[HELP] Dropping out of uni, family not supportive, poor background etc.

[deleted] · 2015-06-02T07:21:30+00:00

So your parents made enormous sacrifices to give you the best chance you can have to succeed, you're in a field with giant opportunities but it's toooo fucking hard and you're wasting your time on RSD video's???

You goddamn spineless moron, do you really believe IT or being an entrepreneur means you can just hop around on a gold shitting unicorn while fucking hot babes? It's a fuckton harder then reading a fucking textbook and studying.

The only right thing to do is to bitchslap yourself until you wake up, apologise to your parents, redo the year and get your fucking degree. And if entrepreneurship is so important, start a business while studying. A fuckon of people work & study at the same so you don't have any bloody excuse except being weak & lazy.

[deleted] · 2015-06-02T09:11:30+00:00

Dude your mom has been crying because she knows what you're doing is extremely stupid and she can only do so much. You can do all this shit while learning, a dead end job will suck the life out of you, go fucking apologise to your parents and finish the damn degree.

balalasaurus · 2015-06-02T12:57:31+00:00

I'm not going to try and guilt trip you here. I don't think that will work on you. Instead I'm going to try and advise you the best way I can. Bear in mind, this is my 2 cents.

Don't drop out. And don't swap your majors. You're probably depressed right now and those feelings are amplified by exams. It's normal and truth be told, I can really understand what you're going through.

First of all go and speak to your academic advisor. Tell them how you're feeling and why you're feeling this way. They will likely refer you to a school counselor. That might not help you much, but at least a record of what's happening will have been made. The more aware your school is of your situation, the better you will be able to defend yourself when they eventually question why you should be allowed to repeat the year (if you really have failed as you say you have).

Second, understand that you're in an emotional state right now. You're probably feeling overwhelmed, and as a result, are not thinking clearly. I'm not going to go into the sacrifices your parents have made or anything that will guilt trip you like that. Instead I think you should realize that sometimes you need to take it easy on yourself. So what if the course is hard and people fail? That's life. People fail all the time. The point is to not let failure define you.

You got into one of the best schools in the world for your field. That's great. You've made progress with women and with your social life. Again that's great. What does all this tell you? That you have it in you to succeed. I can bet there were times when you were going up to those girls and you second guessed yourself thinking that you couldn't do it. But in the end you did it anyway and it didn't turn out so bad. Or if it did, you learned from it and improved.

Why can't the same be said of this situation? Sure the task looks daunting, and it probably is, but nothing that's worth anything in life is ever easy to achieve. But you do have it in you. I mean you wouldn't have got where you are in the first place if you didn't. It's a matter of believing in yourself, which I don't think you are at the moment - again something I will say is normal and that I can understand. Even if you don't believe it though, doesn't mean it's not there. You just have to see it.

If you need more advice, pm me and we can talk about making a plan and your next steps. But don't drop out. For your own sake.

redbluepilling · 2015-06-02T10:26:01+00:00

Set aside what society told you to do, what your parents told you to do, and the guilt you feel. Look at this situation objectively. No matter what, you have options. Weigh the pros and cons. At the moment, you need to consider how, if you lost everything and had to claw your way upward toward your goals, how would you do it? With only 2 years of mediocre study and limited useful experience, you're going to struggle to build up a foundation of capital. Entrepreneurs fail. For financial independence, you should fully develop skills that will allow you to make money to live and then invest in your endeavors. At the moment, you're lacking.

You've built up a disdain for this path you've started, but in effect, you've also blinded yourself to its potential utility in reaching your goals. As for the other options, consider you're looking them over with an overly positive bias. So, you see your Engineering degree as useless toward your goal; but, realize that it is a potential tool. An immediate priority will be to establish financial independence and accumulate capital, through whatever means necessary. Again, looking at this objectively, a specific and useful degree will give you a safety net to quickly build. Unfortunately getting the degree is a time sink. Compare that to the time sink of your other options, and consider the risk/reward. Also, since you likely haven't considered this, you can pursue other relevant goals along the way of finishing. 2-3 more years to finish the degree... Along this time, you could work toward your larger goal by taking CS courses to further your entrepreneurial skill set, continue to read / broaden your peripheral education, and you have a good opportunity / environment to develop your game / interpersonal skills (also part of the entrepreneurial skill set).

Surely this sounds like I'm advocating that you should get your degree. Hell no. Degrees can be a waste of time. But, to have a clear view of the options, my main goal here was to point out that pursuing a degree, regardless of guilt you may feel and resentment that has built up...does actually have utility and could work toward your long term goals. Flesh out the alternatives. Consider balance. Remove frustration and guilt from the picture.

mryddlin · 2015-06-02T09:06:58+00:00

Consider getting your hands on some Ritalin or similar to just get you through it. Sounds like a burn-out.

feminazis_stalk_me · 2015-06-02T09:42:22+00:00

Stop worshiping women. They are not the prize. YOU are the prize. You are putting pussy first and letting the rest of your life fall to shit - this is not how a man behaves. Get your priorities sorted out and put yourself first.

Maybe university is not for you - it's not for everybody. Some men are happier working with their hands instead of their brains. There are probably a lot of labor jobs you can take - the pay is going to be shit but everybody starts at the bottom and works their way up. Take a break if you need to. Get out and see what the local job market is like. Maybe you'd be happier doing construction work or being a bartender.

You're old enough now that you can make your own decisions. You don't have to be the man your parents want you to be. Find what makes you happy. But you can't find it if you don't get out there and look for it.

AlphaAsFAQ · 2015-06-02T07:18:36+00:00

deleted

Algernoq · 2015-06-02T15:27:44+00:00

You're being delusional. Have realistic expectations and do what is low risk. Finish the degree and get a job at a large, secure company. Make some friends in school so you don't go crazy again, perfect your English, get an MBA or PhD, and get citizenship in a good country. If you don't have friends now then you do not have what it takes to be an entrepreneur or to date a quality woman. Make some friends now but stay in Monk Mode until you have 1. Citizenship 2. A professional degree from a top school 3. A high-paying, safe job. Focusing on anything else is lying to yourself. Good luck.

redpillmason · 2015-06-02T16:43:55+00:00

You are exhibiting the classic signs of burnout. I had it myself. You will have decades of your life to pursue a business later on. Literally decades. But doing it without a background like you have available to you it will be 1000x more difficult when it comes to finding co-founders and investors not to mention having the knowledge to actually be successful. Do yourself a favor and finish your degree, learn the shit you think you don't need to learn, cause you will need it once you get to the meat of things. Trust me. Knowing how to code ain't shit man, any monkey can do that. Its having the background and big picture knowledge that a STEM degree will get you that separate the men from the boys.

Realize you are making excuses, you are hamstering, realize this man. You want to quit because its too hard. Did you think it will be easy, nothing that is worth anything is. You are in a critical juncture right now. You are sitting on a massive opportunity. Work hard, dig through it, come out on the other side successful. Do not fail now.

Accept your current situation, you fucked up and you failed what you failed. Make a plan to get back on top of things, re-do what you need to re-do, and work on it. Work hard for a few years. Regardless whether you like it or not, it will give you a guaranteed successful life. You will be able to find a job to pay you 6 figures, work a year, and you have seed money to pursue your entrepreneurial leanings. Startup failed? Who cares, you still live in a downtown apartment, drive a Lexus, and can find a job in a heartbeat. You can that cushion. If you give up now, this lifestyle will only be a distant dream. You will scrape by trying to get people to trust you, you will find it close to impossible to find funding for your ideas, and when you fail, you will go back to working in some low paying coding job and your used Toyota Camry. Don't choose the easy path, it feels good in the short term but it leads nowhere.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nb6iN6nGSgo

processedfoodkills · 2015-06-02T17:31:29+00:00

Engineering is fucking awesome. I won't lie, the classes are hard and they don't get any easier, but do not let exam blues cause you to drop out. Put in the goddamn work and get it done. Quitting doesn't make life easier, it makes it harder.

I had troubles. I failed exams and even a couple classes, but I kept with it. I was close to dropping out a few times. I would have regretted that decision. You have someone willing to pay for you to get an engineering degree. Pull yourself together. Get to work. And finish what you started.

i_Hate_us · 2015-06-03T02:20:53+00:00

trust me, i went through this phase but i didn't want to drop out, i hated my major and decided to change it before my last semester, yes i only needed a semester to finish a semester to graduate but i hated it for some reason, long story short you'll only waste your time at best, fuck up your life at worst, after a year off school it just hit me how stupid i was, now i'm back and hopefully going to finish next semester, trust me just finish your school and learn to love it, take a semester off if you need, but always strive to improve yourself and you can only do this by finishing your degree. good luck.

Carbone · 2015-06-02T11:15:05+00:00

You can't seem to be able to study while under a stressing situation. Forget being an entrepreneur you're just a wantrepreneur grass seem greener because I can't focus myself to study on a subject I don't like.

I was there. You're lost about a situation like that... Forget being an entrepreneur you're not made for this.

You have a hard time having a job and going to school. Forget being an entrepreneur. An entrepreneur need to work on his business and learn on his business if you're not doing both you're a franchisee.

In 7 month of cold approach you only went from a kissless virgin to a virgin... In 3 day of rsd/cold approach I was able to get a BJ I put myself in such stressing situation that now I know I can cold approach but now I don't know what is my identity. ( A BJ is not a pull but I went to war and got something, grats for the pull home that turned into a failure, I'm better at doing dates)

You're 20, you have no specialization not expertise no mastery... Forget being an entrepreneur. I'm 22 and I wanted to be an entrepreneur and that business school was going to help me. Nope business school = manager not entrepreneur. I'm going into biotechnology if I want to be an entrepreneur it will be on real expertise that I learned along the way and came about hours of practice and knowing I can do something different.

You have no friends yet you are in this RSD thing... Stop watching video and start doing massive action.

You're lying to yourself. That's why your mom is crying. She know you're failing and you're dream about becoming an entrepreneur is just a way for your ego to protect you : " it's normal I don't like this subject it's because it mean nothing, if I would be an CEO I would need to take more meaningful decision and that would motivate me to do my best"

Life don't work like that, life isn't a dance it's a wrestling. You shouldn't want to be in a different situation to have the right motivation to take action. You should take different action to motivate yourself to change your situation. That's is the difference.

" yeah but all the big entrepreneur are school drop out" They are school dropout because they were already successful without school. What do you have ? A kiss in 7 month of social experimentation ? Free money from your parents because of some risky deal with your landlord ?

You're lost ? I'm lost too.

Don't know what to do ? Finish your session. You did it ?

Question yourself if you need school to learn what you intent to learn the most efficiently what you want to learn and don't tell yourself : "but I can learn what I want from book" Shut up if you would be able to learn that easily with book by yourself you wouldn't be in that situation, being an apprentice is the path to mastery.
Ask yourself if anything else interest you more than your current cursus.
take the next semester as a laboratory/trial semester. Take only class that seem interesting to you. Achieve high grades. Learn work ethics and start a side job. I did that and you will experiment what school was supposed to be, a tool to let you learn freely about what you want from life not a take a path and hope you're a good learner. You will start building yourself and this time you will not have the excuse to say " I don't like this subject it's boring..." You're the one taking that class you're the one in the wrong here.

I wish you all the best. Being in our 20s is hard shit when you saw behind the curtain ( TRP and RSD ) you can't go back to your old conception of life. It's soul destroying, it's hard and sad but it's how life is. You were born as a sacrifice, your parent gave you life while knowing you will die one day.

lift
read a lot
take omega3
learn game
don't be in a LTR ( lost 4 year of my 20s ( from 18 to 22 )
build discipline
build willpower
embrace pain as a teachers
work hard & play hard, don't forget to play hard you will burn yourself on the long run.
run away from mediocrity.
live as much as possible new experience

Further Reading :

The One Thing
Way of a Superior Man
Millionaire FastLane
The way of men
Mastery by Greene
Managing Oneself

trpobserver · 2015-06-02T16:05:08+00:00

I don't want to continue on this course and I don't want to go to any other university in general.

Then don't. Honestly. I really disagree with /u/MrEiffel on this, I don't think shaming and yelling at you will fix your issue. Not at this point. Typically (though I wouldn't declare it impossible) you cannot shame someone into courage, that only works in movies.

I know this because I just dropped out this past semester (my Junior year) from a major that typically has good job prospects after having failed tons of exams and classes over the past many semesters. I actually should have been graduating this year but I left college before this time to to work for a while. I've had to deal with some pretty bad depression throughout my time in college, but if I learned anything it is that depression just meant I was going through a big change and growth must occur.

I will assume part of your problem is the same problem I had, which is that you don't really know if it is worth it. You feel like doing this university thing is something you're doing for other people. That was DEFINITELY true for me, I cruised through high school in a very dull kind of depression and just went to college because its what my mom wanted and I didn't care about what I wanted because I basically just wanted to not live.

Turns out, this isn't a good life strategy. If I could have gone back, before I incurred all these emotional and financial issues, I would have just gone to work for a year or two in some low-level unskilled job. Anything but the long series of mistakes I've been making since I was 17.

Anyways, I would highly advise going through with the dropout and finding a job. Work on finding a job as soon as possible. Right now I'm still looking for one, though I have enough on my resume to land me something that would allow me to pay my living expenses.

If you've got coding knowledge, develop that as much as you can and apply for some entry-level or contract jobs. But be willing to take any other sort of job such as retail.

Some people will tell you that working is harder than college. (Such as: "It's a fuckton harder then reading a fucking textbook and studying.") If that were true I would honestly say that life isn't worth living, in my opinion. But its not true, not in my experience. College is much harder than actual work (at the very least because the hours aren't as hectic), and that would make sense since college is basically the training period to make sure you've "got the stuff."

There is one thing I do agree with them on: stop worrying about pickup. In fact, this is exactly one of those times where girls should be the last thing on your mind, because girls will not help you grow. I think TRP is partially to blame here, because there is such a focus on pickup sometimes that it seems like if you're not actively approaching girls in your life then you're making some kind of mistake. You aren't. Do that stuff in a year, or three. Not now. Please.

I would highly recommend reading the following books as you go through this big change in your life (in this order). Replace all the time you spend on PUA material and use it on this:

Finally:

Do what you want. Most people procrastinate and get distracted and don't have clear goals because they aren't motivated by their own hopes for the future, they are scared of losing what others have given them and/or scared of the shame they will feel in "failing" those people's expectations. Note that all those issues are in your brain. You have control over your body, you can choose what to do with it.
If something somebody says hits you and makes your heart sink and makes you feel ashamed, rationally evaluate that shame and see if it is justified. That is hard to do, I know. Your evaluations will never be perfectly objective but you should always try.
Once you are doing what you want, remember that the most important trait to being good at life is persistence, and the most fundamental trait is courage, because without courage you will have no ability to persist in any endeavor. The path to courage for those of us who have thought our way out of courage - a.k.a. most people - is somewhat complex, but I do believe that the Stoics are a good starting point. The Stoic sage exhibits the most fundamental type of courage: indifference to everything he has no direct control over.

Here's to you creating a great future for yourself, fate permitting!

Title	[HELP] Dropping out of uni, family not supportive, poor background etc.
Author	workharddontplay
Upvotes	14
Comments	16
Date	June 2, 2015 6:46 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/386rot/help_dropping_out_of_uni_family_not_supportive/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/help-dropping-out-of-uni-family-not-supportive.149623 https://theredarchive.com/post/149623

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