if i could inception on my current girlfriend i totally would. our relationship is simply toxic; and its not like she's the worst person ever, but she basically emotionally abuses me and i'm sick of it. can someone in Vegas come woe my girl away from me?

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first of all i want to start with the fact that I want her to feel like its her complete choice to leave. I don't want to kick her out, i want her to think she found something better and is over me in the "love" way that shows itself with drunken rages and emotional abuse. she pays zero dollars toward any bills, even her own. she basically burns out every time she tries to hold a job. she never listens to her own advice. she acts like everything is my fault when i'm low on money. look im no broke ass dude, i work IT; I'm a Navy Submarine Veteran, i make decent money for my son and i, but my girl and i are divorced and back together. i need someone to "present" themselves to her and convince her to leave and never look back. I need someone to just get her to leave me and my son and go have a productive life. she's been in 4 rehabs and relapsed every time, she threatens suicide as a means to control me, she acts like the SUPER bare minimal cleaning she does is somehow a task impossible for me to do (i clean alot compared to the messes she makes while im at work all day). i know i'm going to get alot of flack for this; i dont care, this is me reaching out from my couch hoping, praying, and begging someone (i think a male would have a better chance but who knows, she's probably bi) to basically convince her to leave me and my son and incept the idea in her as if its hers and she wanted this. (6 years old, can explain how the gasses on neptune can be used for energy conservation, can mod minecraft with me and can multiply; this kid doesnt need her recklessness; but i'm not trying to take him from her)

we did not get re-married; she is a unhooked girl. there will be ZERO hard feelings, in fact i'll probably really want to buy you a beer or something for helping me.