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Compliance testing?

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July 30, 2017
6 upvotes

In the past I've had some difficulty with anything that comes off as a command by reacting with anger. Over the past two months I've adopted the idea that if it is something I was going to do anyway I will ignore it and continue like normal. If it is not I'll either be playful, ignore it, or just say no. It has helped with the anger tendentiously.

Today I have two that came back to back that I've been thinking about. I went for a run and when I came home I jumped in the shower. This is around 12:30 in the afternoon.

My wife walked in and started talking to me.

Wife: "When you get out of the shower make us some coffee."

Me: "What is stopping you from making it now?"

Wife: "I don't want to make it."

Me: "I'm not in the mood for any and I'm not going to make any."

Wife: "Make it!"

Me: "No."

Wife: "But I don't have any hands. They fell off."

Me: "I'm sorry to hear that."

Wife: "You are making the coffee."

Me: "Nope."

Wife: "YES"

At this point I quit responding and continued my shower.

About a minute later she opens the door, tells me to get my hand wraps that I put out on the line to dry and bring them inside, then quickly leaves.

When I get out of the shower I see that she made herself some coffee and also made me some even after saying I didn't want any. I told her thanks and put it in the fridge to drink cold later.

So 90% sure the coffee thing was some compliance test and everything seems fine. The handwraps have me thinking though. I planned on bringing them in today since they should be dry. If I go get them inside and fold them up will she view it as her getting her way and then I'll "fail" this second test? Also since they happened so close together is it her trying some other tactic of just getting me to listen to her?


Post Information
Title Compliance testing?
Author toomanybaddecisions
Upvotes 6
Comments 13
Date 30 July 2017 07:12 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/205780
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/6qj7u9/compliance_testing/
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[–]sexyshoulderdevil75% Liquid Sarcasm10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

The "my hands fell off" tells me that she is actually quite playful. She was doing some normal shit testing to see if you would comply. You didn't comply because you didn't want coffee and she could easily do it herself. BUT...you missed on an opportunity to have some fun...and she probably would have enjoyed it.

Wife: Make us some coffee. You: No. Make me a summuch while naked. Wife: I'm not doing that!
You: Then go make make yourself coffee while naked. Wife: Uh, still no. You: Fine. Just make yourself coffee later and get in the shower now and be naked. (Maybe porn music)

[–]BobbyPeru4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you were going to do something anyway, do it... On your own time frame. No comment or reply is even necessary.

Don't overthink this thing.

[–]Schlippery_Schlong5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy

So if she were to tell you "go to work!" when you wake up in the morning would you call in sick?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Obviously I'm going to go to work. I'm trying to understand just what she is thinking during those moments though. I'm not going to change what I'm eventually going to do based on what she says. But does she somehow equate that with compliance?

[–]matrixtospartanatLVRed Beret6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

"i'm trying to understand just what she is thinking during those moments though." "But does she somehow equate that with compliance?"

This is where you failed and why you are posting about this.

It doesn't matter what she is thinking.

This statement and question by you is where you leave your frame and enter hers.

If she told you to breathe, you wouldn't stop.

If you were taking a shit and she told you to wipe your ass, you wouldn't skip the paperwork.

Shit tests ARE foreplay, if YOU make them that way.

Her: "Make us some coffee." You: "No." Her: "But I really need you to make the coffee." You: "Why?" Her: "Because my hands fell off." You: "I'll miss that handjob tonight. Need help with an alternative?"

Make it fun and playful.

Do what you are going to do, when you are going to do it, because it is the right thing to do. It doesn't matter what she thinks, or what she says about it.

[–]Schlippery_Schlong1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Let her think what she wants to, just do what you're gonna do. If she comes at you with a disrespectful attitude, turn it into a joke and carry on with whatever you were doing.

In other words fuck what she thinks. If your hand wraps are dry or if you were intending make coffee/ take out the trash/ clean out the garage/ grow a pair or whatever just do it.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Or schlap her in the face with your schlippery schlong and call it a day

[–]BluepillProfessorMod / Red Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don't have any hands. They fell off.

She has Amused Mastery down. This doesn't sound hostile. She was just play'en and you were not having any fun at all. Why not?

Could have stepped out of the shower naked, wet and concerned and grabbed her wrists. Could have made a sexual innuendo or a sexist (funny) comment like ordering her to make you a sandwich.

Hopefully you get that Shit Tests are largely unconscious with women and she is not telepathically communicating with the hive on her next tactic to destroy you. Not consciously anyway but...you know what I mean.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

In trying not to react to her, you are reacting to her.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Getting there. a pinch more STFU, or some good humour and you're 100



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