"I can't tell if this is all you want me for."

Cryogen_at_work · 2011-04-04T19:14:15+00:00

In that case, I'd be honest with her, if thats all your looking for.

If you F closed on the first date (which is probably what happened), you have every right to say that you didn't expect anything serious to be going on.

"Look, I'm not looking to be tied down right now, if you're looking for something more serious, I think you should look elsewhere."

If she flips out, just get up, get dressed and leave. That's what I'd do.

frogma · 2011-04-04T19:32:14+00:00

Depends how much you want to keep seeing her and if you want to take it further.

"Well what do you wanna do then??" is usually my response to something like that, then they get mad, then I talk about my values and how I want to find a great girl, but sex is important to me, blah blah blah, and usually they calm down. If you don't really care whether you keep seeing her or not, just be playful and roll it with it: "Yep, sex is the only thing you're good for. I wish that wasn't the case :-/."

If you really care about her, you can still be playful with it, or you can be serious and tell her whatever you're thinking. Just be cool about it, and be ready and willing to accept it if she leaves or something. Most of the time, she won't- which is hilarious to me. As long as you're not supplicating, she hasn't really lost interest in you, so keep that in mind. I'd like to hear what you said though.

2011-04-04T20:43:57+00:00

This is something I actually have experience in. I was completely honest when I was in that situation: "This is what I want now but things change". I was completely clear and honest, I enjoy spending time with her and I want to keep doing that. I'm not opposed to something in the future but it is too early for us to be serious.

To my utter surprise the girl became more interested. Probably not a surprise to some guys here but I had gone out on a limb.

I can't say it will always work since it just happened to me once. But it was pretty powerful stuff. That girl got pretty hung up on me for quite a while.

sockthepuppetry · 2011-04-04T20:13:36+00:00

Be honest and don't lead her on. Recall how much it sucked as an AFC to get lead on by women. Do nothing that's inconsistent with the frame of "I'm chasing other women" if that's your MO.

If you want to be vague, the best thing that's IMO morally defensible is, "Hey, I'm having a fun time with you. I hadn't thought further ahead than that."

2011-04-04T22:00:42+00:00

This is what we both want now, obviously. Worrying about it now won't help me, or you. Let's have this, this moment, this night and I'll tell you we can talk about it all day tomorrow, alright?

That's what I'd say.

huls · 2011-04-04T22:18:03+00:00

Worst thing to do IME is to get all Dawsons Creek on her and start talking about your relationship status, or worse your emotions.

I'd probably use something along the lines of "That's the idea" or "I'm doing something right, then" in this situation - anything to stop it from turning into an actual conversation.

You want her to be thinking about you more than you think about her - the more you tell her, the less things she has to wonder about. As long as you don't give her a straight answer, you can probably get away with saying just about anything.

Title	"I can't tell if this is all you want me for."
Author	GreaterBeta
Upvotes	0
Comments	10
Date	April 4, 2011 6:09 PM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/gihfh/i_cant_tell_if_this_is_all_you_want_me_for/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-cant-tell-if-this-is-all-you-want-me-for.1317050 https://theredarchive.com/post/1317050

Comments