Regaining frame on date 2

boy_named_su · 2020-08-18T17:24:15+00:00

not every girl is gonna fuck on the first date. if you got a passionate kiss, you're doing okay. don't worry about it

keep escalating. aim for an emotional roller coaster of a conversation before hand.

but ya, drop her if no pussy by end date 3

Blackhawk2479 · 2020-08-18T17:18:43+00:00

You’re only creeping into oneitis territory because she is turning you down for sex; see this strategy of hers for what it is.

You can try the usual ways to ease through LMR (standard sidebar stuff) but if this doesn’t work on the next date then your best recourse might be to employ the same strategy and take further dates off the table, e.g. next her and accept the possibility that there may be no coming back from that.

le_wolfe · 2020-08-18T18:38:17+00:00

You gotta get more options.

Bungeeeeee · 2020-08-18T19:48:35+00:00

Somehow difficult to believe you have 2 other plates you are regularly fucking.

First, you shouldn't care. Second, have fun. If there is not enough desire from her side, and thereby no sex, you just do other things and maybe give her one more chance if you find the time.

Just don't get emotionally invested in a girl you didn't even fuck, like you are doing now by writing this post.

reduxDev · 2020-08-18T17:40:10+00:00

I would like to bed this girl tonight and will lose interest and next if I don't.

this one is creeping into oneitis and is fucking with my mind.

These are contradictory statements.

You're not going to "lose interest". You're going to give up, you obviously care more than you should, thats why you posted about it.

I think any sane valuable girl isn't going to fuck on the first date unless you're famous.

I agree you fucked up the frame, because you pushed her to a "hard no". The relationship is now dictated at her pace because you were too pushy which was interpreted as neediness. Why are you asking her anyway? What was the context? Where you taking off her clothes or were you saying "lets go back to my place"? You might as well ask "Hey are you a whore?".

That being said. Heres what I'd do. Go on 2 more dates with her and friendzone her. Treat her like a little sister without putting her down. Don't make any moves and don't do any "man to woman" things. Tell her a few times how nice it is to talk to her, how you appreciate her in some way. And leading up to the 2nd date text convo her alot.

Then just ghost her. You just got super busy all the sudden, too bad. If other people ask "we just had no chemistry".

Don't talk to her for 2 weeks, if she forgets about you, you got your next. But ghosting will make her reflect on what happened. This can gaslight her into thinking that she actually fucked up and killed your interest with the rain check.

The being friendly 2 dates is fuckboy insurance. You next her now (which is probably the best thing for you mind/perspective) and she'll just think you're a fuckboy who just wanted to fuck her and move onto the next girl. But being super friendly shows you're a real human who wasn't just trying to hump and dump. You're not obligated to be super friendly ever again, but since you can't go for sex without being pushy and needy anymore, you should show her you're "not like the other guys" lmao.

You need a little beta behaviour mixed in because you went way too alpha at the start, but the ghosting prevents the negative side effects of the beta shit because you clearly don't need her if you're ghosting her and she knows the friendly stuff results in a ghost, she'll get the message that if she wants your time she'll have to put out without thinking you're a douchebag.

Title	Regaining frame on date 2
Author	Renegade7158243
Upvotes	0
Comments	8
Date	August 18, 2020 4:59 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/ic4wch/regaining_frame_on_date_2/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/regaining-frame-on-date-2.170013 https://theredarchive.com/post/170013

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