I can't find original ideas for dates

TheDoctorCoach · 2013-06-11T01:30:19+00:00

I don't see the value of originality. Every type of date has been done before.

What you want is something that works.

I recommend meeting at a grocery store, shopping for food together, and cooking at your place. That requires some attraction first.

2013-06-11T05:28:18+00:00

The idea that you need some original, amazing date plan presupposes that the value in going on a date with you is not spending time with you, but the environment where it's taking place. This is a presupposition that works against you.

Part of learning to seduce is forgetting to date. Leave all the dating wisdom you've picked up behind, even if only temporarily, and give the seduction frame a genuine, honest test-drive. To abuse the analogy, don't drive your new BMW like it's your old Ford Taurus!

SpencerLJensen · 2013-06-11T10:24:22+00:00

You only need one and keep doing it with each new girl. After coffee, I like a picnic for the second outing.

recyclablebantha · 2013-06-11T13:25:12+00:00

I don't know if this just is an excuse for me to chicken out, but i never think of something original or genuinly fun to ask a girl out on a date.

Yes, it's an excuse. I've literally used the same date plan 3-4 times in the last couple of months, down to the same venues. No problems, whatsoever.

I just feel like the typical cup of coffee won't work in my situation.

Why not? It sounds like you're making this more difficult than it needs to be. By FAR. Even a coffee shop would be fucking great if the company was good.

I also have a question about this: does going out on a date imply that i want something serious? But i don't really want a long-term relationship

Why call it a date? That word carries with it so much extra meaning that it drives me crazy. I've gone out on plenty of "dates" but never called them that. Because the word was unnecessary. I proposed plans to someone, she said yes, and we went and did those things. End of story.

If you don't use that word, nothing more serious will be implied, and you'll have the freedom to create whatever level of seriousness you want, according to the conversation and tactics you use during your time with them.

If you don't want a long-term relationship, tell them that, at some point during the time you hang out with them. If they want one, you'll want to know so that you can make a decision as to whether or not you want to hang out with them still.

but i don't go out clubbing because i don't have any friends that like the idea.

This is a terrible way to decide your activities. Many of my friends don't like to go clubbing very much, so I go without them. And they go to bed early. Everybody is happy.

Going solo is crazy, you say? Crazy like a fox. Think about it:

You don't have to worry about logistics, like who is driving. You don't have to worry about bullshit like the designated driver pulling the plug on the night early because they're fucking lame.
You don't have to worry about potentially cock-blocking, AFC friends.
You don't have to worry about getting everybody together so you can get to a venue, or gathering them up if you want to change venues. You can just fucking go.
You determine how late you want to stay out and no one argues with you.
You'll be free to meet new people who share the interest of going to clubs. So you'll be able to gather new friends who enjoy going out instead of staying in.

While I'm at it, I'll debunk a couple of major myths about going solo:

No one cares if you came alone. If anything, you're going to get points for having the balls to do it.
You're not going to come off like a creep just for coming alone. And by the way, standing around like a wallflower is going to be just as lame whether there are friends standing next to you or you're by yourself.
You don't need a wing-man.

The important thing is that you ENJOY the activity that the venue revolves around. If you're going to a dance club, you should enjoy dancing. If you're in a bar, circulate and shoot the shit with people. (Read: don't stand around holding the walls up. Go partake.)

Grainslol · 2013-06-11T14:46:12+00:00

Just do what you want to do

Title	I can't find original ideas for dates
Author	Kappio
Upvotes	0
Comments	8
Date	June 11, 2013 1:09 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1g34wc/i_cant_find_original_ideas_for_dates/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-cant-find-original-ideas-for-dates.1353708 https://theredarchive.com/post/1353708

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