I have no idea how to meet someone that's interested in me.

MoreThanPurple · 2026-03-31T15:11:41+00:00

This was removed due to rule 9: If you are a man and you are here.

Unique_Fly_1195 · 2026-03-31T11:46:40+00:00

Err being in shape is actually very hard and very few people do it? Saying that it will be “very difficult for me even if that happens” is just blatantly untrue.

Idk what age group you are interest in, but especially as you get older and your metabolism slows down being in shape is probably even MORE of a plus and a want amongst women (at least it would be for me lol).

Ngl, for men your personality matters a whole lot more. But you are right, on dating apps people only see the visual first. So imo, go get in shape and go get professional/ semi professional photos taken.

Once that’s basically optimised and you start getting dates, that’s when you can let your personality and your genuine self shine through.

Hope that helps lol.

Nice-Awareness-5827 · 2026-03-31T13:02:22+00:00

You have to get in shape. Theres no way around that. No point in trying daring until you have taken care of yourself first

InevitableKiwi5776 · 2026-03-31T13:41:20+00:00

Do you think you’d be attracted to someone like you if you were a woman? Do you have your own goals, a life plan, a vision for your future? Are you secure that you bring enough to the table to keep the kind of woman you want? Are you a leader in any aspect of your life?

Pycnostyle · 2026-03-31T14:44:14+00:00

Yes, I have female friends. No, none of them have offered to set me up when I ask.

This is telling right here. A good man is hard to find, so why would precisely zero of them ever play matchmaker? There's something with you that's a dealbreaker that they're not telling you about. And it's not your height and weight, because look around you. There are short, fat men who are partnered-up. I'm not trying to hurt your feelings here, but your issue is that nobody is willing to level with you. So you're chasing the wrong goal. I think you instinctively understand this; otherwise, you'd be hitting the gym already.

If I were in your shoes, I'd one-on-one ask these female friends some variant of, "Hey. I know I've asked if you if I might be a good match for any of your single family or friends before, and you didn't jump to play matchmaker. If there's an uncomfortable truth that I really need to hear, it'd improve my life by leaps and bounds if you were to level with me. I cross my heart and triple pinky promise I won't be awkward about it if you tell me the truth, but here goes: Why am I an unsuitable blind date for every single one of your single friends or family members?"

I hope someone will level with you. It's not your physique, but you should hit the gym anyway, for you. Because you deserve to be in good shape and in good health. You are worth the effort.

Funflipflower · 2026-03-31T12:49:58+00:00

No other way around it Get in shape Its brutal out here Being healthy and fit is being disciplined, being an active lover and having quality dates, off springs and parenting Ps: I also had to get fit to get better quality dates

That_Difference_7638 · 2026-03-31T13:43:52+00:00

You’re Short

You’re unfit

You’re complaining

Absolutely no idea why women don’t queue at your doorstep. They suss out these things under 3 seconds flat.

Short- you can’t change that but there’s plenty of short kings.

Unfit- you prefer whining here instead of hitting the gym ASAP so probably it’s not for you either

Complaining- women are drawn to confident men with a mission in life, where they can play a pivotal role in. They prefer men who display competence in some field, and seem to be „the guy“. Leadership is just as important as teamwork. Some kind of almost inappropriate optimism always wins too. Read Enjoy the Decline by Aaron Clarey. And yeah, not every male will end up with a female partner in this economy.

Leveraging your bank account- if that hadn’t happened before, you’ll need about 5-10 years to build that, and be quite sharp between the ears. Also it’s not a make it or breake it argument. Women sleep with broke dudes all the time. Rose from titanic certainly did not cry about her well-off fiancé.

JPDG · 2026-03-31T13:21:45+00:00

Go to a yoga class! You'll get in shape and tons of women go there :)

AutoModerator · 2026-03-31T10:29:56+00:00

Title: I have no idea how to meet someone that's interested in me.

Author NoNeedleworker2631

Full text: Alright, I don't know what to do. I'm a shorter than average, slightly overweight man in the US, about to hit 30. I have absolutely 0 experience with women. Yes, I have hobbies and get out of the house. Yes, I have female friends. No, none of them have offered to set me up when I ask.

I've tried posting my dating profile for "review" in other subs before, more than once with recommended changes. The consensus was that I should delete all apps until I get in shape, and things will be "very difficult for me even if that happens". The best I can do is leverage my bank account until someone decides "sleeping around with hot 20 somethings isn't going to lead to a fulfilling relationship", and even then I'll need to get lucky. Verbatim response from a woman. People, not just men or women specifically, are brutally selective in a market where your only first impression is photos. I'll never be one of the gorgeous young flings that I've seen many women on reddit debating giving up. Yet, unfair as it might be, different hands are dealt to different people.

What are my options at this point?

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Title	I have no idea how to meet someone that's interested in me.
Author	NoNeedleworker2631
Upvotes	5
Comments	11
Date	March 31, 2026 10:29 AM UTC (3 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/1s8jnrx/i_have_no_idea_how_to_meet_someone_thats/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/i-have-no-idea-how-to-meet-someone-thats.1576815 https://theredarchive.com/post/1576815

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