Romance novels are almost exclusively written for consumption by women. There are a few prolific male romance authors (you've all probably seen at least one movie adapted from a Nicholas Sparks novel), but by in large the genre is written by women, for women. If you actually dig into some modern bestsellers, you'll be surprised just how non-PC they are.

Here's a quote from a 2016 USA Today best-selling novel, written by a woman: "Brute, raw masculinity contrasted with gentleness is the most attractive thing on earth."

There is literally a scene in this book where the main character has a dream about the love interest, who works in her office and treats her like dogshit. Like, she genuinely believes this guy hates her, and she hates him back. Well, the dream is a sex dream, and she wakes up from it on the edge of having an orgasm.

I'm not joking... MILLIONS of women have read and loved this book.

4.1/5 on Goodreads, 4.8/5 Barnes & Noble, 4.4/5 Audible

ZERO complaints about the book being "anti-feminist, misogynistic, [insert buzzword here]."

Translation: Be the lion with an occasional and highly exclusive soft side. DON'T be the perpetual fluffy housecat.

What do I mean by "occasional and highly exclusive?" Good question. I mean that feminine women aren't looking for a guy who is rough around the edges with others and soft all the time with them. They're looking for a guy who has an edge and is confident in general, even with them, who occasionally graces them with a small look into a softer side with a little bit of emotion or validation. THEY WILL TRY TO GET YOU TO BE SOFT ALL THE TIME. IT'S A TRAP THEY AREN'T EVEN CONSCIOUS OF, AND IF YOU FALL INTO IT, THEY WILL LOSE INTEREST. She doesn't know it consciously, but she wants to chase those little hits of softness, perpetually.

Are there exceptions? Sure. One example that comes to mind is if you have kids. You can't ever be too good of a dad. Your wife (unless she is a fucking nutcase and has the world's worst daddy issues) won't ever lose interest in you because you are cute as hell with your kid(s); generally, the opposite should happen.

In the US, if you ask a woman who isn't from the deep south or midwest what she wants in a guy, she'll feed you the standard bullshit about how she wants an "emotional" guy who's a great listener and rejects traditional masculinity etc etc etc, we've all seen the verbal puking enough to get the idea. Then, she'll open up her kindle app and read a story about a woman falling all over herself over a guy who generally doesn't give a shit about her, AND SHE'LL ENJOY IT.

Remember when you were 14 and you told your mom that you just wanted a nice girl who was kinda pretty and liked to play video games? Who actually caught your eye in the hallway? Oh right, the girl with the biggest boobs, the best-done makeup, and the lowest cut top (who never touched an X-Box controller in her life). Lacking self-awareness isn't just a female issue; it's a human issue. The sooner you realize it and accept it, the better.

Also worth a read, here's an article from a French feminist who went to Norway (one of the most egalitarian countries on the planet) and asked women there what they were looking for. It actually caused a bit of a national debate when it was published: https://afroginthefjord.com/2016/03/06/what-do-norwegian-women-really-want-from-men/