Getting her in bed

Joel504 · 2020-03-05T05:49:30+00:00

Sounds like she fucking someone else

DaydreamingMister · 2020-03-05T08:29:09+00:00

Are you still courting and dating your wife properly? In other words, YOU take the initiative to plan an EVENING date, and you schedule with her for an activity that you do not detail for her in advance (so a bit of anticipation and mystery can excite her), but you do tell her an idea of dress code that would be fitting for the evening;

you arrange for a babysitter who can also put the kids to bed; you make the effort to look good and smell good and behave good on the date;

throughout the date, wifey has your full attention and sustained eye contact while you do whatever it takes to snap out of your "after ten years and three kids, I already know everything about her" mode - so you can be genuinely interested in and curious about her; (Yo - it has been perhaps YEARS since you put your best foot forward with her like this - you're about to put in WORK, homey.)

you spend the date getting her to talk by asking questions about things SHE would LOVE to talk about ("So what's the most fun you ever had at a wedding weekend?" "What's the most fun you ever had in college?" "So who's the funniest person you know; who makes you laugh the most? Really? Tell me a funny story about them!"); she should be doing 70 to 80% of the talking (I know you've heard that on average, women use far more than twice the amount of words as men do in a day).

you as the leader keep the direction of conversations light and positive - no heavy or serious topics. Keep conversation playful and fun ("Girls just wanna have fun," remember?). Like I said - ask questions about the kinds of things she would love to talk about. A decent app for this that has some (though NOT ALL of them are) questions I could see working nicely: EbyStorm. You might also find uses for the UltimateIntimacy app.

you may even have started off the night with appetizers somewhere for 45 minutes before announcing, "Let's go over to ____ for _____ (could be drinks, dinner, coffee...); and by the way, two or three different locations on a date night is something she NEVER saw coming; you may even be smart enough to make the final location be one that involves some type of physical activity - bowling, dancing, etc. and this gives you a chance to be a bit physically flirtatious/bump into each other flirtatiously...

at some point that seems good, you go for the kiss and lead that into making out with her like you two were teenagers again; then kissing leads to heavy petting, heavy petting leads to YOU saying, "Let's get out of here and go back to my place," with a smirk and a wink.

you planned for the logistics of sex...in other words, you've planned so that you're not gonna return back to the house to find all 3 kids on the floor watching tv, just waiting to jump up and jump all over mommy and kill any chance of her staying in sexy-time mood; and you made sure none of her other common mood killers are waiting at home to distract her attention.

For you as a married dude, a date is this:

a fun-filled, romantic opportunity for sex to eventually happen. Your job is to plan those over and over until the end of time (*and keep switching things up - she'll get bored doing the same things all the time).

Repeat after me:

The courtship never ends. Not even after you've been married 30 years.

nagaisou · 2020-03-05T07:11:17+00:00

How have you been trying to get her in the mood?

Usually for women, foreplay starts way earlier than men think.

Give her a kiss in the morning, hug her after you came home, never forget to continue to try and seduce her and make her feel special.

Insaneflirt_max · 2020-03-05T06:25:10+00:00

Start going to gym again bruh

mr_Tobbor · 2020-03-05T10:18:01+00:00

Being in very long relationship and having children is a turn back for women. But there are other reasons you haven't sex anymore. Only a genuine conversation with her add on a therapist can help both of you to have back the plaisure of sex.

quinnmcd · 2020-03-05T12:42:50+00:00

This post had to be taken down because it appears to be focused on a specific situation or person. While Field Reports deal with specific situations and people, remember that the focus is different:

A field report explains a lesson learned or demonstrates a Seduction concept.
If the point of this post is asking how to get that specific girl, it belongs in AskSeddit.

No worries though! Though the thread has been taken down, any conversations you have started here can still continue, and if you want to PM a mod to get their opinion on this thread, feel free to do so and they will still be able to weigh in.

For next time, remember that posts about a specific situational advice with a specific person are fine as field should be directed to Ask Seddit (/r/askseddit), not to be confused with Ask Reddit.

ilikepie145 · 2020-03-05T05:46:07+00:00

Talk to her about it and find the root cause

Title	Getting her in bed
Author	Russell-Ran
Upvotes	0
Comments	9
Date	March 5, 2020 5:45 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/fdqq0t/getting_her_in_bed/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/getting-her-in-bed.1491828 https://theredarchive.com/post/1491828

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