What's the best response for when a subordinate crew member whom is older asks, "How old are you?"

7Fig · 2016-02-15T00:30:44+00:00

I had a similar role at a young age as well. I found that some people couldn't get over my age and they had to move on.

There is no point in hiding your age (although I wouldn't point it out). When it comes up give a bland honest answer. You're ability to lead and the examples you set will determine how effective you are.

FakeGuru · 2016-02-15T08:39:37+00:00

There is nothing wrong with saying "I am 23".

You will pause slightly.

Your internal dialogue will be full of slightly amused mastery, which will transmit itself through your body language.

What happens next is crucial.

You wait for the other guy to respond.

Then, if he does nothing, you give a little nod to acknowledge that part of the interaction is over and move on with whatever you were going to do.

If, however, he says something stupid, you give him a look and a little shake of the head before moving on with whatever your next task happens to be.

Remember, you answer the question calmly with some amusement.

You do not justify yourself.

You express your mastery through slight body language movements (and you create that state by what you say to yourself internally and how you say it).

You convey your status by speaking slightly slowly and controlling the conversation with (subtle) pauses.

medik13 · 2016-02-14T22:43:09+00:00

if they say something like that then you already fucked up bad. focus on cultivating a respectful working relationship so your age wont even be an issue.

assured_destruction · 2016-02-15T03:29:55+00:00

I'm 54, most bosses are now younger than me. I have no desire to be a manager a good manager is not defined by age If I were you when asked I'd reply proudly, I'm only 23... and smile

red-triad · 2016-02-15T05:15:54+00:00

Give them your age, but to not try to qualify it in any way.

I see most people say "23, but I have done this before" or something like that.

SocialJusticeWhiner · 2016-02-15T08:13:30+00:00

When I started selling real estate I was only 20 years old. People were always asking my age. I think it's best to stay relaxed and kind but flip the script and say, "Why do you ask?" They usually realize it's an inappropriate question and change the subject.

Synthtwo · 2016-02-15T13:12:21+00:00

I'm 23. I've had trainees as old as 74.

I just tell them, honestly. They're trying to learn from you they want to be on your good side so may as well be friendly.

If they're dicks, get rid of them. They're probably dicks to others as well.

awalt_cupcake · 2016-02-15T05:30:26+00:00

Shit test.

-- A&A ("I turn 87 this month!")

-- ignore which may make superiors dislike you

-- preassure flip ("23-what-about-yourself?")

-- change subject ("how long you been working on cars for")

EntitledShitHead · 2016-02-14T23:35:09+00:00

First of all, they won't ask, if you carry yourself with a lot of respect and you come off as a strict/stern person. If they ask answer with 23, there's no need to lie. If for some reason they keep pushing or insinuate that you're too young to be there supervisor say something along the lines of: "yes, I am young, my enthusiasm and the fact that I haven't formed habits in this management field are my strong points" or something like that. It probably won't happen, but just in case it does you have to turn your inexperience and young age into a strong suit for yourself.

Momo_dollar · 2016-02-14T23:35:51+00:00

Depends how its asked. If asked to try and undermine you because of a decision or mistake you make or out of someone being butthurt, or whether it's general curiosity because you look young and the person asking is impressed at what you have achieved. I realise you are smart enough to figure the difference , but maybe when it happens you won't due to work pressure or readying yourself for it only having a negative motive.

Negative: Just say my IQ is higher than my age as I hope yours is.

Positive: Answer, build on it, find out about the person, gain an ally etc always good to have a trusted general on your side who knows the place, the people, and nuances more than you do.

Title	What's the best response for when a subordinate crew member whom is older asks, "How old are you?"
Author	throwawayfortrp1
Upvotes	11
Comments	25
Date	February 14, 2016 10:39 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/45teza/whats_the_best_response_for_when_a_subordinate/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/whats-the-best-response-for-when-a-subordinate.160761 https://theredarchive.com/post/160761

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