I haven't posted for a little while, been head down stfu'ing, training, reading, and more importantly now.. planning.
I've received helpful feedback, bitchslaps, sage advice in response to my previous posts.
I'm about 6 months into MRP, first couple of months was just pure autistic fucking up and reading, and re-reading, then more autism. Sometimes this shit seems like rocket science to me, sometimes so fucking simple.
I've described previously how, I'm married w/ a wonderful young child. My wife isn't like many of you guys basically well-rounded but lacking in the bedroom. I fucked up totally and picked a low quality partner to marry and i've been working on a way to get out of this without getting totally fucked over.
As a recap, she's refused to go back to work for 2.5 years now, and at the same time refuses to look after our child full time, who has been in nursery nearly full time for a year now next month. She's not a good egg.
I stuck to 5x5 SL over the summer for 15 weeks and made some strength gains. However I strained my shoulder and after taking some advice have switched to Greyskull LP which i've modified for more hypertrophy. I've also started MMA twice a week and it's amazing. Been a beta pussy forever, and all of a sudden, even just working towards my first belt I feel more confident.
I earn decent money, but that's not the problem, without my wife and I working as a team, and with her refusing no matter what to be led. I have decided the following plan.
- The house is going on the market this month
- We aim to sell before Jan / ASAP
- We both move back to our respective parents and share custody of our child in the interim
- I pay off all the debts we have accrued due to her not returning to work and contributing to the property we bought on the basis of us working as a team
- The leftovers are put into high-interest investment vehicles whilst we save up
- Early next year, post Brexit we observe which way the market goes and then it comes crunch time
- She must choose, fall in line with my plans, trust me as Captain that will guarantee our success and security as a family for the next 20+ years, or she can go it alone and we split up
- If we split, we would have already ditched the only matrimonial asset we had. And also during this interim period, reduced my work so that I can get my income down and time with child up.
I'm 90% sure that during this time apart, I will be happier apart. Then I move forward with the 'let's be friends and not give all our cash to the lawyers' talk. The 10% reservation I have is that through this action plan, it might blow up her fixed view that I will forever be her betabux...because I won't anymore.
Basically... i've spent a lot of time considering, if I was single... what would I do? The answer is move to a cheaper area with good schools and easy commuting. Buy a property 50% cheaper, and start throwing all allowable tax free savings into investment. All this would free me up for taking bigger risks business wise too. So if she's not down with that, and i've made all the calculations based on my own earning potential as that's the only thing I can count on... she has to decide, if I don't first.
We've been together for 4.5 years, child for 2, we were IM friends for about 4 years before and she totally sussed out I would be a sweet betabux and i'm pretty certain that a) I will always be that to her, and b) it would require an amount of effort fair beyond the value of it to pull her mutinous, bitchy, lazy ass along with me.