What keeps you motivated?

Ionnas · 2015-06-14T05:37:46+00:00

Go out there and grab life by the balls.

I think you've lost motivation for life itself because of some sort of escape, be it video games or a TV series. Both of these are a fucking curse.

You have nothing you care about: What about your own well-being? No dreams? What about a huge fucking sailboat, or a busty blonde lusting for your attention

I grab life by the balls whenever I get the oppurtunity: Hitting the gym, taking an extra shift at my shitty job (to get some more money), going to a party - whatever. Life is made for living.

TheRedMoss · 2015-06-14T15:49:31+00:00

I fell into depression a few years ago. I sounded a lot like you. I was apathetic. I saw no point in anything. It got to the point where the only reason I would get out of bed in the morning was for food.

One morning while having my frosted mini wheats and a glass of orange juice I had a brief moment of enlightenment. I realized there was no "point" to life. I realized nothing I did would matter once I was dead. And I realized that was awesome. So while I finished that bowl of mini wheats I formed a new game plan for the rest of my life.

The reason I was feeling the way I was was because I had no direction in life. I had no cause or passion and the years I spent trying to come up with one were fruitless. Since nothing really mattered in the end, I decided the point of my life was to have a good time. That's it. "If nothing matters I might as well have a good time" were the exact words I mumbled between spoonfuls.

Most people go through their lives doing whatever the TV tells them will make them happy. This doesn't work because everyone is different and likes different things. I couldn't care less if someone came in right now and told me I was now the owner of a Project Hermes Yacht I wouldn't care because I don't give a shit about yachts and I don't like the ocean. But if someone handed me the keys to a 2015 Honda CBR600RR I'd shit my pants.

That brings us to the most important part. You have to find what brings you joy. Sounds easy. It's not. What I did was turn it into a game. I would talk to every person I could (take a look at this recent post). I had social anxiety so first I had to internalize two things. One: the quote "behind every fear is the person you want to be". And two: It doesn't matter how badly I fuck up the conversation because the other person is too busy thinking about what breed of kangaroo they want their new leather sofa made out of to think about you for more than two minutes. There's over 7 billion people on earth so if you make a fool of yourself with one just find another. Shouldn't be too hard.

When I talked to these strangers I only had one goal: Find out what brings them joy. People love talking about the things they enjoy so it shouldn't be too hard to figure out and gather some information on whatever it is. Once I found that out I'd try it myself. Sometimes I'd do it with them, other times I'd never speak to them again and try it on my own.

Over the course of two years I tried hundreds of things from paintball to firefighting, computer coding to mountain biking. Whatever they said was fun I'd try with an open mind. Some of it sucked. Some of it was awesome. Most if it was meh. In the end I had more hobbies and interests than I knew what to do with. I picked up archery, firearms, road biking, motorcycling, backpacking, harmonica, jiu-jitsu, and many, many, more.

A number of things happened during this process.

I cut out all the shit in my life that didn't bring me joy

I quit my job that I hated and had one I enjoy a lot more within a week. I'm making over twice as much as most people my age and love what I do.
I disconnected myself from anyone who wasn't helping me move forward with my new life. Listening to people with no will to help themselves was not on the approved list of "things TheRedMoss enjoys doing"

I also made a lot of friends

For example I saw a guy my age on a cool motorcycle. I knew nothing about them so I walked up and started a conversation. Now we each have a motorcycle and go on rides doing all kinds of cool shit.

What started out as the simple goal: "Do shit I like, avoid shit I don't" spiderwebbed. Motorcycling brought with it learning motorcycle maintenance. Archery and shooting firearms brought the desire to hone my skills and get better/faster. Wanting to backpack on different mountains forces me to travel, go new places, learn about equipment.

Your problem is not having a goal and not having motivation. Well now you have a goal and motivation will start flooding in as soon as you get a taste of the new life you're working towards. Believe me, doing these things is fun no doubt but seeing myself grow as a person, seeing the skills I'm gaining, and the social relationships I'm forming is worth more than gold. It's a snowball effect. The more you get out and do stuff --> the more people you meet --> the more things you hear about and try on and on.

Wanting to do these things in life comes with a set of demands. Obviously you need a job so support them financially. LOOK AT THAT! All of a sudden your pointless 9-5 has meaning because it allows you to buy that new mountain bike, or allows you to save up for that trip to Costa Rica.

If what you do is physically demanding than the physical conditioning you do and vegetables you eat serve another purpose. Every mile you run, every weight you lift means you'll be able to push yourself a little further next time you're hiking a mountain or competing in a jiu jitsu tournament.

Very few people have a true passion in life. More frequently people pretend to have a passion. They cling onto something and make it their life's goal so that they feel like they've accomplished something and their life has meaning. If you've reached the point where you can accept that your life has no meaning, chances are good you won't leave a lasting impression on this world, and that's just fine... than you're ready to start LIVING.

abdada · 2015-06-13T23:19:13+00:00

Nothing keeps me motivated but the thrill of earning a reward after working hard.

I avoid "high reward thrills" because they come unearned. Even Netflix and Spotify are non grata to me.

By working to earn my rewards I also get that determination built in.

imgonnabethegreatest · 2015-06-13T23:50:21+00:00

DOCTORxTEETH · 2015-06-14T01:08:21+00:00

I want to give people something to talk about at my funeral.

Super-Saiyajin · 2015-06-14T02:12:28+00:00

Rejection

RocketManV · 2015-06-14T03:28:42+00:00

I just had that thought yesterday. Up until now, I've done things for the sake of doing them. This has gotten me pretty far.

Considering how powerful sex is, and me being new to TRP, I figured out to use that as a motivator. Not all of my motivation, but as a new source. By improving myself, I'm upping my game and potential pool. I'm capable of pulling alright girls, but that can be so much better. I'm game for that.

Title	What keeps you motivated?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	1
Comments	18
Date	June 13, 2015 11:11 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/39r5b8/what_keeps_you_motivated/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/what-keeps-you-motivated.190150 https://theredarchive.com/post/190150

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