wagwan mandem I know it's been a while since I posted but I had heaps going on this summer and I'm back! anyway my mate callum is turning 16 and he's having his bday do at Nando's which is kind of a meme between us it's very random and hard to explain. anyway i already know im going to order the peri peri chicken with perinause sauce but what I don't know is WHAT IM GOING TO WEAR!

Normally when we go to Nando's I just wear fuck all because it's just callum and I'm not trying to bone him (I swear on me nan's grave i'm not bent). But there might be 2 girls there. 3 if you count callum's mum and 4 if you count his nan. the 2 younger girls are callum's sister Sophie who is well fit and she's 19 so definitely knows her way around a nob lol...or callum's younger cousin Samantha who's 13. Both of them are within my age range (13 to 80 hahaha i'm so horny and before anyone says anything I'm only 15 so I'm not a peado) but anyway I don't know which girl I should go for...and whether I should dress old for Sophie or young for Samantha. I think if I try to pull Samantha I should go for a hoodie and some rip acid wash jeans with wicked trainers or if I go for Sophie maybe I can nick one of my mum's boyfriend Nigel's shirts and even a jacket or something.

Also I was thinking of smoking a cheeky cig with callum after nando's which will make us look well badass (he bought 3 cigs from darren in year 12 for 20 quid but worth it in my opinion). I'm a bit concerned about getting cig smoke on Nigel's clothes because he's already well miffed at me this week because I did a shit in the shower (I only did it because the toilet was clogged and I thought it would go down the drain a lot easier but it clogged the shower drain and it was a whole thing).

There is also the chance that I will hit it off with Callum's mum...her clunge is pretty beat up from giving birth to callum's massive head so she might be the only one capable of taking my giant todger!

advice lads?