In the past I've had some difficulty with anything that comes off as a command by reacting with anger. Over the past two months I've adopted the idea that if it is something I was going to do anyway I will ignore it and continue like normal. If it is not I'll either be playful, ignore it, or just say no. It has helped with the anger tendentiously.
Today I have two that came back to back that I've been thinking about. I went for a run and when I came home I jumped in the shower. This is around 12:30 in the afternoon.
My wife walked in and started talking to me.
Wife: "When you get out of the shower make us some coffee."
Me: "What is stopping you from making it now?"
Wife: "I don't want to make it."
Me: "I'm not in the mood for any and I'm not going to make any."
Wife: "Make it!"
Wife: "But I don't have any hands. They fell off."
Me: "I'm sorry to hear that."
Wife: "You are making the coffee."
At this point I quit responding and continued my shower.
About a minute later she opens the door, tells me to get my hand wraps that I put out on the line to dry and bring them inside, then quickly leaves.
When I get out of the shower I see that she made herself some coffee and also made me some even after saying I didn't want any. I told her thanks and put it in the fridge to drink cold later.
So 90% sure the coffee thing was some compliance test and everything seems fine. The handwraps have me thinking though. I planned on bringing them in today since they should be dry. If I go get them inside and fold them up will she view it as her getting her way and then I'll "fail" this second test? Also since they happened so close together is it her trying some other tactic of just getting me to listen to her?