Hi all,

To family and most suprisingly homosexual men I've been told I'm very handsome, I guess it's due my defined jaw and cheeks, I've also been told I should model as well. However It just seems girls my age (18) just really don't care about me. I'm ultra shy and reserved around girls, thus when I see other guys get approached by girls, I don't see myself as handsome at all, It's drained my confidence, and the really really REALLY rare times I've dared myself to approach girls in more social settings and just kinda got a one word response from them with no interest, it really just made me feel desperate and clingy.

I've read many reddit posts similar to my 'issue'. It sucks because I've never had a girlfriend or even kissed a girl and I'm 18. I'm not after sex - merely even after a serious relationship, not even that at times, to be more honest, to talk to girls like my confident friends do. I don't smile much either, and I've read that some males can be intimidating to girls, but it's never crossed my mind and most friends I've asked agree I'm no where near intimidating.

I don't know why I care so much about girls.. why I feel like I have an obligation to love someone, I guess it really IS human nature but I can't bring myself to not care. And when I manage to do, I'll see a guy with a gorgeous girl and break inside. It really sucks and sometimes It feels like girls give me chances but I can't act on it because I'm so fucking shy. Heck I can't even tell a girl "excuse me" in crowded situations so I'll wait back like a loser. I guess previous experiences prove that girls get frustrated at me since there was a time I didn't talk to a girl and she roasted me in front of my friends saying how pathetic I was. All these previous experiences I guess have shaped me now, and I thought working out and acquiring abs and muscles would help, but I was wrong.

On social media surprisingly I would have really famous gay guys direct message me telling me i'm cute, but when it came to girls, they wouldn't even reply or they'd simply leave short one word replies. Rarely I'd get girls indirectly complimenting my facial features but that's after talking to me for a while. They wouldn't jump out and "omg you look soooo hot". When I'd post a photo on social media, only the closest female friends would like it, even though I'd have really attractive girls follow me now and then, and whenever girls would post "inbox me, bored for chat" or something just along those lines, I would "attempt" to message them and never get messaged back. On social media I felt like a beta to be completely honest. It fucks with my mind that I constantly get called handsome and beautiful (which to some might sound like blessing) but it's not from girls that I like. Girls just seem to not care about me... I don't understand why I can grab the attention of famous males online either gay or straight but when It comes to women I am forever chasing them, I HATE that feeling, it makes me feel weak and desperate I don't wanna be like that. I guess the only positive time in life was meeting girls from Europe online when I was bored on a vacation through apps like KIK and they've told me that girls would go crazy for a guy like me, especially in regions like Russia and Sweden, but it seems more Western girls like American, Australians and Brits just really don't give a shit about me. I could have walked past naked showing off my body and they would literally not give a shit about my presence. But hey at least old guys in the gym love staring me down!? right?

In social settings they say "guys must approach" but countless times I've seen girls ask other guys too, lets say in this situation for help to move things, even though I'd be right next to them, I'd be invisible... In large groups, my friends will talk and girls will keep conversations going with my friends but I'd be shut down and whenever I'd say something I would come out as if It's not intended for the girl to hear. Honestly maybe I am supposed to be gay since that is all I can attract, but a gay who is not attracted to men... how does this world even work...? Maybe I just don't tick boxes for girls, I'm really clean and like I said, close friends call me a CK model when I am out with them in public. Two things I believe is wrong with me is, either my game sucks, or for too many young girls my age, I'm just not their type. I have to insist for an attractive girl to follow me back on social media. I always have to "insist" on them where as some other guys just have it naturally. And by naturally I mean, they'll be a situation and the girl will just be interested. One time I was with my good friend and I was waiting for him, this girl I liked back in high school worked at the shops nearby and so he went inside and grabbed her number. Just. Like. That. And that girl would make me get all nervous and sweat even if she sat next to me when I was attracted to her. Pathetic.

I have some friends who are complete douche's and brush off every girl yet they are still so successful. I don't want to be some ladies man, but in all truth, why can't I have the attention most "attractive" men get from women, heck I can't get anything. And it seems I only get that attention in situations like when my friend's ex messaged me about my friend, she began to go on and say how "hot" and "sexy" I was, obviously a bit unloyal but that's really the only rare situation. So what gives? Am I unapproachable? I feel like I am? I also feel some girls constantly stare at me in the shops but I don't think thats the case. Close family tell me that they don't reveal who stares at me because my "ego is high enough". I don't get it...? wtf?

Edit I dont wanna seem or come off as an ultra douche, but the handful rare girls that do message me, usually overweight and will constantly message me to the point where I must block them. We all have standards, and trust me, mine are not high, as long as the girl is clean and generally fit like me, i'll usually be attracted, it just seems that they are never to me, and you here people say "beauty is subjective" well why does my friend with a hairy belly and bushy eye brows seem to make all girls fall for him? When I have these conversations people say "it's because he picks up sluts", I dont label girls are sluts, but in my eyes they are STILL girls and he is STILL succeeding and his social media proves so, my flashy model poses score me 10 likes from my 500+ followers and his dopey immature poses scores him 200+. People say "it's just social media" but social media most of the time is a good representation of how someone in real life.