Any suggestions for addressing this without repression?

Independent-Bad218 · 2026-05-04T19:07:50+00:00

In reality personality is highly malleable, supported both from psychology and neuroscience. You win the right to be yourself only after you are competent with success (and that is for yourself, not a strategic decision).

Now for your specifics, to me you read like an extrovert. Any form of social circle game where you organise events and parties takes advantage of exactly what you are describing. Of course, you will have to learn to be subtle and indirect (to maintain social balance).

But the basics of this form is that you swap from person to person keeping the mood high (hence it is high on attraction and "goofness"). Any one on one forms of game after the (usually very fast) attraction phase, you need to tone it down into investment, i.e., real talk. This last part is precisely what is missing from the description of your Game

Known-Student-381 · 2026-05-07T16:54:45+00:00

Expand your understanding of what you see as yourself. fwiw, I'm a similar kind of person. Your notion of 'repression' sounds a little likr how depressed/adhd people worry medication will tamp down their 'spark'. I know the concern well, but the truth is it's unfounded. some food for thought:

You probably act this way as a sort of nervous pressure-valve. It feels like fun, but what it offers is an artificial sense of control of the situation. In effect, though, the energy you give off is likely self-deprecating or approval-seeking or people-pleasing.

That said, a more restrained version of yourself doesn't have to be less funny or witty. Men act like idiots (of a certain flavor) to impress women all the time, and it works. Women by and large respond well to cocksuredness in the right context; they think you're reckless, but in controlled doses it comes across as fun and exciting. And women love wit too, because they love to laugh. Those aren't negatives.

In a nutshell, I don't think being yourself or having fun is actually what's holding you back here. I think some part of you feels safer playing yourself off as a fool (self-deprecating) rather than simply adjusting your delivery to come across as witty and confident. As always, I recommend therapy (it's honestly just amazing), but you could resolve this in a week or two with practice if you can actually make yourself believe there'a a win-win rather than self'abandonment at the end of the road.

edit: and if you haven't tried community theater and improv, you're not only missing out on something you (personally) will probably enjoy, but the male:female ratio in theater troupes is ideal. Men get thrown the same kind of roles that women desperately compete for. Just be respectful in those groups please.

drewster23 · 2026-05-04T01:14:31+00:00

Have you tried not doing that? I really don't know what suggestions you're looking for.

Title	Any suggestions for addressing this without repression?
Author	CoolFunnyPersona
Upvotes	0
Comments	5
Date	May 3, 2026 1:17 PM UTC (2 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1t2l8ub/any_suggestions_for_addressing_this_without/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/any-suggestions-for-addressing-this-without.1579505 https://theredarchive.com/post/1579505

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