Why guys are being ruined socially, short TED talk (x-post from r/nofap)

PedroElOzo · 2012-03-13T04:20:01+00:00

You realize the arousal addiction could be applied to Reddit and the irony in this, right?

sin_waives · 2012-03-13T06:03:18+00:00

Interesting. i spend a lot of time with the internet and video games and i am also quite shy. It seems that the best solution is that i need to take more risks socially.

p8ntslinger · 2012-03-13T16:51:48+00:00

I do not think the demonization of video games and internet usage really helps people understand why this is happening (I believe it is happening). People are likely to ball up and scream when they hear that playing video games is making them losers.

I do not believe that this is the core of the issue. Isolation in general makes ANYBODY less skilled in social interaction. If you want to be able to talk to girls, then you need to go and talk to a bunch of girls.

Practice makes perfect.

Playing video games, looking at too much porn, or being on the internet too much is not the problem- they are just means of isolation. I would argue that someone who reads books all the time is in the same boat. Or someone who is obsessed with some hobby and does little else as well.

Stop isolating yourselves- social interaction with anyone, not just women, takes practice and a bunch of screw-ups to be good at. No one is James Bond overnight or their first time at a bar. It takes time and practice.

TrippAdvice1 · 2012-03-13T22:35:35+00:00

This is why my job as a dating coach exists.

2012-03-14T01:03:58+00:00

It really depends on the game IMO, some games are really social. They will fuck you up for other reasons (mostly health related) if you play too much, but they aren't all bad for communication skills. When I played wow I was in voice chat every day, talking to guys and girls about all kinds of stupid shit. The social rules might be a bit different than irl, but it's not all that bad IMO.

The other things social games can teach you is how to text. It's really difficult to make jokes via text that are easily understood, but if you joke around a lot via texting in games, you can get some good practice.

If you are a gamer, I recommend getting in a guild with an even balance of men-women though. One problem with most games is they are dominated by guys, and if you spend all your time talking to guys you pretty much start to lose your reality filter and will say pretty much anything. Keep a few girls around to keep your weirdness in check.

Darrensmushbrain · 2012-03-13T09:25:45+00:00

I totally notice this... most men seem like social inepts / daisy boys these days. Not just the younger crowd, middle aged til like 50, too. Some attribute it to the idolization of womanhood (since the 50s, not saying this is a bad thing either, just that momma's boys are rewarded very much). I like this explanation, too.

Title	Why guys are being ruined socially, short TED talk (x-post from r/nofap)
Author	TheMortifyd
Upvotes	33
Comments	12
Date	March 13, 2012 12:33 AM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/qtrd0/why_guys_are_being_ruined_socially_short_ted_talk/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/why-guys-are-being-ruined-socially-short-ted-talk.1292217 https://theredarchive.com/post/1292217

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