So about two weeks ago I wrote a post on my redpill journey and my impending divorce here asking for some advice.

With one week to go before "nuking", I thought I had an iron mind and that it was going to be straightforward; the plan was made, just execute - don't think.

Yesterday the wife was in a great mood, being nice to me all day, cooked a great dinner. After finishing the food, when she was clearing the table it hit me like a ton of bricks that all this will be gone in a few days. I broke down and cried (walked to another room), which I haven't done since the funeral of a very close relative a few years back.

Of course my wife noticed it, I didn't say why but she consoled me and made me feel happy again in a few minutes. It screwed me up thinking how maybe I was making a mistake by giving up on this marriage already.

While this is a bit of victim puke, any pointers how to stay strong until the end without faltering? I tried taking it out at the gym but unlike anger I didn't feel pumped. Maybe I just need someone to call me a bitch to man up.

The cynic in me is already thinking she's happy because she's dreaming about her emotional affair and their upcoming meeting. The blue pill side is thinking about all the good times we had (sunk cost fallacy) and how we know each other so well that I doubt I'll ever have that again in my life.