This is not a short and sweet story, and I really need some opinions here. I know I’m not in the right here but also I know I’m not completely wrong.

2018: We lived in Tulsa Oklahoma and got divorced. She immediately moves to Tx against our court divorce outline. My two boys were on my insurance then.

2021: I could no longer work at the railroad and make the 5 1/2 hr commute between Tulsa and Weatherford Tx. I move to a small town in southern Oklahoma and started working for a friend. It was a cash job and offered no insurance. At this time Her husbands roofing business started doing really well. I tell her that I’m off any insurance plans and since I’m self employed I don’t really have any insurance plans that are available at a reasonable price. She and her husband are also self employed and have insurance. She puts my 2 boys on her plan and I pay her what I can when she needs assistance. It’s not ideal but it’s all I could do at the time.

2022: the business I was working in really starts to tank and I’m getting paid literally just enough to cover my expenses. My friend will ask me how much do I need for rent and then he would Zelle me the money. I had to reduce my CS, and I’m truly ashamed of myself for that. I paid her just what I could. It was about 1/2 of her monthly payments.

2023: I fortunately got a job at a tire manufacturer working maintenance. It’s a steady paycheck but not nearly what I was making when our divorce was finalized. I began making complete CS payments. I was still flat broke and borrowing money from family until I got my first paycheck. But now I have insurance, and told her that I’m going to put the boys on my plan. But she refused because she didn’t think that she’d like the options Blue Cross Blue Shield offered. I told her that’s the best I could do and I’m really not able to afford an insurance plan for a self employed person. She said that was okay and we can work something out.

Current: she reached out to me about insurance saying that the boys have had a lot of expenses and she would like me to do my part and pay for their braces and all the other medical procedures that were already done earlier this year. And also said that I need to do more when it comes to their insurance. I went through my insurance plan thoroughly and told her she has to let me put them on me plan. She agreed and it will be in effect January. Yet still she’s wanting compensation to a medical plan I had no choice in and was wildly less comprehensive and much more expensive. Also, she’s coming after me for the CS I was behind on… which I understand and like I said feel really bad for. But I’m barely scraping by and I don’t know how I could possibly give her anymore money. Also… I was informed in October that the tire plant I’m working for, that has been in this city since 1970 is closing and moving operations to Mexico and I’m going to be out of a job at some point (they’ll give me a 60 day notice).

I realize most of this is me venting, but I don’t know how much more money I can give her before I’m unable to make car payments or electric payments. I’m postponing my rent so I can make sure I’ve got enough money to cover some holiday presents. I’ll be able to make it, just with next paycheck… about a week behind. I just hate living like this and I honestly don’t see a way out of it unless I get an insanely good paying job.