Friends that have no interest in approaching women

2017-06-08T17:57:47+00:00

I'd just agree to disagree with the guy. You can't agree on everything with people.

That won't prevent you from making friends with people who share these interests. And if that guy judges you for it, then perhaps he's not such a good friend after all...

To me, a lengthy friendship does not necessarily equal a healthy friendship. Respect should be the basis of any friendship, and if he shuts you down in front of everyone, he's not being a very good friend. But that's just my take on it.

readonlyuser · 2017-06-08T21:26:08+00:00

This friend is holding you back. You can agree to continue being each other's security blankets, or you can start pursuing your goals. Your new behaviors - which are to be applauded - are threatening the dynamic you two had, and he'd rather see you fail so he doesn't have to address his own shortcomings. "Above sex" - absolutely ridiculous.

recyclablebanthas · 2017-06-09T02:32:04+00:00

__1__

Friends that have no interest in approaching women

Really. doesn't. matter.

You act as if your friends need to approach for you, or something. Who gives two fucks if the people around you want to interact with other people? You're the one who needs to do it.

__2__

My friend has ZERO interest in this. He likes to say it's because he considers himself above sex, but really I think it's a cop out.

It is. He's not "above sex." He's full of shit and can't even have an honest conversation about it with you, despite having a "lifetime friendship" with you. Knowing a guy for a long time doesn't mean he's your friend. It means you have history with him. That's a different thing.

I wouldn't mind it by its gotten to the point where it is polluting my mindset. Negativity, bagging on me for getting rejected (what he says affects my confidence more than the actual rejection!).

Yep. He is choosing to be discouraged by the fact that you're taking action, instead of being motivated. He is further choosing to react to all of that, by putting you down to make himself feel better.

Sadly, you've outgrown your friend. He needs to be phased out. You can still be friends in some situations, but he's going to hold you back if you keep him in your regular rotation.

I told my friend "haha she has a boyfriend and he's in the car" he calls me thirsty in front of everyone at this spot.

Dick move. He's officially not your friend. Friends elevate each other, they don't work to hold each other down. Have a funeral for the friendship, say goodbye to it, and move on.

__3__

Problem is I work with him so I see him everyday. My question is, have you guys dealt with this sort of thing before? Did you tell your friend about it or did you just compartmentalize them into a section of your life that is just for video games, etc?

Compartmentalize, yes.

And I've had exactly your experience before. You need to just make a shift and no, it's not up for discussion with this guy. You've already seen that his response to discomfort is to attack you. He'll try to weaken you emotionally if you tell him that you're phasing him out.

So you just do it. Keep your interactions at work limited to professional matters. And find other people to hang out with outside of work. To this effect, there are plenty of things you could/should be trying out.

Hash runs. Trail running + beer + fit people = win
Couchsurfing meets. Hang with travelers and people who like to be around travelers.
Social partner dancing. Salsa, Tango, Lindy hop, West coast swing, etc. You really can't go wrong. Learn something fun and have an excuse to be close to a girl in a fun and non-threatening way. Also, you're going to learn how to get comfortable being in close and touching a girl and learning how to know when and how they like being touched.
Download the Meet-up app. Scan for groups near you that you share an interest with.

VodkaClub1217 · 2017-06-08T20:33:18+00:00

"what he says affects my confidence more than the actual rejection!"

Sounds like a friend that you should consider dropping. I understand if it's just lighthearted ball-busting but this guy sounds like he's privately jealous of your courage to cold approach and doesn't want to see you improve with women.

2017-06-08T18:11:06+00:00

Find friends who share your interest in dating and meeting women and hang out with him more than you do with this friend

sergeant_flem · 2017-06-08T18:42:02+00:00

You need to find different friends for different situations. Hang out with him when you just want to play games, find a new group of friends to go party and meet girls with

Sad_Sleeper · 2017-06-08T20:40:42+00:00

From my experience, it is better to cut him off asap. These kind of people are having negative thinking, which affects your way of thinking. Belive me i am still trying to work over that kind of thiking. Hating someone for some minor bullshit.

This is a great video about that kind of behaviour.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_VQbtO3ChM

hogiethebear · 2017-06-09T04:59:55+00:00

If it doesn't bother you then just ignore him. I wouldn't befriend a lifelong friend just because he has issues with woman himself. He'll prob regret it later anyways. NEVER BURN BRIDGES

Title	Friends that have no interest in approaching women
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	10
Comments	8
Date	June 8, 2017 5:38 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/6g2gz7/friends_that_have_no_interest_in_approaching_women/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/friends-that-have-no-interest-in-approaching-women.1425810 https://theredarchive.com/post/1425810

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