EDIT 1:

Before you read, I'd like to defend this sub as I am not condemning. My obsession with the number of partners I had was a personal one that I felt said something about who I was and that I was inadequate. This post is intended for people to read and understand my journey from a non-sexual active male, wanting to make a difference, and learning some hard lessons on my own. I felt this would benefit a lot of guys who are "stuck" in that petty detail like I was.

My backstory:

Since freshman year of college, I began reading up seduction tips and browsing anonymously on this sub. I followed blogs about men who travel and have over three hundreds of partners, what techniques they used, and how to get girls to comfortably put out. I was 19, a sophomore, when I got laid for the first time with a sorority chick. Why did it take this long? My conservative christian upbringing painted an unhealthy view on sex. I also thought I was doing the right thing. They did not mean to raise me like this, but it still affected me. I didn't want to look like a creep to girls if I straight up asked. I thought you had to trick girls to want to fuck you. I mean, why would girls want to fuck me? I'm not porn-star material. I'm not an athlete. How do I go from a normal conversation with some girl to boning like animals?

What I did wrong:

I did not believe I could get laid just by being myself. But I was not completely wrong. I was a little right. My views on sex and my perspective was making it incredibly difficult to go for it. I saw so many guys be fake and all these girls fall for it that I thought I had to be someone else too. I had just started and many friends have had 4-8 partners. Others much higher. I convinced myself I was behind. So I kept up with girls I didn't really like just hoping they'd be dtf. I also did not talk about sex a lot which is why sexual conversation never really came about. As soon as I was more open with myself and sense of humor, the girls felt comfortable to be raunchy back. :)

What I learned:

First of all, sex isn't a race and it shouldn't be. Sex is a human connection and an experience that cannot be compared to someone else's experience. I became sex-positive. I looked at it as a health factor. I learned that there are plenty of girls who think like I now do: sex is fun, people get horny, bang with someone you're comfortable with. By doing this I became more myself but even better than who I was before. I became confident in who I was and began doing things for myself and my life and stopped being fake. I didn't realize I was being fake, but I was. There are plenty of girls out there with the same immature sense of humor I have, into some geeky things, and into hard music that want to bang. I realized I was just looking in the wrong place.

I was bobbing for apples expecting a banana with an attitude that the water might sting and I had no proof otherwise. But I believed myself.

How I applied it:

I stopped smiling at things that didn't make me happy. I stopped laughing at things that didn't crack me up. I shared videos I found online and liked. I started adding modeling facebook pages to my likes because I love them tat'd girls. Basically, I stopped gauging myself to what people thought of me. They'll never really know me if they choose to judge from a distance. I'm a good person. So fuck 'em. With this boost of confidence girls started noticing me more because I was interacting with them like any other fucking person. They're just like us, but sexier. I started noticing their insecurities too. It honestly made me feel good that someone as gorgeous as they were felt like a typical person on the inside and I was the one they were getting worked up about.

Retrospection: By asking other guys I discovered some started sex early (14-17) and I got mixed feedback about how they felt about it. Mostly, they were just lonely and horny. They weren't picky. Pussy is pussy. I realized how picky I was. As an older brother of many sisters, I had noticed tendencies of women that I didn't like or thought they needed to mature in an area. For example, I've always noticed women hitting on me. I always "toyed" with the idea of banging these girls but I didn't like their personality. Even though they were flaky, I realize now why my sexual partner count was low and I own being picky. I am glad I have a palette and I can find what I want.

Why I stopped:

After I spent so much of my college career learning about seduction and actually discovering how to take action to get some, I came to a screeching halt. I was being a little boy at age 22 about increasing my number. That would not make me a better me or better in bed. I have had a girl who has had more experiences tell me she feels like she can't please me like I please her. I was surprised with her honesty. I'm dating her now and I've come to realize the most important thing in my humble experiences: having a count means nothing. Someone who has a history partners cannot be measured against someone in a sexually active and sex-positive relationship. I have had sex at minimum once a day for the past year (periods can't stop the freak train) compared to those I know who need to be looking for a hookup. Those 40+ hookups throughout a year don't compare to the 300+ times you can bone someone in a great relationship. The game can take a while. So I stopped. I stopped chasing the higher count and enjoyed being with someone who wants to fuck me as much as I like fucking them. There are many other things out there besides just sex. If you are like I was, don't dwell on it. If it happens, it happens. The bigger deal you make of it, the bigger you will let yourself down.

Post-Seduction:

I have helped some other guys who have asked me about tips or advice and I generally link them here with a few tips from my own experiences. I still firmly believe there are great core values in seduction: Personal confidence, sex-positivity, charisma, and self-motivation.

Thank You

For taking your time to read through my experiences and healthier realizations.

Help me make this post more helpful

If you can help me structure the post better that would be helpful. I was really excited to be open with my own personal success story in this topic and how everyone can do it too.