So I made a feature film, took me 5 long years, and it got into a Film Festival in Santa Cruz. So I flew out to San Francisco and stayed here for about 4 days, to attend the festival, and also just go out and see what life is like outside the metropolitan area.
Slight Shameless Plug: If you're interested in the film at all, check out www.bullseyemovie.com
Being in SF was definately eye opening for me, as you'll see in this FR and my next one.
So for the first night, on Thursday, I flew in and I didn't really know the area too well.
I should've planned my vacation a little better. Oh well...
Sitting in my hotel room I looked up the most popular venues, like clubs and bars...
I found one club called Fusion that had a lot of reviews, so fuck it, I went.
The crowd at this scene was mostly like 25-35. I'm 28, it was good enough for me.
I have been trying to learn and perform successfully, Rapid Escalation. You can check out the video here.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V3Z4Nq0OrrM
So, I enter the club, Peacocking to the max as usual, looking almost like Mr. T. I'm fuckin ridiculous and crazy, I'm well aware.
So I'm in the club, nervous as fuck, feeling terrible AA. So, I do my stupid dancing-game, which is comprised of just dancing my butt off, like I "don't give a shit", making eye contact with girls, giving them value, then taking their hand to dance with them.
It worked on some girls, and on others not so much.
Looking back, I realize that the girls who rejected dancing with me, may not have been "not willing to dance with me", but instead were just still too uncomfortable with themselves and even me to start boogy-ooging, that's why people drink...
A lot of dudes loved me, and followed me around for state and to get into my approaches when I opened groups up.
I didn't close anyone on anything and I got super frustrated and even resentful towards women for rejecting me. It was really pissing me off. I didn't quite "get it" just yet.
I kept dancing, and dancing... I realized I wasn't working on Rapid Escalation at all, by actually "talking" to women... Wtf is wrong with me? I feel like such a pussy.
I got so upset and resentful and looking for excuses, and I knew I was doing this...
So I decided to walk away, try to chill out somewhere... I found it really difficult. The environment was too much for me. I had anxiety about talking to women in such a loud environment, as if they wouldn't be able to hear me, especially since I already talk so fucking fast.
I may not be a Top Dawg PUA, I definitely don't think I'm a Chode... I'm just a really really ballsy chump.
When I was trying to relax, I noticed these 2 slammin bitties, HB10s, sorta standing about 5 yards away from me, with their bodies sorta facing in my direction. But they never made any eye contact at all... I was thinking, "maybe they want me to approach. If I don't approach now, someone else will or they will lose interest." I also couldn't believe that these 2 smoking hot girls would want a guy like me. I'm not ugly, I've been called Hot and beautiful and really sexy by girls, even pretty girls, but as we all know, validation from others doesn't really do much for our innerselves. Guess I still just don't fully believe in myself...
So I decided to just wait, and see what happens, and try to analyze this from an intelligent PUA pov.
They started to walk in my direction, yes I was watching, and then one of them stopped the other and said, "wait"...
Then they just sorta eventually walked away, and into this VIP section that I was near... Maybe they were thinking about how to get in there... Who knows... guess I'll never find out now...
Another group of about 4 girls and 1 guy were dancing. A bunch of dudes tried opening them up, and every girl turned them down. Most of these guys' strategy was of course to start dancing from behind them almost like a smooth suprise. I almost never see that working these days. I remember that was like THE way to do it, back when I was 16 in all the slutty NJ clubs like Club Chrome... God I loved those days... I rememeber going there every weekend, an almost every weekend I'd make out with a super hot girl!!! And it was fucking awesome! I had the best times there! One time a girl let me finger her on the dancefloor! And all the time, all I had to do was just sorta jump onto the dancefloor, dance around a bit, and then go up to a girl from behind, or even from front, and 9 times out of 10 they'd dance with me. If they're dancing with me already, then I'd say bout 100% of the time, they'd make out with me, grind my dick all over their pelvis and ass, and get mad freaky! Fuck yes! hahaha!
Today, at 28, that isn't the case. People have grown up, gained some standards, and most of the girls in these clubs are no longer that easy... I used to think that they would make out with me because they actually like my dance moves, and needed to make sure I'm cool before dancing and hooking up with me... I never thought that, "oh, they just want to know I'm confident."
So I'm near this group that's turning down guys 1 after the other. I jump in, and just dance near them, not from behind all creepily, not in some way that says, "i just wanna fuck right now."
And they liked it. They opened up to me, and the dude loved me too. We were just dancing and having fun. I spun the girls around, most of them. There were 2 girls I was interested in here. I spat my best game, just trying to be positive, and give value, have fun, and not think about the "sex" thing...
There was one beastly chick in the group, that was giving me mad IOIs and I really did not want to dance with her... I've had and fucked enough whales in my life, trust me. I've suffered enough. I'm not here to just bust a nutt... I can do that anyday now... I want to fuck a really hot girl, at LEAST ONCE, god dammit!
So, I'm dancing with these, girls trying to escalate, while still giving the guy value, NOT ignoring him.
They all love me, but the girls I'm showing slightly more interest in, aren't really throwing me back anything, and even gave me negative feedback sometimes... When they did that, I would just continue having fun, with whoever was next to me, as in The Party Is Where I Am... I was a magnet of attraction. A lot of people enjoyed me there...
Eventually this guy in the group approaches me and says, "Hey man! You're a really great dancer! You're really awesome! But listen Alex, these girls, they're really intimidated by you. And they all have boyfriends or have something going on."
I played it cool.
"I'm sure you can get mad pussy here, but if you just like to dance and just wanna dance, you're more than welcome to stay with us and have fun. If you want more, you should probably find someone else."
I stayed cool and said, "naa man. I just like to dance."
He smiled, and it kept going. Funny how he said that, yet the beastly one of the group was trying to dance with me, was sending me IOIs and all sorts of stuff...
I went to the bar to get some water, and the beastly one was there... Fuck it, I wasn't having any luck anyways, so I just started talking to her about nothing, about how I don't drink too much, how I like to dance... w/e... eventually I told her I'm gonna go back to dancing. They caught me few more times in the club before I eventually left without saying goodbye to them.
I saw these 2 really pretty girls, just standing around like wallflowers, so I decided to finally try some rapid escalation and talk to them. I go up to one of them, put out my hand and say, "Hey, I'm Alexander. What's your name?"
She just looked at me all uncomfortable, and nodded no, and shook her hand in a, "I don't want to meet guys tonight" sorta way, even though they were all dolled up. I stayed in there, looking at her, and finally felt like, "okay, it's over. I'm out." So, I just turned my head kinda away from her, and said, "Wow... Well, don't give a fuck." and I walked away, hoping it stung her a bit... Yea, I was butt hurt by how she wouldn't even talk to me, w/e...
I went back on the dancefloor, and they started to play one of my favorite songs. I turned it up on the dance floor. My flaying hands hit some girl's drink, and it flew into her face and hair. She got super pissed off and her gf was defending her. I was really appologetic. The girl was complaining to me about how her hair smells like alcohol and how i ruined everything. I asked her what it was an offered to buy her a drink. She told me what she got in a really nasty way... I said okay, make my way to the bar and then I had this thought, "what If I don't... I'm never seeing her again anyways."...
So I just waited it out a bit, hoping they'd forget about me...
They actually came to the bar in 5 minutes, looking for me. The girl who was pissed, was still pissed. I told her that she looked beautiful and that her hair looks great, and that I'm really sorry...
So she told me to buy her another drink... So fuck it, I did, with a really pissed off look on my face... Honestly, if she wasn't so nasty about the whole thing, I probably wouldn't have been so pissed. Her friend was actually being more open minded and seeing how I'm actually a nice guy who isn't trying to be a dick... I didn't give a fuck though.
So while she was ordering a drink for herself, I was waiting with a grudge. Her nicer friend opened me by noticing my ring and asking to see it... Peacocking at work here...
I quickly realized "what's going on here"... and I was really pissed off about buying this nasty bitch (who I saw later on was a bitch to every single person there and just had this nasty persona about her all night), and because she was her friend, I really didn't want anything to do with them...
I looked at her with a "please don't waste my time" look and said, "Don't worry about it."
"I just want to see your ring! May I?"
"Don't worry about it."
"Let me see your ring. Can I see it?"
I finally showed her my ring with discomfort. She makes a quick nodd of approval, smiles and says, "thank you."
Clearly, she really didn't care about the ring, she was just looking for an opener... It's just a ring guys, wooptyfuckingdoo.
Her friend finally got her drink, I put the money down, didn't say another word to these 2, and walked away like, "okay... now fuck you guys." haha.
I went back to that group of 4 girls and 1 guy who were really nice to me, along with dancing with everyone else and giving people value...
The nicer girl, was noticing my social proof and my confident persona in the club.
But I kept ignoring her, I was still pissed off at them. Honestly, it felt good to get some payback by rejecting some pretty girls for stupid bullshit, just like how they do to me all the time...
We made eye contact another couple of times, and I just quickly looked away.
Finally, I decided to let it go a little bit, and when we made eye contact again, I gave her a nodd like, "hey."
I didn't smile or anything, I didn't want to give her any of my value.
Later on, I noticed her friend still being a fucking bitch to everyone, while the nicer one was being patient with her and nicer to people...
So I let it go more, and the next time we made eye contact, I threw some value. She goes,
"Do you remember me?"
"Yes I do!"
"Haha, as long as you don't throw a drink in my face, we're cool!"
"Hah, don't worry, I won't."
I made sure to steer clear of her bitchy friend all night. She however, gave me a high 5. I tried gaming her a little more later on, but that bubble had died.
There was another group of like 3 cute black girls that I opened, and danced with. One of them, I got really close with, but her friends eventually dragged her away.
At about 2 am, the club closed and I left feeling like shit, outcome dependent, hoping to have some crazy fun sex on my vacation to Cali... I came back to my room, and was really upset. I felt like I'm just not "getting it"... As if something within me, is keeping me from getting success...
I did also realize that I didn't do any rapid escalation approaches... So, I didn't do too much work on that at all really...
I did however learn that I was perhaps being too turnt up, too full of energy, and was too nervous... I wasn't chill enough... Maybe instead of always being the energy level of the room +1, I should be -1, and that'll probably actually realistically be the energy level of the room +1...
Edit: A lot of Gay guys were hitting on me as well, if that actually means anything... lol, I guess not really. They're not my target.
Things I Did Well
Approached, approached, approached
Let go of some stupid bullshit, at least a little
opened up groups
tried to chill out
Things I did poorly
Things I need to work on
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