle- · 2024-02-24T10:08:09+00:00

2 real friends 11 friends I’m faking with.

AlternativeAward · 2024-02-24T12:30:38+00:00

My team are guys I met randomly on the internet when I was 21yo (im 29 now and im the oldest in the group) and some of their old friends who joined the pack. 9 guys overall out of whom I can consider 3 as very close friends. Some of them live in my city, others further away

It just kinda happened and I consider myself lucky because that group is all very intelligent and honest people

One thing I would recommend is to not care too much about someones political views. They can change rapidly, esp. when someone is in their 20s

Before meeting this group I also didnt click with most of guys, I had some "good dudes" as my friends but yeah they werent that valuable or interesting.

About ideologies, goals, mindset - when we first met we didnt have similar ideologies, but we do have them now, we built them by discussing for thousands of hours. goals and mindset? Most men under 25 dont have clear goals. I didnt. Some of them did but that isnt why they became my friends. They became my friends because we always had something to talk about, then we stayed as friends because we had respect for each other and helped each other in need.

ThrowawayYAYAY2002 · 2024-02-24T18:27:37+00:00

In all honesty, pretty fucked.

One is an Ex-Heroin Addict who is on the mend.

One has literally nothing going on in life but his job and his family. So when we talk he talks about nothing but his daughter, his work, his daughter, and his work. He bores me to tears. An Average Joe with no hobbies or life. Really fucking boring.

One is on the right path. Well paid job, good woman, beautiful car, and he's smart. Funny as fuck too, so that's always good.

One is mid 40's, obese, lives with his girl, unemployed. Bit of a snake.

And there's more. I go back decades with this lot, and we've been through a fuck ton together. Proper bonds. But to any young 'un reading this... you're the average of the 5 people you spend your time with, so choose wisely. And ruthlessly cull anyone who isn't on the same page as you.

KingGerbz · 2024-02-24T16:18:45+00:00

I have 4 others that I’d consider my true brothers. Two are my cousins. One I’ve known since I was 4, the other since I was 12.

I/we have a shitload of other friends and acquaintances as well but those are temporary.

If you have just one true friend you’re lucky.

thesuccessfuladrian · 2024-02-24T12:16:53+00:00

I'd say RP is also about this subject, having a team of man u can trust

kyle_fall · 2024-03-06T03:18:55+00:00

Join meetup groups around business, AI, and crypto so you meet guys that will help you make money and in big cities, there are usually one or a few pickup groups to make friends for girls.

You can also create your own container events and communities to cherry-pick members. All you have to do is market it and people will join. If you're in college then even easier.

South_Dig_9172 · 2024-02-24T17:03:02+00:00

currently moved in with gf and prioritizing my studies so I can get a software dev job. I eat code, shit code, and dream code. Currently content because I’m chasing my dreams. Having friends right now would just pull me down. I can have friends later once I have that job. For now, gotta hustle till I wanna puke.

symere_woods2 · 2024-02-24T18:38:34+00:00

21 as well Op.

Some friends who know me really well from my childhood. They’re not the most successful, but they know me extremely well so it’s helpful to get their feedback and perspective regarding my choices and stuff.

The rest are friends from university, medical students whom I studied with or law students that I’m currently studying with. I consider them more high-value. Many of whom are female and slightly more than friends.

And then there’s mentors, people with much more experience and knowledge than me who I’m close with. Some of them are former teachers, one is a professor, another is a doctor.

Then there’s a few religious teachers.

Dr_Click_Click_Boom · 2024-02-25T03:21:30+00:00

One of my older brothers. We're separated by eight years. He's an over achiever, voted most likely to succeed by his classmates in high school and for the most part has lived up to it.

The only person I have ever trusted 100% was my late father. My brother is a close second at 95+ percent. Otherwise I'm pretty much a loner.

WarKidArez · 2024-02-25T14:24:16+00:00

Don’t have one

bush2874 · 2024-02-26T22:18:46+00:00

I’d say learn how to become friends quickly with new people. Connect with them over a common activity, outlook, or goal. Then when you meet some guys that have a similar vision it’ll be easier.

I recommend going to the gym and make friends there. Those people are all aiming up and it starts with a foundation of fitness.

Andgelyo · 2024-02-27T05:56:48+00:00

Early 30s man here. I got 3 best friends, which includes my older brother (older by a year), and 2 childhood friends since elementary school. Yes, we all hang out together and travel the world together. Both me and my brother make 6 figures as health care workers, my friend administers tests to people taking licensing exams, and my other friend is an uber driver. We all prioritize health, wealth, and spending with our loved ones. We are actually brain storming ideas right now to create a side hustle business together.

Artistic_Tap7467 · 2024-02-27T17:49:22+00:00

used to have a tonne of friends being a club rat. just turned 30 and the few friends I have left stopped socialising with me when they found partners. They all make quite decent amount (range is six fig to 500k), have ideal partners, but I stopped making efforts to keep in contact as I've realised they are selfish people who I cant depend upon.

This leaves the outer group of friends and they claimed to be RP but one got an ugly gf (he can definitely do better and he knows), and another one became official with a gf that he previously complained about being a feminist, yeah, figure that one out. The rest of the outer group kinda just fell apart because those two stopped socialising and went out of contact after finding partners. Never made efforts to be in contact with them, obvious reasons.

Also used to have a whole bunch of individual friends which were all girls that I rotated around hooking up or hanging out with, good social proof some hot some not but not bad. 7's the minimum.

But those I cut out too in my late 20's, I realised a lot of them were wanting relationships with me, and after I rejected them they stopped talking to me, which honestly made me feel quite shit cause some were actually fun to chill with and some had a good sense of humour. (I personally think humour is one of the best and rarest qualities attractive girls can have).

I am pretty self aware and often detach my ego to see things clearly, honestly this post makes it sound like im a bad person or something is wrong with me thats why they all left but i'm pretty sure i'm just average joe, im not a dickhead or asshole, I have compassion, sociable etc, I think at the end if the day i've just been strict on cutting out people if they dont align with my morals and values, and also been unlucky with my friends..

So anyways I figured I need a better judgement when making friends. I kind of like the peace though lol, I know I am well capable of socialising and making friends, am good with humour and women. although I have a nice car, nice apartment, very easy wfh job that pays good, i'd say decent looks since i get harassed by women pretty often at clubs, BUT i'm choosing not to focus on friends or women atm. I'm using this time as a perfect opportunity to hit some personal goals (building my businesses, body build, new (healthy) hobbies, skincare, upgrade wardrobe, unlearn bad habits ive taken up in my 20's).

Being alone and lonely are two different things. But also yes friends are important, but the right friends are necessary. Make sure they align with your views. I don't want a mediocre NPC life, i'm an entrepreneur at heart, i'd rather die alone and a failure but having had the chance to be exceptional.

it's been a crazy ride in my 20's. Lots of good memories and stories. Built businesses that have succeeded and died off. Although I feel like it was an amazing chapter as things are very boring and quite now, I know the future brings even better days, I'm only excited to see what happens.

Feel free to criticize my decisions idk would be good feedback i always keep an open mind to listen and learn. Maybe one question I have for people over the age of 30 is what would they recommend me to do in my 30's.

Great comments in here all in all. God bless top G.

Title	What does your “team” look like? Your friends/circle.
Author	throwinaway1999
Upvotes	65
Comments	32
Date	February 24, 2024 10:06 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1ayr34g/what_does_your_team_look_like_your_friendscircle/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/what-does-your-team-look-like-your-friendscircle.1246297 https://theredarchive.com/post/1246297

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