Who/what helped you learn/improve the most?

Drshoes8 · 2019-11-03T17:43:26+00:00

Exercise. Having a fuck it attitude and learned to stop thinking about what others may think of me. Often times it's caused from an ego-defense mechanism that people are more worried about you than they really are and try to avoid social contact when you don't think you need it. It wasn't necessarily just the anxiety which I used to pin everything on as my excuse. I understand there's different levels to this, and some have severe anxiety where they literally can't breath and completely freak out, but a lot of people just fall on that excuse and have negative thoughts in their heads, but can improve their confidence.

Basically fake it till you make it.

2019-11-05T00:07:02+00:00

A few things that have worked for me:

Getting good at talking to everyone! When you go to the coffee shop, talk to the barista. When you sit down with your coffee, talk to the guy at the table next to you. In the line at the grocery store? Make chit chat with the old lady in front of you. I try to find out something interesting about anyone I interact with and approach the conversation with no intended outcome often.
Live an interesting life and be consumed with it. Don't just try to be interesting to get with women. It doesn't have to be hard. Go running, read books, take dance classes, find social groups/interests like a pickup volleyball league or DnD group.
Discover your strengths and best qualities. Feed into them. If you don't know what these are, ask friends and family. Think back to times when you felt good in interacting with someone - who you are at your happiest and best? Bolster the spots where you are weak but don't beat yourself up over them.
Now for women: realise they aren't gods to be worshiped. Nor are they sex machines you to use. They're human beings with their own set of complexities. Everyone of them has their own story that has brought them to where they are and where they intend to go. They're no better or worse than you. They have their own sets of aspirations and dreams, flaws and broken dreams like you do.
Say hi. Smile. Don't let the moment pass if you feel she's cute. Don't count on her ever being there again. Even if she's that girl you see every week at the coffee shop. She might move to another area, stop going to that shop, graduate from college...say hi if you feel compelled.
Everyone says this but think of abundance. Don't get hung up on one girl. Keep your options open until she initiates relationship talk down the line. Most of the times you get rejected, it's not going to be personal. She doesn't want what you're selling. Don't dive too deep into the weeds on mind game tricks. Take yes as yes and no as no. Move on and try again.
Finally, get out of the house. Accept invites to as many events as you can. Get fucking social. Don't use being introverted as a crutch. Being introverted just means you recharge by being alone, it doesn't mean you're anti social or awkward. I'm fairly extroverted but I've been awkward af and made a fool of myself multiple times. I'm pretty socially adept now but I get stuck in my head. Sometimes I don't always feel like going out, even though I know it will be good for me.

sinbad2011 · 2019-11-05T15:25:44+00:00

Self reflection AFTER each night and day, not DURING.

Recording yourself helps a TON. Voice recorder on your phone will change ur life.

HelplessItalian · 2019-11-04T00:09:53+00:00

Gym, Stoicism, Grooming, Having a positive actituded.

You will see the difference in all aspects of your life once you start taking care of yourself.

Title	Who/what helped you learn/improve the most?
Author	themainheadcase
Upvotes	4
Comments	4
Date	November 3, 2019 5:25 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/dr3kht/whowhat_helped_you_learnimprove_the_most/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/whowhat-helped-you-learnimprove-the-most.1482848 https://theredarchive.com/post/1482848

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