On drawing boundaries and letting go?

baconessisgodlyness · 2013-10-20T14:53:40+00:00

It's impossible to suppress emotions like love and affection, and you shouldn't try to. Actively attempting to suppress a certain feeling just causes it to occupy your thoughts. You just have to make sure your feelings never affect what decisions you make. Do you consider yourself a fairly logical person? If so then that shouldn't prove too difficult. I've managed to stop interacting with girls I had known for years through the simple act of realizing there are literally 3.5 billion women on the planet and there'll always be a better one to find.

You just have to ask yourself a few questions: Is what this girl did really all that disrespectful and does it really even matter? If this a pattern with her or a one time thing? Does it really even affect me? Is it worth confronting her on it? How has knowing her improved me as a person? Is she even worth knowing?

If I feel its a miniscule thing I'll just let it go. If its a pattern of bad behavior and I feel she is worth knowing I'll confront her on it. (You'll see many guys on here preach to never confront a girl about her behavior because you'll lose your chance with her or some shit. I personally have never cared about that possibility). If its a pattern of bad behavior and I really gain nothing from knowing her I'll just drop her completely. Losing poison is no loss at all.

Its not about being cold or calloused. Its about being logical and managing your time and relationships. You'll only be in this world a short time. Don't waste any of it on shitty people if you can't use them for improving yourself.

Truth be told though I'm not entirely sure what you're upset about in your post. You hooked up with an ex and that's all I really got. Did you want to get back together or something?

kingcal · 2013-10-20T15:35:26+00:00

In that situation, once you've broken up with someone, in general it's best to just cut all ties. You can't hook up with someone you don't talk to.

In an on-going relationship, it's much harder. You have to be very honest. Not just with her, but with yourself as well. You have to be ready to lose the girl. I've had girls admit to "testing" me by showing up late, expecting me to chase them, etc... and I flat out told them that it wasn't acceptable. Ultimately it didn't work out with them because they were very immature, but I had to give them the chance to grow up. Either way, the responsibility was mine to tell them that I was unhappy with what they'd done.

Title	On drawing boundaries and letting go?
Author	nycprowl
Upvotes	6
Comments	6
Date	October 19, 2013 11:40 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1ot0p0/on_drawing_boundaries_and_letting_go/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/on-drawing-boundaries-and-letting-go.1360152 https://theredarchive.com/post/1360152

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