I am pathetic. I know that. But I want to change that.
I'm a 21 year old virgin who's never been employed who just finished my first year of university with an absolute minimum of social interactions. I live in a flat with 3 other people, and honestly I think I must have had 30 minutes conversation with all of them combined over the past year. I never went out. I literally spent my entire year sat at my pc in my room to the point where I have posture problems and back pain, wasting money on cam models because I had become desensitized to porn and was too much of a bitch to at least spend the money on real sex with a prostitute. Somehow I'm so out of shape I've managed to get a potbelly even though I'm underweight. I have 3 friends in the whole world, all of which are from before the move to college, and of course they're all getting on with their own lives without me, understandably. Over the years my social anxiety has developed to the point where being confronted or shouted causes me to feel faint - even actually pass out sometimes. I don't believe I've ever stuck to any kind of exercise routine since sports lessons years ago in school. After a year of feeling almost suicidal at times, continuously getting worse and worse grades I've decided enough is enough.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not posting this for pity or whatever. I guess I just want to be honest, for once.
So what I'm asking is: I want to climb a mountain but before I even get to that I first need to climb out of a well. How do I make the first step to climb out?
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