If you're naturally shy how do you pick up women?

norwegiandoggo · 2020-08-08T10:07:36+00:00

You can change from being shy to not being shy. Being shy is not who you are. It's what you do. And what you do is in your control and you can change it. If you're talking about your feelings, like social anxiety, that can also be changed and is also within your control.

If you're not a confident, social guy, you have to become that guy, if you want to be successful at this.

caesarfecit · 2020-08-08T13:26:06+00:00

Reframe your shyness. Instead of being shy, you're the "strong, silent type". Women still do go nuts for that kinda guy.

The trick is being able to pair it with some basic flirtation skills and a lot of patience.

Use your aloofness to screen women. Make them earn your attention, give you those indicators of interest, and you'll feel a lot more comfortable escalating with those women. Women don't actually like guys who talk too much, half the time I swear what women really want is a guy with the patience to be their captive audience and listen to their stream-of-consciousness.

I knew guys who were far more introverted than me do better with women than me because they knew how to hang back and let them chase. The trick is to give women just enough to get them chasing, and having the patience to let them come to you.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-08-08T11:31:19+00:00

Like most of the population, you probably think confident and assertive means impressing and entertaining girls just because they give you the time of day. Confident and assertive means that you believe in yourself and you're self-assured enough to feel the freedom to express yourself. This isn't a pick up problem, it's a personal development problem.

I want you to do this exercise: Reflect on what value you feel like you have and could share with a woman and write those things down. Then make another column and write the values that you want to have/improve on. Now you will have a good sense of what value you offer to women (play this up) and what values you want to develop and improve upon (homework).

Zappy__Boy · 2020-08-08T12:45:03+00:00

I don't truly believe your shyness is an inherant obstacle that can't be overcome and I feel like your just labelling yourself as such because its an easy excuse to handle your problem.

The best analogy I have heard of for dealing with shyness and anxiety is to view it like working out a muscle. You can't go out to the gym and life the heaviest weight there, if you try you will make a fool of yourself and hurt yourself too because your doing too much at once.

So how do you lift that heavy weight? You start small and steadily work your way up. I don't know truly how bad it is for you and I can't speak on your behalf, but try doing something small and work your way up even if its as simple as asking someone for the time.

You don't become fit in a day and you don't overcome shyness/anxiety in a day. It takes time and a steady effort on your side to conquer it.

Vidmario_Bros · 2020-08-08T12:08:20+00:00

Just talk to a shit ton of women, flirt with em all. (Unless it's a school or work environment)

If they reject you or flake on you try and see what went wrong and improve from there. Also you can practice meditation because that helps me, also using canned lines for self amusement help a lot.

Title	If you're naturally shy how do you pick up women?
Author	bayfarm
Upvotes	12
Comments	18
Date	August 8, 2020 8:55 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/i5w19l/if_youre_naturally_shy_how_do_you_pick_up_women/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/if-youre-naturally-shy-how-do-you-pick-up-women.1500051 https://theredarchive.com/post/1500051

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